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CNN LARRY KING LIVE

Interview With Jerry Seinfeld; Interview With Martha Stewart

Aired December 25, 2005 - 20:00   ET

THIS IS A RUSH TRANSCRIPT. THIS COPY MAY NOT BE IN ITS FINAL FORM AND MAY BE UPDATED.


(NEWSBREAK)
LARRY KING, HOST: Happy holidays. Welcome back to the King size Christmas marathon, our best shows of 2005.

Jerry Seinfeld and Martha Stewart in the same hour -- not bad, folks. And it happened right before Thanksgiving. Enjoy.

(BEGIN VIDEOTAPE)

Tonight, a live primetime exclusive with Jerry Seinfeld, a rare one-on-one with one of the funniest guys around.

Plus, the diva of domesticity, Martha Stewart; Seinfeld and Stewart and your phone calls.

JERRY SEINFELD, COMEDIAN: Don't mix them up.

KING: You figure it out next on LARRY KING LIVE.

SEINFELD: My whole ambition for this show -- oh, go ahead Larry.

KING: I think we're on. Yes, we are on.

SEINFELD: Do your opening Larry.

KING: That's it. I did it.

SEINFELD: Yes, oh, OK.

KING: Seinfeld is with us, the start of the Emmy winning TV sitcom, the fifth and sixth seasons of "Seinfeld" have just been released on DVD. How you didn't notice would escape me beyond belief because it was in every newspaper in the world today, full page ads. Jerry will appear next at Caesar's Palace on December 26th and 27th.

SEINFELD: Like you don't promote.

KING: That's what you're here for. I'm here to promote you.

SEINFELD: Yes. Well, I'm really here to see you.

KING: Nice to see you.

SEINFELD: To catch up, to talk. This is more -- this is more of a Thanksgiving thing to me.

KING: Oh, I see, be nice.

SEINFELD: You know you want to -- I don't have relatives like, you know, so you're like seeing my relatives, you know.

KING: Once in a while you drop by.

SEINFELD: Yes.

KING: I'm honored that you're here and I'm honored to be in your movie, a B movie which is coming...

SEINFELD: Yes, Larry...

KING: ...Larry B. King (ph).

SEINFELD: Larry King is in my movie. It's a movie about bees and we were writing the movie about bees and we thought, well, there should be a Larry King. We thought in any conceivable universe would have some sort of Larry King in it. So then we were going to make up a Larry King and we said, no, let's just make it be Larry King.

KING: That's a great -- two great scenes, both with you.

SEINFELD: Yes. Yes, both with me and you were very good.

KING: And you're a very good -- you're a very good director and I was funny.

SEINFELD: Thank you. You were funny.

KING: When is it coming? Why is it taking so long?

SEINFELD: Because it's a cartoon and it takes a long time. It's, you know, it's like "Shrek" and you got to, you know, it's complicated and it's expensive and we want you to look good.

KING: Are you enjoying it?

SEINFELD: Very much. I love it. I love Jeffrey Katzenberg and all the DreamWorks people are great and I'm really enjoying it. It's a long process but I'm enjoying it.

KING: Now tell me about this DVD boxed set. We know that one is season six and season seven.

SEINFELD: Yes.

KING: But what is in this creation?

SEINFELD: Well, this is a tiny, tiny, puffy shirt. The people that liked the puffy shirt but thought it was too big, so we made it tiny and you can have it.

KING: That comes with the boxed set.

SEINFELD: Yes, and also this is the other thing that was -- this is in a...

KING: This looks like QVC doesn't it? What else Jerry? What else is in that set?

SEINFELD: That's not all you get. You get the (INAUDIBLE). This is a script that I wrote that Larry David and I wrote together and it's my handwritten notes. Can you see this?

KING: This is for real?

SEINFELD: This is the exact -- it's miniaturized but and there's a lot of stuff in there that was not in the show and that's so you can see how we wrote the show.

KING: Crossed out a lot of things. I watch you work.

SEINFELD: Yes.

KING: You cross and write and cross and write.

SEINFELD: Right and I -- I cross out so you can still read what used to be there. So, that's just some of the (INAUDIBLE).

KING: What a great idea.

SEINFELD: I didn't come up with this stuff. My genius manager, Howard West, who conceived of this entire DVD thing when they were just going to put the shows out he said, no, we got to do more than that. There's an animated -- they did animation. They took scenes and animated them in here.

KING: Why do you think DVD got so big?

SEINFELD: They're thin. That's it

KING: And they make more than movies right? This could make you more than the TV show made.

SEINFELD: Oh, Larry, let's not quibble over money.

KING: No, I'm very happy.

SEINFELD: You don't have to put it back.

KING: OK, I'm just trying to do it right.

SEINFELD: This is really like being with your relatives.

KING: I'm very -- I'm very happy for you Jerry.

SEINFELD: Thank you.

KING: Do you miss doing the show?

SEINFELD: Certain parts of it, you know, I miss being on the stage with the gang, you know, and we would make up stuff sometimes and laugh and I miss writing with Larry. And there was a -- we had a great feeling together. We really all thought we were, you know, we enjoyed each other's humor.

KING: What don't you miss?

SEINFELD: It was very difficult, you know. The workload was, you know, heavy.

KING: Why did that show work because it was about nothing? It really was.

SEINFELD: Well, I don't know what that means. What does that mean to say it was about nothing? There's nothing about nothing that anybody wants to watch. It was just that we did not restrict ourselves to anything.

KING: Slice of life. Everything is a slice of life.

SEINFELD: What's not a slice of life? This is a slice of life.

KING: Yes, right. So, what was...

SEINFELD: Why was the show so successful?

KING: Yes.

SEINFELD: I'll give you the same answer Gleason would always give when they asked him this question about "The Honeymooners." It's funny, funny. And, you know what people say they were always surprised that the show, the subject matter worked for broad America and it wasn't the subjects. It was the funny. Funny translates.

