Return to Transcripts main page
Joy Behar Page
Charlie Sheen Charged with Second-Degree Assault; Year of the Tiger; Interview With Dr. Mehmet Oz
Aired January 04, 2010 - 21:00 ET
THIS IS A RUSH TRANSCRIPT. THIS COPY MAY NOT BE IN ITS FINAL FORM AND MAY BE UPDATED.
JOY BEHAR, HOST: Tonight on THE JOY BEHAR SHOW. On "Two and a Half Men, Charlie Sheen plays a sleazy amoral louse; was it type casting or just coincidence? We`ll discuss.
Then the host of the "Dr. Oz Show" Dr. Mehmet Oz drops by to make a house call.
Plus, the New Year has begun and it appears Tiger`s wife has made a resolution, to take half of his money.
All this and more, tonight.
Happy New Year everybody. I hope you all had a good holiday.
I spent a fabulous ski weekend with Mahmoud Ahmadinejad. FYI, not only can he slalom, he can dance, he can sing, he told stories about subjugating women and torturing gays. What can I say, the man was delicious.
Ok. Enough about me. Let`s jump right in.
Charlie Sheen has been charged with second-degree assault, menacing and criminal mischief yet his wife, Brooke Mueller now says she`s standing by her man.
Joining me to discuss are Victor Rivers, an advocate to end domestic violence and domestic abuse survivor; Lloyd Grove, editor at large for the dailybeast.com; and Robi Ludwig, psychotherapist extraordinaire. Welcome.
Lloyd, what happened on Christmas morning in the Sheen house?
LLOYD GROVE, EDITOR AT LARGE, DAILYBEAST.COM: Well, they had a terrible argument that started at about 3:00 in the morning and went until 8:00 when she called the police. And apparently it was over some jealousy thing.
BEHAR: What kind of jealousy thing? Do you know more?
GROVE: He was singing a song that he had written for a daughter, not his child with Brooke and she got jealous apparently. That`s what he told the cops afterwards.
It escalated to the point where he, according to her, had her down on the bed, his hand on her throat and a knife to her throat and threatened to have her whacked if she followed through on her threat to leave him with their two young babies.
BEHAR: So, allegedly, she got jealous because he has a song about a kid he had with another woman?
GROVE: Correct.
BEHAR: There must have been some drinking involved here.
GROVE: That`s the allegation. In his statement to the cops, Charlie Sheen said that she had been abusing alcohol.
BEHAR: Yes. So, she abuses alcohol, then he abuses her? Is that how that works?
GROVE: Apparently, yes.
BEHAR: Yes. But Sheen has a very long history of domestic abuse. I mean, in 1990, he allegedly shot his girlfriend, Kelly Preston.
GROVE: Right.
BEHAR: ... in the arm, who now married to John Travolta. And in 1996 allegedly threw girlfriend Brittany Ashland onto the marble floor and was charged with domestic abuse.
GROVE: Correct.
BEHAR: You know, why was she with this guy? Robi you tell me. I mean here you have situation where she knows his history. Why would she go with him?
ROBI LUDWIG, PSYCHOTHERAPIST: Well, there are a lot of women that feel that they will be different. And these guys who can be abusive are very charming sometimes at the beginning.
BEHAR: Yes.
LUDWIG: Because everybody is very hopeful at the beginning of a relationship. So, they can idealize a woman and then once the woman falls off the pedestal they become enraged with them and then can direct a lot of their violence towards the woman.
BEHAR: Right. Really?
LUDWIG: Yes.
BEHAR: Sheen`s wife, Mueller -- her name is Muller -- her attorney, his quote was about that incident. He said oh, one bad night. That was an odd way for her attorney to respond. What do you make of that?
GROVE: Her attorney is a guy named Yale Galanter, who we all know represented O.J. in the declining years. There`s no accounting for that. Obviously it wasn`t one bad night.
BEHAR: But why would he be her lawyer, why not his in that case? If you`re making the analogy to O.J.?
GROVE: Well, I don`t -- I think that`s right. But I guess she just got him first.
BEHAR: I see.
Well, let`s listen to his wife`s terrifying 911 call. This is bad.
(BEGIN AUDIO CLIP)
911 OPERATOR: Tell me exactly what happened.
BROOKE MUELLER, CHARLIE SHEEN`S WIFE: My husband had me -- with a knife. And I`m scared for my life, and he threatened me.
911 OPERATOR: Ok. Are you guys separated right now?
MUELLER: Yes, right now. We have people that are separating us, but I thought I was going to die for one hour.
911 OPERATOR: Ok. What`s your name?
MUELLER: Brooke.
911 OPERATOR: What`s your husband`s name?
MUELLER: It`s Charlie Sheen.
(END AUDIO CLIP)
BEHAR: You know, that`s a very terrified woman, is it not?
LUDWIG: Yes.
BEHAR: Victor, let me bring you into the conversation. Do you believe some good can come out of this to educate other people or not?
VICTOR RIVERS, ADVOCATE TO END DOMESTIC VIOLENCE: Yes, I do. I mean, I think that us discussing it is very important, because domestic violence many times is referred to as a private family matter or it`s someone else`s business or it doesn`t happen in my household.
The reality is that for every celebrity domestic violence case we have, there`s roughly around 61,000 cases every day and about 21,000 people call hotlines nationally. So, this is giving us an opportunity to have some dialogue on this issue.
And I think that, yes, if I was to speak to Charlie I would say, one, you`re responsible for your behavior. And, two, you should get help. I only wish my father had.
BEHAR: Yes. Victor`s family is -- tell us your history briefly, Victor, so everybody knows where you`re at.
RIVERS: Ok. Well, I grew up in a home where domestic violence took place on a level of torture. Not only with my mother and my other siblings; as a child I was beaten, tied up, locked in closets, hammered, burned. And my mother was absolutely terrified of my father.
There were no shelters or hotlines that we have today, which is the good news. And he threatened to kill her or her children if she left him.
So that`s why many women actually stay. They say why don`t you just leave? 75 percent of women are in grave danger of being killed by their abuser after they`ve left their relationship.
BEHAR: Nowadays it seems like it`s a little bit easier to leave. There are places to go, shelters, et cetera.
