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Denis Leary Sounds Off; Interview With Steve Harvey

Aired May 29, 2009 - 21:00   ET


JOY BEHAR, GUEST HOST: Tonight, Denis Leary and Steve Harvey -- two really funny guys get serious about the priest who wants to marry, "Jon and Kate Plus 8" and Britain's singing sensation, Susan Boyle.

Is she losing it or what?


DENIS LEARY: I hope she sings a song that has the F bomb all over it.


BEHAR: Denis Leary sounds off on that and why we should feel good about being fat, loud, lazy and stupid.

And then, comedian turned relationship expert, Steve Harvey, has the scoop on what women need to know about men.


STEVE HARVEY: Maybe you should check your husband's man card.




HARVEY: And you can roll the credits.


BEHAR: Good evening.

I'm Joy Behar sitting in for Larry tonight, while he make the rounds promoting his memoir, "My Remarkable Journey."

Denis Leary joins us tonight. He's an actor, comedian, a writer and director. He's the star and co-creator of "Rescue Me." Pretty impressive. Now, it's his fifth season on FX with that show. And his new book is the provocatively titled "Why We Suck

A Feel Good Guide to Staying Fat, Loud, Lazy and Stupid."

Welcome, Denis.

LEARY: Yes. That is my book. And it's -- it's actually being -- you know, they're giving it another push for Father's Day so it's

BEHAR: So it's being reissued again for Father's Day?

LEARY: Not reissued.


LEARY: It's still out. It's just -- you know, I guess I should say this, even though it sounds like I'm bragging -- because I am. It was on the best-seller list for six months. And now, just as it's coming off the best-seller list because Michael J. Fox and Larry King...

BEHAR: Oh, yes.

LEARY: ...and all these other great books are coming out, they're -- because it's a Father's Day book, I guess.

BEHAR: It's very funny. I was reading it before. I mean, it's funny.

LEARY: Well, thanks.

BEHAR: And do you think that we suck less or more since this book came out, as a people.

LEARY: As a people, I would have to say that -- you know, as a comedian you try -- I mean you know this...


LEARY: You try to -- you want to fly on both sides of the political fence because that's where the -- where the comedy is.

BEHAR: Right.

LEARY: But I do have to say that -- that I think that President Obama is the greatest president in the history of all of our presidents and that he can do no wrong in my book.


LEARY: So how am I -- so how's that for prejudice on the Democratic side?

BEHAR: It's hard to make jokes about Barack right now.

LEARY: I don't think it is. Because I just -- I did a tour -- a comedy tour with the "Rescue Me" guys, Lenny Clarke and Adam Ferrara. We went around the country pushing the rebirth of the show because we were off the air for a year-and-a-half.

And, truthfully, I mean I make fun of his smoking. I make fun of, you know, several things about him.

Niki Dipaolo, who is on "Rescue Me" and also was on the tour... BEHAR: Yes.

LEARY: ...made fun of his wife's arms. I mean there -- you know, doesn't matter who's in the White House...


LEARY: can find something to make fun of.

But I do have to say that I enjoy upsetting people -- friends of mine who might be in the Republican world by -- like Lanny Clark, who's on "Rescue Me."


LEARY: Who...

BEHAR: He's a right-winger?

LEARY: Well, he's a -- yes. He's a supporter -- he was a supporter of the previous eight years.

BEHAR: But...

LEARY: So I would love to wake up in the morning and go to work on "Rescue Me" and just go, President Obama is the greatest thing that ever happened, just to...

BEHAR: Just to torture him?


BEHAR: To torture him?


BEHAR: But wasn't it fun for the comedians to take on Bush all those years?

So it's hard to let go of those jokes.

LEARY: It was manna from heaven.

BEHAR: Manna.

LEARY: It really was.

BEHAR: Because, you know, this guy's a little harder. Of course, there's always Joe Biden.

LEARY: Oh, yes. Oh, my God.


BEHAR: What you...

LEARY: I mean how about the (INAUDIBLE)...

BEHAR: Do you have...

LEARY: How about the...

BEHAR: Do you have a good joke on Biden?

LEARY: I don't have a good joke right now. But I did -- I mean, I thought the swine flu thing was just, you know, his panic attack about swine flu...

BEHAR: Oh, I know.

LEARY: Like, don't get on the plane, don't eat bacon...

BEHAR: Yes, yes.

LEARY: ...don't talk to Mexicans, you know...


LEARY: I mean it's like, Joe, put -- I mean, he's always been that way, though. He can always get -- as smart as -- and well spoken and carefully chosen the words might be from President Obama, the vice president is guaranteed to just sort of go off the handle and say the opposite.

BEHAR: Yes. Well, but thank goodness.

LEARY: Can I say one thing that I, as a comedian, I went to the White House Correspondents Dinner.


LEARY: I've never been there before.

BEHAR: Oh, with...

LEARY: Yes. And -- and he killed. As comedians, we -- when we say killed, that means that...

BEHAR: Obama?

LEARY: Yes. He's got great timing. He slaughtered the crowd that night.

BEHAR: Yes, yes.

LEARY: And Wanda Sykes followed him.

BEHAR: Yes, Wanda Sykes.

LEARY: And Wanda -- and I'm telling you, as a comedian, if you were there, you would have had the butterflies in your stomach, because you're going this room is -- it's dead now.


LEARY: The president has just -- he -- everybody's done.

BEHAR: It was hard to follow him.

LEARY: And she killed.

BEHAR: She killed.

LEARY: She killed.

BEHAR: What about the controversy around what she said?

LEARY: She did a Rush Limbaugh joke.


LEARY: Big deal.

BEHAR: But they said that it was a joke about 9/11, not about Rush Limbaugh and that was the problem.

LEARY: It included 9/11, but it was basically a Rush Limbaugh joke, so...

BEHAR: I agree with that. I thought it was about Limbaugh, too. And he's -- there's open season on Limbaugh, I'm sorry.

LEARY: It's open season on all of us...

BEHAR: Everybody.

LEARY: ...if you're a public...

BEHAR: That's...

LEARY: ...if you're a public figure. But she was great. She was really...

BEHAR: Well, she caught a lot of flack. But I think it's died down now.

LEARY: Yes, but I was in the room. She was extremely funny. She was great.