KING: (INAUDIBLE) is funny.

SEINFELD: Funny translates to every language, every demographic.

KING: It wasn't a hit immediately right?

SEINFELD: No, not for four years. These were the first two hit seasons.

KING: Six and seven?

SEINFELD: Five and six.

KING: Five and six.

SEINFELD: We were not a hit for four years.

KING: Why did they keep it on?

SEINFELD: We had a small loyal group that stuck with us.

KING: So, why did the network keep it?

SEINFELD: That was the group. They were the ones watching it. KING: Bow ties.

SEINFELD: The network was watching it, yes.

KING: The suits liked you.

SEINFELD: Yes.

KING: No, really thought that would not happen today to let a show...

SEINFELD: Ah, to be honest with you it was a desirable demographic. It was a spending group whatever that means. I don't even know.

KING: Eighteen to 45 or whatever.

SEINFELD: Yes, whatever it is. They understand. They analyze these things. And we had that group watching us so that kept us on.

KING: Were you shocked when they...

SEINFELD: Shocked. Oh, go ahead.

KING: When they voted for the 50 greatest TV shows of all time and "Seinfeld" won?

SEINFELD: Yes, that was...

KING: I mean come on that had to blow your mind.

SEINFELD: ...that was a little overwhelming. Yes, that blew my mind. That blew my mind. That I really couldn't -- I was a little embarrassed. Too much that's embarrassing.

KING: You also include a DVD extra called Signamation (ph).

SEINFELD: Yes, the animation. I talked about that. You're not listening to me, Larry.

KING: You talked about doing animation on the DVD?

SEINFELD: It's on the DVD.

KING: On this DVD?

SEINFELD: It's on the DVD.

KING: Animation.

SEINFELD: Animation.

KING: Of?

SEINFELD: The DVD.

KING: No, no.

SEINFELD: No, we took some scenes from the series, my television series.

KING: "Seinfeld."

SEINFELD: "Seinfeld" and we animated them. It's a cartoon.

KING: For what reason?

SEINFELD: No reason.

KING: Just to do it right?

SEINFELD: Yes. It's funny. There were scenes where we described things that had happened to us and we didn't have the money to go out on the set and actually do it and they took scenes like that and they create what you would have seen.

KING: You realize this is going to be a blockbuster sale?

SEINFELD: I realize nothing.

KING: Christmas, good time release, come on.

SEINFELD: You think?

KING: Come on, Jer.

SEINFELD: Taking the chance.

KING: Jerry.

SEINFELD: Taking a big chance here.

KING: When did we shoot the scenes for B movie?

SEINFELD: Two months ago.

KING: Three months ago.

SEINFELD: Three months ago.

KING: Maybe four months ago, OK, and I said to you, "Will you come on the show sometime soon?"

SEINFELD: Yes.

KING: November 22nd. Now why did it time out Jerry?

SEINFELD: I don't know.

KING: To November 22nd?

SEINFELD: It's a miracle of modern merchandising.

KING: This is going to work.

SEINFELD: This should somehow become available when people need presents.

KING: Now, you're at Caesar's Palace. By the way, you just received HBO's inaugural comedian award.

SEINFELD: Thank you.

KING: In Vegas. I was there for the founders, the older comics. What was it like for you?

SEINFELD: It was great. I was there with Chris Rock and Gary Shandling and Robert Klein and Anderson Cooper moderated and we were really funny. They're talking about putting that on TV now because it was a great hour of -- a discussion about comedy.

You never see anything about stand up that really explores it I think in a, you know, interesting way and these guys, it was just murderer's row up there and people were just killing the audience.

KING: You still do it right stand up?

SEINFELD: Oh, yes, all the time. I love it.

KING: You'll be at Caesar's.

SEINFELD: Yes.

KING: Do you work Vegas a lot?

SEINFELD: I work Vegas at Caesar's Palace three times a year. I'm there the 26th and 27th this time.

KING: Do you do concerts?

SEINFELD: Concerts, performances, anything you want to call them.

KING: Is that still your favorite?

SEINFELD: Yes.

KING: Why?

SEINFELD: There's no BS with it, you know what I mean. You just got to get up there...

KING: You can't fake it.

SEINFELD: ...and you can't fake it. You cannot fake it. You're either doing it or you're not doing it and everything else in show business almost can be faked. You could take somebody that has never acted before, right, and you see it and they put him in the movie and the guy is brilliant. You can't -- you don't do that in stand up. Do you think you're funny? Let's see.

KING: Do you have, I asked Bob Hope once, do you have an edge because you're Bob Hope and he said for about a minute.

SEINFELD: About a minute that is exactly right.

KING: They like you and they know you so they give you the minute.

SEINFELD: Nobody laughs at a reputation. If you're funny you got to be funny now.

KING: Seasons five and six are out, a great packaging job for "Seinfeld," there's animation surprises, a jack-in-the-box, and there's Cracker Jack's come with it.

SEINFELD: What? What?

KING: I'm adding on. I'm just trying to...

SEINFELD: What is going on here?

KING: We'll be right back. We'll take calls for Seinfeld.

SEINFELD: No ad-libbing please.

KING: We'll be right back with Jerry Seinfeld; later, Martha Stewart. I don't know why that sounds funny to me. We'll be right back.

SEINFELD: I'll tell you when we come back.

KING: OK.

(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)

SEINFELD: I agreed to wear this?

UNIDENTIFIED MALE: Yes.

UNIDENTIFIED MALE: Yes.

SEINFELD: But when did I do that?

UNIDENTIFIED MALE: When we went to dinner the other night.

SEINFELD: What are you crazy?

UNIDENTIFIED MALE: What were you talking about when I went to the bathroom?

SEINFELD: I don't know. I couldn't understand a word she was saying. I was just nodding.

UNIDENTIFIED MALE: There you go.

SEINFELD: Where I go? You mean she was asking me to wear this ridiculous shirt on national TV and I said yes?

