Return to Transcripts main page

CNN Talkback Live

Do College Students Drink Too Much?; Mid East Tensions Flow onto Campus; Are Women Still Changing their Names when Marrying?

Aired April 09, 2002 - 15:00   ET

THIS IS A RUSH TRANSCRIPT. THIS COPY MAY NOT BE IN ITS FINAL FORM AND MAY BE UPDATED.

THIS IS A RUSH TRANSCRIPT. THIS COPY MAY NOT BE IN ITS FINAL FORM AND MAY BE UPDATED.
ARTHEL NEVILLE, HOST: Hello, everyone, and welcome to TALKBACK LIVE. I'm Arthel Neville. The world's attention is focusing on the Mideast, where old hatreds rage and violence is currently an everyday companion. But it might surprise you to know the battle between Israel and the Palestinians isn't being fought just over there. It's spilled over onto our college campuses. And that's where we're going today. So, get ready to take sides.

Call me at 1-800-310-4cnn or e-mail: talkback@cnn.com. Now, take a look at what we have in store.

(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)

UNIDENTIFIED MALE: The Israeli government is in the occupied territories to defend its citizens.

UNIDENTIFIED MALE: Exactly like the ghettos that were created in Poland and Germany in the 1930's...

(END VIDEO CLIP)

NEVILLE: Is the Middle East conflict finding fertile ground on U.S. campuses?

The battle lines are drawn between Palestinian and Israeli sympathizers. Can this skirmish be limited to just words?

On other campuses it is spring break, and according to the numbers, too many students are dying to get drunk.

(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)

UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: I can't really think of anyone our age that doesn't do that, a couple of shots before go out, shots at the bar, like it is a normal...

(END VIDEO CLIP)

NEVILLE: A new study suggests it is time for campus boozers to dry out before they die out. And when it comes time to walk down the aisle will you give up your name in exchange for the ring? It could be more important to your future husband than you think. OK, right now we are going to look at another side of campus life, the party, and why not? For a lot of schools it is spring break and if you believe all the spring break shows on TV, you know, the girls dancing in those little bikinis and all of the other carrying on and you wonder, where are their mothers.

Anyway, if it is all about that, it is about bingeing on alcohol, sex and drugs. The report commissioned by the National Institute on Alcohol Abuse and Alcoholism blames a half million injuries and 70,000 sexual assaults on binge drinking, and the study notes some 400,000 young adults between the ages of 18 and 24 blame drinking for having unprotected sex. I've got a bunch of college folks in the house. Make some noise, college people.

(APPLAUSE)

All right, don't be shy, stand up, Missy, I am going to start with you. What do you think about all this? Is this overblown or is it true?

MISSY: I think that the drinking on campus is part of a college experience and you have to be responsible enough as an adult once you hit 18 to really drink responsibly, and take care of it. I think a lot of people have blown this idea of binge drinking a little out of control and they are blaming it a lot on different aspects when it really is the student's responsibility, I believe...

NEVILLE: I agree with you.

MISSY: ... to take care of themselves. If they are old enough to be in college, they are old enough to know what their limits are. And if they are not able to understand that they shouldn't be at college without supervision, in all honesty.

NEVILLE: Let me talk to David back here. You are a guy. Stand up. You are in college, right David? What do you think about this? I mean, is there a lot of peer pressure involved here?

DAVID: I think like what we heard, you can make a choice, and it is your own decision, but I mean if you want to drink, you definitely have the option to, no matter where you go, no matter what night of the week, you can always find a party to drink of you want to.

NEVILLE: But according to the study, it is depicting college people as just being wild and crazy, you are drinking, you are falling out, you are throwing up, you are going to the hospital for alcohol poisoning. Is that the picture that is happening?

DAVID: Well, I think there is a lot of that, and just because it is sensational when you hear it, that is probably what you will hear more than we just went down town and had a couple beers. You are typically going to hear the stories where, you know, five or six went out had a good time, and six of us ended up in the hospital.

NEVILLE: All right. Thank you first of all, Drew, stand up for me, Drew. Tell me how do you see it. Is it more the case that college students are drinking like crazy, or they are doing it responsibly?

DREW: Well, you know, it is a big stereotype that all college students drink. And personally I do not drink and there is a large amount of people on campus that do not drink. It is a problem, and I think that a lot of accidents or abuse do occur because of drinking, but it is important for people to realize that not all college students do drink, and I think that that is a problem in the day's society.