LUDWIG: It is but that is when the woman is at most risk. Really the man who is married to a woman that he is abusing, he really is very dependent on her, which is an odd way to think of that kind of relationship and they can`t tolerate being alone.
BEHAR: I know.
LUDWIG: So, it`s this paradoxical situation we have. Certainly knowledge about domestic violence has reduced the amount of murders that have gone on.
BEHAR: Right.
LUDWIG: Yes.
GROVE: And certainly the fact that Charlie Sheen is a huge, highly paid television star is factoring into this as well, because he`s probably getting some easier treatment.
BEHAR: Because he`s famous.
GROVE: Because he`s famous, and because he`s rich and they can hire the best legal counsel.
LUDWIG: And the way he presents himself too. There`s a lot of Hollywood glamour. We want to believe in our perceptions if something looks good and is charming.
BEHAR: Well that may be true for the first time, but this is the third time.
LUDWIG: Yes. Right.
GROVE: We all have very short memories.
BEHAR: I guess so, but I`m here to remind them.
LUDWIG: Also when a wife forgives -- a wife is really a character reference for her husband. It just makes the whole situation that much more confusing for some people.
BEHAR: It sounds like it`s almost a very hopeless situation for some women the way Victor describes it, the way you describe it now, saying that even if you can go to a shelter, you still in danger that he will come and get you. It`s like that movie with Julia Roberts "Sleeping with the Enemy".
LUDWIG: It needs to be done in a certain kind of way. You don`t want to say I`m leaving you because -- and I`m going to get an order of protection. That`s when women are in danger. But what can be said is...
BEHAR: Really?
LUDWIG: Yes. Because the person who is a control freak says you`re not going to tell me what to do. I would rather have you dead than you leave me.
BEHAR: So, what should she do?
LUDWIG: If you say something like I want to protect both of us by living in two separate situations, because when we are together, it`s just volatile.
BEHAR: Yes, but Robi, if he can`t tolerate being in the house by himself he`s not going to allow that either.
LUDWIG: It depends how it`s said. It`s not healthy for us to be together right now. Let`s both get treatment. Then it is less -- it produces less violence.
BEHAR: Yes. Victor, what do you think about all that?
RIVERS: Well, I --
BEHAR: Go ahead.
RIVERS: My feeling is that -- this is wonderful that we`re sitting here talking, that you have a man -- two men on this panel, is the fact that there`s a new solution to the old problem and that solution is men. We need more men to stand up shoulder to shoulder and say that this behavior is unacceptable because you see most men are good men but we stand by silently when we know that our uncles, our team mates, our co-workers are committing this acts of violence in this respect.
I mean Charlie has a family full of men. Where are they? Where are these...
BEHAR: You know that`s an interesting point. His father, Martin Sheen is like the most peaceful kind of guy and yet this guy is in the family.
GROVE: He`s a vegan.
BEHAR: He`s a vegan. Well, vegans could hill. I think Hitler was a vegan. I don`t know about that.
I don`t think those things go together. But I mean what should Martin do? Maybe -- has he been in this situation at all?
GROVE: Well, violence is a learned behavior. You know, people aren`t born bad. The fact is that this behavior is usually learned in homes and in relationships. I don`t know about Charlie`s situation.
I know that`s very common. Our jails are full of men who started out as victims or witnesses of family violence.
(CROSSTALK)
BEHAR: It is a syndrome.
GROVE: Absolutely.
BEHAR: And a very bad and very dangerous syndrome. Thanks everybody for joining me in this conversation.
When we come back -- oh, yes, there`s more Tiger Woods, believe it or not. It doesn`t go away.
(COMMERCIAL BREAK)
BEHAR: It may be a New Year but thank goodness you can count on a few old standbys like the ever entertaining Tiger Woods` scandal.
Yesterday on Fox News, Brit Hume has an interesting proposal for Tiger.
(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)
BRIT HUME, FOX NEWS COMMENTATOR: The extent in which he can recover it seems to me depends on his faith. He is said to be a Buddhist, I don`t think that faith offers the kind of forgiveness and redemption that is offered by the Christian faith.
So my message to Tiger would be, Tiger, turn your faith, turn to the Christian faith and you can make a total recovery and be a great example to the world.
(END VIDEO CLIP)
BEHAR: Joining me to talk about him and a few other happenings in the news are actor and comedian Fred Willard and radio talk show host the fabulous Stephanie Miller.
So, what is wrong with being a Buddhist, do you think? According to Brit Hume, he should become a Christian because this forgiveness -- I went to confession as a child. Did you?
STEPHANIE MILLER, HOST, "THE STEPHANIE MILLER SHOW": I don`t think...
FRED WILLARD, ACTOR/COMEDIAN: No, I did not, because I did not go in our church we didn`t have confession.
BEHAR: Oh, you`re not a Catholic?
WILLARD: No.
BEHAR: Yes. You should have been a Catholic. Then you can just like wash all your sins away.
WILLARD: That would be the ideal, wouldn`t it? Yes.
BEHAR: Yes, yes.
WILLARD: I -- what was the question?
BEHAR: The question is what...
WILLARD: Because I came here as quickly as I heard about this whole topic. I said Tiger Woods has done something wrong?
BEHAR: I know. It`s shocking, isn`t it? It`s shocking.
WILLARD: And my first reaction -- men have a different reaction to this than women. The first time you heard about this you say, hey, Tiger. Good for Tiger. That`s pretty good.
But then it got worst...
BEHAR: Really?
WILLARD: Yes. But then it got worse. See, you`re disapproving already.
BEHAR: No, no, I`m just wondering.
WILLARD: But a billionaire with these pretty girls. But then it`s gotten kind of weird. But my take on it is if you can do something as well as he does -- and I`m talking about golf...
BEHAR: Yes. Let`s get that clear. Yes.
WILLARD: There`s going to be...
BEHAR: Yes.
WILLARD: ... there`s going to be -- be a demand for him.
Now, as for the religion, I don`t know. Whatever religion -- I don`t think people are that interested in the affair that he gets forgiveness or something. If they want to pay to see -- him play golf and he can make sponsors money, eventually, I don`t know how long he`ll come back and be on top if he wants to be and he plays it right.
