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Glenn Beck

Why Not English as Official U.S. Language?; Border Patrol Demoralized by Catch and Release; Unbridled Consumption: Over the Top Celebrations

Aired May 22, 2006 - 19:00   ET

THIS IS A RUSH TRANSCRIPT. THIS COPY MAY NOT BE IN ITS FINAL FORM AND MAY BE UPDATED.

ANNOUNCER: The following takes place between the hours of 7 pm and 8 pm. Or, it takes place between the hours of 9 pm and 10 pm. Or, it takes place between the hours of midnight and 1 am. Either way, it contains graphic images of a doughy, pasty, middle-aged white guy. Viewer discretion is advised.
GLENN BECK, HOST: This week, there will be more negotiations on the bill which states that English should be our country`s national language. I mean, I don`t really see what the big deal is. Hasn`t that always been the case here in America? I see English signs everywhere. My TV speaks English to me, and that enchanting musk I`m wearing? English Leather, baby.

Yet Minority Leader Harry Reid says, "I really believe that this amendment is racist." That`s a quote.

Let me ask you something here, Harry. Is making the dollar the national currency racist against the peso? Is Fahrenheit racist against Celsius? No, it`s just what we use here in America.

Nowhere in this bill does it say you can`t learn or speak another language. Condi Rice, she speaks -- count them -- seven of them. I happen to speak one language, poorly.

What the bill does say is that if you want to live here, you should learn the language that everybody speaks. We need to be able to communicate with each other. We need to be able to melt with each other. Do you remember the concept of the melting pot?

My wife`s family is Italian -- and I mean full-fledged, talk with your hands Italian. In the last election I think they voted for Tony Danza. They`re the kind of people that would fly the Italian flag but always beneath the American flag. They`re proud of where they came from. But they`re more proud that they came here and now they`re Americans.

You know, I know that everybody who lives came from someplace else. So by all means, let`s preserve and pass on our heritage. It`s what makes us so strong. But again, we`ve got to melt. If we can`t communicate with each other, because you`re speaking Spanish and I`m speaking what sounds, quite honestly, like drunken pig-Latin, then we`ll never learn about each other. Omprende-kay? Yes. I thought so.

Mauro Mujica runs U.S. English. And Mauro, your whole goal is to preserve the English language in America.

MAURO MUJICA, U.S. ENGLISH: Yes, it takes sense, doesn`t it?

BECK: Well, it does to me. Isn`t this kind of what Canada does? I mean, Canada was with the French and the English. It doesn`t really work, does it?

MUJICA: No. Canada doesn`t work at all. It was a shotgun wedding of two different countries put together as a result of a war in Europe.

BECK: I don`t think I`ve ever heard it described as a shotgun wedding before.

MUJICA: That`s exactly what it was.

BECK: Yes.

MUJICA: It was two different countries.

BECK: Right.

MUJICA: They settled the war in Europe and then, as a consequence, they put this country together.

BECK: Where are you from?

MUJICA: I`m from Chile. I was born in Chile.

BECK: And when did you come here?

MUJICA: I came 41 years ago to study at Columbia University. I`m an architect.

BECK: OK. So you`re first generation. Your parents didn`t bring you. You came here?

MUJICA: No, I came. I was 23 or so when I came.

BECK: And you expected to learn the language?

MUJICA: Well, of course. I learned it before I came. I knew I was going to an American -- I mean, an English speaking country, and I learned the language. I took the entrance exam at Columbia University and passed.

BECK: This doesn`t make sense to me, and you can common sense this for me. How successful do you think you`d be if you still spoke Spanish and didn`t speak English?

MUJICA: Not really good (ph). I would be completely -- I would be probably doing gardening somewhere.

BECK: Right. I mean, doesn`t -- I mean, you can`t be successful here in America, can you, without speaking English? Or if I went over to Germany, I mean, how stupid would I be if I just came into the country and expected everybody else to bend to me and start speaking English? I couldn`t be a success in Germany speaking English.

MUJICA: Right. But that was never been a problem in this country. You know, we have a long, long history of immigrants coming to the country. They never questioned that they were coming to an English speaking country. They never questioned the concept that they were going to become Americans. What they said to their kids is that we are Americans now.

BECK: But let me -- let me play devil`s advocate here. Because a lot of people would come over here and they`d bring the kids, and they didn`t learn the language, but they insisted that their kids did. Isn`t this always solved through the second generation of Americans?

MUJICA: Not really. If you go to some cities in this country where you have American-born kids that do not speak a word of English, there`s about two million of them.

BECK: Assimilation is really key.

MUJICA: It`s absolutely essential.

BECK: Why?

MUJICA: Well, it makes sense. You move to another country, you begin behaving -- you begin behaving like the people in the other country. If I were to move to England, I would begin driving on the other side of the street. It doesn`t matter what my culture tells me. You have to assimilate. You have to do things the way they`re done in a country.

You know, it`s like saying, "I`m from some country where we didn`t wear any clothing, you know. And I come to this country and I want to walk around naked to preserve my culture."