BEHAR: What do you think of Obama's pick of Sotomayor?

LEARY: Fantastic.

BEHAR: You love her?

LEARY: Everything you ask me about President Obama I'm just going to say it's the greatest thing.

BEHAR: I know. Well, it's a little...

LEARY: I love the guy.

BEHAR: I know. But it's predictable at this point that we all love him.

LEARY: It really is. OK. So let me say this...

BEHAR: Say you hate him for a minute.

LEARY: OK. I hate him.


LEARY: But now I like him again.


LEARY: I -- I don't -- you know, I really don't know the ins and the outs. I just think it's fantastic that it's a woman. I think it's fantastic...

BEHAR: She's a Latina.

LEARY: The story with her mother...


LEARY: ...and the stepfather guy and...

BEHAR: But isn't it -- she's a Princeton graduate, I believe. She's got all sorts of sheepskins...

LEARY: Fantastic.

BEHAR: And yet they're still saying she's not smart enough.

LEARY: Listen...

BEHAR: Who are they comparing her to?

LEARY: Listen, even this network, which I watch quite a bit, let's be...


LEARY: Let's be dead honest about it. When you get, even with Wolf Blitzer's "SITUATION ROOM," OK...

BEHAR: Yes, which we love.

LEARY: OK, which we love.

BEHAR: You love.

LEARY: And, again, I just said I watch it all the time.

BEHAR: I do, too. LEARY: But it could be Anderson Cooper, who I also love.


LEARY: You get these experts on...

BEHAR: Right.

LEARY: ...and there's four people, there's two Democrats and there's two Republicans.

BEHAR: Right.

LEARY: And everybody's got a book, which is what I'm here to sell today. But everybody has got a book so you know -- I mean I love when they get these people on and they go, the president's the greatest thing that ever lived and the president's the best and the president's the -- it might as well be me talking about the president.

BEHAR: Right.

LEARY: Then they cut to the other person, who supposedly is not biased, going the president's horrible and Bush and Cheney were great.

BEHAR: Right.

LEARY: At this point, you know, it's like a bully pulpit for everybody.


LEARY: And I just think -- you know, it's hard to come down on whether -- who's right and when's wrong. I just go off the basic -- the things that make me happy. I'm from Massachusetts. I was raised by two Irish immigrants. When people start -- and I love Lou Dobbs. When he starts talking about the immigrant -- the illegal aliens, it could have been my parents in the '50s.

BEHAR: He would send them back.

LEARY: I know he would.


LEARY: Like, I wouldn't be here right now if Lou Dobbs was running the country or had that show in the 1950s, although I love Lou Dobbs.


LEARY: I'm just saying...

BEHAR: Well, free speech.

LEARY: ...a lot of this stuff, that's how I react to it, you know what I mean? I think she's great. I think her story is great.

BEHAR: Have something to say about this show or any other?

Go to and let us know. While you're there, check out our blog exclusives from Nicole Richie and Oprah's personal trainer, Bob Greene.

More with Denis after this.



LEARY: How about your affair with my brother and then you're having an affair with me while you're having an affair with my own -- my brother.


How about that?



UNIDENTIFIED MALE: Mayday! Mayday! You'd better get that bucket up here right now.


LEARY: Do you think I look like Kevin Bacon or Wayne Gretzky?


UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: This is it. It's the end of the line.

UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: It's a great show.


BEHAR: A fabulous show.

LEARY: Thanks.

BEHAR: "Rescue Me." You play a firefighter who has a lot of guilt.

LEARY: Yes and...

BEHAR: And I understand you have a personal connection to firefighters and 9/11.

Tell us what that is.

LEARY: Well, my cousin Jerry Lucey was a -- was a firefighter up in Worcester, Massachusetts. And 10 years ago, he was killed in a fire up there that killed six firefighters total, including him and a kid we grew up with, I went to school with, named Tommy Spencer.

And I originally started my foundation to help the families and the fire department up in Worcester. And then when 9/11 happened, the guy who's the technical adviser on "Rescue Me," Terry Quinn, is an old friend of mine. And he's still a firefighter in New York. And a couple other guys that I knew were killed that day.

So because the foundation was already in place, we were able to begin helping -- mostly with Terry's driving force, we started a thing called the Bash for New York's Bravest, which is now -- now we've turned it into the Comedy Bash. We did it at Radio City this year.

So we're in our ninth year -- or eighth year of that. And, you know, I mean...

BEHAR: You're doing great on the show. I mean, it's a big show. It's fabulous.

LEARY: Yes. We're very -- we're lucky, actually, because we -- we have a great cast. And without these firefighters -- without Terry and the guys -- we have a lot of real firefighters on the set. You know, that's where we get all of our great action sequences. And we literally write, sometimes, into the script, you know, exterior Manhattan brownstone fire and then see Terry Quinn. And Terry designs all the dialogue and all the action and everything that goes on so.

BEHAR: OK. Now, "Rescue Me" in now in its fifth season and getting rave reviews.

Here's a sneak peek from an upcoming episode.


LEARY: Listen, guys, I've got an announcement I'd like to make. I put a lot of thought into this. I'm just going to put it out there. I'm drinking again. Now, I know a couple of you guys, Lou and Mike, in particular, already have this information. But I want you guys to know, OK, I'm not an alcoholic. I think I was going through a rough patch and that's all. And now I'm drinking again. I can control it and, you know, in the spirit of the brotherhood and working together and being 100 percent clear, I want to put it out there on the table. I'm drinking again. I can control it. It's not going to be a problem.


UNIDENTIFIED MALE: You told Mikey before me?

LEARY: OK. Not on purpose. It was -- Sean...

UNIDENTIFIED MALE: Does this mean it's OK for everybody to know?

LEARY: Yes. No. Let me -- let me clarify. Mike, yes, I know... UNIDENTIFIED MALE: (INAUDIBLE).

UNIDENTIFIED MALE: I have to go to the bathroom.

LEARY: Oh. OK. You know what, do me a favor and don't tell Colleen (ph). I mean you can tell everybody else, but just don't tell Colleen.

UNIDENTIFIED MALE: Full disclosure.

LEARY: Full disclosure.


LEARY: Right.


LEARY: OK, Mike, you can go to the bathroom.