BEHAR: I see.
WILLARD: That`s my take.
MILLER: I can confirm his guy thing. Because my guy friend I say why is this beautiful wife -- for the same reason a dog licks himself, because he can.
BEHAR: Yes, exactly, yes.
MILLER: But yes, the religious angle, many of the women he was with he apparently made very religious, if you know what I`m saying.
BEHAR: You mean they were all yelling "Oh, God".
MILLER: Yes, it was you never miss an orgasm joke, my friend.
BEHAR: No, I never.
MILLER: Yes, I -- I don`t understand. I don`t know Buddhism that well either, Joy. But as I understand that most religious prohibit the banging of cocktail waitresses when you`re married to someone else. I think that`s pretty much inherent.
BEHAR: I know, now let me tell you this.
Elin, the wife, reportedly wants $300 million; this is what we heard today from Tiger. That would -- they`re married five years. He`s worth about $600 million, I think.
WILLARD: Is that all? I really thought he would have...
BEHAR: Yes, well, after taxes.
WILLARD: After the taxes.
BEHAR: But they`re married five years. That would be $16 million a year. We broke this down. $164,000 per day or $6,849 per hour of marriage; doesn`t include dental.
Now, is that fair, that she should get half of the money just because he cheated on her? He didn`t kill anybody. He didn`t hit her like Charlie Sheen allegedly did. We were discussing that earlier in the show.
WILLARD: Yes. And I heard that today she was kind of almost bragging about it. It almost felt like she`s -- this is kind of a good thing. If they throw you lemons, make lemonade. She`s going to get $300 million.
BEHAR: Well, she probably doesn`t want him anymore because of what he did...
WILLARD: Yes.
BEHAR: .. and she figures, hey, I stepped into whatever.
MILLER: Yes. Well, in this case, she allegedly hit him. And with, I don`t know, a nine iron? I don`t know if she used a caddie...
BEHAR: Yes.
MILLER: I don`t know if she had a caddie, if there`s a club that you choose for that.
WILLARD: She -- I don`t know if she used this kind of grip.
MILLER: I don`t know what sort of grip for you know...
BEHAR: She`s a strong woman...
WILLARD: Yes.
BEHAR: ... physically and mentally, I think.
WILLARD: I mean she used the baseball grip.
BEHAR: Yes, look at this he`s shirtless in the February issue of "Vanity Fair". look at that. See that? Shook the shirt off his back all right. He saved golf now he`s saving print media. I love it.
The author of the article says Woods is a sex addict. Do you think he`s a sex addict or is he just what she says? If he can lick himself, he`ll do it?
WILLARD: I think it turns into being an addict also, but I mean when does in your interest in sex turn into being an addict? Everyone is interested in the sex. But I think it is how much you act on it.
BEHAR: Well he`s...
WILLARD: But he`s got the money and he can act on it. But that`s not -- kind of a good addiction to have, isn`t it?
MILLER: I don`t know if the word is...
BEHAR: I don`t know Fred, Fred -- you need to be reprogrammed here. It`s not a good addiction to have.
WILLARD: It`s better than drugs or alcohol or cutting yourself with a razor.
BEHAR: How about exercise? That`s a good addiction to have. Cheating with 100 blondes is not a good addiction.
WILLARD: A 100? I think he`s going for that, yes.
BEHAR: Yes, yes.
MILLER: It`s not the word is not addict, Joy. It`s -- oh, man, that`s what it is. Man. He`s a man.
BEHAR: Ok.
WILLARD: Another thing to bring in to the equation was how pretty his wife is.
BEHAR: She`s beautiful.
WILLARD: She`s beautiful woman.
BEHAR: It has nothing to do with it.
WILLARD: No.
BEHAR: It has absolutely nothing to do with it. Beautiful women get husbands who cheat more, I think, sometimes.
WILLARD: Yes. Maybe -- I`m sure he was thinking about his wife every time he did it. And probably comparing and saying, I am so lucky -- while he`s having sex with...
BEHAR: Yes.
WILLARD: I am so lucky to have a woman at home. You don`t really understand me. You don`t know my needs. My wife...
BEHAR: Yes, right, we`ve heard that a million times.
MILLER: Blah, blah...
BEHAR: Ok, if you`ve traveled over the holidays you probably faced major security delays thanks to the failed crotch bomber.
Now, Fred let me ask you, you are flying all over the country. You told me you live in Los Angeles and you took a plane to get here. Were you scared on the plane?
WILLARD: No, not at all. I`ve never -- not gotten into that phobia yet. I don`t understand why. I fear a lot of things, but flying...
BEHAR: Like, what else do you fear?
WILLARD: Well, oh geez, banging doors in hotel rooms, driving down the highway and having someone come the wrong way. I don`t want to get into this. But flying, it`s strange. You get into a plane, and you take off. And oh, this is fine, we`re 60,000 feet in the air.
I think people -- and I found the security getting, I -- we flew Sunday. It was no tougher than it was. And I think people are kind of just annoyed by the whole thing, that they`ve been searching us and body patting us and x-raying us and here some guy gets on in the Middle East...
BEHAR: Yes.
WILLARD: He`s on a wanted list, he has a bomb in his underwear.
BEHAR: Well, he got on in Amsterdam actually and he`s coming from Africa.
WILLARD: Yes.
BEHAR: Yes.
WILLARD: And he was on the wanted list. I think people kind of had it.
BEHAR: Yes.
WILLARD: Now stop searching me. Search me but let`s...
BEHAR: So, it`s interesting people are more afraid of the -- more annoyed with the inconvenience than they are about being blown out of the sky.
WILLARD: We put up with it.
BEHAR: I`m not in that.
MILLER: Yes.
WILLARD: But we put up with it.
BEHAR: Are you, Stephanie?
MILLER: Well, first of all I know a few people that have flown from Amsterdam with some things up not just look, body cavities. Anyway, that`s not important now, but...
WILLARD: Stephanie was searched three times in your green room. I thought that was excessive.
BEHAR: Well, that`s (INAUDIBLE) idea...
WILLARD: I said search me if you want. They said, no, you`re all right Mr. Willard.
