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Joy Behar Page
Tiger in Turmoil; Interview With Mo`Nique
Aired December 15, 2009 - 21:00 ET
THIS IS A RUSH TRANSCRIPT. THIS COPY MAY NOT BE IN ITS FINAL FORM AND MAY BE UPDATED.
JOY BEHAR, HOST: Tonight on THE JOY BEHAR SHOW, Tiger Woods` private life remains public. We have yet another alleged mistress today and this one is pushing 50. Does Tiger have a cougar?
And call girl turned advice columnist Ashley Dupre will be here to discuss anything. Oh, she`s like "Dear Abby" with a whip.
Then two days after Chris Brown`s CD sales Twitter tirade, Rihanna displays her wares on a fabulous cover for "GQ" magazine. Hey Chris...
Plus, from the new movie "Precious", actress and comedian Mo`nique joins me to talk about her Golden Globe nomination.
All this, starting now.
In his last interview before the bimbo eruption, Tiger Woods said that family comes first. He sure has a funny way of showing it.
Here to give us the lowdown on the latest in Tiger-land Lauren Sanchez from "Extra". Hey Lauren.
LAUREN SANCHEZ, "EXTRA": How are you doing? Yes, that interview is kind of coming back to bite him. The interviewer asked him, what`s the most important thing? And he said family first, golf second; family always first.
And another thing I thought was interesting that he said in that interview is that he`s using his time management skills he learned at Stanford University to apply that to being a father, a husband, and a golfer. And with 14 mistresses and all the rest, I think he`s using it very well.
BEHAR: He`s been very busy.
We just got new video of Tiger Woods talking about his family. It was in an interview with Sky TV in New Zealand taped just days before the scandal over his infidelity exploded.
Listen to the promotion for the interview in which sports broadcaster Murray Deeker (ph) asked Woods about his priorities.
(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)
UNIDENTIFIED MALE: This is the man who had it all.
TIGER WOODS, PRO GOLFER: It`s been great actually. It`s been the best that`s ever happened.
UNIDENTIFIED MALE: Fame, fortune and family.
WOODS: They got my wife and stuff...
UNIDENTIFIED MALE: A man unaware that very soon fate would make his answers sound like lies.
UNIDENTIFIED MALE: Family first and golf second.
Always be like that?
WOODS: Always.
(END VIDEO CLIP)
BEHAR: Are you excited to see this interview?
SANCHEZ: Well, I`m excited to see more of it. I think it`s a great tease. It`s the last interview he did before everything just collapsed.
And right now, Tiger`s popularity, according to all the Gallup polls, is plummeting and his sponsors are basically either re-evaluating their relationship with him or they`re just dropping him all together.
And now mistress number 14...
BEHAR: Fourteen, we`re up to.
SANCHEZ: If we`re keeping a tally here, 14 majors, 14 mistresses, coincidence? I don`t know? Theresa Rogers, she just came out and she...
BEHAR: Oh, yes, that`s the woman who`s in her late 40s.
SANCHEZ: Everyone is calling her a cougar, and they`re saying all types of things to that effect. But she`s saying that she actually had a relationship before Tiger was married and during his marriage.
And another interesting thing about Theresa is she hired attorney Gloria Allred.
BEHAR: Oh, but we this photo of a woman they say Tiger`s girlfriend was 48-year-old allegedly from Radar Online. There she is.
SANCHEZ: Yes, there she is.
BEHAR: We`ve reached out to both the Woods people and this woman but have not been able to confirm she`s indeed a mistress. This woman is in her 40s. Does that surprise you at all?
SANCHEZ: Well, I mean, they met a long time ago, so I think the relationship has been ongoing, if it is happening. But I mean, yes, because all the rest of the girls are obviously, I think 30 and younger. So yes, it`s a little surprising. But apparently he`s an equal opportunity cheater, apparently. He likes young ones, he likes them older and I`m not quite sure.
BEHAR: He just likes girls, I think. What about his wife Elin; she`s been seen without her wedding band. Are we supposed to make something of that or is it just a coincidence?
SANCHEZ: The first time we saw her she was pumping gas. And today she was out with both her children. She took them to lunch; she was with two other people who have not been identified. Yes, she`s not wearing her ring.
Is she trying to make a statement? Of course, she is. She is making a statement. She`s been seen without Tiger and she`s like, listen, I`m not wearing my wedding ring. She holds all the cards right here.
BEHAR: Yes, she sure does. It will be interesting to see what she does and what Tiger does. You know he still hasn`t come out of hiding. And nobody knows where he is. Nobody.
BEHAR: Ok. Thanks, Lauren. Thank you very much.
SANCHEZ: Thanks Joy.
BEHAR: I want to turn now to someone now who knows a little something about fame and sex scandals. And no, it`s not Mark Sanford. Ashley Dupre, the escort in the affair that brought down former New York Governor Eliot Spitzer and now an advice columnist for "The New York Post".
Welcome Ashley to the show.
ASHLEY DUPRE, FORMER ESCORT TO GOV. ELIOT SPITZER: Joy how are you?
BEHAR: When you were listening to that, you were saying it`s crazy. What do you think?
DUPRE: I think it`s crazy. I mean, 14 -- we`re up to 14 now. This is a man that clearly, who knows why he`s even gone outside his marriage? It could be a problem that he`s had in his childhood, not maturing. It could have been his father. It could have been something that`s gone on with the marriage. Who knows? We really don`t know a lot about that.
BEHAR: Well, it looks as though he was very stifled as a child. It was all about golf and performing and like that. So he`s acting out maybe.
DUPRE: Absolutely.