BEHAR: You know...


BEHAR: You know, Denis, I know you as a comic from the old days.


BEHAR: And do you -- did you really always want to be an actor underneath it all?

LEARY: That's how I started.

BEHAR: As an actor?

LEARY: I was -- I was...

Emerson, right?

LEARY: Yes. Well, before that, I was skipping a class. It was a nun -- there was an old nun. I forget her name now. She was so old that at the beginning of the class, if you raised your hand and said you had to go to the bathroom and she let you go, she would forget that you had gone so you could skip the rest of the class.


LEARY: So I went -- I raised my hand when I first got in. And there used to be a race amongst the guys in the back of the room to get your hand up first. And I was just walking around the hallways.

And Sister Rose Marie Sullivan grabbed me. And I thought I was going to get detention. But, in fact, she said I want to put you in "Mame," the high school musical. I was in like sixth grade at the time.

And I was like, I'm not going to do a musical. And then I found out that you got two hours out of regular school...

BEHAR: Aha. So you did it.

LEARY: So I did it. And then, of course, it was all high school girls. And, you know, you got to do dance numbers with them. So the nun would little say, you know, grab her rear-end and, you know, put your arm around her chest...

BEHAR: Really?

LEARY: And I was like, she's telling me to touch the girls. So that started my acting career.

And then when I got out of college, where I went -- I went to Emerson College to study acting and writing...

BEHAR: Right.

LEARY: ...a guy named Steven Wright who was, you know, one of the shyest guys in my class...

BEHAR: The comedian Steven Wright?


BEHAR: He was in your class?

LEARY: He was very shy and a great writer.


LEARY: He was working, I think, in a shoe store. And somebody said -- we all had jobs at that point. And somebody said, you know, Steven Wright's doing stand-up comedy?

And I went to this Chinese restaurant in Cambridge, Massachusetts called the Ding Ho. And Lenny Clarke, this madman, was -- was bringing people up -- all kinds of people. And Steven -- I saw Steven and I said, well, if he can do it...

BEHAR: Right.

LEARY: If Lanny can do it, I can do it.


LEARY: And that's how it started and...

BEHAR: People don't...

LEARY: ...I went back into acting from stand-up.

BEHAR: So it was -- you can do both. You obviously can do both. LEARY: Yes.

BEHAR: People don't really understand what we have to go through in the beginning. They used to turn -- when I started, they would take a bowling alley and turn it into a comedy club.

LEARY: Oh, yes. Yes, yes.

BEHAR: So you were speaking like this long, long hall. It's horrible.

LEARY: And some were like...

BEHAR: For 50 bucks.

LEARY: Yes. Well, remember the original airline Carolines was like -- was two hallways leading to a stage.

BEHAR: Yes, that's...

LEARY: Remember?

It was like you were on stage and there was -- one part of the room was here and the other part was down here.

BEHAR: I know.

LEARY: So -- but those are the things -- I don't know about comedy clubs now and the young guys coming up. But I think when we were coming up, it was like -- it was like just jumping into the fire. You had...

BEHAR: Jumping in. But we also had an advantage...

LEARY: You know...

BEHAR: ...because it was hot. Comedy was hot in the '80s.

LEARY: Yes. Yes.

BEHAR: You know, that was when Kinnison was coming up and...

LEARY: Yes. It was great.

BEHAR: And everybody was having a good old time.

LEARY: That's still my favorite thing to do. I just came off a tour. It's still my favorite...

BEHAR: To do stand-up?

LEARY: Stand-up is the best.

BEHAR: Well, you're in charge of everything. But it's the most anxiety producing, also, don't you think?



LEARY: But, I mean, you know, that thing where the curtain goes up at 8:00, you have the butterflies in your stomach. It's like playing sports. You get out there, you get your first contact or laugh.

BEHAR: Right.

LEARY: And then the...

BEHAR: And then you're home free.

LEARY: And it's just you and them.

BEHAR: I know.

LEARY: And it's the most democratic process in the world. It doesn't matter if you think it's funny.

BEHAR: Right.

LEARY: If they don't think it's funny, it's not funny.

BEHAR: That's right.

LEARY: And I love it, you know?

BEHAR: That's true. Nobody's around to say it's good or bad.

LEARY: No. It's them.

BEHAR: It depends on what they think.

LEARY: It's them.

BEHAR: I know. I always say that.

OK, you know, when we come back, I want to talk about, you know, Mel Gibson...


BEHAR: I want to talk about Susan Boyle.


BEHAR: So, anyway, who do you think is funny?

Is Denis Leary, Steve Harvey or me?

That's tonight's quick vote question.

That's not fair.

Go to CNN...

LEARY: I wonder when's going to win that contest.

BEHAR: That's not right. First of all, look, forget about it.

LEARY: You're going to win it.

BEHAR: Go to

LEARY: You have to win. You're the host.

BEHAR: Nah -- and cast your ballot.

Back in 60 seconds with Denis.

That is so wrong.


BEHAR: We're back talking to actor and author, Denis Leary.

LEARY: Author.

BEHAR: He stars in and helped create the series, "Rescue Me."

Here he is with his good buddy and guest star, Michael J. Fox.



MICHAEL J. FOX: If we're really going to be friends, then this is the kind of thing we should be able to talk about, you know?

LEARY: Yes, sure. I mean we -- you know.

FOX: I tell you, it's Janet. Since she came back from you guys visiting Katie at school...


FOX: It's been a little off.


FOX: Lately she hasn't been opening up to me in the way she normally does, if you know what I mean.


FOX: So I was wondering if you might be able to shed a little light on it for me.

Hey, did you guys have a dust-up or something?

LEARY: No. I don't think we had a dust-up. FOX: Well, it's something, right?

LEARY: You know, Dwight, I -- no. Everything was great. We had a...


LEARY: Dwight, look, you know, I'm trying to shoot straight with you here.

FOX: I'd appreciate that, bro.


BEHAR: You know, there's a lot of buzz on the show this year.

Do you think you're going to win an Emmy?

LEARY: Oh, I don't know. I mean I hate to get into all that kind of talk. But if we're going to talk, I mean Michael is an old friend of mine.