(CROSSTALK)
MILLER: All right, I just have to ask you, are you just happy to see me or is that liquid explosive in your pants?
BEHAR: Ok. Thank you guys.
Remember the good old days when your only worry on a plane was whether the guy next to you would drool or snore? Now you have to worry that sparks are coming out of his crotch.
Last week some crackpot got on a plane from Amsterdam to Detroit and tried to set off a bomb he was hiding in his underpants. What`s next? Brassieres, a Double D with TNT?
The ACLU is standing in the way of body scanners which they say would be an invasion of privacy. Now I`m as progressive as the next one. Hell I would raise my own taxes if I could. But when it comes to personal safety I`m Dick Cheney in drag.
I would like to point out that body scanning, for me, is a win/win. First of all we`ll be safer. And, secondly, it will force me to lose weight. Usually for a man to see me naked I have to be in his will. But for the sake of safety, I`ll make an exception and just go on a diet.
We`ll be right back.
(COMMERCIAL BREAK)
(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)
UNIDENTIFIED MALE: What happened to your clothes, son?
UNIDENTIFIED MALE: I didn`t even ask of them.
UNIDENTIFIED MALE: Damn them.
UNIDENTIFIED MALE: They told me I was even lucky to keep my knickers.
UNIDENTIFIED MALE: That nightmare is over.
Why don`t you have any clothes on, Nick?
UNIDENTIFIED MALE: Solidarity.
UNIDENTIFIED MALE: Thanks for getting us.
(END VIDEOTAPE)
BEHAR: That was a clip from the new movie "Youth in Revolt." I`m back with the great Fred Willard.
FRED WILLARD, ACTOR: Thank you.
That clip came out of those two young rascals that had just been thrown out of a girl`s dormitory and were pretending that one guy was an illegal alien.
BEHAR: So what was it like being naked in the car with two guys? Was it like old times, Fred?
WILLARD: Oh, dear. You know, the thing is the book -- there`s a book "Youth in Revolt". They have some very explicit sexual situations with the men.
A friend of mine called me up a couple of weeks ago and said I saw you in a preview of a movie, you`re in a truck with three men and you`re all naked. I said good lord, what have they done to me? With CGI. No, we had trousers on, of course.
(CROSSTALK)
BEHAR: Sure. Ok, whatever you say.
WILLARD: I insisted on that, trust me.
BEHAR: You know, I love you in those Christopher Guest movies.
WILLARD: They`re wonderful, aren`t they?
BEHAR: They`re wonderful. My favorite is "Best in Show". What`s your fave?
WILLARD: My favorite was "Waiting for Gotham". Because that was the first one; it`s about theater people.
"Best in Show" did the most for me. People seemed to like that. And everyone, for a couple of years after that, any time there was a dog show or something, I would be called to come down to do my witty repartee with dogs which is hard to do because I was playing a character in that movie and he...
BEHAR: Yes, but you improvised all that, right?
WILLARD: Yes, it was improvised and it was a lot of fun.
BEHAR: It just came to you, all those crazy questions you were asking about the dogs. Fabulous.
WILLARD: Yes. And nothing was going on down in front of us. We just had to make it up. They told us what was happening. Here is the sporting dogs, here`s the terriers. We did it in about two takes.
BEHAR: Really?
WILLARD: Yes.
BEHAR: Just brilliant.
WILLARD: Thank you.
BEHAR: You`re an improv actor basically, right?
WILLARD: Kind of. I`m forced into it. It scares me still.
BEHAR: It does?
WILLARD: Yes.
BEHAR: Your training was in Second City.
WILLARD: Second city.
BEHAR: And what else did I read? Ace Trucking Company.
WILLARD: Ace Trucking Company...
BEHAR: That was New York.
WILLARD: That was New York, yes. We had a lot of fun. We do a show and it would be 30, 40 minutes of set material and then we would improvise. And we had a kind of a backup if an improv wasn`t going well. One of the guys would put on a little crown, have a little thing that come out and say I`m the bad improv fairy. This sketch is over. It`s an easy out, you know.
BEHAR: Really?
WILLARD: Yes.
BEHAR: I haven`t had the pleasure to see this film that we were talking about. But "Youth in Revolt".
WILLARD: I think it`s very charming. Michael Sarah is such a great - - I want to say kid but he`s not a kid. He celebrated his 21st birthday on the set. His mom was there.
BEHAR: Yes. But this was not an improvised script. This was scripted right?
WILLARD: No. It`s scripted. I think you could get of a little bit. Miguel (INAUDIBLE), the director, I think after about the third take he would say if you want to add something. But it was pretty much -- it was well written.
BEHAR: I look forward to seeing it. Thank you so much for doing the show, Fred. You`re always a pleasure. I`m just a big admirer of yours.
WILLARD: Thank you very much. You`re about to have three passes (ph) -- I have nothing to do with that. But I`ll see what I can do. You want two?
BEHAR: No, that`s all right. I`ll pay for mine.
(CROSSTALK)
"Youth in Revolt" opens this Friday.
Back in a minute with Dr. Oz. Stay there.
(COMMERCIAL BREAK)
BEHAR: New Year`s is over. And I`ll bet half the country has resolved to lose weight this year. Joining me in the studio is someone who can actually help make that happen, he`s TV`s favorite doctor. If, of course, you don`t count McDreamy and McSteamy, he`s host of the Dr. Oz Show and he`s the real thing. And he is the author of "You On A Diet: The Owner`s Manual For Waist Management." Dr. Oz welcome to the show. Can I call you Mehm?
DR. MEHMET OZ, DOCTOR AND AUTHOR: Mehmet please, anything.
BEHAR: No one calls you Mehm?
OZ: They call me Mehm but you know what that`s the joy name for me now, you know.
BEHAR: Mehm, okay, Mehm. So you know, you`re very good at compressing ideas. So you say that it takes two weeks to form new habits?
OZ: Well most folks go into a New Year`s resolution
BEHAR: Yes.
OZ: And say I`m going to drop my old habit and maybe get one of these new ones on board. But that`s not how the brain works. The brain has synaptic connections, little pieces of glue that hold together the different parts of the brain.
BEHAR: Uh huh.