BECK: Personally -- personally, I`d suggest that neither of us go to visit that country. Mauro, thank you very much. I appreciate your time, sir.

MUJICA: Thank you.

BECK: You bet.

ANNOUNCER: This is Glenn Beck.

BECK: All right, let me switch gears here for just a second. This is actually according to a recent report, that the morale of U.S. border patrolmen is extremely low. Gee, why, I wonder? Could it be that it`s because every single illegal immigrant they catch is basically set free?

You know what? If I were patrolling the border, I`d be bummed out too. The "catch and release" system we currently have going on is -- I mean, it`s as satisfying as taking your cousin to the prom. Really. And I know, because that`s what I did in high school. Nah, actually, I`m kidding. She turned me down.

But Andy Ramirez started Friends of the Border Patrol, which is kind of like a neighborhood watch for the border.

Andy, does it -- does it kind of feel pointless to arrest immigrant smugglers when a lot of the time they`re not even being prosecuted?

ANDY RAMIREZ, FRIENDS OF THE BORDER PATROL: Well, that`s exactly it, Glenn. And thanks for having me on.

BECK: Sure.

RAMIREZ: When you look at the border patrol agents and what they have to say, they`re entirely disgusted and demoralized. They feel that they`ve been reduced to Wal-Mart greeters or Christmas Santas, you know, just waving hello, welcome, to America.

BECK: You know, I`ve got to tell you, not even as important as a Wal- Mart greeter. A Wal-Mart greeter makes a difference. When you walk into Wal-Mart and there`s a guy that`s standing there and he`s smiling, and he`s looking at you and saying thank you, he`s doing his job. And he knows that Wal-Mart appreciates it.

The way we`re treating our border patrol, how -- have you ever had a job, Andy, where you just know that what you do is of no value to the company? You`re absolutely demoralized.

RAMIREZ: Yes. And it`s even beyond that because they want to do the job, but they`re not being allowed to do the job. They`re not being given the tools.

BECK: Right.

RAMIREZ: And it starts up at Washington, D.C. It`s not as if the sector chiefs who are in charge of them in the various areas of the countries are saying, "Hey, guys, you can`t do this." It`s all starting from Washington.

BECK: Right. And you know -- if you got up every morning and you knew, everything I`m going to do today is going to be all undone, what would you get you up in the morning? How could you possibly shut that alarm clock off and get up and jump out of bed? You`re not making any difference in your own head, at least.

RAMIREZ: What they tell me is it`s duty to this country.

It`s so bad that people outside of this country -- let`s say they`re coming from Cuba, Dominican Republic, Haiti, what have you, right? Other than Mexican. They`ll go to a place like Puerto Rico and they`ll already have their plane tickets in hand, because they know, "OK, I`m going to go and see the Border Patrol. I`m going to self report. And then afterwards they`re going to give me my documents, tell me to return for a court date that I`m never coming back to." And then they go wherever they want, points unknown.

BECK: Andy, is there anybody -- well, let me ask this question. How long have you been a hate-monger? You racist.

Andy, how -- whoever thought that this was a good idea? When did they think, "You know, we should catch them and release them"?

And who sat around in that room and said, "That`s a good idea"?

RAMIREZ: That`s the very thing a lot of people would like to know, both inside and outside of the agency. People in Congress have been asking that question and they`re not getting answers. I hope they do hold congressional hearings soon to get to the bottom of this.

It`s worsened in the past two years under the leadership of national chief of the Border Patrol, David Aguilar. It was never this bad under Gustav Lavigna (ph), his predecessor.

BECK: Are you surprised that we have as many illegal aliens here in the country that we do? I mean, what kind of message does the catch and release thing send?

RAMIREZ: Well, that`s the thing is they already know to show up with plane tickets. The problem is it`s not just catch and release. But we catch them. We don`t just release them. We also basically give them the option to go home voluntarily if they`re Mexican. Or if they`re not, they can basically do whatever they want. It`s really scary because we don`t know who`s staying here, and we don`t even know what the story is with the guys we`re not catching. If we caught 1.2 million, how many didn`t we catch?

BECK: Did you see the story in "The New York Times" this weekend? We hope to bring you this story later on this week. About the 400 women that had been mutilated and killed -- brutally killed in Juarez, Mexico. Are these guys coming across the border who are doing this? Who knows?

Go ahead, Andy.

RAMIREZ: Well, absolutely. They actually are. I was just in El Paso, Texas, late March and meeting with the sheriffs of Hudspeth and El Paso counties. And the stories you hear about this is endless.

BECK: Yes.

RAMIREZ: One of the things they do, is these brutal people, they take the women. They rape them. And then they hoist their underwear on a line afterwards like it`s a trophy. And you find lines of women`s underwear strewn up all over the border area.

BECK: Horrible stuff. Andy, thank you so much. I appreciate your time, sir.

RAMIREZ: Thanks for having me on.

BECK: You bet. Bye-bye.