BEHAR: But a lot of these guys, when you were in the life -- that`s how you do it, right -- you have to understand that I`m a very -- I was like a real -- like I did nothing. I was married. Even now I`m with the same guy for 100 years. The most interesting thing we do in bed is eat cereal. So that`s where I`m at, just to tell you that.
So you`re like -- I`m interested in the things that you were into at that time. You were a very, very young girl I know that.
DUPRE: Absolutely.
BEHAR: But you know, I have to ask you this question. As a call girl -- or whatever -- was that ok to call you that?
DUPRE: Absolutely.
BEHAR: I always think of women who were in that situation, the guy comes in, he`s paying you money, so you have to do it. What if he`s like really gross? Like he has hair coming out of his nose, his ears, he smells funny?
DUPRE: You can leave. You don`t have to -- if I put myself in a situation, I don`t have to stay there.
BEHAR: You don`t?
DUPRE: I can leave. Absolutely.
BEHAR: Are you polite when you leave? Or do you say you`re very gross?
DUPRE: Of course, no, I`m not mean. I`m sorry this isn`t working out.
BEHAR: So you just walk out?
DUPRE: Absolutely.
BEHAR: If they ask you to do something you really don`t feel comfortable doing...
DUPRE: No. You have total control.
BEHAR: So you were with Eliot Spitzer a long time with Eliot, right?
DUPRE: I have -- my attorney advised that I cannot talk about that.
BEHAR: Oh, you can`t talk about him?
DUPRE: No, I can`t.
BEHAR: But I can.
DUPRE: Yes, you can. Go ahead, I`m just going to stay here. Go ahead Joy.
BEHAR: He spent a lot of money and he was -- well, whatever.
Let`s move on from him anyway.
DUPRE: I love you Joy.
BEHAR: Tiger was cheating at the beginning of his marriage. And Eliot Spitzer is an example of someone who is paying for it. It`s kind of different. A person who (INAUDIBLE) teach the way Tiger was doing and then the way Eliot Spitzer was doing it. What is the difference in the psychology of the man?
DUPRE: I think that with Spitzer, it was more of a power thing. Here`s this man that firmly believes he`s very against escort agencies and he`s pulling then down, and then there`s the man -- that Tiger who I think he was just doing it because he could.
BEHAR: Tiger?
DUPRE: Yes.
BEHAR: But I don`t understand. He could have gone to a prostitute and nobody would have known the story. You never snitched on Eliot Spitzer.
DUPRE: Who knows why Tiger -- I don`t think Tiger knows why he`s done what he`s done. I think he needs to go to therapy. I think his wife needs to go the therapy independently and then I think they need to go to therapy together.
And they need to -- if they can make the relationship work, I believe in love and forgiveness but not at the cost of your sanity. If she`s going to not be able to trust him and every time a text message comes in or a phone rings she`s going to feel really insecure about herself, she needs to leave, get divorced, start her life over because it`s really not worth her sanity.
BEHAR: A lot of women feel that the Mark Sanford situation is much more wounding to the wife because he says it`s his soul mate. And Mrs. Sanford, to her credit, has dumped him. Because he said, "I`ve met my soulmate."
A man who goes out with a bunch of mistresses like Tiger...
DUPRE: They`re pathological liars and they do it just because they can.
BEHAR: What is the difference -- what about a man who goes and pays for it?
I respect a woman who works for a living frankly. These other girls, I think are just home wreckers. It`s almost like you`re going to go to a prostitute, you want to do that, you pay for it. Everybody knows the deal.
DUPRE: Yes, but that -- ok, so that`s anonymously. But they`re not dealing with the real issue is, it`s the breakdown in communication between the husband and the wife.
BEHAR: Even when a man goes to a prostitute?
DUPRE: Absolutely. He should be going to his wife and they should be able to talk to each other.
BEHAR: Maybe the wife doesn`t want to do what the prostitute would do.
DUPRE: I don`t think it has anything to do with that. I think, you know, there are certain things you can do for your husband and for your wife that you can -- that will turn each other on. And I think people need to not let life get in the way of their relationship. And that the real problem is dealing with their relationship rather than going outside.
BEHAR: Right.
DUPRE: Once they`re thinking about going outside the marriage, they need to sit down and be like, "Ok, something is going on here."
BEHAR: I can understand that. There are special things you do for your man. I only do that on Jewish holidays.
DUPRE: Like what? Like eggs, like an omelet in bed instead of cereal.
BEHAR: Exactly we do it like bacon and eggs every morning. It`s Hanukkah, let`s go for it!
DUPRE: Meat in bed. The bacon`s flying.
BEHAR: You have a new advice column in "The New York Post".
DUPRE: I do, I do.
BEHAR: Ok. It`s very interesting that they hired you to do this. Of course, "The Daily News" is all over it and they think you shouldn`t have it.
DUPRE: Well, it`s "The Daily News". I mean, come on.
BEHAR: Maybe they`re just jealous that they don`t have anybody over there.
DUPRE: "The Post", can I work for both?
BEHAR: Here`s one that you wrote. I just want to read one of them.
"Are there telltale signs a man isn`t happy in his marriage," was the question. I guess you would know, right?
The guy comes to you and he says, oh, did they even talk to you or they just kind of say, let`s just go out.
DUPRE: No, no, you talk. It`s a conversation and it`s a void like it`s -- with an escort we`re filling a void of having a man feel special. And that`s really that`s the issue. And if I can open people`s eyes up to the reality of cheating...
BEHAR: Yes.
DUPRE: It`s like the ugly truth. That women really do like, no, but I have kids and this and that.
BEHAR: I know.
DUPRE: But your relationship, screw the kids, save yourself, save the marriage.
BEHAR: But it`s fascinating that a man who pays for sex actually thinks that he`s special, that the woman thinks that he`s special. Talk about delusion and denial.