UNIDENTIFIED MALE: Yes. Yes, you said it.

SEINFELD: But I didn't know what she was talking about. I couldn't hear her.

UNIDENTIFIED MALE: Well, she asked you.

SEINFELD: I can't wear this puffy shirt on TV. I mean look at it. It looks ridiculous.

UNIDENTIFIED MALE: Well you got to wear it now. All those stores are stocking it based on the condition that you're going to wear this on the TV show. The factory in New Jersey is already making them.

SEINFELD: They're making these?

(END VIDEO CLIP)

(COMMERCIAL BREAK)

(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)

GEORGE: They're breaking up? How do you know?

SEINFELD: She reads lips.

GEORGE: She could come to the party tomorrow and read Gwen's lips for me.

SEINFELD: What?

GEORGE: We bring her to the party and she tells me what Gwen is saying about me.

SEINFELD: She's not a novelty act, George that you hire out for weddings and Bar Mitzvahs.

GEORGE: It's a skill just like juggling. She probably enjoys showing it off.

SEINFELD: I don't know George. I'm not sure about that.

(END VIDEO CLIP)

KING: It's hard not to laugh.

SEINFELD: It's pretty funny.

KING: How did you not laugh doing it?

SEINFELD: I did.

KING: Oh, you did a lot of break ups?

SEINFELD: Oh, me I broke up all the time. I was a big fan of the show.

KING: It was funny.

SEINFELD: And you could see on my face if you watch you could see my mouth I'm laughing all the time. I'm thinking this is a wonderful episode.

KING: You are a collector, Jer. You collect the clocks from LARRY KING LIVE.

SEINFELD: Yes.

KING: You have stolen many.

SEINFELD: Yes.

KING: You collect cars.

SEINFELD: Yes.

KING: How many cars you have?

SEINFELD: A few.

KING: You got a garage full right?

SEINFELD: A garage full, yes love the cars. Do you know why I love cars?

KING: Why?

SEINFELD: Not to get off the subject.

KING: That was the subject I just asked about.

SEINFELD: Oh. I love cars because when you're driving you're outside and you're inside and you're moving and you're still all at the same time. These are the things I work on Larry.

KING: That's profound.

SEINFELD: Yes.

KING: You're outside and you're inside.

SEINFELD: And you're inside. And you're moving.

KING: And you're still.

SEINFELD: All at the same time. How can you beat that?

KING: That's wonderful.

SEINFELD: Yes. KING: You also collect, you've never worn this, he's worn it tonight, folks I want you to see something if we can get a shot of this on camera.

SEINFELD: You got it?

KING: That is a beautiful pair of cufflinks. In diamond it says 100.

SEINFELD: See the initials it's GB.

KING: On top, GB, George Burns' cufflinks.

SEINFELD: Yes, I acquired them through an unnamed source.

KING: An estate sale like?

SEINFELD: Something like that.

KING: You were a fan of his?

SEINFELD: A huge fan, still. He's kind of like my guiding light of how to enjoy show business and life. I read -- I've read his books. I like his whole philosophy of life of just -- I find a lot of people -- to me the saddest thing is show business is like this amazing business if you can survive in it and there are so many people that do and are not enjoying it and that always seemed like a crime to me. And he always had that thing he enjoyed it. When he was up, when he was down, he just knew how to make life fun.

KING: Are there a lot of comics who don't enjoy it?

SEINFELD: There's a lot of people that don't enjoy it in anything. Don't you find that?

KING: I thought you like a business you're in like television. I love television.

SEINFELD: Me too.

KING: What's not to love?

SEINFELD: What's not to love? We're on television right now.

KING: They pay you for this.

SEINFELD: Yes.

KING: And it's a joke.

SEINFELD: Yes.

KING: Right?

SEINFELD: They could turn off the cameras and we'd keep talking.

KING: That's right.

SEINFELD: Yes.

KING: We don't know. No, what I mean is why would you not -- but we know the stories of the, you know...

SEINFELD: People, I don't know.

KING: Pagliacci and...

SEINFELD: It's a very difficult thing to get into and you should enjoy it if you're in it. That's what I like about you. You're enjoying it right?

KING: Oh, I love it.

SEINFELD: People feel that.

KING: Is it hard to do stand up when you've had a bad day?

SEINFELD: No.

KING: Really?

SEINFELD: No, it's actually easier because when you get on that stage it's like you're not -- you're like on a planet. It's like another planet and you can just suddenly connect with these strangers and they connect with you and it's like you're -- it's like this very intimate anonymous connection that you really don't have in any other art form because you're facing them.

You're talking to them and they're responding right to you. It's very close and yet you're total strangers. So, it just takes you away from the world. It could be the best thing after a bad day.

KING: And there's no bigger high than the laugh right?

SEINFELD: Well, I don't want to get into personal things here but...

KING: What's bigger?

SEINFELD: Making your kids laugh. When my kids laugh that's even better. Those laughs with those -- with like two teeth I mean there's nothing like that to me.

KING: What's fatherhood done to you?

SEINFELD: Ah, you know, it's...

KING: Changed you.

SEINFELD: It's a little embarrassing frankly.

KING: Embarrassing? SEINFELD: It's embarrassing that it took me so long to realize that, you know, there's something going on here with having kids, you know, because I was single. I was -- I was Bill Maher. You know Bill Maher.

KING: Know him know him.

SEINFELD: Bill Maher thinks, you know, he's got it made. He thinks he's got it -- he thinks he's got the racket beat. He doesn't know. So and I was like that. I was one of those guys, you know.

KING: Oh, yes confirmed like...

SEINFELD: Oh, sure. But it was, you know, I was single until I was 45 and it was like 25 years of acting fascinated. I just couldn't do it anymore.

KING: The joy of having them huh?

SEINFELD: It's like the greatest thing. You just don't know. I mean some guys seem to know younger but it took me a while.