NEVILLE: I think you deserve a rounds of applause. Thank you very much. And I will come down to the front row and talk to some of the ladies here, the lady in the pretty black and white here, stand up for me, and do you feel pressure at all to go out and drink, and do you know of people who do drink and lose self control?

UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: I think that drinking is everywhere, whether you are on a college campus or if you are in high school, drinking is everywhere. And you are always going to have the option to drink, and it is your personal decision, and I think that alcohol being there gives you the opportunity to learn what you can do and what you cannot do and what your limits are, and it really helps you to become a responsible person.

NEVILLE: That means that you experiment first and you realize, you know what, I should not have had that other kamikaze.

UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: You always have...

NEVILLE: What do I know about kamikazes -- AAHHH -- hey, I was in college too. No but seriously, I did drink in college but I was I responsible, and that is the whole key. I think you can, and some people are going to get mad at me, that they probably want me to say that you should not drink at all.

But I am saying if you do, you should be responsible and not get out of control.

UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: I definitely agree with that. Like I said, the option is there, and a lot of people do make mistakes, and it helps you to learn and become a better person.

NEVILLE: Have you made mistakes?

UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: No, I have never made mistakes before.

NEVILLE: OK, your mom is watching. Thanks Candice. All right.

And are going to bring in Ralph Hingson now. He is the associate dean for research at the Boston University's School of Public Health. He led the study on college-age drinking.

Ralph, first of all, welcome to you.

RALPH HINGSON, BOSTON UNIVERSITY, SCHOOL OF PUBLIC HEALTH: Thank you. NEVILLE: Most of us are apparently misinformed about the affects of alcohol. If you can help us clarify some things, like how bad can it be to have a couple of margaritas?

HINGSON: We know that particularly when people are driving, that impairment and driving performance can begin with the first drink. The legal blood-alcohol limit in the United States is.08. I would have to consume about 4 drinks in an hour on an empty stomach to get to that level. A 135 pound woman would have to consume 3 drinks in an hour to get to that level. All the data indicate to us that at that level there is at least an 11-fold increased fatal crash risk, and among young people, young men in particular, a 52-fold increase risk of being involved in a fatal crash. So drinking up to that level can certainly increase the risk of traffic fatalities.

NEVILLE: Yes, there is no doubt that if you are going to drink, you should not get behind the wheel of a car at all.

HINGSON: Well, there is no question about that. That is why it is illegal in all states for people under 21 to drive after any drinking, and as I said, we now have 32 states where the limit has been lowered to .08.

We should remember that a lot of people who are effected by that are people other than the drinking driver. They are the innocent victims. And one of the things we were concerned about when we looked at the study on college drinking is that it is not just drinking and driving that we need to be worried about. The people -- innocent victims are affected by assaults. There were 600,000 who indicated -- 600,000 college students each year are assaulted by another drinking college student.

NEVILLE: Because he is just drunk and out of control?

HINGSON: Because they have been drinking to excess, yes. And 70,000 said they were sexually assaulted by another college student.

NEVILLE: And them you have the whole situation -- exactly -- of date rape.

Let me get Amy into this conversation. You are from Texas. What college?

AMY: I go to Clemson as well. I just wanted to say that I think that a lot of dealing with irresponsible students has to be with friends, and friends should be there to take care of their friends that are out of control and make sure that things, you know, if you see a friend that could possibly have alcohol poisoning, get them to the hospital. There is a responsibility for those friends to take care of them, and there are irresponsible people, but there is a second step to that as well.

NEVILLE: OK...

HINGSON: If I may say something, I think the point she made is very good. The solution to this is going to have to come from all segments of the community including students. Students need to take care of each other and they need to make sure that there is an effort to protect innocent students from the behaviors of others who have had too much to drink.

NEVILLE: I have a caller on the line right now, is it Ben? Go ahead. What do you have to say?

CALLER: Yes, I go to Maryland and I have been watching the news from Maryland College Park and they've had a few students who have died of alcohol poisoning. And it is a real problem. Especially recently with when they won the basketball championship there were riots, and a lot of it could be directly attributed to the alcohol consumption.

NEVILLE: So Ben, how do we get students to stop drinking too much?

CALLER: I think that the problem is that not the policies that are in place, I think enforcing them -- on campus police and campus administrators and other people who are supposed to be reducing problems like that, they don't. They do not do a good job. Same thing liquor stores around the campuses will sell.

NEVILLE: They will sell.

CALLER: Yes, they will sell.

NEVILLE: Absolutely. Thank you Ben, first of all, for your comments. And Alana, what are your thoughts?