DUPRE: It`s the male ego.
BEHAR: Yes the male ego, it`s a very...
DUPRE: Time long male ego.
BEHAR: Is there any hope for men, Ashley?
DUPRE: I don`t know. Maybe.
BEHAR: Any way, I really appreciate you coming on the show.
DUPRE: Thank you so much.
BEHAR: You`re very open minded now...
DUPRE: ... for having me.
BEHAR: ... and talking about your stuff and good luck with your new career.
BEHAR: Thank you, thank you.
BEHAR: Coming up, playboy mogul Hugh Hefner weighs in on Tiger Woods. Of course, who else? We`ll discuss.
(COMMERCIAL BREAK)
BEHAR: You know, there`s more to the news today than Tiger. Seriously, there is. I swear. But we`re just going to start there before we get to other stuff, ok?
Joining me to discuss are Ian Drew, senior editor of "Us Weekly", Michelle Collins, comedian and managing editor of BestEver.TV and Frank Decaro, host of Sirius XM Radio. He`s on the show I think.
FRANK DECARO, HOST, SIRIUS XM RADIO: Yes, yes.
BEHAR: Welcome to the show.
You know, a 48-year-old now allegedly a mistress, has emerged in this whole potpourri of bimbos.
IAN DREW, SENIOR EDITOR, "US WEEKLY": She`s number 14.
BEHAR: Yes and it was a long fling I guess. So what`s going on? Is this like a Freudian need for the mother at this point? I mean, what is this one about now?
DREW: Attention. It`s what they`re all about. I mean, this is...
BEHAR: That she came out, yes.
DREW: Yes.
BEHAR: But if it`s true, I mean, what was he seeking in an older woman?
DREW: Variety.
MICHELLE COLLINS, COMEDIAN: Yes. I think a bigger V, right?
DECARO: Yes.
COLLINS: An older V. What is any man seeking in a Tiger and Cougar, right?
BEHAR: Oh so V for variety, right.
COLLINS: That`s the lady, right.
(CROSSTALK)
DECARO: Don`t you think that -- I mean, it`s great to be the king of golf. But it`s still golf. And I think you`re kind of a big nerd at that point.
BEHAR: It`s a very controlled sport also.
DECARO: Sure.
BEHAR: This is like a burst of energy against the sport in a way, I just thought of that.
DECARO: But I think, he would just want to sleep with everything, you know it`s just seems to me that...
BEHAR: But Jack Nicklaus didn`t want to sleep with everything.
COLLINS: He has been.
DREW: No.
COLLINS: We have not got interviews from the golf balls yet though, you know...
BEHAR: That is true Michelle...
DREW: It`s a very quiet aggression. He had to take out his aggression somewhere, so off the green.
BEHAR: The original lady`s man Hugh Hefner has chimed in on the Tiger story. He said, the other rumor is that one of the rumors is that he`s dead, the other rumor is that no -- that`s true, it`s true. The other rumor is that, is the notion that I somehow approved of his behavior because I said that I was not surprised by it. But I don`t approve of it, I was married for eight years -- oh whoopsie do -- and was faithful to it the entire time.
Well, let`s get an Oscar for him and I certainly had plenty of temptations. I bet you did you dog. But was I happier then? No."
So he wasn`t even -- he was married for eight years, Hugh Hefner and he wasn`t happy because he couldn`t cheat.
COLLINS: Something like that.
COLLINS: Right.
BEHAR: So I mean, is there any hope for these guys?
DECARO: No.
COLLINS: No.
BEHAR: And have we got to the point that we`re listening to this old guy, Hugh Hefner, who has been around the block about a hundred times.
DECARO: He`s the Yoda of sex.
DREW: Yes.
DECARO: So you go to him to find out things. And the -- I totally wasn`t surprised by the thing with Tiger either. Because he`s just -- he`s not the cool guy. He -- didn`t they say they called him Urkel when he was young? Of course he`s going to sleep with everybody, though.
DREW: But all these guys have the look. He looks just like Jon Gosselin. Take a look, compare, there`s a real similarity there.
COLLINS: He`s way more bleaching than Jon Gosselin; I hate to break it to you.
DREW: A little and just a smudge but...
COLLINS: I can stay there a lot. He sounds to me like when I hear him talk, he sounds like when black comedians do impressions of white people. He sounds whiter than white people somehow Tiger has really figured it out.
BEHAR: He`s a kablasian (ph) or something he says he is or something.
COLLINS: Kablasian?
BEHAR: Maybe he is -- why did he get married? Why doesn`t he just go the Derek Jeter, George Clooney route? Everybody loves George Clooney and one of the reasons we love him is because he is honest about his life. He dates girls and that`s the end of it. He`s not getting married he says or having kids.
DREW: Exactly.
DECARO: Those are tremendous -- with George Clooney, though, or Jeter, there`s a tremendous sort of insouciance -- they`re swingery kind of guys.
I don`t think he`s -- I think the only thing he swings is a golf club. I mean, it doesn`t strike me is he`s not the cool guy. So I think that that`s why.
BEHAR: Maybe he got married to get children and have children.
(CROSSTALK)
COLLINS: This is my big thing.
DREW: Oh yes.
BEHAR: Yes.
COLLINS: Like how blinded was she? I think that people don`t never cheat on Swedish women. This is my new theory, that Swedish women are never cheated on, because she couldn`t stand on the sides. You know they are beautiful women.
BEHAR: Well, it`s dark most of the year, that`s why.
DREW: Usually you cheat with a Swedish nanny, not on them. So...
BEHAR: But I mean and now there`s a rumor that they`re going to move to Sweden where all these blondes...
DREW: Yes.