KING: When did you know you were funny? Were you a class clown?

SEINFELD: Yes, I was funny to my friends when I was a kid but to make strangers laugh you don't know. I never thought I could do that. I never knew if I could do that.

KING: First time you got paid?

SEINFELD: First time I got paid was at a place called was it -- it was on Third Avenue and 33rd Street. It was owned by a guy named Rico, $25. He said, "You got to do two different shows, 25 minutes each." And I had 20 minutes all together. I said "I'll do it." So, I went up. I did my 20 minutes. In the second show I did Larry King.

KING: But the bug was bit.

SEINFELD: Yes, first laugh.

KING: We'll be right back and take some calls for Jerry Seinfeld. We now have out season five and season six with bonus features, packed with hours of never-before-seen footage. I love this, all new interviews with the cast and the creators available now for Christmas. Was that good? Did I do that good?

SEINFELD: That's very nice. You would think you were getting a piece of it.

KING: And I know I'm not. Tomorrow night Supreme Court Justice Stephen Breyer, how do you like that, one night you, last night Bob Woodward and tomorrow night a justice of the Supreme Court.

SEINFELD: So what -- and the theme is?

KING: The company you keep. SEINFELD: OK.

KING: We'll be right back. Don't go away.

(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)

UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: You painted your face?

UNIDENTIFIED MALE: Yes.

UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: Why?

UNIDENTIFIED MALE: Oh, you know, support the team.

UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: Well you can't walk around like that.

UNIDENTIFIED MALE: Why not?

UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: Because it's insane.

UNIDENTIFIED MALE: Well, you got to let them know you were out there. This is the playoffs. Yes.

UNIDENTIFIED MALE: Hey.

UNIDENTIFIED MALE: Hi.

UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: Dave painted his face.

UNIDENTIFIED MALE: Oh, yes, you know, that's cool. Well you got to support your team.

UNIDENTIFIED MALE: OK, ready to go?

UNIDENTIFIED MALE: Yes.

UNIDENTIFIED MALE: Let's get it on, all right.

(END VIDEO CLIP)

(COMMERCIAL BREAK)

(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)

UNIDENTIFIED MALE: Do women know about shrinkage?

UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: What do you mean like laundry?

UNIDENTIFIED MALE: No.

SEINFELD: Like when a man goes swimming afterwards.

UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: It shrinks?

SEINFELD: Like a frightened turtle.

UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: Why does it shrink?

UNIDENTIFIED MALE: It just does.

UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: I don't know how you guys walk around with those things.

(END VIDEO CLIP)

KING: That's funny stuff.

SEINFELD: Now you may notice my collar is different in this segment.

KING: Why? How come, Jer?

SEINFELD: My wife called and didn't like how it looked.

KING: So all that you said immaterial?

SEINFELD: It doesn't matter.

KING: The witticisms, the promotion of this...

SEINFELD: My wife is a detail person and she, I hope you like it now honey. I'm wearing this tie. What do you think of this? I put on a whole tie for an inch here. What a waste of a tie.

KING: It's a nice look, Jer.

SEINFELD: Thank you.

KING: It's a nice look. By the way, someone said that I said Justice Stephen Berger. I know Warren Berger. It's Justice Stephen Breyer. I don't think I said Berger.

SEINFELD: No.

KING: No, I didn't.

SEINFELD: Breyer, Berger.

KING: It's Breyer.

SEINFELD: It's Breyer.

KING: OK.

SEINFELD: And, yes, you need a theme for these shows. You can't just jump around.

KING: Let's take a call. You'll figure out one for me before we -- Lansing, Michigan for Jerry Seinfeld, hello.

CALLER FROM LANSING, MICHIGAN: Hi, Larry, hi Jerry.

SEINFELD: Hi, Lansing. CALLER: I've been a great fan for many years. I've seen you several times in Michigan. But I was just wondering what was your favorite episode?

SEINFELD: Oh, my favorite episode. One of my favorites, I don't have a favorite favorite. One of my favorites is in this pack the marine biologist where Kramer hits the golf ball into the blow hole of the whale and George finds it (INAUDIBLE). That's one of my favorites. I have a lot of favorites.

KING: Did you select the cast?

SEINFELD: Yes, I did. Larry and I worked together but these were really the -- you know there was no contest with any of them.

KING: No, because Rosie O'Donnell told Bob Costas, Bob sat in for me the other night, that she auditioned.

SEINFELD: She did but that doesn't mean...

KING: That she'd get it?

SEINFELD: Yes. Julia, you know it was once Julia read for it that was it. Once Jason read that was it, once Michael same thing.

KING: Right as soon as you saw them?

SEINFELD: Yes, that's it.

KING: Dolthan, Alabama, hello.

CALLER: Hi Jerry, hi Larry.

KING: Hi.

SEINFELD: Hi.

CALLER: Hi. My whole entire family is a big fan of the show.

SEINFELD: Oh, thank you.

CALLER: And I was wondering -- oh, you're welcome. I was wondering...

SEINFELD: Oh, that's all right.

CALLER: ...if you can -- I was wondering if you plan on being in any sitcoms in the future?

SEINFELD: No.

KING: Because? Can't top this?

SEINFELD: How am I going to beat this? Why would I? It's awful when -- it's like, you know, when athletes come out of retirement for that last couple years and it's like not as... KING: The last hoorah doesn't...

SEINFELD: Not good. This is as good as I could ever -- I never could get this kind of good fortune, these stars. This was magic. The stars just lined up. I didn't make this happen. It just happened. It was like being in a tornado.

KING: You can't plan chemistry.

SEINFELD: No, you cannot plan it.

KING: Braintree, Massachusetts, hello.

SEINFELD: Braintree.

KING: Hello.

CALLER: Hi, Jerry.

SEINFELD: Hi, Brain.

CALLER: I was wondering why didn't you invite Jason Alexander to your wedding?