LEARY: And the part that he played -- and I think he did five episodes. And it was a dramatic role with comedy in it. And he was -- I just can't tell you how great he was. And a lot of this stuff -- I'm watching that scene and I'm thinking about all the stuff that he improvised.

BEHAR: Oh, really?

LEARY: He's really great. So if anybody is going to win an Emmy connected to the show, I mean, you know, he's a great actor. People -- he's a comedy icon, but he did a movie called "Casualties of War" years ago, with Sean Penn, where he played a dramatic role. And he was fantastic.

So I think people forget how -- how great of an actor he really is.


LEARY: And, of course, he doesn't have to act anymore, because he made so much money off of all those big giant comedy shows that he did.

BEHAR: Oh, really?

LEARY: Oh, yes. He co-created them.

BEHAR: Well, good for him.

LEARY: Yes, it's great for him.

BEHAR: Good for him. LEARY: It's good for him.

BEHAR: I hope that they can find something.

LEARY: He's so talented and happy. And I just...


LEARY: He's a remarkable guy.

BEHAR: He's a remarkable guy.


BEHAR: You never feel sorry for him, even though he's having a struggle.

LEARY: He won't allow it.

BEHAR: Because he doesn't allow it.


BEHAR: He's not like that.



BEHAR: More with Denis Leary when LARRY KING LIVE returns.

And the latest on Susan Boyle is coming up.



LEARY: I mean I feel insulted. Touching.

Where is it?

Where is it?

I'm going back to steal.

I'm going to hell for that bit.


LEARY: And you're all coming with me.

People with guns can do whatever they want. Married people without guns, for instance, you -- do not get to yell.


BEHAR: OK. We're back with Denis Leary.

You know, what do you think of this priest, Doctor -- Father Cutie?

He was a Roman Catholic. Now he's an Episcopalian, because they caught him making out on the beach.


BEHAR: What do you think?

LEARY: Of course, I have a chapter in my -- in my book about Catholicism and I spent 12 years -- I used to -- I like to say I did 12 years in the Catholic school system.

BEHAR: Right.

LEARY: Because it is like a jail, a prison sentence. And I am a very lapsed Catholic, which I'm on record as saying.

I can't -- this is, again, talking about George Bush. This is like comedy from God -- a priest who wants to get married named Father Cutie.

BEHAR: I know.

LEARY: I mean it doesn't get any -- and I know we're probably mispronouncing his name.

BEHAR: Cutie. It's Cutie.

LEARY: It's Cutie.

BEHAR: It's -- he's Spanish.

LEARY: But let's face it, for comedy reasons, it's Father Cutie.

BEHAR: Right.

LEARY: Now, listen.


LEARY: If I was going to rework the Catholic Church...


LEARY: I mean, I'm not the pope, but maybe I should be.


LEARY: I think all priests should be married. I think priests should be married. I think overnight, if priests are allowed to be married, you're going to get rid of all the sexual abuse. I think it's going to reorganize the church into the right way, which is you should go to church to celebrate and have a sense of community and a sense of shared trust and belief and faith. That's...

BEHAR: So then the gay priests should get married, too?

LEARY: I think they should be inclusive of -- but then the -- then gay marriage, why not?

BEHAR: Right.

Why not?

LEARY: You know what I mean?

BEHAR: Right.

LEARY: I mean I know gay -- gay people who aren't married who are better parents than some, you know, straight people I know who are married.

BEHAR: Or who have been together longer than...


BEHAR: ...longer than all of us.

LEARY: So I'm -- look, it, the Catholic Church, as far as I'm concerned, if they -- if they want to wake up and get into this century and have all the Father Cuties -- because there's a lot of them out there...


LEARY: ...get married, you know what I mean, and have relationships...

BEHAR: It's not going to happen, Denis.

LEARY: I know.

BEHAR: Let's not even go there.

LEARY: And you know why?

Because celibacy and...

BEHAR: Ah, whatever.

LEARY: ...protecting the land and...

BEHAR: They do what they do.

LEARY: They want -- it's an organization that's built on land ownership. That's why...

BEHAR: Yes, that's right.

LEARY: That's why they invented celibacy. BEHAR: I know.

LEARY: Celibacy did not come from the mouth of our lord. It came from somebody in the Catholic Church saying hey, look, these popes are having babies...


LEARY: And the babies grow up and they want land.

BEHAR: It came from the mouth of a real estate agent.

LEARY: Exactly.

BEHAR: So, anyway, what about Mel Gibson, speaking of Catholics...

LEARY: I know.

BEHAR: You know, he's getting a divorce...

LEARY: One of our most Catholics of Catholics.

BEHAR: Wait a second. He went on "The Tonight Show" the other night.

Did you see him with Jay Leno?

LEARY: No, I didn't see it.

BEHAR: He was on and he confirmed that his Russian girlfriend is pregnant. This is like just six weeks after the wife filed for divorce.


BEHAR: So what's the story with him?

LEARY: Can I just say this?


LEARY: First of all, I think Mel Gibson is an -- I don't know him.

BEHAR: A good actor.

LEARY: An incredible -- a fantastic actor.

BEHAR: Yes, very good.

LEARY: And a great director, by the way.

But, boy, would I have loved to have been a fly on the wall with all the other problems that have occurred in the marriage. And God knows, anybody can go through, you know, a problem, whether it's substance abuse or -- you know, we've all had our problems and our skeletons.

BEHAR: Yes. Yes.

LEARY: But, boy, that phone call about, honey, you know, my Russian girlfriend?

Well, guess what?

BEHAR: Preggers.

LEARY: Yes. It's not -- it couldn't have been a pretty situation.


LEARY: So I think it's -- if he has to be divorced and he's...

BEHAR: Well, there's a kind of a...

LEARY: He's in my ballpark, age-wise, right?

He's like 54 so...

BEHAR: Yes. He looks older than you.

LEARY: OK. Well, I'm just going to say, I think it's great that he's got a younger girlfriend.

BEHAR: I know. But the thing is, he was a super Catholic, you know, kind of like, you know, with his films and everything...

LEARY: He is. He's an...

BEHAR: ...and now he's...

LEARY: And this -- didn't they start their own branch...

BEHAR: ...completely throwing it in their face.

LEARY: They started their own branch of the Catholic Church.


LEARY: I think I'm going to start my own branch of the Catholic Church where everybody is named Father Cutie...