BEHAR: That`s kind of like, you know, that`s really temptation isn`t -- ok, want to change the subject?
COLLINS: Sure.
BEHAR: I hate to do it, but I`m going to.
The Golden Globe nominations came out this morning.
Up for best picture up in the air: "Avatar, "The Hurt Locker" "Inglorious Bastards" and "Precious." And just an FYI later, I`ll be chatting with Mo`nique who is nominated for best supporting actress in "Precious." She`s wonderful in that.
DECARO: I love Mo`nique.
BEHAR: Do you have any predictions?
COLLINS: It`s the year of the big black woman and big black person. I feel like I attend a movie that had a big black person in it. Well, you better get the gowns ready because this is their year.
BEHAR: What are the movies besides "Precious"?
COLLINS: "The Blind Side" with Sandra Bullock. She was nominated for Best Actress. Fabulous movie.
BEHAR: Oh yes.
DREW: "Inglorious Bastards" was full of them.
COLLINS: Well, everywhere.
DREW: Everywhere.
DECARO: I do think they`re going to give it to Mo`nique. I really do, I think...
BEHAR: Mo`Nique should get it, she was fantastic.
DECARO: Yes, she was pretty amazing in that.
DREW: She got so excited she threw a TV today when she heard that. You`ve got to see the movie to know what I`m talking about.
BEHAR: I did see the movie.
DREW: Exactly.
BEHAR: To get deep down into that character I just can`t get over it.
DECARO: Yes.
BEHAR: That she did that, she`s fantastic.
DECARO: And to do the calisthenics in front of the TV. And that`s when the scene where she`s coming through in the aerobics to the tape.
DREW: Yes.
DECARO: That`s when they talk about an actor being brave when you`re wearing (INAUDIBLE) during that.
BEHAR: "Lovely Bones" was snubbed, I saw -- about the girl who dies, gets killed and she`s sort of in heaven somewhere or in a forest or somewhere, I don`t know where the hell she is. But she`s looking down...
COLLINS: It`s splice footage from "What Dreams May Come." They`re like, let`s just make another movie about that.
BEHAR: I must tell you that Stanley Tucci was good in that. He was very good. He plays the murderer. He can play that and then he plays this sort of gay, fun guy in "The Devil Wears Prada." He`s very versatile.
Stay right there. More with my panel when we come back.
(COMMERCIAL BREAK)
BEHAR: Ok, I`m back with my panel.
Rihanna -- she`s a very talented girl -- she gave an emotionally revealing interview to "GQ" for their January issue but I think it will be more notable for the revealing posted photos on gq.com. Do we have pictures? There it is.
Is this a good move for her? They`re going to show pictures while we talk about it. Must see these shots.
DECARO: That`s a lot of nipple photo shop for her; they need a lot of that.
BEHAR: Is this a good move for her to pose practically naked? I mean, very sexual poses.
COLLINS: To me she`s got a beautiful face and I usually think that women who show that much skin are ugly in the face. This has always been my theory because why do you need to show everything. So I`m not sure exactly why she`s exposing so much.
BEHAR: What do you mean because she`s so pretty she doesn`t need to show her body?
COLLINS: She`s so pretty why do we need to see the bottom of her breasts and her V. You know what I`m saying? I don`t get it.
DREW: she`s been going this way. She`s trying to go edgier and edgier and edgier. Soon it`s going to be all off. That`s her whole thing now, like her little rebellion act after everything.
BEHAR: You think so? What do you think Frank?
DECARO: I think she`s gone from someone who her boyfriend hit to someone her mother is going to hit when you see those photos. I mean, she`s naked and the shorts are not much better. The shorts are a band aid with a pocket. And they`re really little. But I think -- I mean, it`s provocative and it`s out there. It`s not like you haven`t naked people on the cover of GQ before but it`s still...
BEHAR: But she says, she goes -- she said in the interview, I don`t want to be defined by that night, meaning the night that Chris Brown hit her. So she wants to be defined by these pictures?
DREW: That`s exactly what she`s doing. She`s trying to take -- even on the album on the back cover, her butt is all exposed.
(CROSSTALK)
DREW: Let`s face it, she`s compensating for the fact that the album not so well received. It debuted at number 4, it`s not that good, some of the reviews are very mixed. So it`s like, you know, you kind of have to pull it all out.
BEHAR: While Rihanna moves on, Chris Brown can`t seem to do anything right. I mentioned yesterday his latest Twitter posting and seeing his album wasn`t in stock at Wal-Mart. I`ll read it again because it`s poetry in motion.
"What the F do I gotta do? WTF. Yes. I said it and I`m not retracting S. I`m not biting my tongue about S else. The industry can kiss my A."
DECARO: A regular Maya Angelou.
BEHAR: Maya Angelou, eat your heart out.
DECARO: Now you know where those lyrics come from.
BEHAR: It`s like Noel Coward -- I don`t know.
(CROSSTALK)
BEHAR: Now, yesterday, Brown deleted his Twitter account. Will the world survive? I don`t know if I can take it. I mean -- have you been following it?
DECARO: Did he delete it or did somebody thing, "You know, you`ve had enough I`m taking that away from you." Because that`s what I worry that someone would.
DREW: He`s been beating himself up over this. Trust me.
BEHAR: Whose career is in more trouble, his or Tiger`s? At this point -- that`s a heavy question.
COLLINS: I think his. Because his is so much more tied in to his personality and his music is one and the same. Tiger can still go on the course and play it separate from the women he...
BEHAR: Do you think so? Tiger didn`t hit anybody. The women don`t - - they`re mad at him for cheating on his wife, but hitting a woman is a whole other ball game I think.