SEINFELD: I had -- I hate big weddings so I had the smallest possible wedding I could have. I didn't invite most of my friends. I had I think...

KING: How many people?

SEINFELD: Twenty people just relatives, just the real, you know, the core. I don't like...

KING: None of the cast?

SEINFELD: No, no. I don't -- nobody wants to go to a wedding. I did a whole routine on "The Tonight Show" about this a couple nights ago. Don't you hate when you see somebody on a show promoting something and then you see him again. Like I did the "Today Show" this morning and I hate when you hear them do the same lines on another show. So, I'm not going to do the wedding stuff.

KING: OK but you don't like...

SEINFELD: But I hate weddings. I want to be married not get married.

KING: Did they understand the friends?

SEINFELD: You'll have to ask them that.

KING: Because they haven't spoken to you since.

SEINFELD: Sure, yes, nobody wants to go to these awful things and eat that bad food.

KING: What keeps -- all right, you're doing the B movie.

SEINFELD: Yes.

KING: What keeps and I'm honored again to be in it, what keeps you going? You got all the money you're ever going to need.

SEINFELD: (INAUDIBLE).

KING: Yes, you do. Seinfeld is an enormous hit.

SEINFELD: Yes.

KING: You're still a young man.

SEINFELD: What am I doing on this show? What the hell am I doing here?

KING: You got a good point. What's your drive?

SEINFELD: Good night, everybody.

KING: No, what's your drive?

SEINFELD: What's my drive?

KING: Yes, what drives you other than the cars?

SEINFELD: Good Larry King -- there's a Larry King question.

KING: Yes. It makes you think.

SEINFELD: The drive is to use what you have, you know. It takes a long time to build up these things. I don't take it for granted that I can do this that I can get on a stage or I can perform or anything I can do. And when you have these hard one skills you got to use them or you lose them. It's the same with the brain, the body, everything. The whole human experience is really use it or lose it. There's no better example of this than you and your hair.

KING: My hair?

SEINFELD: Yes. Your hair never stops growing.

KING: It's the same hair I've always had.

SEINFELD: Yes but it grows fast. Every other show you need a haircut.

KING: You're an observer aren't you?

SEINFELD: Yes.

KING: You are a television watcher aren't you?

SEINFELD: Doesn't your hair grow fast?

KING: I never thought of it. I guess it does.

SEINFELD: It does. I've noticed. He needs a haircut again, whenever I'm watching at home.

KING: OK. Well, Jer.

SEINFELD: That's it.

KING: Well, your people said only a half hour. They put the clamps on us and we have to live by that.

SEINFELD: These people know what they're doing.

KING: I'm looking forward to...

SEINFELD: They put me in this outfit.

KING: I'm looking forward to the B movie.

SEINFELD: Thank you.

KING: And I thank you and I hope this does very well.

SEINFELD: Thank you for being so kind and for promoting it.

KING: Not that you need it, seasons five and six and the whole thing.

SEINFELD: Yes, added features.

KING: Added features. You're not going to do that again are you?

SEINFELD: What that?

KING: The clock?

SEINFELD: No.

KING: Every time just a little thing before he -- don't. Jerry Seinfeld he's appeared on this show I guess this is his fifth time has always stolen our little clock. The clock is kind of a prop because we do have digits.

SEINFELD: Can you believe that this, get a shot of this piece of junk here, what do you think this costs?

KING: I have no idea.

SEINFELD: Look at this. This is CNN. It's not even a new one. This thing -- do you take this in your luggage?

KING: No, we have one in L.A., one in Washington and one here.

SEINFELD: Oh, boy what a budget.

KING: Are you going to take it again?

SEINFELD: It's not even worth it to take anymore because you told me how much money I have. I think I'll get my own.

KING: OK, because you used to love taking it.

SEINFELD: Yes.

KING: Now I think I'm disappointed that you didn't take it. Thanks, Jer.

SEINFELD: Thanks, Larry.

KING: Jerry Seinfeld. He meets Martha Stewart, there she is.

SEINFELD: Wow.

KING: Wow.

SEINFELD: Martha Stewart.

KING: We'll be right back with Martha. This is some (INAUDIBLE) tonight don't go away.

(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)

SEINFELD: You faked with me?

UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: Yes.

SEINFELD: You faked with me?

UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: Yes.

SEINFELD: No.

UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: Yes.

SEINFELD: You faked it?

UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: I faked it.

SEINFELD: That whole thing, the whole production it was all an act?

UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: Not bad, huh?

SEINFELD: What about the breathing, the panting, the moaning, the screaming?

UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: Fake, fake, fake, fake.

SEINFELD: I'm stunned. I'm shocked. How many times did you do this?

UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: All the time. SEINFELD: All the time.

(END VIDEO CLIP)

(COMMERCIAL BREAK)

KING: Who better to have as a guest two days before Thanksgiving than the one and only Martha Stewart?

Martha Stewart is not too much around. Let me go through some of the things and then we'll be out of time and turn it over to Anderson Cooper. Her holiday DVD collection is now available, there you see it. She's the star of the syndicated daytime show "Martha."

"Martha Stewart Living" radio has just launched on Sirius satellite radio. She's the author of the major New York Times best- seller "The Martha Rules." She has "Martha Stewart's Baking Handbook," her first major cookbook since 1999. It's now in bookstores, there you see it.

Even her daughter, Alexis, the beautiful Alexis, is featured in the new issue of "Harper's Bazaar." Alexis is a gorgeous girl and she has appeared on this show. It's called hard act to follow, good title, Nancy Collins, an old friend wrote it. Meet Alexis Stewart.

She's everywhere. How are you, Martha?

MARTHA STEWART, TALK SHOW HOST: I'm fine, I'm just great.

KING: Now that you're out and free?

STEWART: I'm so happy.

KING: Thanksgiving big?

STEWART: It's all catch-up time. Yes.

KING: Where were you last Thanksgiving?