LEARY: ...and you have to have multiple wives. It's like the Mormons meet the Catholics.

How about that?


LEARY: That's a reality show, by the way. BEHAR: OK. And it's very funny.

Now, listen, I have one more question -- one more minute with you.


BEHAR: So I want to get in Susan Boyle.

LEARY: Susan Boyle.

BEHAR: What do you think of that?

She dropped the F bomb.

LEARY: I don't watch any of that...

BEHAR: She's freaking out.

LEARY: I don't watch "American Idol." I don't watch any of that stuff. But my...

BEHAR: She's not on "American Idol."

LEARY: I know. She's on the best...

BEHAR: "Britain's Got Talent."

LEARY: OK. I saw the video and I, like everybody else, I thought it was amazing. I think it's just terrific.

BEHAR: Right.

LEARY: And she looked like a hobbit. She came out, she sang. And now she gets a slight makeover...

BEHAR: She looks good now.

LEARY: Yes, now she looks great. And they're all making...


LEARY: They're all making, you know, she shouldn't get a makeover and this.

No, listen, I hope she sings a song that has the F bomb all over it.


LEARY: I'd love to sing her -- have her sing a song that has the F bomb in it.

How about that song "Creep" by Radiohead...

BEHAR: Yes. LEARY: ...that has the F bomb in it?

BEHAR: Oh, yes.

LEARY: Or anything. She's got a great voice.

BEHAR: You know what has the F bomb in it?

(singing): You're beautiful. You're beautiful.


BEHAR: That you listen to one version of it. LEARY: And, by the way...

BEHAR: Oh, yes.

LEARY: I think Susan Boyle is a great singer and I would not want to upset her, because she looks like she could really knock your -- your block off.

BEHAR: Well, it's interesting now. She was like a -- sort of a, you know, kind of unassuming and scared. And now she's dropping the F bomb. I mean she's...

LEARY: Yes, but, you know, she came from...

BEHAR: It's show biz.

LEARY: ...she came from nowhere and now people are, you know, assaulting her daily on a -- you know, there's pictures of her all over the place.

BEHAR: Yes. I don't know if she can handle it.

LEARY: I know who she is and I don't even watch that show.


LEARY: I think she's great. And I hope...

BEHAR: But, you know what, it's almost like a kid going into show business...

LEARY: I say...

BEHAR: ...that can't handle it.

LEARY: I say cage match -- her, Simon Cowell, you know, ultimate fighting...

BEHAR: And Paula Abdul.

LEARY: ...for charity.

BEHAR: OK. LEARY: Paula could be like one of the -- one of the coaches or something.

BEHAR: I thought -- they're wonderful. You're wonderful.

LEARY: Yes, yes, yes.

BEHAR: Yes, yes.




BEHAR: Isn't this fun?

LEARY: This is a blast.


LEARY: Are you going to hold my book up again?

BEHAR: Yes. Here's his book.

LEARY: Because, you know, Steve Harvey is going to come out and...

BEHAR: It's really terrific.

LEARY: And his book is selling better than mine...

BEHAR: "Why We Suck."

LEARY: "Why We Suck."


LEARY: And I've said this before, but it makes a great coaster.

BEHAR: It does make a lovely coaster.

LEARY: I don't know why.

BEHAR: And a hat.

LEARY: And it's a...

BEHAR: A lovely hat.

LEARY: ...a lovely hat.

BEHAR: And I want to remind you about Larry's prime time exclusive Monday. Lisa Ling is here to talk about her sister. Lisa Ling, my old pal from "The View." Her sister is imprisoned in North Korea with fellow journalist Euna Lee. Families of both women will be here to speak about this very difficult situation.

That's Monday on LARRY KING LIVE.

Next, speaking of Susan Boyle, is she feeling the stress?

The latest on her quest for fame and fortune and the bad effect it may be having on her, after this.


BEHAR: Welcome back to LARRY KING LIVE.

There are reports that "Britain's Got Talent" discovery, Susan Boyle, is cracking under the pressure of competition.

Joining us from England is judge Piers Morgan.

Piers, talk to me.

How are you?


BEHAR: Is Susan losing it?

MORGAN: Very well.

No, she's OK. She's just had a pretty rough week because I think the full enormity of what has happened to her is beginning to hit home. And as with all these things, along with global fame has come the -- the odd bit of negative press now and a bit of sniping and a bit of jealousy, I think, from certain people.

And it's all been bubbling up and it got to her. And earlier this week, she had a lot of tears. And, actually, at one stage, she was going to leave the show. So, fortunately, we've calmed everything down. But it's been a pretty rough week for her.

BEHAR: Yes. But she's been dropping, as they say, the F bomb, partly because, I think, it has to do with something that you did, actually.

MORGAN: Yes. Well, I think people...

BEHAR: You said -- yes, tell -- tell us about that.

MORGAN: I think people might be slightly exaggerating this. I think that there were a couple of incidents. One involved some journalists where she had a bit of an angry exchange with them. The other one, she was accused of looking at a rival contestant on the next night's show and, seeing me praise that contestant, she apparently swore and walked off.

She denies doing that, by the way. And I don't know. I wasn't there. I would find it a strange thing for her to do, because Susan is really not like that and she certainly isn't disrespectful to other contestants. And I think they would...

BEHAR: No. No, but...

MORGAN: ...I think they've spun that a bit.

BEHAR: Well, the quote that I have -- I don't know if you said that but you said that was the singing performance we have seen so far in the semi finals referring this 12-year-old contestant.

MORGAN: Yeah. I meant it.

BEHAR: Don't you think that was a little bit insulting to her, don't you think?

MORGAN: Well, not really. This was Shaheen Jafargholi and the reality is that the two performances, everyone saw from Susan's semi final, that she missed her first big note and so she made an obvious note and Shaheen sang an almost perfect rendition of his song and comparing them from a purely musical point of view, which I was, I felt that he gave the stronger performance of the two performances. However, that's not to take into account the drama and emotion of Susan's performance and the fact that by actually missing the first note and recovering so well, she gave a magnificent performance but Shaheen was technically better on the night of the two performances.

BEHAR: I see. She just took it -- she's sensitive to that kind of comment. Now Susan's performance in the semifinals was criticized as being too pitchy at the start. Then she recovered nicely. Take a look.