DECARO: And Chris Brown is not to R&B what Tiger Woods is to golf. It`s not like you`re -- he`s not the greatest ever. And I think that that - hopefully Tiger has room for a comeback.
COLLINS: Tiger doesn`t have a foot locker, by the way, to see if they have his fingerless gloves and stock either. You don`t see them hanging around.
BEHAR: Thank you, everybody. Thanks for doing this.
Up next, actress Mo`nique on her first Golden Globe nomination. Stay there.
(COMMERCIAL BREAK)
BEHAR: As Tiger`s list of mistresses grows, so does his list of dropped sponsors. Gatorade bailed on his drink. Gillette limited his role. Accenture dropped him completely. And now Tag Heuer is reassessing their relationship with Tiger. Joining me to discuss this is Donny Deutsch, Chairman Of Deutsche Incorporated. Thank you so much for coming on the show.
DONNY DEUTSCH, CHAIRMAN OF DEUTSCHE INCORPORATED: My pleasure is glad to be here. I`m a huge fan of yours in every way shape and form.
BEHAR: Thank you and you thought -- I mean, I hate to have a mutual society here, you know, but you look great.
DEUTSCH: I know. I was a little embarrassed when you asked me to take my shirt off before the show, but I`m going to keep it on.
BEHAR: Take it on at the end of the segment, would you, so my fans out there, for your fans.
DEUTSCH: For the ladies out there.
BEHAR: Yes, now you`re the media person. You know everything.
DEUTSCH: Yes.
BEHAR: You do.
DEUTSCH: Media guru.
BEHAR: So, is it time for Tiger to panic yet in terms of endorsements?
DEUTSCH: No, no. You can`t just say one word, endorsements. There`s a huge difference between Accenture, which is a financial services company, which kind of -- they had to bail, versus Nike, which basically he is their billion-dollar golf business.
BEHAR: He is Nike.
DEUTSCH: He is Nike golf and Nike is young men and no guy is going to stop buying Tiger golf wear because of this. It`s just - reality. Also electronic arts, video games, you know, they`re not going anywhere, its young men. So the more conservative and the broader the base the advertiser, the more sensitivity they have.
BEHAR: I see. But does Tiger even care? I mean he`s worth a billion dollars. What do I care -- do you care? Does anyone care?
DEUTSCH: You know look, I`m not inside his head -- of course he cares. First of all these are big dollars. You know, how much money you have, I mean Accenture is $15 million a year. And I think he cares going forward. He doesn`t want this to be the end of his endorsement career and it`s not. You know, as long as he does certain things right.
BEHAR: Right.
DEUTSCH: At some point he`s got to come forward --
BEHAR: Yes, like how -- what should he do?
DEUTSCH: people need to see the pain. I mean, he`s taken the first right steps.
BEHAR: They want to see the pain? They want the Oprah moments.
DEUTSCH: They want to -- they want the suffering. He doesn`t have to do it. As you said he`s worth a billion dollars, he can go screw you, I`m not doing it.
BEHAR: Yes.
DEUTSCH: If he wants to move forward and get past this, he`s got to come out and say - I deserve everything that`s happening. I`ve ruined my family life. I`m going to do whatever it takes to put it back together. And then let`s fast forward, imagine a year from now, where you know he`s on the golf course, his first tournament back, which would be the highest rated tournament ever. You watch golf, no, but you probably be watching that.
BEHAR: I - I - its (UNINTELLIGIBLE) you know.
DEUTSCH: But for that it`s a different thing. And let`s say he wins and then if his wife is in the gallery on the side, and there`s a tea for the room -- it will be bigger than ever. So the story is still yet to be written. Will he lose or has he lost some endorsements, yes. Can he come back and be as big as ever? Yes.
BEHAR: Yes, since I have you here and you`re a macho guy -- I`m just curious.
DEUTSCH: Here it comes. Here it comes. Yes, ok.
BEHAR: I`m trying to ask -
DEUTSCH: I was nowhere near any of those indiscretions. You ask all those women were right out of -- you couldn`t cast them.
BEHAR: I know, I know are they your type by the way? Is any one of them your type?
DEUTSCH: You`re my type.
BEHAR: I`m your type -- come on, tell the truth.
DEUTSCH: You are my type.
BEHAR: Are they -- Post menopausal brunettes, redheads? Constant colors don`t match.
DEUTSCH: No, just very - you know, beautiful women who know who they are. I will take any show to the gutter, just put me here and it`ll find its way down.
BEHAR: But here`s my question because you`re a guy and I asked this of other guys.
DEUTSCH: Yes of course.
BEHAR: And now I want your opinion. What is he supposed to do for sex now, this guy? You know what I mean?
DEUTSCH: Maybe his wife?
BEHAR: He may not want to do it with him anymore.
DEUTSCH: The answer is this; I`m not a psychologist,
BEHAR: Yes.
DEUTSCH: But this is not a habit that`s going to be easy to break. One might say, and obviously you don`t want to see any family fall apart. For his endorsements and for his wife, if his wife leaves him, it might be the best thing, because then he got his. Tiger got his, lost his family. And then he can be Derek Jeter. Derek Jeter sleeps with every women, nobody cares.
BEHAR: The girls he sleeps with care.
DEUTSCH: He is a single guy -
BEHAR: The girls he sleeps with care.
DEUTSCH: Ok, but what I`m saying is his life may be easier. Now clearly I don`t think he wants to lose his family. I`m not inside his head, but you know, that`s for him to figure out. But --
BEHAR: Many people get divorced, they don`t lose the whole family, they lose the wife and husband.
DEUTSCH: Well I mean you lose the wife - you`d obviously have to lose his children. But -
BEHAR: But if she takes the kids to Sweden, he may lose his kids too.