(COMMERCIAL BREAK)

(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)

BECK: How many horse doctors did you see this weekend? It`s not like humans who can rest in bed. The horses are always on their feet.

We can build tunnels to England and we can`t get a horse off his feet for a couple of weeks? Is it just me that thought geez, after all of this, the next step is he gets to go out. He`s in an air conditioned barn with teak and mahogany. He`s got ladies coming, shuttled in. I mean, that`s a sweet gig. I think he deserves a little better than shooting him in the head, because his leg is sore.

(END VIDEO CLIP)

BECK: Don`t you think really?

You know, one of the biggest problems facing our country right now is we feel compelled to buy stuff that we don`t really need or we can`t afford. This is really, I think, the reason why we don`t stay home with our kids. It`s also why the average college kid is thousands of dollars in debt. We`ll do anything to drive the right car, wear the right label, watch the right plasma, no matter what the cost.

If we can solve this problem individually of out-of-control spending, I`ve got to tell you, I think we solve a lot of our problems. All week, we`re going to take a look at this with a series we called "Unbridled Consumption".

First up, if you`re having a party, forget the celebration. Forget the marriage, the birthday. Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. It`s time to focus on what`s really important. Can you out-do your friends, and succeed in having the most over-the-top, obnoxious party of the month? Maybe, but only if you put your mind to it.

(BEGIN VIDEOTAPE)

BECK (voice-over): In the Jewish religion, the bat mitzvah is a rite of passage, a crossover from childhood to adulthood, where the child becomes responsible for his own deeds, spiritually, ethically and morally.

UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: She loves the ruffles, because she wanted a poofy dress. But it`s a service. So she needs -- so that`s why she needs a custom, too, because she can kind of take a ruffle but put a jacket with it as opposed to just going and buying a poofy dress off the rack.

UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: I just like how it`s so poofy.

BECK: Scholars have yet to find any reference to poofy in the Talmud. But the main theme and focus of the bat mitzvah is the celebration of becoming a young woman in the eyes of Jewish tradition.

UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: This is the exact same color of the flowers. And everything I bought was just pink and orange. They`re all -- everything is pink and orange.

BECK: It`s about taking your place within the Jewish faith and becoming a responsible member of the community.

UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: All the tablecloths are pink and orange, and all the flowers are pink and orange. And I think the decorations also are pink and orange. We`re going to get favors that are pink and orange.

BECK: Preparation for the bat mitzvah takes years of study and preparation.

UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: It`s September 6, 2008.

BECK: That means her bat mitzvah is only two years, six months and, I don`t know, a long way away for an 11-year-old to worry about anything.

UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: I want to do it customized, like, so it`s not the same as everybody else`s. And I want it to have a lot of accessory but not too much.

BECK: Wait a minute. Aren`t you like 11 years old?

UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: I like this color and this kind of fabric.

BECK: You should be outside playing with other girls.

UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: This is so simple and has little bows.

BECK: Well, perhaps, like these girls, you should also start worrying about your prom.

UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: I wanted something that would kind of, you know, stop everything.

BECK: The prom is about individuality, about picking the right dress that will look great no matter how many times your date throws up on it.

UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: I just would die if I walked in and someone was wearing the same dress as me.

UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: It worries me a lot, but like, I`ve talked to a few girls about it, and everyone says that I`m OK for now. But I mean, if one other senior has it, then I have to change my dress.

BECK: The prom is also a ritual that has withstood the test of time. It`s a ritual as sacred as the pre-prom, the pre-pre-prom and, of course, the post-prom beach party.

UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: OK, there`s pre-pre-prom and that`s with just like the people in your limo and, like, the families. That`s where you take all the pictures, like, kind of like the typical prom pictures, with the poses and stuff. And there`s pre-prom with everybody. And then like - - like...

BECK: And then like, like, you know, then what?

UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: And then after the prom is after-prom. People usually go for like the city club attire, like really short dresses, like really like kind of low-cut tops, like more revealing.

UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: More fun looking.

BECK: Ah, the innocence of youth.

Weddings. What could be more beautiful than a couple stating their vows of love and commitment to each other, amongst friends and family, and videographers and florists and valet parkers and a team of lawyers that have just drafted your prenup? You get the idea.

This is why some people hire a wedding planner, to make those tough choices a little easier.

MARCY BLUM, WEDDING PLANNER: The idea of either you can have chicken or fish or beef sort of didn`t -- didn`t work for me.

BECK: They can help you with things like preparing a simple menu, one that will appeal to everyone.

UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: We had a lobster salad with crushed avocado and tomato leaves. The entree was a lam chop and the dessert was aged Gouda and cherry strudel.

BECK: Does anyone think cherries and smelly old cheese are a good combo? But anyway.

A budget is always useful when planning a wedding, especially when you`re young, starting a life together and your parents are footing the bill. Just remember, it`s not about how much you spend.

BLUM: You don`t ever want someone to leave and say, "Do you believe how much money they spent on that?" That`s certainly not my intent.

BECK: Oh, yes, that`s right. It is about how much you spend.