STEWART: Not in a very pleasant place.

KING: Did they have Thanksgiving frolic there?

STEWART: I had visitors, so I missed the turkey.

KING: You did?

STEWART: I did. If you have visitors, you don't get the turkey. But, it's only like three ounces of frozen -- it's roasted, then frozen. And then it might be a year old. And then it's dismembered and then you get it reheated in aluminum foil.

KING: I want to get the bad over with before we get to the good. Donald Trump has put you down a little. I know your show, "The Apprentice," show wraps up in December. Trump said in a radio interview, "there was confusion between Martha's 'Apprentice' and mine. Mine continues to do well, the other has struggled. And I think it probably hurt mine. I sort of predicted that it would."

You laugh, but what do you make of that? Didn't it hurt?

STEWART: That there were two might have been confusing. But if you add them together, they're absolute bombshell. It's fantastic. So, you have to look at it...

KING: .... no, but did what Donald say hurt?

STEWART: Oh, no. Donald's, Donald.

KING: It didn't bother you?

STEWART: Donald's an executive producer of my show.

KING: So why would he knock his own product?

STEWART: Ask Donald.

KING: Have you talked to him?

STEWART: I've talked to him. He says that he didn't say that.

KING: And you believe that. You accept that, rather.

STEWART: It's fine with me.

KING: What happened to your "Apprentice?"

STEWART: Nothing, nothing. My "Apprentice" has been exactly what I thought it would be, after not having been the only "Apprentice." I mean, if you're sharing a marketplace, you share the marketplace.

And I'm very -- I'm pleased with it. We haven't had the finale yet, which is on December 21st. We're excited about choosing the final winner of the job.

KING: Did you say you enjoyed doing it?

STEWART: Oh, I did. I really did.

KING: Will you miss it?

STEWART: No. I had never planned to do more than one season.

KING: Why?

STEWART: I don't have time. Seven weeks of intense 24-hour days and I have a daily show. You know, our daily show.

KING: I know, I've been on it. It was a lot of fun. STEWART: You were the best guest. Everybody loved you. Today, I had Patti LaBelle on. We had a hoot of a time.

KING: Best set I ever saw, your set.

STEWART: Isn't it great? Carly Simon just came on and she'll be there on Friday, and on Monday we have a big reunion show. It's a lot of fun and I think we're building a kind of interest and audience for that daily show that's very valuable. Valuable to our brand, which is unlike "The Apprentice," which although shows people what our company's all about, isn't our -- it didn't originate with us. So, it's fine.

KING: Everything else is your origination?

STEWART: Yes, important.

KING: Did you think while you were in prison, that it would all come to light like this? DVDs, magazines, books, daily show. Did you think that?

STEWART: Before I went to prison, remember, it was all this?

KING: Did you think in prison it would be all this again?

STEWART: Yes.

KING: Really?

STEWART: Yes, I did. We have a great, great consumer. We have a great audience. We have great fans. We have great people that we try to help with our everyday advice, our cooking, our recipes. And that's what we're about. We're teachers. And I've told you that many times, that we are good teachers at "Martha Stewart Living." And have you seen the cookie issue?

KING: The what?

STEWART: The cookie issue.

KING: The cookie issue.

STEWART: Yes, this one. This is our special issue on cookies. It's the most brilliant cookie issue.

KING: Holiday cookies.

STEWART: One hundred recipes.

KING: A special issue.

STEWART: It's on the newsstands now. But, I am so proud of this because the photography is breakthrough.

KING: You made cookies, for me one time.

STEWART: Yes, the recipes are delicious.

KING: Look at that cookie? I like that cookie.

STEWART: They're delicious and it's just an amazingly -- an amazing magazine, unlike any other magazine on the newsstand. That's what we do, Larry, you know that.

KING: Why do we like cookies?

STEWART: They're munchy, they're not too big, usually.

KING: Habit-forming, though.

STEWART: Good.

KING: The good ones.

STEWART: We like habit-forming. We like people to want another cookie. We want them to like that.

KING: Is there a good non-fat, non-sweet cookie?

STEWART: I'm sure there are. We don't make them.

KING: How is "Martha Stewart Living" doing?

STEWART: Very well, very well. Our advertising is coming back really well. And that's where the problem was. Our readers never left, but the advertisers, because of the difficulties, had an obligation, I think, to stand back and wait.

But they're all coming back very, very nicely. I think we have -- advertising will be up over 100 percent in the last quarter. So that's good.

KING: We'll be right back with Martha Stewart. We'll include phone calls for the amazing Ms. Stewart.

Tomorrow night Supreme Court Justice Stephen Breyer will be our special guest. Don't go away.

(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)

STEWART: Ultimately, you will have a beautiful "Boo" on your pumpkin. See? Try that. Now, don't let it slip, because if you let it slip, you ruin the design. I'm just warning you, just warning you.

And there's lot of alternative lighting for the inside of the pumpkins. This little fluorescent light is great, it will last about three hours. So, just about the right time.

BETTE MIDLER, SINGER/ACTRESS: I think I made a boo-boo.

STEWART: Uh oh.

MIDLER: Oops, I made a boo-boo. STEWART: Well, that's why you have to adjust -- that's OK, don't worry about it. We can make the "boo" a little bitter.

MIDLER: OK, thank you Martha, thank you.

(END VIDEO CLIP)

(COMMERCIAL BREAK)

KING: We all can make fools of ourselves at times on daytime television.

STEWART: Can you double Dutch?

KING: No, are you kidding? Are you out of your mind? Martha Stewart is back. You're on -- when do you start on radio.

STEWART: Oh, we started yesterday. Yes, a big launch.

KING: Yesterday. What's the concept of the show?

STEWART: Well it's a channel. It's not just a show.

KING: You and Howard Stern on the same channel.

STEWART: On the same floor. We to walk by Howard to get to our recording booth.

KING: Howard is will be here January 5th.