OZ: And you have this thing called miracle grow, a hormone just like that.
BEHAR: Like a chia pet?
OZ: Like a chia pet exactly, growing out of your ears and eyes as you grow older. But it actually gets your neurons to connect together more intelligently. But you got to train it. It takes about two weeks to train the brain to do anything, whether you are learning to juggle, playing the piano, host a show. It takes two weeks. Dieting is the same thing.
BEHAR: Really?
OZ: Once you adopt a new program then over time it will become the norm for you and you get rid of that old habit after awhile.
BEHAR: So in the first two weeks when you are trying to lose weight, you should be strict?
OZ: It`s not a matter of being strict, Joy.
BEHAR: Oh.
OZ: You got to adopt a behavior that makes sense for you. It has to be fun and cool and jazz you up. If you don`t get up in the morning, if you`re not psyched up about doing it, it`s not going to work for you. And that`s the biggest mistake we make. So whatever program you want to get into, doesn`t violate the biology of blubber, which means the basic fundamental way your body responds to food. So you can naturally go back to your playing weight which is your weight when you are 18 to 20 years of age.
BEHAR: How do you know your blubber rate?
OZ: Well the first thing you want to do is focus on the right number. You don`t care about the weight you care about the waist.
BEHAR: The waist?
OZ: The book`s subtitle is the Owner`s Manual To Waist Management.
BEHAR: Oh I see.
OZ: We`re not talking about the company.
BEHAR: Yes, yes, yes.
OZ: Right, we`re talking about your waist size. Now why is that? Because most folks don`t recognize, I don`t care about fat thighs. Joy you know what, if you got fat thighs you`ll lose a couple dates. Who cares? As a doctor, I`m more worried about your belly fat. Because the belly fat is called the omentum. And it`s this big, robust level of fat and it squeezes on the kidneys and causes high blood pressure, and it poisons your liver, causes high cholesterol and it blocks insulin and that causes you to have diabetes. So the first thing people go to do is know their waist size. Do you know your waist size?
BEHAR: No. If I did, I`m not telling you.
OZ: Right, now, first time ever on the Joy Behar Show, I`m going to teach you how to do this. How tall are you?
BEHAR: 5`4 and 3/4".
OZ: Make it 5`5".
BEHAR: Okay
OZ: Now your waist should never be more than half you height. So, 5 time 12 is 60 inches?
BEHAR: Yes.
OZ: Plus 5 is 65 inches.
BEHAR: Yes, my waist should be 65 inches.
OZ: No, should be half of than that. 32 1/2". Is it?
BEHAR: No, I don`t think so. No, no, no, no, no.
OZ: Yes.
BEHAR: Oh my god, who told you could do this?
OZ: I was assured you would be -- let`s go. That`s the inseam size. There we go. Let`s find out. Suck it in. Suck it in. Oh, 31 1/2".
BEHAR: Seriously?
OZ: Very impressive.
BEHAR: No kidding? I`m underweight?
OZ: I`m serious. You`re underweight. She`s positively anorexic.
BEHAR: Are you kidding me, forget the Weight Watchers I was going to go on this week.
OZ: Now here`s the deal, now you might want to look hotter.
BEHAR: But I want to lose it down here a little.
OZ: There`s good beauty reasons to lose it but the medical reason to lose it is for the waist size.
BEHAR: Oh.
OZ: And that number works for men, women and females. And please for women out there, this is really important. Guys over the age of 40 will never buy a new size belt. What they do is they take the belt and they flip it beneath the fat and walk around like this, right?
BEHAR: That`s attractive.
OZ: Exactly, so you have to go and measure their waist size at their belly button.
BEHAR: Oh okay, all right.
OZ: That`s the number.
BEHAR: So now we know you have to measure your waist, it has to be a certain number.
OZ: Right.
BEHAR: Otherwise you`re in a lot of trouble. You`re going to get health problems, right?
OZ: It`s the number one driver of health in America and if you don`t deal with obesity we won`t have a health care budget we can balance, period.
BEHAR: Okay let`s do this synopsis you were talking about.
OZ: Yes.
BEHAR: Now in the first two weeks that you try to do this, what are the things you should be doing?
OZ: So first thing is to detox the refrigerator.
BEHAR: Detox the refrigerator.
OZ: Now why is that?
BEHAR: Throw out the transfats?
OZ: Well, you have to throw out the transfats, that`s obvious. But it`s actually the saturated fats, the fats that are solid at room temperature and this is really important, all the white foods, the white sugar, the white flour, the white pasta, the white bread, all that goes.
BEHAR: That is so racist.
OZ: Yes, I know it`s terrible. It`s terrible but it`s true. And of course the other big thing is high fructose corn syrup.
BEHAR: A lot of things have it.
OZ: Yes because it`s cheap sugar but it`s poisonous to the liver. And by the way, if you have a soft drink at lunch, for example, not only do you get the extra 160 calories from the soft drink you`ll eat an extra 125 calories. And this is the most important thing I`m going to say today. The entire obesity epidemic is about 100 calories of too much food a day.
BEHAR: 100 calories?
OZ: That`s it. That`s it. If you are going to lose weight, the way to do it is to shave 100 calories off. So if you have a soft drink that extra 125 calories you eat because the drink poisons your system and doesn`t let you realize how to manage your weight -- there it is.
BEHAR: No but look, I drink -- this is a diet coke because it has caffeine in it. And I like to keep myself awake.
OZ: Well let me ask you a question about diet sodas. I`m not picking on any one company.
BEHAR: Yes, it`s all right.
OZ: Diet sodas in general, you think if they help you diet they would market that fact?
BEHAR: I don`t think it`s going to help me diet, no. I don`t believe that. But it does have a little caffeine in it. It`s better than coffee, which makes me throw up.
OZ: Coffee, throwing up is not so attractive perhaps, but number one source of antioxidants in America natural, so and it`s a natural real food.
BEHAR: Yes.
OZ: So you`re better off with coffee without the sugar and cream.
BEHAR: Yes but it gives you a stomach ache at 3:00 or 4:00 in the afternoon.