BLUM: Maybe between $500 and $1,000 a person.

BECK: But let`s be honest. Let`s not let the wedding get in the way of the true meaning of this day. The true reason people are here.

CHARMAINE JONES, CAKE DIVA: It`s really the cake. Hello. The cake is like the total center of attention. And it totally makes the party, and it`s like huge. I love -- I love huge cakes.

BECK: Meet Charmaine Jones, who would prefer that you call her the cake diva. And you thought I was kidding.

JONES: I`ve lived my life for the past 16 years to change the world of cakes.

BECK: And single-handedly she has made the world of cakes really expensive.

JONES: This cake would probably feed about 250 people. So we charge like $10 a person.

BECK: Wow, that comes to $25,000. No wait, $2,500. Oh, well, that`s not as expensive as $25,000 a cake but an awful lot of money for flower and frosting. I`m sorry. Go on, ambiguous cake diva.

JONES: You always pretty much have to have a separate ceremony for the cutting of the cake, because the cake is what`s going to be in the picture when they go through their album. The cutting of the cake, the feeding, when the bride and groom feed each other, not smashing it in the face, because people get divorced because of that.

BECK: Which brings us to divorce. Ah, the untapped market. My mind is racing already. Divorce diva, stay tuned.

(END VIDEOTAPE)

ANNOUNCER: Coming up on GLENN BECK.

(COMMERCIAL BREAK)

BECK: All right. Welcome to today`s "Quality of Life" market update.

The commencement sector took a big hit today on the news that some college graduates have apparently gone four years, or in some cases much longer, without ever learning the first thing about manners. Senator John McCain, speaking at New York`s New School -- I love that one -- took the podium and was greeted by dozens of students and faculty members turning their backs on him. Watch this.

(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)

SEN. JOHN MCCAIN (R), ARIZONA: Only a fool or a fraud would sentimentalize this war. Americans should argue about this war. It has cost the lives of nearly 2,500...

(END VIDEO CLIP)

BECK: OK, stop the video. This is actually -- when he started talking about Vietnam, they actually started screaming, "Boring" out to him.

Undergraduate keynote speaker Jean Rohe, who later addressed the crowd, was adamant in her belief that a commencement address is the wrong place to inject partisan politics. Listen to her.

(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)

JEAN ROHE, KEYNOTE SPEAKER: Right now I`m going to be who I am and digress from my previously prepared remarks that I had been working on for the past several weeks. The senator does not reflect the ideals upon which the university was founded. Not only this -- not only this, but his invitation was a top-down decision that did not take into thought the desires and interests of the students...

(END VIDEO CLIP)

BECK: Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. I can`t take her.

Now, on to New Orleans, where the stock of Mayor Ray Nagin rose after his narrow reelection this weekend. The stock of New Orleans, unfortunately, continued its straight down nosedive free fall on the news.

But I, along with lots of other people, who rely on a constant influx of comedy, am glad that Mayor Nagin is back. So, in honor, Mr. Mayor, we`ve put together a little congratulatory video for you and Chocolate Town.

(BEGIN VIDEOTAPE)

ANNOUNCER: Congratulations, Major Ray Nagin, on winning re-election, and thank you to the people of New Orleans who made it happen. It was touch and go there for awhile. But you came through in the end.

MAYOR RAY NAGIN, NEW ORLEANS: I think the nation is being entertained. I think this is a big reality TV show for the nation.

ANNOUNCER: You`re right. We like to call it, "Extreme Mayoral Incompetence."

NAGIN: They really don`t get what really happened during Katrina. All they say was those awful images.

ANNOUNCER: You mean like these and these, oh, and these?

NAGIN: They really don`t get Ray Nagin.

ANNOUNCER: No, what we don`t get is this.

NAGIN: Surely God is mad at America.

ANNOUNCER: And this. And we really don`t get this.

NAGIN: This city will be chocolate at the end of the day.

ANNOUNCER: But honestly, Ray, now that you`re re-elected how much would you bet on the city`s recovery, $1,000, a million dollars?

NAGIN: I will bet anybody in here a dollar that at the end of the year New Orleans will have at least 300,000 people living and working in this city.

ANNOUNCER: You`ve got yourself a deal, Mr. Nagin. With confidence and bravado like that, it`s no wonder the people couldn`t say no to you.

NAGIN: It`s time for us to rebuild a New Orleans, the one that should be, a chocolate New Orleans.

ANNOUNCER: Or at least 52.7 percent of them couldn`t.

(END VIDEOTAPE)

(COMMERCIAL BREAK)

(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)

BECK: When people say that I have no other choice, most times, I find that bull crap.

CALLER: Right. Right.

BECK: Most times people are not driving a car from 1990. Most times they`re living in a nicer house than what they really need. Those people don`t need to put their children in daycare. Those people...

UNIDENTIFIED MALE: I drive a car from 1985, Glenn, so I guess I`m not those people.

BECK: The question is: Have you traded off stuff for time with your child?

