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American Morning

Interview With Chastity Bono

Aired June 11, 2002 - 09:41   ET

THIS IS A RUSH TRANSCRIPT. THIS COPY MAY NOT BE IN ITS FINAL FORM AND MAY BE UPDATED.

THIS IS A RUSH TRANSCRIPT. THIS COPY MAY NOT BE IN ITS FINAL FORM AND MAY BE UPDATED.
PAULA ZAHN, CNN ANCHOR: She had her first coming out as a 2- year-old, helping her parents, Sonny and Cher, sign off at the end of their TV variety show.

(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)

SONNY BONO, ENTERTAINER: And here's our own very special guests.

CHER: Tonight and every night.

BONO: Our little girl Chastity. Say good night. Now is the time.

CHASTITY BONO, AUTHOR, "THE END OF INNOCENCE": Good night, everybody. God bless you.

(END VIDEO CLIP)

ZAHN: And as Chastity Bono grew from a little girl into a young woman, she revealed she was gay. Chastity's role as an advocate for gay and lesbian rights was inspired by the death of her lover, and she has now written a memoir of their time together. It's called "The End of Innocence." And Chastity Bono joins us now.

Good to see you. Congratulations.

BONO: Thank you.

ZAHN: Well, you really love writing, don't you. It's the second book you've written.

BONO: Yes, I enjoy it. I mean, the actual process of sitting down and writing can be difficult, but I love the result of it. And I like, you know, being able to get my opinions, or stories or whatever I want out there, and it's a good way to do it.

ZAHN: And you have a lot to say in "The End of Innocence." And before people can understand Joan's story, I think they need to understand a little bit more about you and your own sense of sexuality. At what point in your life did you realize you were gay?

BONO: I realized I was gay when I was 13. And I had always felt different. I was never attracted to boys. I had crushes on girls and women my whole life. But I wasn't able to actually call and find the word for it until I was 13.

ZAHN: And at what point did you decide to share that news with your parents?

BONO: Eighteen.

ZAHN: And how did that work?

BONO: I told my dad, and then my mom kind of figured it out, and actually called him, and he confirmed that for her.

ZAHN: And it is true that she had a more hostile reaction than he did?

BONO: Yes, he was great about it. He didn't have a difficult time at all with it. She had an initially difficult time with it, and then, you know, very quickly was able to come around. But it was hard for her, because really, by that time, she was the last person to find out. So, you know, I think that played a part in what she was going through as well.

ZAHN: So you kept it a secret from 13-18, and then your parents knew, and you still wanted to live under the radar, but then someone tipped off the tabloids that you were gay? How much did that hurt?

BONO: I was outed in 1990. It was difficult, because at that time, I was trying to have a career in the music industry, which is also in this book, that whole kind of -- my adventures as a recording artist. And in 1990, nobody was out yet, Melissa Etheridge, K.D. Lang. So everybody kind of thought that it would kill your career. And so it was -- I was just afraid more than anything else, that here I had already been working for about three years, putting together a band, and writing songs, and doing all that work. I had just got signed to development deal at Geffen Records and this came out.

ZAHN: Did you think the gay community used you?

BONO: At that time? No, not really. I mean, it was a weird time in the community, because there was outing movement going on, and I knew that this story came out of the community. And there was even a magazine at that time called "OutWeek," which doesn't exist any more, but did a story on me and the fact that I wasn't coming out after being outed and blah, blah, blah. So I guess I was resentful at certain aspects of the community at that time. I didn't feel used by them, no.

ZAHN: And then later, when you become gay activist, isn't it true then that you were dissed by them one you said Ellen Degeneres' show was too gay for mainstream America.

BONO: I got static, you know, but what I said was taken completely out of context, and so it didn't come out exactly the way that I meant it. And you know, it was interesting, because I got a lot of static about that from different people in the community. And I got a lot of people saying you're absolutely right, and then as time went on, it was pretty much you're absolutely right, so you know. ZAHN: You talk about so many different things in the book, but really the essence of the book at the core is your relationship with Joan, who is 20 years older than you, and a friend of your mother's at one time. She led an interesting life.

BONO: Very.

ZAHN: Before she was involved with you, was taken care of by a very wealthy man, who had a pretty significant relationship with her?

BONO: Yes. It's -- you know, it was an interesting thing. I mean, I had known that about Joan ever since I was a little kid, and that was a choice that she made, you know, to see a man. You know, I think she saw him twice a year for two weeks at a time and he took care of her, and he was married, and that was the arrangement that they had. And certainly not a choice I would make, but I never judged her about it, and that was long over by the time we had gotten together. It's not something -- I couldn't be in relationship with somebody that was seeing somebody else on a regular basis. That wouldn't work for me, even if it was just, you know, for money.

ZAHN: You write quite openly about the tragedy of her suffering from cancer and the tailspin that sent you into, and then later where you become addicted to some of the same medicines that were around the house at the time that she was suffering? What did you learn from that experience?

BONO: Well, I think that, you know, taking care of her was -- turned out to be something that was really good for me, and I think helped to really boost my confidence. You know, before that, I was a pretty insecure person, and Joan got deathly ill, and I never thought about it; it was just, OK, she's sick, let's take care of it, let's deal with it. And at a certain time, I started to look around me and all of the friends and really close people that I thought would be right in the trenches there with us where just gone. And so I think that, you know, it kind of hit me at some point that I am kind of doing something significant that not everybody can do. So that was kind of the positive thing I took out of it.

There were a lot of negative things as well. I, you know, was very depressed for many years after it and very embittered and, you know, felt like I was really cheated, because we only had about 10 really good months together, and they were really, really good, you know.

ZAHN: Well, we congratulate you on "The End of Innocence." Your mom's getting read to go on the road. Is this really it for her, the last road trip?

BONO: Somebody just asked me that. She thinks it is, so I -- you know.

ZAHN: Will you be there?

BONO: I've already got my tickets reserved for the L.A. show, so absolutely. ZAHN: Good. I'm a big Cher fan. Go, Cher, go.

Chastity, again, thanks for dropping by AMERICAN MORNING.

ZAHN: Thank you for having me.

BONO: Appreciate your time.

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