ALANA: I have been to a dry college and I have been to a college that has a wet campus, and college with the wet campus seemed to cater more to students that are drinking. They set up bus systems at night to get students out to the bars, and they get them home safely. So they had less DUI's and tended to have less accidents, and the dry college closes its eyes and acts like drinking didn't really happen as much, and DUI's did not happen much. I have seen more of my friends at the dry college get DUI's than at a wet college. I think they should open their eyes whether they are dry or wet and realize that drinking happens. It just doesn't not...

NEVILLE: Thank you very much, and that is a great point you made there. And the lady back here, Tammy, I would like to get your thoughts at this moment.

TAMMY: Yes, I am a professor at a local university and I would like to say I believe that students do have to take responsibility and so do their friends, but it actually originates with the parents because the parents have to teach their children, who are young adults, to be responsible, and values so that when they do go off to school and become adults, then they have that value system and that level of responsibility.

NEVILLE: Right but the parents are not always there, when it happens. And you know, thank you very much, professor Tammy for your comments. We have much more talk about, with this, students in the audience, raising their hands. They want to jump in, and I want to hear from you as well, so we are going to take a break and talk more about this after the break, Don't go anywhere.

(COMMERCIAL BREAK)

NEVILLE: Welcome back to TALKBACK LIVE. And we're talking about college binge drinking and I promised this young man up here, Thomas, that when we came back I would let him get in on this conversation. Thomas, I am true to my word. What do you have to say?

THOMAS: I think one of the problems is the fact that the law doesn't let you drink until you are 21. And I think in other countries where the law is less, people are responsible more at a younger age, whereas in America what happens a lot of the time is that students don't get the chance to drink because it is illegal, and when they get the chance illegally they do it so much because they do not know when they are going to get another chance to drink. And I think if the laws were a little bit less strict, people could drink socially and responsibly at a younger age and that would...

NEVILLE: It makes it less of the forbidden fruit, is what you are saying. Ralph, what do you think about that?

HINGSON: Surveys done in 25 European countries in 1995 and they found that in all of the European countries people were starting to drink at a younger age than here in the United States, but in half of the European countries the greater percentage of young people were drinking to intoxication.

So I am not sure that having a lower drinking age is going to make a difference in improving that situation. That data on the impact of raising the drinking age clearly indicates that it saves 700 to 1,000 lives a year. Parenthetically, the Europeans repeated their survey this last year, and half of the European countries, even a greater percentage of younger people were drinking to intoxication.

NEVILLE: Hang on. Thomas wants to jump back in here.

THOMAS: I mean I can understand what you are saying, but I think I have seen it from a student's points of view, and I must say that in America the problem in worse than it is in Europe.

HINGSON: Well, the data that has been collected...

THOMAS: Sometimes the data does lie. You must admit to that.

HINGSON: Using exactly the same questions that are used here in the United States would suggest are you wrong. That actually, in half of the European countries more young are drinking to intoxication. In Europe they have lower legal blood-alcohol limits and people cannot drive legally until they are older than they are in the United States.

In the United States when we have so many young people driving motor vehicles, we need to have policies that will prevent them from getting in crashes that kill themselves and other people.

NEVILLE: And Daniel, you want to weigh in.

DANIEL: I was born and raised in Guatemala as a missionary, and over there we actually see, even though they will sell to you even when you are 13, or you know, they will sell it to just about anybody, you may find that they may control it more, but in the end there is a higher level of alcoholism. They get hooked younger when they are less responsible, and from that point on they cannot recover from it.

NEVILLE: Excuse me, Thomas, I am coming back to you. What do you say about that?

THOMAS: I think I am fighting a losing battle, but yes I can understand what he is saying, but from a personal point of view, I don't agree with you. In America, I think it is a problem, and alcoholism is a big problem.

NEVILLE: OK, no fighting, gentlemen, I know. Listen I want to let a phone caller weigh in now. Dimitri, what are your thoughts?

CALLER: Hello?

NEVILLE: Hello, go ahead, you are on the air live.

CALLER: As a direct response to the question placed on the topic, should college campuses become dry, I feel that it is apparent that when that happens the level of binge drinking goes up exponentially, and students place them selves in more danger because they cannot drink at parties, so they drink incredible amounts before they go to the parties.

NEVILLE: That is an interesting thought. Ralph, did you hear that?

HINGSON: Yes. I think points out that we cannot just restrict policies on college campuses. We have to work with the communities that the campuses reside in. If we crackdown on campuses, that will just drive the problem out in the community. If we crackdown on the community, and don't have restrictions on campus, it will just drive it back on campus.