STEWART: OK, the night before his launch.

KING: Get ready. I know.

STEWART: I think when he gets on Sirius, I think the whole thing is going to explode and very positively.

KING: What's the concept of your show?

STEWART: Well, ours is a channel devoted to good information.

KING: It's called the "Martha Stewart Channel"?

STEWART: It's called "Martha Stewart Living Radio" and it's Sirius channel 112.

KING: How often are you on?

STEWART: I'm on every single day our live simulcast of our daily show. And it works really well. I was -- it's really, really ...

KING: Because you're so visual.

STEWART: No, I know, but you're also very verbal and it turned out to be an OK thing and then we interview the guests after the show. I'm on also once a week with a live question and answer. It will be on Saturdays, and it's going to be a lot of fun to answer questions live again.

KING: Are you enjoying radio?

STEWART: Oh, yes. I've always loved radio because, you know, you started out just radio.

KING: Sure did.

STEWART: And you don't have to have hair and makeup. I love that.

KING: Nope. Wear anything you like.

STEWART: And you can wear anything you like. You can do it from your bedroom if you feel like it and you can have a real close rapport with your callers.

KING: You have a quote in "Fortune" magazine. Is this true? "I have learned that I really cannot be destroyed." Is that out of context?

STEWART: Well, yes. It's a little out of context because what I meant when she asked me, you know, what came out of going away to prison, that I couldn't be destroyed. I couldn't -- you know, I couldn't be destroyed.

KING: Oh, I see. Nothing could destroy you.

STEWART: Right.

KING: Not that you're indestructible.

STEWART: And I feel good about myself. Of course not. You can come in and run me over tomorrow and I'd be destroyed. That's totally wrong. No, just that I personally just -- I couldn't let something like that destroy me. And I felt good about that.

KING: Any concerns about overexposure?

STEWART: Well, no, because, you know, what we're doing is exactly what we did two years ago.

KING: Regular television, books and magazines.

STEWART: Same stuff. We're in the same businesses. We are just broadening our audience. The radio is broadening it, I'm sure. The -- we're working on a new magazine now for a slightly younger demographic.

KING: Do you have a blueprint?

STEWART: Yes, you've read about that.

KING: What's it about?

STEWART: Well, it's still not totally -- we haven't issued a press release yet, but it seems to be in all of the press papers. It's a magazine for the younger demographic and really the subtitle is "design your own life." Design your life. So we're helping people design their lives.

KING: And that includes all aspects.

STEWART: Oh, yes, all aspects of living for the younger generation. People with maybe their first home, their first apartment.

KING: That's the toughest thing to make a magazine go, isn't it?

STEWART: Not really. We've had very nice success with "Living," with "Everyday Food," with "Weddings," with "Kids," with "Body and Soul," so we've had a very nice run with our magazines.

KING: Martha Stewart's our guest. We'll be taking your phone calls in a little while.

At the top of the hour, Anderson Cooper. Are you back in New York now?

ANDERSON COOPER, CNN ANCHOR: No. I'm in L.A.

KING: Still there. I left L.A. last night. You're there. You come back here tomorrow, right?

COOPER: Actually I'm going to be out here for Thanksgiving and then I'll probably be back on Tuesday.

KING: What's up on "A.C. 360"?

COOPER: Yes, coming up at the top of the hour, a look at the mystery of Kara Borden, the 14-year-old whose mother and father were allegedly murdered by her 18-year-old boyfriend. One day after we learned she wasn't kidnapped after her parents were killed but instead went with the alleged killer willingly, authorities are trying to piece together a profile of the young teen. Is she an accomplice in the murder or did she not even know her parents had been shot?

Also tonight, keeping them honest. Last time, we brought you the story of over $60 million in FEMA and Red Cross payouts in Jackson, Mississippi, a town hardly touched by Hurricane Katrina. Tonight, we're learning there are indictments for fraud being handed down. We'll bring you that story, Larry.

KING: Thanks, Anderson. See you in 15 minutes. "A.C. 360" at the top of the hour. Back with Martha Stewart after this.

(COMMERCIAL BREAK)

KING: We're back with Martha Stewart. We'll take your calls in a minute. What's the legal -- is your appeal still going on?

STEWART: Yes, it is.

KING: What if you win?

STEWART: Wouldn't that be nice?

KING: A satiric victory though, right? You served the time.

STEWART: Well, that's OK. That's OK. I would be so grateful to win an appeal such as this.

KING: Let's take a call for Martha Stewart. Little Rock, Arkansas. Hello.

Caller: Hi, Martha. I bought a free-range turkey for the first time in my life and I was reading on the Internet somewhere where it said brining the turkey, that will destroy the flavor of it and we don't do a lot of that down here in the South, brining turkeys. I was just wondering what your opinion on that would be.

STEWART: Well, I actually have never brined a turkey either.

KING: What are we talking about? What is brining?

STEWART: Brining means soaking a turkey in a salty water that's flavored with something for a day or overnight in the refrigerator just to make the turkey moister. And I think a fresh-killed, organic turkey is so delicious by itself.

You just don't have to bother brining it, but we just did brine some turkeys last week and they were organic, and they were ultra juicy. They were delicious. So it's just do you like that flavor or not? You can try it sometime and just experience.

KING: Try it and see.

STEWART: Yes.

KING: Farmington Hills, Michigan for Martha Stewart. Hello?

CALLER: Hi. Thank you for taking my call, Larry and Martha.

KING: Sure.

STEWART: Hi.

Caller: I just want to tell you, Martha, I'm a yoga teacher in Michigan and I think your positive attitude and inner strength are inspiring. Did you practice before going to prison?

STEWART: Oh, I did. I love yoga. I practice Iyangar yoga which is the very studied poses.

KING: What does it do for you? STEWART: Oh it is so great. It keeps you limber. It keeps you moving. It keeps you -- your mind clear. A lot. Yoga is wonderful. And especially the limber part. To stretch and supple. It's great.