BEHAR: OK. She ended up really well. Did -- were you worried about her that her dreams would be dashed if she didn't hit those notes?

MORGAN: Yeah. I mean, it was a heart stopping moment when she first missed that really big note at the start and we thought oh no, this is going to be the end of Susan Boyle. But I think she showed her fighting spirit by coming back so strongly.

BEHAR: I heard that you took her out on a date? My spies at LARRY KING LIVE tell me you asked her for a date while you were here.

MORGAN: I did. I didn't have the date but I had the kiss funny enough because she was so excited after finishing the semi finals the other day she ran backstage, jumped into my arms and planted a full smacker on my lips so I may have broken her duck (ph) there which I must say is quite an honor.

BEHAR: You know what, all I say is you cannot judge a book by the cover. This woman has changed, changed, changed. So thanks very much, Piers, for talking to us. MORGAN: It's a pleasure. And I wish her all the best and I know all of America will be watching and hoping that she can do another great performance.

BEHAR: And tell Susan we wish her good luck from the United States.

MORGAN: I most certainly will. She'll love that. Thank you so much.

BEHAR: You're welcome. Bye-bye.

MORGAN: Bye-bye.

BEHAR: OK. Steve Harvey joins us next answering a lot of your relationship questions. So don't go away.


BEHAR: Welcome back. Steve Harvey has made a name for himself as a stand-up comedian. He's one of the kings of comedy. He has a nationally syndicated radio show, "The Steve Harvey Morning Show" and now he's a relationship expert. Steve is the author of "Act Like a Lady, Think Like a Man." Here it is. Wonderful. Welcome to the show, Steve.

STEVE HARVEY, COMEDIAN: Joy, how you doing? Glad to be here.

BEHAR: Good to see you again.

HARVEY: This is pretty big for me.

BEHAR: This is big for you?

HARVEY: Solo moment on the LARRY KING SHOW. This is pretty hot.

BEHAR: Do you wish that Larry were here instead of me? I wouldn't blame you.

HARVEY: I love you. You know how big a fan of mine I am of yours? Plus we're the same. Both of us do the same thing for a living.

BEHAR: Because we're comics you mean?

HARVEY: That's it. That's that bond. I love that.

BEHAR: And Denis, too, it's like it just clicks.

HARVEY: This is the first time I met him all these years. First time I met him, hugged him.

BEHAR: That was sweet.

HARVEY: That was good, you know. BEHAR: I want to go right to the book. I was reading it. Things you say in there are fascinating to me. You say men cheat because women allow them to. Elaborate.

HARVEY: I mean, you know, look. Women ask that question all the time.

BEHAR: Yeah.

HARVEY: That's one of the biggest questions, why do men cheat but it's really because there's so many women out there willing to cheat with them. That's really one of the basic causes. That doesn't excuse a guy at all.


HARVEY: Because really, you've got vows, you've got commitments.

BEHAR: You've got a ring.

HARVEY: Yeah, you've got all that that you're supposed to pay attention to but it's just so many women out there that don't have the standards in line and everything and a guy comes along, you know, I mean, goes all the way back to the beginning of time. You know? Eve was a pretty powerful lady. You know, she kind of set this thing off in the beginning and we've been pretty vulnerable to that the whole time.

BEHAR: Did Adam cheat on Eve? I don't think so.

HARVEY: He wasn't supposed to do anything ...

BEHAR: There was a snake in the area.

HARVEY: He brought the apple into it.

BEHAR: The apple.

HARVEY: She was naked. You know? A naked woman with a piece of fruit, that's ...

BEHAR: That's quite tempting.

HARVEY: That's pretty much -- I'm in. I'm in. That's hard as I would try, a naked woman and a fruit.

BEHAR: If it wasn't for these little -- how shall we call them? Tramps? Who are coming on to our husbands, then the men wouldn't cheat. Is that your point?

HARVEY: They would still find a reason to cheat. Not every man cheats.

BEHAR: No, I know that. I don't think they do.

HARVEY: Because there are a lot of great guys out there. BEHAR: Right.

HARVEY: But the chances are increased when -- if women don't keep their standards high.

BEHAR: I see.

HARVEY: That's pretty much what I try to explain to women in the book. I wrote the book, you know, to empower women.

BEHAR: Right.

HARVEY: To give women -- here's a deal. We all think that this relationship thing is a game out here. All I'm saying to women is, OK. If it's a game, here are the rules that we play by. I'm going to teach you the rules in this book, then I am going to give you a playbook of how to play back to the guy the game he's playing so you can get better results for yourself.

BEHAR: OK. So give me some of the rules. Just give me one or two rules.

HARVEY: Well, first thing I want women to understand is how men really are.

BEHAR: Right.

HARVEY: That's what you really got to get to.

BEHAR: And how are they?

HARVEY: Like first of all, you've got to know what drives a man. You know? It's who we are. What we do. And how much we make.

BEHAR: That's what drives a man.

HARVEY: That's what drives us. We all wake up to do the thing that we do, to earn a title and a place with what we do and make money. Because if we organize those three things in our life, then we feel as men that more of you are available to us because we've gotten it together. We've determined who we are, what we do ...

BEHAR: What does it mean, who we are? Speak specific. What do you mean?

HARVEY: OK. For example. What we do. I'm a stand-up.

BEHAR: Right. That I get.

HARVEY: That's what I do. But who am I? Where in the stand-up world do I fit? Do I have "The Steve Harvey Show"? Am I Steve Harvey the headliner, am I the opening act, the feature act? Do I get corporate gigs, do I just work colleges? Am I a star? Am I a nobody?

BEHAR: What if you work for Department of Sanitation, how does that fit in there? HARVEY: You have to get a title. You going to be the driver, you going to be the guy hanging on the back of the truck.

BEHAR: I see.

HARVEY: Picking up the sanitation.

BEHAR: So your role, your role in the world.

HARVEY: You got to get that tightened up. And it doesn't matter. Every guy's working on the who he is inside of the what he does.

BEHAR: I see.

HARVEY: And all of that determines how much you make and then once you get those three things lined up, then you feel as though you have got a shot at getting the woman of your dreams. You want to become appealing to women and you know you got to get that part of it together. A woman has to understand that, so a lot of times when a guy is a working hard on the job, women have a tendency to think he's putting me second behind the job. He is really not but he's got to get that part of his life together in order to be all that you need him to be.