What we need to do is have the campuses and the communities work together. The evidence, by the way, clearly indicates that the younger people are when they begin to drink, the greater this the likelihood they have of developing alcohol dependence, of frequent heavy drinking to intoxication, even after controlling for that, being unintentionally injured under the influence of alcohol, being in physical fights after drinking, being in motor vehicle crashes after drinking.

And this is true not only in adolescents, but in college years, and adult years as well. We known for years that raising the drinking age reduced injuries and fatalities among people under the age of 21. This suggests that there may be a carry-over benefit to adult life.

NEVILLE: Ralph, thank you very much for your comments and information. Ralph Hingson thank you very much for being here, and to my students in the audience, give yourselves a hand, you did a good job, I am happy with you. Thank you very much.

And when we come back, Middle East tensions boil over on U.S. college campuses. We are going to talk about that next. It is going to be interesting.

(COMMERCIAL BREAK)

NEVILLE: Welcome back. There is growing tension on college campuses between pro-Israeli and pro-Palestinian groups. Today, students at more than 30 campuses are mounting pressure on Universities to get rid of stock in companies that do business with Israel. It just happens to be Holocaust remembrance day.

Let's go to San Francisco now where Palestinian student Basim Elkarra is president of the Muslim student association at the University of California at Berkley. He is also a member of students for justice in Palestine.

Also from Berkley, Jessica Oleon, president of the Jewish student union. She plans to attend rab -- rabin -- rabbicnacal...

JESSICA OLEON, JEWISH STUDENT UNION, UC BERKLEY: Rabbinical school.

NEVILLE: Rabbinical, hello, hello, thank you very much, school, pardon me, rabbinical school -- from this Catholic girl -- in Israel. OK, thank you and welcome to both of you.

OK, Bahin, let's start with you. What is the significance of the protests to you and other Palestinian students and what do you hope to accomplish?

BASIM ELKARRA, MUSLIM STUDENT ASSOCIATION, UC BERKLEY: My name is Basim, and I would like to begin in the name of God, most graceful and most merciful. Before I begin, in the beginning of your show Arthel, you said that old hatred is coming up, and if we look at the Middle East crises, there is no old his hatred. If you look at the history of Muslims and Jews living in the Middle East, there is the (UNINTELLIGIBLE) Jews, that you know, peacefully for hundreds of years after the Spanish Inquisition, so we have to be careful using "old hatred."

Until the problems arose when the state of Israel, and European settlers came, then there became problems. But before that there was...

NEVILLE: So, I am not quite sure if you told me what you hope to accomplish with the protests.

ELKARRA: OK, about the protests, we are trying to educate people, Americans, that what is going on in Israel with our taxpayer money, funding these Apache helicopters, tanks, F-16's that are killing innocent people. So we are trying to bring awareness and with this divestment, just like the apartheid in South Africa, there is a divestment campaign which worked, and which really helped to bring an end to apartheid, so we are trying to do the same when it comes to Israel.

NEVILLE: OK, Jessica, what are your thoughts and what is your position? What do you hope to accomplish with protests?

OLEON: To be honest, we are not scheduling a protest. This Yom Hashoa, which is the international day of holocaust remembrance, and the only piece that the organized Jewish group has put together on campus is a 24 hour vigil where we read the names of those who were murdered in the holocaust. And we read those and light candles and people take shifts and we have a memorial service. And that is what the organized Jewish community through He'lal (ph), the Jewish student center has planned. Unfortunately. There is a coincidence, in terms of this date and I think it is sort of a tragic one.

NEVILLE: April 9th 1948 is -- is it Basim -- going to say that that is more significant to him -- Basim.

ELKARRA: That brings which is the disaster for Palestinians in (UNINTELLIGIBLE) , where we millions of Palestinian were forced out of Palestine. And it is also a commemoration of (UNINTELLIGIBLE) the massacre which was carried out by (UNINTELLIGIBLE) which were Jewish terrorists groups prior to 1948.

So I mean it is a very, very sad day for us too. And we have to look at one thing, I mean the holocaust is a sad thing, but we Palestinians did not do it. You know it was the Germans that killed 6 million Jews and we have to suffer for this. So it is a sad day for Palestinians commemorating the massacre of (UNINTELLIGIBLE) so, we are trying to commemorate this on campus today, bringing awareness about the massacre and what the Palestinians went through.

NEVILLE: Jessica, you can jump in at any point.