(END VIDEO CLIP)

BECK: Well, apparently nobody is watching my show tonight in Poway, California. That`s just north of San Diego. Actually, to be fair, they`re not watching Oprah`s Legends Ball, which I was all a-tingle for, or the season finale of "24," which I`m watching during the commercial breaks. Yes, TiVo.

In fact, they`re not supposed to watch any TV or check the mail or even answer the phone. It`s family focus night in Poway. They`re encouraged to spend time together as a family, starting with dinner. Then they can do whatever they want. They can play games. They can visit grandma. They can go for a bike ride or, my personal favorite, eat ice cream together as a family, as long as it`s together.

Now, I`ve got to tell you, I love this idea. What bothers me is, when did we wake up in a country where things like this had to be planned, that it took official endorsements from the city, the Chamber of Commerce, the churches, the PTA, all had to burn up the phone lines just to schedule four hours of time to act like a family?

You know, I know that we`re no longer in the "Leave it to Beaver" days. But isn`t this nuts?

Caitlin Flanagan, I warn you, this is very politically incorrect. She`s got a book out called "To Hell with All of That: Loving and Loathing our Inner Housewife."

Great title. Caitlin, when did housewife become a dirty word in America?

CAITLIN FLANAGAN, AUTHOR: Well, I was sort of preoccupied by that just horrible description of that town in California. Thank God I don`t live there. It sounds like a really miserable night about to be had by everybody.

BECK: Oh, it`s horrible, isn`t it?

FLANAGAN: I think that -- you know, housewifery or working moms, all of that aside, I think the larger question that those folks are trying to grapple with is that, as with many affluent families in America, they have constructed a life they want to escape from. And it`s not the work part of the have-to-do part they want to escape from; it`s the fun they want to escape from. And if there`s no greater example of affluenza than that, you know, I can`t imagine one.

BECK: Now, you know, it`s really difficult, because I wrestle with it in my own life. You know, you buy into this garbage from what you see on television, and magazines, and everything else that this is the things you have to have to be able to create a life, you know, your being able to grant your kids these kinds of things, when all they really want is just our time.

FLANAGAN: Exactly right. I think the official name of that group`s program tonight is called "Do Nothing Day." And I think it shows that they`re lurching toward an idea that has value, but they aren`t there yet. The notion that spending time with one`s family is doing nothing at all shows how far we`ve gotten from truly valuing families.

To me, being with my family and not running around to a bunch of activities is doing something of profound value.

BECK: Do you think...

FLANAGAN: It used to be all the great religions of the world take aside a day every week for being quiet and for being contemplative or for worshipping God, and now every moment is crammed.

BECK: Caitlin, I have to tell you that, about five years ago, my family and I, we started setting aside the Sabbath day. And we don`t do anything on Sunday except just spend time together.

My kids originally hated it because we couldn`t go to the mall, we couldn`t do this, blah, blah, blah. It is now their favorite day of the week. It`s mine, as well. I think I would be insane without that day.

It doesn`t have to be a religious observation. Just shut everything down. Vow to yourself that you`re not going to spend money, you`re not going to do stuff. You`re going to center yourself on the family. It makes all the difference in the world.

FLANAGAN: Well, I`m always telling families to every single day, if you want to find three great hours with your kids, just have power down time, meaning there`s no iPod, there`s no MySpace, Dad`s not checking his BlackBerry, Mom`s not got something on DVD, that there`s not going to be any kind of electronic media, and any homework that`s done on a computer is done on one that is not connected to an Internet.

And if something in particular has to be researched, Dad or Mom will do it with a child, and you will find two or three of the best hours of the week to be had every single day if you just get the family off this addiction to electronic media.

BECK: Yes, well, let`s not go too far. I mean, between 7:00 and 8:00, 9:00 and 10:00, and midnight to 1:00 is great television on some...

FLANAGAN: I can`t imagine any better family time than to getting together in front of Headline News.

BECK: That`s right.

FLANAGAN: I think that`s what we`re trying to work toward.

BECK: Well, you`re the expert. We`re going to leave it at that. Love to have you back, because there`s a lot I`d like to discuss with you, so we`ll have you back. Caitlin, thank you so much.

FLANAGAN: You bet.

BECK: All right. Let`s go "Straight to Hill," Erica Hill, the anchor of "PRIME NEWS" on Headline News.

`Allo, Erica.

ERICA HILL, CNN HEADLINE NEWS ANCHOR: `Allo, luvey.

BECK: `Allo. Speaking the whole thing in an English accent, shall we?

HILL: Oh, I don`t know. I think I`m going to leave it up to you, because we might get a little hate mail.

BECK: Right. Oh, no, we`d never get any hate mail.

HILL: Not on this show.

BECK: No, never.

HILL: Not in television.

BECK: No, no.

HILL: You don`t get hate mail for television ever.

BECK: What`s happening in the news today?

HILL: You know, this story just broke my heart over the weekend. I`m sure you`ve heard about it. A little bit of an update for you now. A tough battle ahead, as we know, for the Kentucky Derby winner Barbaro.