BEHAR: OK. I like this other thing. You say that the perfect man, I guess is a combination gay man, old guy, ugly guy, and a mandingo. Sounds like a horny guy who watches "The View."

HARVEY: I've been on "The View."

BEHAR: Who are these people that you're describing?

HARVEY: here is the deal. What I actually say in the book is, sometimes women have to -- have been over the course of time had to combine men to get the man of their dreams. You know, you want to ...

BEHAR: The idea that you have to kiss a lot of frogs to meet the handsome prince?

HARVEY: You have had to combine guy dos get the man of your dreams. Women say it's difficult to find a complete man and so they end up, you know, you make friends with an old guy. You know? You got an old guy who becomes a sugar daddy. He comes in and provides you with the income help that you need. He is not going to ask you for anything because he just wants to stick around.

BEHAR: He just wants sex maybe if he can do it.

HARVEY: Probably not.

BEHAR: OK. That's sad.

HARVEY: He's that old. So you get the old guy in your life. Then you get this -- an ugly guy. You get a ugly guy come along. And guess what he don't want to ask you for nothing because he don't want you to put him out. He can't get in a lot of houses anyway. So here's this guy just hanging around hoping you hang around.

BEHAR: That's so sad.

HARVEY: He becomes a great role model for the little boy. Takes your kids to the park. Pushes them in the swing. All that's going great. Then you get you the big mandingo guy.

BEHAR: The mandingo. Tell me about the mandingo.

HARVEY: The guy to come along and just really make it all right for you.

BEHAR: I see.

HARVEY: Pretty much knows how to fry the bacon just the way you like it.

BEHAR: I got you. And the last one?

HARVEY: And the last one just get a gay guy.

BEHAR: A gay guy. To help you decorate? What?

HARVEY: That loves to talk. He don't want anything. He just wants to talk to you.

BEHAR: So before I take a break, that means I should find four guys or one guy that has all of those elements?

HARVEY: Well, to keep you from having to get all of these four guys to combine into one guy that you want, what I teach you in the book is how to find the one guy with all of these qualities to give you what you want so you don't have to go through that.

BEHAR: This is a very valuable piece of literature.

HARVEY: I've got to tell you it is.

BEHAR: And Steve will answer your relationship questions. See you in 60 seconds. Don't go away.


JOHN KING, CNN HOST: Ahead on 360 tonight, President Obama defends his choice for Supreme Court against a rising tide of criticism. The latest details.

And North Korea continues to challenge the United States saying it tested another missile today. Former Secretary of State Madeleine Albright who has visited the secret state shares her insights in the 360 interview tonight.

And 21-year-old American exchange student Amanda Knox is on trial for murder in Italy. Tonight, a 360 exclusive. Her father is speaking out. Those stories and more ahead on 360. BEHAR: We're back with Steve Harvey. His every day observations of us all cut across racial and gender lines. Here he is from his latest DVD, "Still Tripping." Watch.


HARVEY: You been following this story about these polygamists?

That is so not a black story right there. A polygamist? A man got more than one wife? Fellows, you sitting next to her right now. Go home this evening and tell this crazy heifer you sitting next to, you're fixing to bring four or five more of them to the house tomorrow and see how long this -- you can roll -- This story over. This story -- you can roll the credits. You ain't got to wait for details at 11, you and them heifers going to get killed.


BEHAR: You seem to love stand-up, huh? You live it.

HAREY: It's the best.

BEHAR: Denis too, he loves it.

HARVEY: What else is better than that? You're free.

BEHAR: You're free.

HARVEY: There are no sponsors. There is no critics.

BEHAR: Nobody interrupting you.

HARVEY: And I can just say -- and they paid to hear this. So it really opens it up for you.

BEHAR: It is a great thing to make money making people laugh. It's a great thing.

HARVEY: It's an amazing blessing from God, it really is.

BEHAR: Which reminds me, speaking of God, you say in the book that you wouldn't go out with a woman, I guess, a woman should not go out with a man that doesn't believe in God.

HARVEY: No, I mean, why would you?

BEHAR: Do you believe that only people who are religious are ethical and moral?

HARVEY: No. I just believe if you don't believe in God, then where is your moral barometer? That's just me talking. You can believe what you want to believe. But if you're an atheist, you're basing the goodness and morality on what? I mean, but what is an atheist? I don't really get into that. I've talked the people all the time. I'm an atheist. I just walk away. I don't know what to say to you. BEHAR: Well, an atheist is someone that doesn't quite believe that there is somebody out there, some God out there.

HARVEY: Well then to me you're an idiot.

BEHAR: OK. Well ...

HARVEY: I'm cool with that. Probably not the right politically correct thing to say but if you don't believe in God, I mean, really, you have to have an explanation for this. You can't just tell me it spun out of a gastrous (ph) ball and then all of a sudden we were evolved from monkeys. Why we still got monkeys? There is too much open. I just believe that and if you don't believe that, then I don't like talking to you.

BEHAR: I see. OK. Listen. Listen. It's fine with me.

HARVEY: Can you say that on Larry King?

BEHAR: You can say it on any show. It is a free country.

HARVEY: It is.

BEHAR: OK. Steve's sticking around and don't you go anywhere.


BEHAR: We sent our King Cam out. Our King Cam out to find people who wanted relationship advice from Steve Harvey. Here's our first question.


UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: Hi. My name is Debbie DeHunt (ph). How do you get your husband to stop nagging you?


BEHAR: Oh, very good question.

HARVEY: Wow. Her husband nags?

BEHAR: Yeah.

HARVEY: That's new. That's -- woo.

BEHAR: Did you pick up my socks. Where's my laundry. How come you didn't clean today? That's nagging.

HARVEY: OK. Stop doing it. Let him pick it up. Let him kick the food. It's kind of like a little strike you go on. You're nagging because I didn't do it. Quit doing it and let him do it. That's new for me. I'm just going to be honest with you.

BEHAR: You're taking, if I may be so bold, a sexist position that only women are nags. Not for nothing, Steve, but that's what I'm hearing.