OLEON: I want to clarify, as far as we are concerned there is no connection between the holocaust and what happened at (UNINTELLIGIBLE). There was a massacre during the War of Independence 1948, and that was a tragic thing, but it is not on par with the slaughter of 6 million Jews and 10 million other people in Europe, homosexuals, Gypsies and the planned destruction of Slavs. There just is not a parallel.

There is a tragic situation currently occurring and we care very much about it, the Jewish community is very concerned about all kinds of elements with this issue, but we are very uncomfortable with the idea of equating what is happening in Israel and in the Palestinian Authority to genocide, and to what happened during World War II.

NEVILLE: Let me let one of my audience members chime in. This is Mohamed. What do you say?

MAHAMMED: Yes, I think it is rather tragic if we start to like look at the symptoms of the problem as the problem. Like what is happening right now, the intifada and the occupied territories are the symptoms, and taking sides saying well, the symptoms are only like, what we have to look at, but we also have to look at the disease, which is the occupation of the occupied territories. I think if true peace can take place, they have to really try to cure the disease, which is the occupation and...

NEVILLE: Thank you. I want to take that and run with that, and ask or our two student guests here, do you ever see the Israelis and Palestinians living in peace side-by-side, and if so how do you accomplish that?

OLEON: I absolutely think it is possible. It requires good faith on the part of everyone involved; the Palestinian people, the leader of Arab states, the leaders of Israel, the elected government, and also the goodwill of the Jewish community around the world and the good faith of the United Nations, and actions on the part of the United States.

What is necessary is two states to be established with defensible logical borders, so that each can be sustained. Each can profit economically, and the people of each community can live in peace, without hurting each other. And that goes both ways.

NEVILLE: Jump in their, Basim for me.

ELKARRA: If we want peace we have to stop this occupation, the brutal oppressive occupation, and this man, Sharon, he has never been a friend of peace. He has been against the Camp David accords with Egypt. He has been against every peace process, that Israel had with any Arab states.

And before Oslo, he spoke out against this, and (UNINTELLIGIBLE) said he spoke out against this. So now we see he is up to -- he destroyed the peace process and this man has blood on his hands. He is a war criminal. He can't set foot in Belgium, he is a war criminal. He carried out the 1982 massacre in (UNINTELLIGIBLE) and he was found indirectly responsible by the Israeli government.

NEVILLE: OK.

ELKARRA: You have to look...

NEVILLE: I am going to jump in because I have a caller who really wants to jump in here.

Go ahead, caller. From Alabama, go ahead, caller.

CALLER: Hello. Thank you so much for hearing my comments.

I believe that this is a really pertinent issue. And I believe that one reason why it is bubbling over on the college campuses is because, unlike in the general population, we are encouraged to really study the issue, whereas the general population receives a lot of its news from radio, from TV, from TV, which oftentimes is biased.

I agree that terrorism is awful, but I am so glad that, on a whole, the Muslim population on our campuses are standing up, saying that atrocities on both sides happens to be wrong, not just the atrocities that happened to the Israelis. And I wish that -- and I am very glad that they are focusing more on...

NEVILLE: Well, thank you. Thank you for your call.

Don, what are your thoughts?

DON: This gentleman from California mentioned that Ariel Sharon was not a peacemaker. And, it seems to me, in looking at the history -- at least the recent history of the problems there -- Arafat is the only common denominator over the last 30 years. There has been different U.S. presidents, different U.S. groups that have worked there. There's been different Israelis.

NEVILLE: And your point about that is?

DON: Well, I am not sure that Sharon being a peacemaker or not is the issue. Arafat is the one that has been there forever. And the turmoil has continued.

So my question to him would be: Is Arafat pushing peace? Is he behind a real peace plan, or continuing to keep things stirred up with the bombings?

NEVILLE: You are asking that of Basim, the student?

DON: Yes.

NEVILLE: Go ahead, Basim.

ELKARRA: OK. We talk about Arafat and how if he wants peace.

Arafat is locked up in a room in a little bunker under the ground, and you are asking him to stop terrorism. You destroy all his preventative security, you round up all his police force and you tell him to stop terrorism? I mean, it is unbelievable. It's unbelievable what you are calling for. And Sharon is the one who has blood on his hands. He's never been for a peace process. Yasser Arafat signed Oslo. He signed Oslo in 1993. And he has been committed to peace.

And he's said exactly what the Palestinians want: "We want a right of return. Without a right of return, there will be no peace."

NEVILLE: Jessica, your thoughts?

OLEON: And with the right of return, there is no Israel.