OZ: if you don`t like it`s a separate issue. But the caffeine is the caffeine. And you get the caffeine from any sources. My problem with diet sodas, is that the artificial sweeteners in them, although I don`t think they cause cancer. I do think --
BEHAR: You don`t?
OZ: No. I do think they can mess up your system enough that in some cases they`ll actually get you to eat a little more than you normally would have eaten. Yes, the brain is getting a schizophrenic message, Joy. You`re thinking, so your brain is you saying to yourself, wait a minute, you drank something that`s sweet but I don`t feel I got any calories. So what`s going on here?
BEHAR: Uh huh.
OZ: And as you begin to appreciate that, your brain says wait a minute, I need to eat more. Something has to give here. You end up eating more. Sodas often times will put weight on.
BEHAR: Okay, I believe that. What if you put sugar in your coffee or sweeten low, or one of those?
OZ: Well you can use a little sugar, I`m fine with that. You can use Aguave, which is a lot sweeter than sugar.
BEHAR: Aguave.
OZ: Aguave.
BEHAR: Zyletol is another one.
OZ: Well yes but that`s artificial one. Aguave is natural, it`s what you make tequila from.
BEHAR: I see.
OZ: But it`s a lot sweeter than sugar. So there`s a little bit of it --
BEHAR: Aguave, okay, I got to write that down.
OZ: A-g-u-a-v-e.
BEHAR: I know how to spell it. That`s good. What do you think about Splenda and those things, do they cause cancer?
OZ: No, I don`t think any of them really cause cancer. I think a lot of them hang out in the body for a long time.
BEHAR: Yes.
OZ: And we`re not sure in long periods of time what that`s going to mean to us. But the more important thing is they don`t get you where you need to be. What you need to be able to do is automate a system that make sense, that`s elegance, that`s seamless, that effortless gets you where you have to be in life. And to do that, you got to say okay, you know what, from now on I, Joy Behar, when I get up in the morning I`m going to eat this breakfast. I`m never going to vary it I`m going to have that breakfast every single day. I`m going to have my eggs, all my oatmeal, my 100% whole grain.
BEHAR: That doesn`t get monotonous?
OZ: If it does get monotonous shift to a different breakfast that you like. But don`t reinvent the wheel. Don`t go searching for new foods. What ends up happening, after breakfast, for lunch and snacks, you got to do the same thing. Dinner go out and eat it, enjoy it. But if you`re foraging for food at 11:00 in the morning or 5:00 in the afternoon, that bewitching hour, what ends up happening?
BEHAR: You overeat.
OZ: Find whatever food you have there.
BEHAR: Yes. Yes.
OZ: The beauty of the human body is that it will give you feedback. But you should never be hungry.
BEHAR: You know last week I started to do a food diary. And first of all, I realized that I denied myself nothing. Nothing! I looked at what I was eating; I took every pleasure and used it. Okay. Then I said, better not do that. One thing I notice from my food diary is that I do like certain foods. I only like certain things. I don`t eat a million exotic things. So, what you`re saying makes sense. Stick with what you like already and know what they are and stop making crazy choices in the middle of the night, right?
OZ: What you`re looking for, Joy, is that little nudge to take you in the right direction. What most of us do is 11:00 at night, where really irritated at our spouse, we`re mad about our job, the finances aren`t going well. What do you do? You head down to the kitchen like a reptile in search of food. Foraging through the cabinets and the refrigerator. Whatever is there is there. What we need to do is make it easy to do the right thing. Don`t make a difficult decision in your kitchen, make a difficult decision in the supermarket, go out and buy the foods
BEHAR: Okay.
OZ: that you know are natural
BEHAR: Right.
OZ: In your best interest.
BEHAR: And plan a little bit?
OZ: Little bit.
BEHAR: Okay now, what is this about a whole grain bread, eat a piece of whole grain bread with olive oil every day before dinner for two weeks. Why?
OZ: Because the biology of blubber, getting back to that concept is very fundamental here. What makes your stomach growl is a chemical called grelin. Say it.
BEHAR: Grelin.
OZ: Yes, sounds like gremlin, right?
BEHAR: Yes.
DR. OZ: Now, it`s what makes you`re stomach growl but it also reminds you are hungry. And it`s shouts louder and louder and louder via chemically into your brain until you finally break down and eat whatever is in front of you. Now a half an hour after you eat a meal, the grelin level will go back to normal. But Joy in half an hour, you`ve had three meals.
BEHAR: Right. You`re supposed to take your time and stop at 20 minutes.
OZ: But it`s hard to do that.
BEHAR: Give your body time to metabolize or whatever it is.
OZ: Ideally you do that the grelin will come down. But what we might want to do to beat the system is half an hour before we sit down.
BEHAR: Yes.
OZ: Grab a handful of nuts, a piece of fruit, and some bread with olive oil. Eat that. And that 100 calories of food right then will shut your grelin down.
BEHAR: Yes.
OZ: So by the time you sit down for the meal you`re not hungry anymore. You can leisurely taste everyone else`s food.
BEHAR: You really think that will work?
OZ: Oh no it does work.
BEHAR: See that`s a brilliant idea. That`s a brilliant idea. Because everybody is hungry, hungry, hungry. And the key is to stop the appetite a little bit.
OZ: What I do is -- speaking theoretically here but based on a pretty good science base.
BEHAR: Okay, what about exercising now? I really hate aerobic exercise with a passion. The only exercise I like is horseback riding because you can sit. Seriously, so, I mean, I like stretching and I like a little core work and I`ll do burst training now, which is like 12 minutes fast, fast, fast, then slow, slow, slow, fast, fast, fast. What do you think of that routine? Could I lose weight with that?
OZ: There is no way for you to sustainably lose waist size.
BEHAR: My waist is fabulous you told me.
OZ: Yes but if you want to look more beautiful and lose the fat thighs, there`s no way to do that without putting on muscle mass. The biggest problem I think with obesity and women going through menopause. And women say, you know what, I`m going through my ovaries aren`t making estrogen. Have you ever heard that right? But guess what else the ovaries make, they make testosterone.
BEHAR: The ovaries make testosterone?
OZ: Yes, and without testosterone, you don`t make muscle anymore. So let me not don`t just lose libido --
BEHAR: So you have to do aerobic?