DEUTSCH: Well something tells me that probably she -- I don`t know that he will allow that. I`m not a lawyer but I would believe and agree --
BEHAR: Allow? Custody, baby.
DEUTSCH: Well custody but you can`t take the kids out of the country. I don`t know if that will happen, we`ll see. But you know, I thought the question you were going to ask me, which I was on actually giving expert male advice on the today show -
BEHAR: Yes.
DEUTSCH: Why do men like to - why does he cheat? He`s got a beautiful wife.
BEHAR: Ok, answer the question.
DEUTSCH: I don`t know.
BEHAR: I though you know the answer.
DEUTSCH: Because he can.
BEHAR: Because he can.
(LAUGHTER)
BEHAR: Oh I heard a laugh -
DEUTSCH: No, no, no - and she should - you know why men cheat?
BEHAR: Why.
DEUTSCH: Very often to stay in a marriage. Seriously.
BEHAR: Oh this is an interesting spin.
DEUTSCH: Every guy - now this is a -
(CROSSTALK)
BEHAR: The Donny Deutsche spin is coming.
DEUTSCH: I`m not saying its right, listen to me, every guy is out there, - and they`re all running. What are you talking about Donny?
BEHAR: Yes.
DEUTSCH: Here`s why, it`s very simple.
BEHAR: Yes.
DEUTSCH: You love your life, you love your family. Whatever happens in the marriage, maybe some of the passion is gone, whatever. And you say to yourself, the rationalization, you know. Instead of blowing up my family, I don`t want to hurt my family. The way I`m going to do it is on the side, quietly. I`m not saying its right. That`s why a lot of men cheat. Don`t shoot the messenger.
BEHAR: I`m not going to shoot the messenger. Apparently you know what you`re talking about.
DEUTSCH: No, I don`t.
BEHAR: But what I was going to say is -
DEUTSCH: What, what?
BEHAR: The passion runs out of the marriage, we all know that.
DEUTSCH: Eventually.
BEHAR: Eventually it peters out so to speak. But the woman could also take that option. And then --
DEUTSCH: By the way, by the way, they do.
BEHAR: And then the men get so crazy - if they find out.
DEUTSCH: By the way they do statistics. No, but first of all, women cheat as much as men do. That`s the fact.
BEHAR: I can`t believe that`s exactly the same.
DEUTSCH: Statistics show that. Statistically I think it`s 50 percent versus 38 percent. But trust me; it`s not just men, its women. It`s not right but it`s very prevalent. That`s the other reason I think he`ll be able to withstand his endorsement. What he did is not right. But our President of the United States did it and it`s a sin that is very prevalent in this country. So it`s different from breaking the law or something or - -
BEHAR: But Clinton only had two or three. This guy is up to 14 to 15 -
DEUTSCH: We don`t know. How do we know?
BEHAR: Oh they would have come out. These women love to talk. Thank you for your insights, Donny.
DEUTSCH: You know what, this was so special.
BEHAR: You want to take your shirt off now? Go ahead, take it off, I dare you. I dare you. Do it.
DEUTSCH: Double dare me.
BEHAR: Do it, does it, does it, does it.
DEUTSCH: No - you take your shirt off- no, you know what, and sometimes you just have to leave a little something for the imagination. All right?
BEHAR: All right. I`m going to dream about you tonight.
DEUTSCH: I too, baby.
BEHAR: Thank you Donny.
DEUTSCH: Is she like this with all her guests? So I`m not special, I`m just another --
BEHAR: No, you are. You`re very special to me. And now to a different kind of wakeup call, the type that starts with hi, you`re nominated for a Golden Globe. That`s how my next guest started her morning. She`s a comedian, a talk show host, and now a Golden Globe nominee for her outstanding dramatic performance in the film "Precious."
(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)
UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: And I don`t want you to sit there and judge me.
UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: You shut up and let him abuse your daughter.
UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: I did not want him to abuse my daughter. I did not want him to hurt her.
UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: But you allowed him to hurt her.
UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: I did not want him to do nothing to her. So those things that she told you I did to her, who - who else was going to love me?
(END VIDEO CLIP)
BEHAR: Congratulations on your Golden Globe nomination earlier today for best supporting actress.
MO`NIQUE: Thank you baby.
BEHAR: How do you feel?
MO`NIQUE: Absolutely wonderful.
BEHAR: I mean, I cannot tell you how I was taken by your performance, Mo`Nique. It was so stirring and so deep and so interesting, the way you found things in the character for yourself. And she`s not likable character.
MO`NIQUE: Not at all.
BEHAR: She`s a monster. And, I mean, you just went down deep, girl. Where did you go?
MO`NIQUE: Well, you know, once I read the book, when you read that story, that character is very real. And I know Mary Jones. I know that monster. So when Mr. Daniel said action, I was very familiar with that character. And that character for me in my life was my oldest brother, Jerald. So when he would say action, I knew who she was.
BEHAR: I see. So - so it was, but you throw the baby on the floor in one scene. I mean that`s one most upsetting scene. And you had to live with that character for a while too. That must have been rough on you, every day.
MO`NIQUE: Well, you know, the beauty of it though is, Joy, I remember when I got the script and my husband and I read it and he said to me, momma, leave it on the floor. Whenever he says cut, leave it right there and don`t take it with you. And that`s really what we did. When Lee Danes would say cut, we would leave those characters right there on that floor.
BEHAR: So right to Kraft services.
MO`NIQUE: Right to Kraft services, baby. Yes!
BEHAR: And the worst thing I heard is you were not allowed to wear any makeup in this part. That`s a burn.
MO`NIQUE: Joy, I got to tell you, when I`m not in front of a camera, I`m so not a makeup girl. I don`t look like Mary Jones. But I`m so not a makeup girl.