So, if the right of Israel -- if Israel has the right to exist as a state, with safe and defensible borders, it is unlikely that that, as a category for peace, is ever going to make peace possible. That does not mean that peace can't happen.

It does mean there needs to be reasonable discussion and dialogue. It means people have to be willing to compromise on an enormous range of issues. And a lot of that compromise began to happen both at Camp David with President Clinton and then again at Taba, which is in the very south of Egypt, Jordan, Israel where they all meet. There was all of this discussion. And it was so close to creating the possibility of the beginning of a real Palestinian state, governed by Palestinians, and an end to virtually all of the Israeli presence in the territories.

And it fell apart. And it did not fall apart because of bad faith on the part of the Israelis. It fell apart because Arafat, at the end of the day, is a terrorist, has always been a terrorist, and will never be able to grow into the kind of statesman that his people need him to be. If we are talking about blood on your hands, there is blood all over the place.

(CROSSTALK)

NEVILLE: Basim, you know, I know this debate can go on and on and on. And I hate to let it end on such a heavy note that is one sided, because that is not what we are here to do. We are definitely being fair here in all of this coverage. But I want to thank you.

And, Jessica, by the way, good luck in rabbinical school.

OLEON: Thanks.

NEVILLE: And, Basim, nice to talk to you, and Jessica. Thank you both for being here with us this afternoon.

ELKARRA: Thank you.

OLEON: Thanks.

NEVILLE: And up next, we are going to switch gears and talk about marriage, OK? So, you want to marry him but he wants you to change your name. Will you keep yours, take his, or become another hyphenated hybrid? What you decide could be more important to him than you think.

We are going to talk about that after the break.

(COMMERCIAL BREAK)

NEVILLE: Welcome back, everybody.

I want to let you know, it is warm in the studio, because we have started this discussion before the break, before we got to this. And it is heated. It is heated. We are going to bring it to you now.

Here's a question: Are you planning a June wedding? Chances are, you talked about whether the bride will change her name. Studies show 90 percent of you will. And that sure flies in the face of what a lot of women think of as a statement of feminist independence. And, apparently, it came as big surprise to sociologists who study American women.

And Sari Locker has been giving relationship advice for a decade. Her latest advice book is called "Sari Says."

It's widely practiced and accepted these days, Sari, as you know, that the women will keep their maiden name. Is that a problem, Sari?

SARI LOCKER, AUTHOR, "SARI SAYS": Well, Arthel, I will tell you that women are the majority of college students today. Half of new doctors and lawyers are women today.

However, when it comes to brides, 90 percent are changing their names. So, what that goes to show is that women are making a name for themselves in the world. Women have equal rights and opportunities. But I think that many women love the traditions of family and of committing to their partner in a marriage in a very traditional way.

NEVILLE: OK, now, can you commit without changing your name?

LOCKER: I think that people can, absolutely.

But let me tell you an interesting tidbit from a recent research study. The Durex Global Sex Survey asked men what attracts them most to women. And only 1 percent said their career. So...

NEVILLE: But wait, wait, wait, wait. Are you assuming that that is the only reason why a woman would keep her name is because of her career?

LOCKER: It's not the only reason. However, most women will say that the reason why they want to keep their name is to assert that career independence.

Now, women today are getting married at far later an age than they used to. About age 26 to 28 is becoming the normal age for marriage. So, by that age, women really have established their careers. And, therefore, what happens to many women is that, when they meet the man they want to marry, they realize they don't mind shifting gears; they don't mind focusing on relationship and family and tradition.

NEVILLE: Let me let Liz speak.

LIZ: I don't think I would change my name. I am 20 years old. And I like my name. And I am going to graduate college with my name. I would like to go on further with school and with my career and with my family, but as myself. And, if a man can do it as himself, then why can't we do it as ourselves?

NEVILLE: Thank you very much.

LOCKER: I agree.

NEVILLE: You agree with that, Sari?

LOCKER: Yes.

And I also think, whether you change your name or keep your name, the most important thing in any good adult relationship is that you learn when to take the "I" and turn that into the "we." That is what we need to know

(CROSSTALK)

NEVILLE: And you're right. I agree with you. But we are not saying here that if you maintain or keep your maiden name that you don't understand this is a union and that you do practice the word "we" and not "I." You shouldn't assume that. And you're not doing that, are you, Sari?

LOCKER: That's right. I agree with you. I am not assuming that.

But I also can't make the assumption that by changing -- a woman changing her name that she is giving up her career identity. If you want me to drop in a little a personal note...

NEVILLE: Go ahead. What's your -- say that again?