OZ: No, build muscle mass.
BEHAR: Muscle mass which is weights.
OZ: Or lift your own body weight. That works too.
BEHAR: Yes. yes.
OZ: You don`t have to go out and be a power lifter. But you can do basic exercise, you now, yoga work, calisthenics, things that allow your body to be your gym.
BEHAR: Okay.
OZ: Easy, cheap, and work.
BEHAR: Okay very good, more with Dr. Oz, I want to talk about sex when we come back, in just a minute.
(COMMERCIAL BREAK)
BEHAR: We`re back with the host of the "Dr. O Show." Dr. Oz, one of the suggestions in your book is to have more sex. Does your wife know about this?
OZ: My wife, actually I thought of this show as foreplay. But you know that`s the reality. I`m coming home soon.
BEHAR: We`re like the bread with the olive oil on it? I think.
OZ: Exactly.
BEHAR: I see.
OZ: Dip a little here. A little bit of sex in the show and then I go home.
BEHAR: Gottia, well also I want to talk about getting older. You were mentioning menopause and everything else. The metabolism gets very sluggish around 35 and 40, even then, right?
OZ: It`s true. The sexual famine is more than just physical problems but emotionally how we deal with it. We have to set ourselves up to deal with it.
BEHAR: The sexual famine, you call it. Tiger Woods doesn`t have sexual famine.
OZ: No he doesn`t.
BEHAR: He`s the using it all up over there so these don`t have any.
OZ: Yes, sexual bulimia and then sexual anorexics.
BEHAR: Well a lot of it is about lack of desire I was reading lack of a desire, sex. How do you fix that? After you`re married several years, the thing starts to dwindle down. Let`s face it.
OZ: Well I don`t know if you have to face it. A quarter of older Americans, mature Americans still have great sex. In fact, they`re more relaxed about it. They`ve gotten through the growing years; they`ve got the kids a little bit older now.
BEHAR: How old are you talking about?
OZ: I`m talking about people over the age of 60, a quarter them have sex routinely. As if they were young people. So the question we should be asking ourselves is why aren`t all of us having sex when we`re 65 or 70 but how come a quarter of us are still going strong? And here is my secret.
BEHAR: What about Viagra? I mean that`s the reason that they`re having more sex, isn`t it?
OZ: Oh Viagara works.
BEHAR: In the nursing homes it`s like crack cocaine of the nursing homes.
OZ: It is.
BEHAR: They`re jumping in and out of each other`s beds. You`re talking 60. How about 80?
OZ: They do. People are getting picked up on the streets for making out in their 80s. And women now have an equivalent for Viagra that we think is going to work pretty well as well.
BEHAR: Really? Wait tell me a little bit about that.
OZ: I`ll send you some.
BEHAR: What does it do?
OZ: It works in a similar fashion and it stimulates the female libido as well but here`s the bigger story.
BEHAR: Really?
OZ: Yes. You have to reinvent your relationships every seven years.
BEHAR: Every seven years?
OZ: You to reconnect them. I don`t care if it`s work or even --
BEHAR: How do you do that?
OZ: Well listen, figure out these women marry the men that they planned on marrying because they see his future and they want him to change and become that men. Men marry, naively the woman that they think they`ll have the rest of their life and she goes and changes. So you`ve got to people moving in opposite directions.
BEHAR: So the guy stays the same and the woman keeps changing, is that the issue?
OZ: Yes. And both of them expected the opposite. So what we really wanted to be able to do is reconnect. And so every seven years when the chemical handcuffs of love come off - because when you first meet you got builtamin (ph) surges, the romantic love.
BEHAR: Oh, yeah, baby. I remember it well.
OZ: Okay, then you have oxytocin because you`re coupling and bonding. You have the kids and all that stuff. Then seven years later when those chemical handcuffs are gone, you have to find other ways to be intimate with each other. I mean, you can start off with very simple ways. Things like cuddling, as crazy as they sound, work. Because if you take away the pressure to have sex and just let people get together, spend time close together physically.
BEHAR: Yes.
OZ: And it matures once a week, you got it made. But here is a story for a lot of couples to realize. There is a survival benefit, a survival benefit measured in about three years from going from the average amount of sex a year, which is once a week, to doubling that, twice a week. So if you can go from having sex 50 time a week to 110 times a week roughly you`ll increase your life expectancy, if you`re a guy.
BEHAR: So this means Tiger Woods will live to be 200 years old.
OZ: He can probably outlive all of us probably. But you got to be monogamous loving.
BEHAR: Oh it has - so there`s the caviar.
OZ: There`s the caviar.
BEHAR: I see.
OZ: And by the way for women it`s not the amount, it`s the quality.
BEHAR: Of course, we know that.
OZ: You know that.
BEHAR: Which brings me to the next point. I read yesterday in the paper that they have decided that the G spot does not exist. Which I knew. I was going to have a search party to locate mine. I mean, the G spot, who made that up? Some man made that up, right?
OZ: I actually disagree with the paper.
BEHAR: You think it does exist?
OZ: Yes.
BEHAR: How do you know that?
OZ: Well it`s not just from personal experience. I`ll speak honestly about the female reproductive system.
BEHAR: Yes, sure, go ahead.
OZ: So the male prostate doesn`t disappear in the women. Where does it go? Where does the prostate -- the testes are the ovaries, right?
BEHAR: Yes.
OZ: The penis becomes the clitoris, right?
BEHAR: Yes.
OZ: So there are some parallels in men and women.
BEHAR: Okay.
OZ: What happened to the prostate? Where did it go?
BEHAR: I don`t know.
OZ: You never thought about that before?
BEHAR: Where is it?
OZ: It becomes the G spot.
BEHAR: The prostate becomes the G spot?
OZ: All the nerves in the prostate --
BEHAR: Then why -- where is it?
OZ: Right where it`s supposed to be on the back wall of the uterus -- of the vagina. But here`s the catch. It`s not a one little dime size that you can put your finger in there and find. That`s not how it works.
BEHAR: No.
OZ: It`s a plexus of nerves, it`s a whole region of the female entire the front wall of the vagina and if you stimulate that area, guess what you secrete, material just like prosthetic secretions.
BEHAR: Really?