HARVEY: Maybe. Maybe the position I'm hearing is maybe you should check your husband's man card.

BEHAR: His man card?

HARVEY: Maybe he's not the rough and tough and tumble guy you thought you married. What's he nagging for? Because men aren't supposed to nag is what I'm saying.

BEHARY: But, they do.

HARVEY: I don't ...

BEHAR: They do. When you refer to a horse as a nag, is it always a female horse?

HARVEY: No. I never say nagging. I think that nagging is a term that men created to get women to pipe down some. But, it's a trap that we've created. We created several terms for women to back you down. Nagging means to stop asking me questions, then we get away with more. I think it's a term men created. That's why it's very rare when I hear that. It's like the term gold digger. No woman came up with that. I'm a gold digger. We came up with it so we could take you out without you expecting us to pay.

BEHAR: We shouldn't really pay attention to those terms?

HARVEY: No. Ignore that. See how I worked right through that?

BEHAR: That was good. You really worked your way out of that one.


BEHAR: We have another King Cam question. The King Cam is sticking in my teeth. It's from a young woman with a bedroom issue. Oh, let's hear that.


UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: Hi, Steve. My name is Siyah (ph). My boyfriend right here is always stealing the covers. It makes me crazy and leaves me cold. Please give me advice. What can I do about this?


BEHAR: What do you think you work for Serta and Sealy? What kind of question is that?

HARVEY: And you care that he's stealing your covers. That's not a relationship problem. At least he's in your bed stealing your covers. Your relationship problem would be if he was in somebody else's bed getting someone else's covers.

BEHAR: That is so well put. HARVEY: Or if he's taking your cover to cover another girl. Then you've got a problem. I don't really think that is a problem.

BEHAR: This a happy problem.

HARVEY: This is like greatness. My wife takes the covers off me all the time.

BEHAR: Let me ask you about that 90 day rule you have in the book. You say when you meet a guy, you should not have sex with him for 90 days.


BEHAR: Where did you come up with 90 days?

HARVEY: From Ford Motor Company.

BEHAR: Could you explain that?

HARVEY: Ford Motor Company, the Post Office, FedEx, UPS.

BEHAR: It's all 90 days.

HARVEY: They all have a probationary period. Every job you go to, you work there 90 days before you get the benefit package. And they use 90 days because in that 90, Ford can determine if you get along with others, if you do what you say you're going to do. If you're going to come to work on time. If you are easy to work with. If you are worthy of the benefit package.

Women have the greatest benefit package of them all, themselves, your body. Your affection, your time, your caressing.

BEHAR: Your brain.

HARVEY: The way you wear your hair. Your brain, we don't really count. Guys don't do that. We just look and wow. And here we come. We don't care if you're an idiot. If you look good, we're coming. We'll discover later on we are the one that are stupid.

BEHAR: I see.

HARVEY: We come at you for the biggest benefit package of them all. Why do women pass out their benefit package before Ford, FedEx, UPS or the Post Office> Why would you give it out your benefit package to some guy who hasn't proven he well with others, he hasn't proven he's going to do what he's said he's going to do, he hasn't shown you that he is going to show up in time. You don't know about the guy but here you are just passing it out.

BEHAR: But what if you feel like giving your benefit package away?

HARVEY: Well, guess what? You're not looking for a committed relationship and this book is not for you. BEHAR: Exactly. It's a different book.



HARVEY: This book is for somebody who wants something substantial in their life.

BEHAR: All right. If you have a message for Steve or Larry or me, go to Click on "blog" and start typing. We love hearing from you. Back with Steve after this.


BEHAR: OK. We are back with Steve Harvey. Let me ask you something, do you watch the show, "Jon and Kate," they are on the TLC, they've got - it's a reality show. They've got a bunch of kids ...

HARVEY: Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

BEHAR: They are having problems as a married couple. Do you have any advice for them?

HARVEY: What's their problem?

BEHAR: I think he's been cheating or some kind of thing going on there. They have a bunch of kids. They have eight kids, I think.

HARVEY: Kind of a Sherri Shepard type thing happening to me, Joy. I was just on "The View" with you and we went over this.

BEHAR: Well, he says -- Jon says he's not cheating. But she suspects it I guess.

HARVEY: Suspected and is he cheating or not.

BEHAR: Let's say you suspect that your husband is cheating. What should you do? Let's try that.

HARVEY: Can I be honest with you.

BEHAR: Yeah, of course. No, lie to me.

HARVEY: A woman really knows. God has given you this incredible instinct called intuition.

BEHAR: Yeah.

HARVEY: You actually know. You just ask other people so you can get verification. But what do you need verification of something you already know for. If you suspect your guy cheating it's because you've noticed a behavior pattern in the guy. And women pick up on it right away.

BEHAR: What should we look for? HARVEY: You know that better than me.

BEHAR: If they start wearing cologne, they lose weight, take four showers a day.

HARVEY: If your man comes home and only has his drawers on one leg ...

BEHAR: That's a given.

HARVEY: That's a good a sign he might be out there a little bit.

BEHAR: All right. Here's a Tweet. We got a Twitter or Tweeter, whatever they call it these days.

"Do you think marriage vows should eliminate the till death do us part thing?"

HARVEY: How long do you want yours to last?

BEHAR: Some people feel like maybe they should have a shelf life for marriage. Go like 30 years, then start over and get another one. What do you think of that?

HARVEY: Don't get married then.

BEHAR: Don't get married?

HARVEY: Just come up with an agreement. Hey look, we are going to hang out for five years, then hey, talk to you and see how it works. That would be a disaster.

BEHAR: My friend Whoopi, she says she likes the idea of renewing vows every few years. Because then you have to look at each other and decide if you want to go ahead with the next phase. Do you like that idea?

HARVEY: That's a good idea, but if we lie to you the first time, we have no problem lying to you again. If you want to hear us lie again we can go down there. I can hold your hand and we can do it again, you know.

BEHAR: OK. You are just wonderful. Thank you so much for coming on.

HARVEY: You have really taken me somewhere else with this.

BEHAR: I love you. You are so funny.

And Larry -- Larry King will be back Monday with Lisa Ling whose sister and fellow journalist Euna Lee are imprisoned in North Korea. It's sure to be a powerful hour.

Time now for John King and ANDERSON COOPER 360.