LOCKER: This is on a personal note.

I am the author of four books using my name. I am not yet engaged, but I will tell you that, some day, when I get married...

NEVILLE: You will change your name.

LOCKER: I am going to change my name. Yes.

(LAUGHTER)

NEVILLE: I know you will.

Trina, go ahead.

TRINA: Hi.

Well, I did not get married until I was 35. And I will be 40. And my husband is German. And I kept my last name because I married my boss. And I would have lost my identity if I would have taken his name. And I like my name. And that's why I kept it.

NEVILLE: OK, time out. You married the boss?

TRINA: Yes, I married the boss. Cheap labor now.

(LAUGHTER)

TRINA: But I don't think that that makes me any less committed. Because of being older and deciding to get married at a later age, the commitment is little bit stronger. And I do respect my husband a lot. And he respects me for having made my decision to keep my name.

NEVILLE: Thank you very much. Thank you.

LOCKER: That sounds perfect. It really does.

I think the most important lesson is that we all know that we maintain our identities when we enter a marriage. Whether we keep our name or take on his name, you always have to know who you are.

NEVILLE: And, Libby, what do you say about all this?

LIBBY: Well, I have kept my maiden name as my middle name. And I use my married name now. The reason that I did that is because, when I decided to get married, I decided that we were starting our own family unit. And necessarily, I wanted us to have the same last name. Now, in honor of my parents and all that they have done for me, in terms of emotionally, physically, mentally, I wanted to maintain my maiden name as well.

So, for me, it is the perfect compromise. And it also an opportunity to bring the two families together.

LOCKER: I like that. I am all for that.

NEVILLE: Thank you. Thank you very much.

And I want to go up here now to my friend back here in the back row.

And I would like to hear your thoughts, Mr. -- is it Carlisle (ph)?

UNIDENTIFIED MALE: Yes.

NEVILLE: Speak out, sir.

UNIDENTIFIED MALE: Well, I like what she just said, keeping the middle name. My mother always kept her middle name. But a person -- they can keep their last name as far as their career is concerned. But I still think they should go with their husband's name as far anything for family.

NEVILLE: Why is that, sir?

UNIDENTIFIED MALE: Because it is the best thing to do.

NEVILLE: No, why is that, sir?

UNIDENTIFIED MALE: To keep the family together.

NEVILLE: Sir, what did you tell me before we came back on TV just a minute ago? Sir, what did you tell me? You said because it shows that the woman respects the man.

UNIDENTIFIED MALE: It does.

NEVILLE: He has to respect her, too, sir.

UNIDENTIFIED MALE: Exactly. But that is not the way it has been done for centuries. And it should still go on.

NEVILLE: OK, sir, thank you very much, sir.

I just want to let you know, if you are wondering what we are seeing on the screen there, we've got President Bush arriving back at the White House. He was up in Connecticut.

And, Sari Locker, I want to hear some final thoughts for you, and then we are going to switch gears again. LOCKER: As long as women enjoy the rights and opportunities that we have, as long as we all feel good about ourselves and our individual identities, then, even if you change your name to his, you still maintain yourself as a strong, independent woman.

NEVILLE: You're so diplomatic. Thank you very much, Sari.

LOCKER: Thanks for having me. It was great to be here. Thank you, Arthel.

NEVILLE: It was a lot of fun. Thank you very much.

LOCKER: It was fun. Thank you.

NEVILLE: OK, we are going to take a break right now. And then we're going to go skate out of here with the Olympic champions on ice. It's going to be good.

(COMMERCIAL BREAK)

NEVILLE: All right. Welcome back, everybody. And I want you to welcome some amazing athletes to TALKBACK LIVE. They're here on tour with the Champions on Ice. And you'll recognize them all from this year's Winter Olympics.

Say hello to silver medalist Irina Slutskaya. She also won the world championship last month in Nagano. Tim Goebel picked up the bronze at Salt Lake City and came in second at the world championships. And Sasha Cohen is the American who stunned everyone at the Olympics by coming in fourth. She did it again at the world championship. And she's barely 17.

Welcome to all of you. Very nice to see you in person. Now, you probably heard that the former French judge has now accused the French Skating Federation president of trying to get him to fix votes a couple of years ago. How does all of this controversy affect you as a skater?

IRINA SLUTSKAYA, OLYMPIC FIGURE SKATER: You know, my things, I need to skate because I love it. And everything what is going on, I hear the words since maybe some games. But I have fun. I love my job. And I'm happy I can do it. And I'm skating. Judges are judging.