OZ: Yes. So I`m quite certain it exists there. Whether you can stimulate it in all women, that`s -- why are you dubious about that?
BEHAR: Because I mean it takes too long to find it. You might as well just go for the outside action. You know what I`m saying?
OZ: What do you mean by that?
BEHAR: You know what I mean. Let`s not get any - go over there, do this. Okay. So, you say that people -- we have a little time for this. What are some of the deadly sins that people are committing health wise, I guess?
OZ: Seven big deadly sin.
BEHAR: What are they?
OZ: First get up in the morning because you need to stretch.
BEHAR: You need to stretch?
OZ: Yes.
BEHAR: Like a cat?
OZ: Like a cat. Or taichi which is what they do in China. Or do a little yoga.
BEHAR: I did do that this morning.
OZ: Simple stuff, yes, yes. And the reason why you want to do that is because it gets you started in the right step. But it also avoids the minor aches and pains that wipe you out.
Number two, you got to have breakfast.
BEHAR: Right.
OZ: Number three, you got to where you want to be on time. Let me emphasize that for a reason. People who get places late and a lot of doctors like, I have to admit on this as well, we work on surgical standard time, not eastern standard time specifically.
BEHAR: Right.
OZ: And what happens when you`re late, you lose control of your life. You don`t control the agenda anymore because you got there late, you`re on the defensive. So you from now on, you`re New Year`s resolution ought to be if you`re not five minutes early, you`re late.
BEHAR: Oh.
OZ: And that puts you into control what`s going on during the day.
BEHAR: So stretch, eat breakfast, and make sure that you`re on time?
OZ: And that`s the start for the day.
BEHAR: Okay we`re not done with Dr. Oz because this is just great stuff. So we`ll be back with your questions when we come back. So stay there.
(COMMERCIAL BREAK)
BEHAR: We`re back with Dr. Oz. I have some questions on Twitter.
OZ: Fire away.
BEHAR: Well first of all, someone want to know there`s a rumor that your kids did not get flu shots or swine flu shots is that right?
OZ: That`s true, they did not.
BEHAR: Do you not believe in them for the kids or what?
OZ: No, I would have vaccinated my kids but you know I - I`m in a happy marriage and my wife who makes most of the important decisions as most couples have in their lives.
BEHAR: Yes.
OZ: Who absolutely refuses. And listen the kids are pretty healthy. We actually think two of them caught swine flu very early on anyway. So there`s no point vaccinating them again. And you know -
BEHAR: What do you, on that same subject, what do you think about this controversy that`s going around about vaccinations and autism and other little things that happens to kids?
OZ: I think kids like the canary and the coal mine. That they are more susceptible to some of the toxins maybe our generation was able to overcome. That`s why we have a lot more allergies now. Perhaps one of the reason why we have more autism. But I don`t think it`s just the vaccine.
BEHAR: No.
OZ: Although, I don`t want to ignore the potential role they have. So what we do with our kids is we spread the vaccine out.
BEHAR: Right, so why don`t the doctors just do that?
OZ: It`s a lot more expensive and kids fall through the cracks.
BEHAR: Yes.
OZ: It`s hard enough to get in there once a year for the shots and imagine if you have to bring them in every other month. And those two factors are a big issue.
BEHAR: I see.
OZ: Plus, we have no evidence at all, Joy, none, that they actually cause autism.
BEHAR: Right.
OZ: And a lot of doctors very reasonably say, listen, why you want to spend more money, cause more hardship for the kids and their families, if we don`t think it`s really a problem. But you know if you want to be cautious, you can do what we did.
BEHAR: Well, I don`t remember getting this many shots when I was a kid. Or my daughter getting as many shots.
OZ: We did Joy. When you and I were -
BEHAR: She got the measles on her own. She got chicken pox on her on, so what?
OZ: We got exposed to ten vaccines when we were kids. Children today are now getting closer to 30. So there`s a big difference between the exposure amounts and, plus, we have a much purer environment that we grew up in and compared to what kids are exposed to today.
BEHAR: That - that brings me to this question, is there anything wrong with constantly using hand sanitizers? Don`t we need to be exposed to germs once in a while?
OZ: Well hand sanitizers are the best of all the options because they`re not anti microbial which means they`re not going to stimulate resistant bacteria. And listen, the biggest side effect of using hand sanitizers, your hands will get chapped. So you know, use it with a cream at the same time.
BEHAR: But are they effective?
OZ: Hand sanitizers are very effective, oh no, they are very effective. They kill viruses better than anything else we have in the hospitals. The hospital by the way, I still operate, we use hand santizers all the time.
BEHAR: Yes.
OZ: 30, 40 times a day I`ll be using hand sanitizers.
BEHAR: Ok I`m going fast because I have so many things to ask you. This new body scan idea that they`re using at the airports, can that be dangerous radiation wise.
OZ: We`ll it`s got a very small fraction of the radiation a chest X-ray will give you. And it`s about equivalent to the amount of radiation that you get after an hour in the sky.
BEHAR: Uh-huh. Not to bad.
OZ: So I don`t think they`re very toxic for that reason. I`m very much against some of the searching tactics we are using in general. Because I don`t think they are very effective. And I`m very concerned that a lot of security measures that are used are primarily designed if you and I think we were safer.
BEHAR: Well you mean the taking off the shoes and the liquids.
OZ: Yes, yes.
BEHAR: But the body scanners would help. I believe in those.
OZ: Maybe. But they are pretty innovative people. And I can think right at the top of my head of a couple of different ways to blow a plane out of the sky that wouldn`t be protected by a body scanner. I`m not trying to do that but I`m not sure -
BEHAR: It would be harder, you want to at least make it more difficult. Although there are body cavities. Hello.
OZ: There are body cavities. And there are things we may not even know exist right now that people can smartly bring out of the plane.
BEHAR: They seem to always be a little bit ahead of us sometimes.
OZ: (UNINTELLIGIBLE)
BEHAR: Anyway thank you so much, Dr. Oz.
OZ: Yes, yes hurry.
BEHAR: I think you are just miraculous.
OZ: Enchante.
BEHAR: And thanks to all my guests for joining me tonight. Good night everybody.
END