BEHAR: And you know you`re known for your comedy and films like "Phat Girls." and "Soul Plane." Basically Mo`Nique a comedian. This is quite a rare; it`s like Meryl Streep in reverse. She does drama and comedy and everybody is shocked and surprised. You did the opposite.
MO`NIQUE: Well you know, I think the word is we`re entertainers and everything comes under that. I was really appreciative when Lee Daniels didn`t put me into that box. He said I know you can make people laugh. But I believe you can bring these characters to life. And I was in a movie "Shadow Boxer" and in the movie "Precious." And he said, you know, I believe you can bring something to these characters. So I was so appreciative that he didn`t do the norm and say oh, no, she`s just a comedienne.
BEHAR: You know one African-American critic dubbed the film a Klansman`s Fantasy. What do you make of that?
MO`NIQUE: A what?
BEHAR: In other words, the Ku Klux Klan would like this film because some people -- I guess in the black community are feeling as though it`s -- it doesn`t make the black community look good.
MO`NIQUE: Well here`s the thing, those characters just happen to be black. And, I always say the audience is very intelligent. They know this is not just a black movie This happens all over the world. Every race, every gender. If you can think of it, it happens everywhere. We just happen to be the characters telling the story and we`re black people. Does it happen in black America? Yes, it does, Joy. Does it happen in white America? Yes, it does. Does it happen in Asia? Yes, it does. Does it happen -- it happens all over the world. So what I would say to people is oh, it makes black people look this way or that way, it tells the truth. Are all people in that position?
BEHAR: Right.
MO`NIQUE: Of course not. Are all white people in that position? Of course not. We as human beings need to see the message of the movie and not get caught up in it. Oh got it depicted these two black women this way.
BEHAR: Right.
MO`NIQUE: It depicted a very true story.
BEHAR: Unfortunately, you`re right; it`s a cross cultural horror.
MO`NIQUE: Yes.
BEHAR: Don`t go away. We`ll be back with more from Mo`Nique.
(COMMERCIAL BREAK)
(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)
UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: Now there was a time Precious had everything, and I even told her that. And me and Carl, we love precious. But you need to know that. We love Precious.
(END VIDEO CLIP)
BEHAR: I`m back this morning with the woman who just this morning garnered a Golden Globe nomination for her stunning performance in "Precious," Mo`Nique. So you know you alluded to your brother in the last segment. I was wondering if you would elaborate on that. I understand you were sexually molested by your brother when you were 7 years old, is that right?
MO`NIQUE: Yes.
BEHAR: So you used him as the character that you were playing?
MO`NIQUE: Yes. You know, Mary Jones and Precious, we know those people. And often times with this film I think that the impact was so hard because when you watch that film, you may have been Mary Jones watching.
BEHAR: Yes.
MO`NIQUE: And I really believe that if you are Mary Jones watching, it changes your life because sometimes you don`t know what you`re doing until you see it.
BEHAR: Yes. And since you experienced something similar to the victim in the film, I guess you used your family background. How old was your brother when he molested you?
MO`NIQUE: If I`m 42, I think Jerald may have been 14, 15.
BEHAR: And you were 7. So he was much older than you?
MO`NIQUE: Uh-huh.
BEHAR: And did you confront him at the time?
MO`NIQUE: Well, when you`re a child, you don`t know how to confront. But when you become an adult, and there were times I did confront it. I`m angry, I`m mad, I`m hurt, I`m crying. But doing this movie, Joy, and I have not spoken to my brother in years, but doing this movie made me say, you know what? I forgive. I forgive. And I wish that he would get some help and help that - that he needs so nobody else will go through it.
So in doing this movie and understanding Mary Jones and in the end, I got a call from Mr. Daniels when we shot that scene. And I never went to see the Daily. So he called me like a week later and he said I can`t believe you made people hate you and love you. Because Mary Jones is a human being who is mentally ill. It`s easy for us to call her a monster and throw her away, because that`s what this society unfortunately does. We don`t address it and deal with it. But understanding Mary Jones in her sickness really made me understand my brother and his sickness.
So when you understand it, you wish no ill, you just wish that they get the help so no one else will suffer at the hands of that illness.
BEHAR: Right. That`s a very good way to do it. She is mentally ill. Unfortunately the child is trapped in a family with a mentally ill mother
MO`NIQUE: Yes.
BEHAR: And a mentally ill father in this movie.
MO`NIQUE: Yes.
BEHAR: And it`s so sad to see that she has nowhere to go. And I would assume you as a child you must have felt that way too with your brother.
MO`NIQUE: Well you know the difference was I had both parents and I had the family. But understand when you go through that as a child, you don`t know which way to turn. You really don`t know what to do.
BEHAR: Did your parents try to protect you from him? Did anybody intercede on your behalf?
MO`NIQUE: I didn`t tell my parents, Joy, until I was 15 years old.
BEHAR: Oh.
MO`NIQUE: I didn`t even tell them.
BEHAR: Did he threaten you if you were to tell? That`s what happens sometimes.
MO`NIQUE: Yes, I think that it goes with it. It goes with it. And let me also say this, because in doing this movie, it`s made me open up to a lot of things. Not all molesters are bad people. We want to make them these monsters.
BEHAR: They`re also sick.
MO`NIQUE: It`s a sickness. It`s a sickness. And if we address it as a sickness and try to get help, we -- so many of us wouldn`t have a story to tell, because so many of us have a story to tell in reference to molestation.
BEHAR: So many. And I was reading that you`re in therapy or you were in psychotherapy. Is that a fact?
MO`NIQUE: Yes.
BEHAR: So you have tried to exorcise the demons from your childhood through psycho therapy. Has it helped you a lot?