KING: A jury consulting firm is suing you?

STEWART: Oh, I have not even been served papers, Larry.

KING: Do you what it's about?

STEWART: I have an inkling what it's about. I have not been served so I don't want to make comments.

KING: Do you owe them something?

STEWART: No, I don't think so.

KING: On the DVD collection, you cover Thanksgiving and Christmas which is holiday cooking, entertaining, decorating, holiday crafts, gifts and I watch all these and I learn by your visuals.

STEWART: Yes. But right now, if you want to have information about how to do turkeys.

KING: Martha's classic Thanksgiving.

STEWART: These five different kinds of turkeys on here so you can learn how to deep fry, you know, everyone's talking about deep- fried turkeys.

KING: Have you deep fried a turkey?

STEWART: Deep fry. They're delicious.

KING: Deep fry a turkey.

STEWART: Not stuffed. You just drop it down into a really hot pot of peanut oil and it cooks in about six minutes a pound.

KING: Then drive to Mount Sinai and wait by the emergency room.

STEWART: No, darling, it's very good. It's delicious. And then we have the favorite family dinners.

KING: You do all of the cooking. You cook. You don't just stand in the kitchen and say go do this.

STEWART: No. I love to cook I've been cooking this whole week on the show. We've been making all kinds of stuff. We made pumpkin pie today.

KING: Did anyone propose the idea of doing a Martha Stewart chain of restaurants?

STEWART: Yes. People have suggested that. I'm not a -- I don't really want to have a restaurant. I really like going home at night and hanging out.

KING: What do you want more? What do you want -- you want to just keep on keeping on?

STEWART: Like you, Larry. Look at you, every single night doing a fantastic interview with fabulous people. And what I want to do is keep coming up with great ideas and teaching people. You know what? It's the greatest thing for you, personally, what you do and it's wonderful for the public.

KING: You never want to slow down?

STEWART: No, why? What do you want to slow down for?

KING: Will you marry again?

STEWART: You always ask me that.

You're married, Larry. You're gone.

KING: You have a boyfriend.

Martha and I went out once. Let's tell them. We told them on your show.

We did, we went out.

STEWART: We went out to dinner.

KING: It was a nice night.

STEWART: It was a very nice night.

KING: I have fond memories.

STEWART: Don't we have any other callers.

KING: Are you putting it down now.

STEWART: No. I'm very proud of it.

KING: You should be. I'm proud of it. Never dated a con -

STEWART: Will you stop it!

KING: I thought it was funny. Okay. We love Martha Stewart. She's everywhere! We'll be back with more moments and more phone calls. Don't go away.

(COMMERCIAL BREAK)

KING: Martha has two best-sellers on New York Times list. "The Martha Rules, Ten Essentials for Achieving Success as you Start, Build or Manage a Business." She appeared on the show when the book just came out.

And now, the baking book. "Martha Stewart's Baking Handbook." How many copies did you sell this weekend?

STEWART: Oh, in Minneapolis, I think a thousand, and in Chicago 800. I signed them all in two hours. People were standing in line. They were wonderful, enthusiastic --

KING: You write all of the baking stuff?

STEWART: I write a lot of stuff, Larry. I really like to write. I like to come up with new ideas. Of course, this I had help with because this is a big tome and it's -- .

KING: Are you a natural cook? Does it come easily?

STEWART: Yes, it comes easily. I like it and I'm a student of cooking. It's not like I just write about it. I can also do it.

KING: Do you like everyday foods. Would you like a hamburger?

STEWART: I don't eat a lot of hamburgers, but if I go to the D.B. Bistro. Have you been there?

KING: The D.B. Bistro?

STEWART: Danielle Boulud's Bistro. Yes. He has the ultimate hamburger.

KING: Do you ever walk down the street and buy a slice of pizza?

STEWART: No. But I do buy hot dogs.

KING: You do?

STEWART: Papaya king.

KING: You never go with the knishes.

STEWART: No, I get knishes down on Houston Street.

KING: Do you like my Jewish food?

STEWART: I love Jewish food. I like all kind of food.

KING: How's your mom?

STEWART: Mom is great. I'm sure she's watching. She's -- .

KING: How old now?

STEWART: Ninety-one. She's great.

KING: She's very proud of you.

STEWART: Called her up to take her to the movies the other day and she was going to the concert to her hear "The Messiah," and I thought, good.

KING: Must feel awful good for you to be back in this city at this time of year. Compared to last year.

STEWART: Oh, it is so nice. It is so nice to see all the lights going up. The excitement. I went shopping at lunchtime today for Christmas things and it's fun. The stores are crowded. It looks good. New York looks real good.

KING: We had a little rain today, but there is at Christmas time no city like this city.

STEWART: I don't think so.

KING: Anywhere.

STEWART: I don't think so.

KING: Thank you, Martha.

STEWART: Thank you.

KING: Martha Stewart. Just turn somewhere, you'll find her. She's everywhere.

A sad note before we go, "Time" magazine columnist, Hugh Sidey, a keen observer of the modern United States presidents, died yesterday in Paris suddenly. Nancy Reagan said Hugh Sidey was one of America's most trusted journalist and he was a welcome guest on this show. Our thoughts and prayer goes out to his family. Hugh Sidey, dead at 78.

Tomorrow night, Supreme Court Justice Steven Breyer will be our special guest. It is now my special duty to turn things over to Anderson Cooper.

(END VIDEOTAPE)

KING: Two of our favorites, Jerry Seinfeld and Martha Stewart. Congratulations to Martha, by the way, on her daytime show getting picked up for another season.

And speaking of favorites, the Reverend Billy Graham when our King size Christmas continues. Don't go away.

TO ORDER A VIDEO OF THIS TRANSCRIPT, PLEASE CALL 800-CNN-NEWS OR USE OUR SECURE ONLINE ORDER FORM LOCATED AT www.fdch.com

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