If you`re not familiar with the story, the famous horse underwent six hours of surgery after he breaking his leg in three places at the start of Saturday`s Preakness Stakes. Well, Barbaro`s vet saying today the horse is making progress.

His survival odds, though, are still only 50-50. He has 23 screws in his leg. The only thing we do know for sure is that, sadly, Barbaro will never race again. But, Glenn, there is a little bit of good news: Barbaro is apparently showing interest in a few mares.

BECK: Well, I mean, you`re on your death bed. You`ve spent your whole life being hit with a stick, trying to run, and you know at the end you`re going to make it with horse chicks.

HILL: And if you`re lucky for, like, you know, a long time, as most of them do, they retire early.

BECK: That`s right. Let me tell you something: If I break my leg, if I ever become a horse and I break my leg, I want you to bring the horse chicks to me.

HILL: OK, so we shouldn`t do what they normally do and euthanize the horse?

BECK: No, that`s -- no, shoot me in the head?

HILL: So many people are pulling for this horse. It`s so sad.

BECK: You know what`s amazing about this story is there`s the two sides to it, for me at least. I see that the owner really loves the animal, which is so nice to see. And then, at the same time, you can see that he`s like, "Holy cow, do you know how much this is going to cost me? How many millions am I going to lose on this?" Where you see the financial side of this, just trying to keep him alive for that, as well.

HILL: That`s true. That`s true. And, you know, there was some question, too, you know, what if they`re just doing this for money? And from everything that`s come out, it`s so obvious...

BECK: Oh, no.

HILL: ... as you said, they really, truly adore this horse...

BECK: No, they love the horse.

HILL: ... and all they want is, is the best for it. And, by the way, an interesting fact. This is something we talked about on our show about - - I always kind of wondered why they had to put a horse down normally if there was an injury with its leg.

BECK: Sure.

HILL: Those legs are like matchsticks, apparently.

BECK: Do you know that can put your -- a race horse, you can put your hand around the ankle of a horse.

HILL: They`re super thin. But they also -- you really need all four legs to balance the weight. They just can`t do it on three, because they`re so heavy, but their legs are so thin. And they don`t have muscles that go all the way down.

BECK: I don`t know why we can`t make a little cart for the third, you know what I mean, just a little...

HILL: Well, why don`t you work on that?

BECK: I`m thinking about it.

HILL: All right. Well, while you`re thinking about that, another story getting a lot of attention today: Seven-year-old Braxton Bilbrey now the youngest person to ever swim from Alcatraz Island to San Francisco.

BECK: Oh, this drives me nuts. This drives me nuts.

HILL: Why?

BECK: Are you going to put a seven-year-old in the water?

HILL: Wait, wait. First of all...

BECK: Come on!

HILL: ... you can`t pass judgment on the kid or his parents, because nobody knows the story there. He apparently asked to do it. And it`s...

(CROSSTALK)

BECK: Oh, if I remember right, when I was seven, I asked for a Superman cape so I could jump off the roof of my house. My parents said no.

HILL: Well, here`s the story. Apparently, he read the story about the nine-year-old kid from Hillsborough, California, who made the swim, and he said to his coach, he said, "Hey, Coach, do you think I could do this?" And the coach is quoted as saying, "Well, I mean, I didn`t realize he was talking about doing it at seven. I thought later on. And I said, `Well, you know, yes, sure,` but the kid was serious."

One of the reasons he did it, by the way, was to raise awareness for drowning in his home state of Arizona.

BECK: Let me tell you something. Let me tell you something. If Clint Eastwood couldn`t do it in a movie, a seven-year-old kid shouldn`t be allowed to do it.

HILL: Let me tell you, I`m never doing it, because I know how cold that water is.

BECK: Oh, it`s insanity.

HILL: Lastly, this is one you`re going to love, and I`m sure you`ve been following it. A Louisiana congressman now the center of a bribery investigation for allegedly accepting $100,000 from an FBI informant. Are you stopping me there?

BECK: No, it just makes my eyes bleed. It really does. How can we hear about Jack Abramoff over and over again -- my head is going to explode. Watch it. I`ve got to tell you, how can we hear about this guy, but this is the same nut job that took -- I think it was the National Guard from New Orleans, drove them to the house, and said, "Hey, I need to check what`s in my house," during the Hurricane Katrina, with other people on the roof.

The guy`s a dirt bag, alleged dirt bag.

HILL: Don`t hold back.

BECK: Erica has credibility.

(LAUGHTER)

Erica, thanks a lot. Appreciate it.

HILL: Have a good night.

BECK: Bye-bye.

(COMMERCIAL BREAK)

BECK: Oh, so dark the reviews of the critics. On Friday, it sounded like "Da Vinci Code" was headed to the movie heap inhabited by "Battlefield Earth" and `I Heart Huckabees." Classic. Actually, it raked in $77 million at the box office, proving once again boycotts a movie`s best friend.