MO`NIQUE: You know I won`t call them demons. When I went to therapy, therapy was extremely enlightening for me. Because it allowed me to get some things off of me that I don`t know if I would have ever said that. Because often times when you talk to people you know, they`ll judge it and have their opinions. But when you go to therapy, it`s just wide open. They`re not judging it, they don`t have an opinion, they just want you to get well because they really don`t know you.
So I suggest to all of my sisters and brothers watching, if you got something on you and can`t live it off, to live a productive life, and not be the victim but celebrate the victory, go get you some help, baby. It works.
BEHAR: The talking cure. It`s very, very effective. I`ve been through it myself. It`s a very effective form of getting your life together and moving forward and not carrying stuff with you.
MO`NIQUE: It really is. It really is. I know Lynn Whitfield says something that was really incredible. She said often times we as women, we worry about what`s on our head but not what`s inside of our head.
BEHAR: Yes. I also admire the fact that you are very confident about the way that you look and you don`t judge yourself negatively when you put on weight. I`ve notice that you`ve lost some weight. Has that changed your attitude about weight in any way?
MO`NIQUE: Has it changed my attitude about weight?
BEHAR: Yes because I mean, you were the Fat and Fabulous thing that you were doing. And now you are a litter thinner. So now you`re sort of slim and superb.
MO`NIQUE: Oh well thank you so much Joy.
BEHAR: I mean -
MO`NIQUE: But I`m still 220 pounds, so --
BEHAR: You`re a light weight, you`re silk.
MO`NIQUE: So when it says has it changed my mind about weight? Well, the moment you know better, you have to do better.
BEHAR: Yes.
MO`NIQUE: And I was at one time 262 pounds at 38, 39 years old. So when you start doing the math, if I gained ten pounds over ten years, well, now I`m at 270.
BEHAR: Yes, not good.
MO`NIQUE: So if it keeps going up. And because we have these babies, David, and Jonathan and Michael, they`re 6 and 4 years old. We want to be around. I want to be around to Whelan`s children. He`s 19 years old. So you have the make the decision that is best for you.
BEHAR: Uh - huh. I want to talk about, a little bit about your marriage when we come back.
MO`NIQUE: Let`s talk about
BEHAR: Hang in there girl -- we`ll be back with Mo`Nique after this short break.
(COMMERCIAL BREAK)
(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)
UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: Okay. Are you ready to make some noise, baby! Hooorah.
(END VIDEO CLIP)
BEHAR: I`m back with Golden Globe nominee, Mo`Nique. I think the Oscar might be on its way next.
MO`NIQUE: You think so, Joy?
BEHAR: Well, yes, you are going to get a nomination, I think. Absolutely.
MO`NIQUE: Ok, from your mouth to god`s ears.
BEHAR: Yes, a lot of people from the film should get nominated. And you definitely should win. The girl who plays Gabon - Sid - gabby.
MO`NIQUE: Her name is Gabby Sidibe.
BEHAR: Yes, she was brilliant also.
MO`NIQUE: Joy when I tell you, she was absolutely amazing.
BEHAR: Yes.
MO`NIQUE: Jaw dropping. What that young lady pulled off has never been done before.
BEHAR: And then Mariah Carey without makeup, I love it.
MO`NIQUE: Oh, Mariah, everybody -- Mariah was brilliant. Paula Pat, Many Cravisher, Mary Sheperd, each one teach one young ladies. Everybody was just amazing.
BEHAR: I`ve got to give a little shout out to my friend Mary Shepherd. She was in the movie too.
MO`NIQUE: Corn row.
BEHAR: Just briefly, I`ve got some Twitters. You know, people tweet questions to me for you.
MO`NIQUE: Uh-huh.
BEHAR: Mo`s been outspoken, they call you mo. Mo`s been outspoken about an open marriage. Can it work for everyone? Tell me about that.
MO`NIQUE: Can it work for everyone, you know, I don`t know. I don`t know - and it depends on the two individuals to what makes it work for them.
BEHAR: What does it mean to have an open marriage to you?
MO`NIQUE: To be extremely, brutally, 100 percent honest. I refuse -- and this is my third marriage, Joy, who happens to be my best friend since we were 14 years old. So there are no secrets. There is nothing that I can say to Sidney that I`m going to be judged or looked at or I can`t believe you said that. There`s nothing he can say to me. There is not one wildest dreams, my wildest fantasies that I cannot share with my very best friend who happens to be my husband.
BEHAR: Well it sounds as though you`ve come to the conclusion - not the conclusion but you`ve come to a place where you know what it`s about. It`s about friendship and communication.
MO`NIQUE: That is it, baby.
BEHAR: That`s it.
MO`NIQUE: That is it. It`s about friendship and communication. And the one thing Sid and I have on our side is over 25 years of friendship. Before we even became husband and wife.
BEHAR: Do you have any advice for Tiger Woods, while I have you here?
MO`NIQUE: Tiger Woods, baby, I wish you and your wife the best. And the advice that I will have for the people, is mind your damn business. And let that man and woman work out their situation.
BEHAR: Uh-huh. All right well we wouldn`t have talked shows if we minded our business.
MO`NIQUE: Joy, mind your business.
BEHAR: If I minded my business, I`d never have a job. Well I have to say again, congratulations to you on a job well done. A beautiful job really. I`m so happy for you. I hope you win the Oscar, too.
MO`NIQUE: Thank you.
BEHAR: I know you`re going to get a Golden Globe. You`ve got to get it.
MO`NIQUE: Thank you baby, I appreciate that.
BEHAR: All right, now you take care of yourself.
MO`NIQUE: Ok momma, god blesses you.
BEHAR: Ok, thank you for joining me tonight. Good night, everybody.
END