NEVILLE: All right, that's fair.

Tim, your thoughts.

TIMOTHY GOEBEL, OLYMPIC FIGURE SKATER: I feel pretty much the same way. I love to skate. And when I get on the ice to compete, I have a job to do. And I try to do my job as best I can and then leave the judging to the judges. And, hopefully, they do the right thing.

NEVILLE: And, Sasha, do you agree?

SASHA COHEN, OLYMPIC FIGURE SKATER: I think that you can only do what you can do, train hard, skate your best. And then the rest is out of your hands.

NEVILLE: Speaking of training heard, how hard is it to prepare to be an Olympic skater? Give us an idea.

COHEN: It's a lot of commitment, a lot of focus, concentration. And you really have to dedicate a lot of your time to you know what you want to do. And that's every day getting up, going to the rink and putting 100 percent out there.

NEVILLE: Yes, but how many hours do you practice a day?

SLUTSKAYA: It depends what time is the season. If this is summertime, I practice a lot. It can be five hours on the ice and practice out of the ice. But when it starts season, it takes maybe a couple hours on the ice. But I practice off the ice, too.

NEVILLE: What do you do when you practice off the ice?

SLUTSKAYA: Well, it's choreography and it's jump class. It's like a gym. I'm running, jumping. And I do ballet on the floor and I make my programs on the floor. It's hard work. Nobody can see this, but this is hard work.

NEVILLE: Of course.

And then, not to mention, I'm sure you have a whole 'nother regimen, don't you, Tim?

GOEBEL: I do. I do a little bit different. I do a lot of pilates, which is a sort -- it works strength training as well as stretching at the same time. So, I do that both in a gym and also on my own. So, I usually spend, during competition season, like six hours a day training.

NEVILLE: That's a lot of work.

You are all so cute. I have to take a break now, but just stay right here. They are all cute as a button.

We are going to take a break and come back and talk to the skaters. Don't go anywhere.

(COMMERCIAL BREAK)

NEVILLE: And welcome back.

We are talking to some of the world's greatest skaters in town with the Champions on Ice show.

And, Irina Slutskaya -- I have been practicing your name. Even when you were skating, I was like, "OK, how do you say it?" I got it: Slutskaya. Pretty good, huh?

SLUTSKAYA: Yes. It's nice.

NEVILLE: All right, well, anyway. (LAUGHTER)

NEVILLE: Someone wanted to know -- a caller called in and wanted to know if the Russians gave you the gold when you got back home.

SLUTSKAYA: I was happy when I have gold. So, it's nice.

NEVILLE: OK. OK. And some other audience questions. What do you do when you are not skating?

Tim, you want to take that first?

GOEBEL: Well, this year, I haven't really done anything outside of skating, because of Olympic year. But, hopefully, next summer or next fall, I am going to go back to college.

NEVILLE: Good. Have you already started?

GOEBEL: I have a few classes in at Loyola Marymount in California.

NEVILLE: Yes, OK.

And, Sasha -- because Tim mentioned how, when you are preparing for the Olympics, there is no free time. Do you miss a lot of events like your mom's birthday, I don't know, girlfriend's birthday, different things like that?

COHEN: It can be hard. After your whole competitive season, we're touring for a couple months. And it is hard not to be home. But it is a different lifestyle. You get used to it. It's got pluses and minuses. And I really enjoy it. But I will be excited when I get to go home and spend some time with my family and friends.

NEVILLE: And I forgot. Where is home again?

COHEN: California, Orange County.

NEVILLE: OK, so, now, you just made 17 recently. So you have already done the whole high school thing. Are you finished with high school yet?

COHEN: I am trying to graduate by June this year. I've been taking homework with me, doing it on the bus back and forth.

NEVILLE: Are you going to go to the prom?

COHEN: I want to.

NEVILLE: Do you have a date?

COHEN: Not yet.

NEVILLE: You can pick anybody you want.

Irina Slutskaya, Tim Goebel, Sasha Cohen, thank you so much. And you guys are great. Congratulations to you for all your success. And tiny things, you. You're just little tiny things. Thank you so much.

GOEBEL: Thank you.

(LAUGHTER)

NEVILLE: OK, that's it, everybody. I'm Arthel Neville. I'll see you again tomorrow at 3:00 Eastern with more TALKBACK LIVE.

TO ORDER A VIDEO OF THIS TRANSCRIPT, PLEASE CALL 800-CNN-NEWS OR USE OUR SECURE ONLINE ORDER FORM LOCATED AT www.fdch.com