I saw it over the weekend. And, you know, it`s no "Raiders of the Lost Ark." Well, I mean, it kind of is, except with a lot more boring talking and no big rocks rolling after Harrison Ford.

Last week I told I think there are only about eight people who haven`t read the book. Apparently, I was wrong. There are only seven. Our very own Brian Sack actually tracked them down to test the theory: To understand the movie, do you need to read the book?

(BEGIN VIDEOTAPE)

BRIAN SACK, MAN ABOUT TOWN: You haven`t read the "Da Vinci Code"?

UNIDENTIFIED MALE: I haven`t read the "Da Vinci Code."

SACK: Can you summarize the plot for us?

UNIDENTIFIED MALE: Sure. Something to do with Jesus. I have no idea.

UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: Mona Lisa and the Bible, something.

UNIDENTIFIED MALE: Some guy looks at the Mona Lisa and finds out all this special stuff that`s encoded in there, like Jesus` special extramarital family.

UNIDENTIFIED MALE: Man has been living under a con or something. The Web site is...

SACK: ... the Catholic Church, though, some underground cult of the...

UNIDENTIFIED MALE: Yes, some underground secret.

UNIDENTIFIED MALE: Some sort of code hidden in the paintings, I think.

UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: I think it`s like murder-mystery kind of art thing.

UNIDENTIFIED MALE: Some guy gets, like, found dead in front of the painting.

UNIDENTIFIED MALE: It looked like he was naked.

UNIDENTIFIED MALE: They figured it out, and they try to -- they run after him, trying to kill him.

UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: Then the two main characters fall in love and they destroy the bad guys.

UNIDENTIFIED MALE: That they inform man, and man is no longer being conned.

UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: It ends by them jumping off a cliff.

(END VIDEOTAPE)

BECK: All right, actually, I did see it over the weekend, and the best way to describe it is "Natural Treasure," that`s what it`s like, not Da Vinci.

Let`s lighten things up a little bit. Tonight, here in New York, at the Whitney Museum is -- well, they`re uniting American art with a pen and a supermodel. The pen in a second. Let`s hold off on that. Let`s go to the supermodel.

If you`re guy, you`ve seen her in "Sports Illustrated," the swimsuit issue. If you`re a woman, you`ve seen her in every single fashion magazine, star on NBC`s "Las Vegas."

Hi, Molly, how are you?

MOLLY SIMS, MODEL: Hi, Glenn, how are you?

BECK: Pleasure, nice to have you.

SIMS: So nice to meet you.

BECK: Let me just say this right off the top. I know what you`re thinking. And the answer is, no, I`m a happily married man.

SIMS: You do look like Tim Allen, "Tool Time."

BECK: I look like Tim Allen?

SIMS: From "Tool Time."

BECK: Really?

SIMS: Because you have like -- you know, you`re very, like, perfect, but you`re funny.

BECK: Macho. Macho is what you`re...

SIMS: No, you`re not too macho.

BECK: No, I`ve got a pink shirt on. Let me ask you this, because I have so many things I want to talk to you about. Let me start with this.

I saw this in the paper, and my wife and I were talking about. I mean, I say the paper. It`s the stupid "Globe," but I saw this in the paper. And my wife and I talked about it over the week.

How do people in Hollywood -- how do our kids win? I mean, you are stunning. You`re beautiful. You`re a supermodel. Blah, blah, blah, all this stuff that you know.

Nicole Ritchie looks like this now. Can you get a shot of this? Wait a minute. Hang on. I`m trying to learn how to turn it. There it is. This is what Nicole Ritchie looks like. Frightening, don`t you think?

The whole article is about, "Look at how she has gotten to so skinny." But yet, in the same article, they have this picture of her with the word "chunky" over her. How do you win?

SIMS: You don`t. That`s the thing. You don`t win. If you`re too heavy, then you`re too heavy. If you`re too thin, then you`re too thin. It`s never perfect and it`s never right.

BECK: What is your life like? What`s a supermodel`s life like?

SIMS: You know, I think, as a model -- and I`ve done it now for almost 11 years -- it was much more difficult, in terms of the weight issue, because you have to fit into sample size. The designers only make between size zero and four, so there, on its own...

BECK: Four? What kind of fat cows are wearing fours?

(LAUGHTER)

SIMS: But seriously, so, in that way, there was much more pressure. And I think, because everything depended on what you looked like, that made it very difficult.

BECK: So you are successful, obviously, as a supermodel. You are, you know, on NBC, an actress, a successful...

(CROSSTALK)

SIMS: But now I think it`s much easier, because not everything depends on what I look like.

BECK: Right.

SIMS: You know, I get to use my brain and intelligence and...

BECK: It`s got to be horrible. What`s the core of you? What is the thing that you`re most proud of, that makes you -- what completes you? Besides me, what completes you?

SIMS: It`s funny. Right before we came on, I heard that Anderson Cooper was sitting in the makeup room. And I was like, "I have to go. I have to go and I just have to introduce myself, because I love his stories, I love, you know, his reporting." And I guess one thing that I`ve gotten into is charitable work, because it makes you feel so good about yourself, and you give back.

BECK: You are involved with an orphanage in Mexico.

SIMS: Yes, called El Faro. And we take care of 110 kids. We feed them; we bathe them; we educate them; and we help them with medical.

BECK: Is it true you work your whole schedule -- you build your life around that?

SIMS: I don`t necessarily build my life around it, but we`ll go down there once every four weeks. And we have about 20 people who do. I think what happened with me is, after September 11th -- and I found out that I`d given all this money, and I was living in New York at the time, I`d given all the money -- not all the money, but the money that I was giving to the charity, to Red Cross, I found out that it actually didn`t go to people, and I couldn`t believe it.

BECK: Right.

SIMS: And I thought...

BECK: You wanted to get in personally involved? I felt the same.

SIMS: Of course.

BECK: I think everybody in America did.

SIMS: And, you know, I think and that`s kind of where I changed. And now that I know that, if I give a dollar, I know it goes to either bathe them, feed them...

BECK: Right.

SIMS: ... get them in and out of the hospital, whatever. And I know that that money goes there. And that, to me, that makes a big difference.

BECK: OK. My crew is yelling at me here because we have about a minute left. And tonight, you`re unveiling a pen...

SIMS: Tonight, at the Whitney Museum of American Art, we`re unveiling these beautiful waterman pen, and they`re 44...

BECK: And, look, it matches your outfit.

SIMS: I know. That wasn`t actually done...

BECK: How supermodel of you.

(CROSSTALK)

SIMS: ... but that wasn`t done on purpose. But you have to look. It`s a set of four. It`s a limited edition.

BECK: Wow.

SIMS: And it`s the four elements, and they`re $11,000 apiece.

BECK: I can`t tell how many $11,000 pens I have...

SIMS: Well, you`re going to have another one, because...

BECK: The problem is, I lose them.

SIMS: I got you one.

BECK: Shut up. It`s an $11,000 pen.

SIMS: Very beautiful.

BECK: Shut the hell up. Is it really?

SIMS: Yes, there`s 161 series. And the number two set is actually being auctioned off, and all the proceeds go back to the Whitney.

BECK: Well, I`ve got to have a supermodel on this show more often.

SIMS: Yes, you do.

BECK: Wow, thank you very much.

SIMS: Thank you so much.

BECK: They`re beautiful.

SIMS: They`re beautiful.

BECK: So are you...

SIMS: Thank you.

BECK: ... more on the inside than the outside.

SIMS: Thank you.

BECK: God bless you. Thank you.

(COMMERCIAL BREAK)

BECK: A lot of the hate mail has come in on "The Da Vinci Code." And, surprisingly enough, a very small amount of it is about Tom Hanks` haircut, which is weird.

Vickie writes in and says, "Hey Beck, on `The Da Vinci Code,` that movie is from the bowels of Hell, and every point of the movie can be smashed to Hell with facts and empirical data."

Thank you for your e-mail, Vickie. It has, you know, two extra Hells in it than I think it needed, but I have to admit: You`re right. In fact, several experts on "The Da Vinci Code" have come out and said, in no uncertain terms, that this movie is full of lies, full of deceptions, experts like what`s his name, Ron Howard.

(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)

RON HOWARD, DIRECTOR: If you`re going to be upset by this, a fictional film, don`t go see it. You know, you`re not obliged to.

(END VIDEO CLIP)

BECK: The lies!

And the preeminent expert on this, author of "The Da Vinci Code," Dan Brown.

(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)

DAN BROWN, AUTHOR, "THE DA VINCI CODE": A very vise British priest noted recently in the press: Christian theology has survived the writings of Galileo and the writings of Darwin. Surely it will survive the writings of some novelist from New Hampshire.

(END VIDEO CLIP)

BECK: Yes, but what do they know? And what did they mean, honestly?

My research on this program is tireless, and I want you to know that I went above and beyond the call of duty to find the definition of fiction. I typed it into Microsoft Word and then I pressed Shift-F7. And that brings up the thesaurus and similar words and phrases, like "invented story," "imaginary tale," "falsehood," "fantasy," "lie," "untruth," "fabrication," "A Million Little Pieces," "Michael Moore documentary," and "politicians saying they`re going to get tough on border control."

There`s so much anger about "The Da Vinci Code," and I don`t get it, man. Pop culture and the media in general, they never skip an opportunity to try to backhand Christianity. We all know that.

But sometimes us religious zealots really need to step back just a bit and take a deep breath and relax. You know, boycotting a stupid movie isn`t worth the hassle, and it really actually works against the cause, especially when it`s based on a book that you can buy in the same section as Harry Potter, another movie people are protesting.

Let`s save our religious zealot get-togethers for important stuff like backwards messages in rock music, and video games with too many explosions, and the Virgin Mary`s image in grilled cheese sandwich. That`s frightening.

You can mail your hate to GlennBeck@CNN.com. Don`t forget, on tomorrow`s show, country star Kenny Chesney. We`ll see you then, you sick freak.

END