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Glenn Beck
More Protests Planned Over Immigration Reform; Ad Exec Provides Advice on Selling Economy; Why Are Today`s Youth Poor Achievers?
Aired May 16, 2006 - 19:00 ET
THIS IS A RUSH TRANSCRIPT. THIS COPY MAY NOT BE IN ITS FINAL FORM AND MAY BE UPDATED.
GLENN BECK, HOST: So the president unveiled his immigration policy last night, and it sounds to me a little like he wants to put the illegals that are already here on that path to citizenship.
I mean, George, why don`t you just help them get here from Mexico, as well? I`ve got a couple of ideas. There`s always the giant fan with the little sombreros. You have the merry-go-round, which starts here in Mexico and goes all the way to the United States. Or if those don`t work, you could always the giant trampoline? Boing!
All right. Let me just remind you right off the bat here that I am a conservative. I want to live in a world with low taxes, oil drilling in Alaska and Pizza Huts on every street corner in Baghdad. Ah.
So take that into account when I say this: Mr. President, please, man, you`re losing me. Your speech last night was filled with more holes and bad ideas than an episode of "Joey", and that was canceled yesterday.
If Chuck Schumer`s reaction to your speech was, "Hey, that sounds like a really good plan," then you`ve got to ask yourself, gee, has something gone horribly wrong?
Here`s how the speech started.
(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)
GEORGE W. BUSH, PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES: The United States must secure its borders. This is a basic responsibility of a sovereign nation. It is also an urgent requirement of our national security.
(END VIDEO CLIP)
BECK: OK. All of the sudden, tackling illegal immigration is an urgent requirement? Hasn`t this been a problem for, oh, I don`t know, forever? I`ve known this for years, and I can barely read or write. And now, suddenly, it`s urgent? Are you kidding me?
Then, the president went on to outline his solution for this "urgent" problem.
(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)
BUSH: We will construct high-tech fences in urban corridors, and build new patrol roads and barriers in rural areas. We will employ motion sensors, infrared cameras, and unmanned aerial vehicles to prevent illegal crossings.
(END VIDEO CLIP)
BECK: OK, so let me get this straight. Instead of a giant wall, we have unarmed paper pushers from the National Guard -- God bless those guys, let`s give them a break -- what sounds kind of like model airplanes, surveillance cameras similar to the ones that they have there at your local 7-Eleven, and people never break into those places.
Let me ask you something, Mr. President. If we replaced the fence around the White House with a virtual fence, how would you sleep tonight?
I didn`t hate everything in the speech. He did talk about respecting the law and a guest worker program that kind of made sense, but he barely mentioned the companies and going after those companies that hire illegals. These people are getting fat from the illegals.
And your security proposal is a joke. I mean, I know you wanted to find the middle ground, but sometimes you have to find a higher ground. You can`t please everybody.
Tomorrow, an immigrant group planning yet another day of protests -- yay -- with demonstrations at the White House. Leading the illegal army will be Juan Carlos Ruiz. He is a member of the We Are America, a pro- immigrant alliance group.
Juan, you know what? I think we can join on this. I may join you tomorrow. For different reasons, but I don`t want it to pass either, sir.
JUAN CARLOS RUIZ, WE ARE AMERICA: Well, we welcome you joining us, because we agree on a couple of things. The president presented a statement that was full of holes, and that`s not fixing the immigration problem that`s broken in this country.
BECK: Let me ask you this, I mean, did you see the poll numbers after the last group of protests? I think America hears you. They just don`t like what they see.
RUIZ: What do you mean, what they are seeing?
BECK: They don`t like -- when you see the protests that have happened, America should have responded to that, and I think they did respond to that. They don`t like the ideas of people coming in, taking healthcare, taking medical care, using the educational system, coming in and cutting in front of other people who are trying to do it the right way. They don`t like seeing that.
RUIZ: I agree with you, but I think also that you are not telling the whole truth. The truth is that we, the immigrant community, pay more taxes in this country, does more contribution to this country in comparison with the little things with education and health. I also believe that we need to provide health and education to all our children.
BECK: Let me interrupt here. I think this is the biggest red herring that I have heard. Because I hear people on your side of the issue saying this all the time, that hey, these guys are paying taxes. You know what? We`re screwing the illegal immigrants out of their benefits. They`re paying into Social Security.
RUIZ: Right.
BECK: They never see that money come back. How is that a good thing for the illegal immigrant?
RUIZ: I think the good thing for America is that we have a good force, a good working force here. They are willing to cover the -- and they are willing to work here and come here to build this country. So while we are asking you to let us come out of the shadows and to help build a strong America.
BECK: Well, see, I agree with you on this. I really do. I am so pro-immigrant. I think too many Americans are fat and lazy, which we`re going to get into here in a second. You know, we take so much for granted. It`s the new blood into our system that reminds us what we have.
However, what part of "illegal immigrant" don`t you understand?
RUIZ: I don`t think I agree with you with Americans. Americans are hard-working people, and the problem is that we have a...
BECK: Come on, seriously, have you been for a fast-food restaurant lately?
RUIZ: American people are hard-working people, and I believe that we are here for filling the marketplace where there`s an opening for us to be here and create this great economy.
BECK: Again, I`m with you on that. So why not come here legally?
RUIZ: Because the system doesn`t allow it.
BECK: Then let`s fix that.
RUIZ: The immigration system is broken, and we want to fix it. We encourage you to come out with us tomorrow and help us...
BECK: I would love to fix that. I`ll tell you what. I`ll help you fix that if you stop the tide of people coming across the border in the middle of the night. Come through the front door, not through the side window.
RUIZ: I think that is an unrealistic call. The truth is that we have an immigration system that is broken. And I hope that the president see that and we need comprehensive reform that can take people out of the shadows and can really help us to deal with the problem on the borders.
The proposal of President Vicente yesterday was let`s put guards on one side of the border. We want a safe country; we want a safe America also.
BECK: Juan, thank you very much for coming by.
RUIZ: You`re welcome.
ANNOUNCER: This is Glenn Beck.
BECK: I`ve got to tell you, I`m so frustrated. I`m down on Bush because of the immigration thing, but I`m up on Bush because of the economy. But it doesn`t seem like anybody else is. I`m all alone. I think it`s because the president needs to sell the frickin` economy, man, the same way they sell Skittles, with some slick ad campaign or catchy slogan, slogan. I don`t know.
Ted Bell, he`s the former chairman of the ad agency Young and Rubicam out of Chicago, a friend of mine. He`s a best-selling author.
I swear to you, Ted, I`m going to make you the new secretary of advertising.
TED BELL, FORMER CHAIRMAN, YOUNG AND RUBICAM: Well, I think, you know, if you want to do that, Glenn, I`m ready to accept.
BECK: I don`t know if I can officially offer that to you.
BELL: You might want to pass the word along.
BECK: let me ask you this. Before we get into the economy, I know you`re a big conservative. Did he shake you last night?
BELL: He did shake me, because I`m looking for fire in the belly, and I`m looking for conviction, and I`m looking for strong words out of the White House, and I didn`t see it.
BECK: What does he -- what does he have to do to be able to get conservatives back into his own tent?
BELL: I think 90 percent of the people in this country want English to be the language. If there`s ever an issue that`s brought this country together, it`s this one. And...
BECK: Well, he kind of did that last night.
BELL: Sort of.
BECK: He did kind of. He did say, you know, you should learn English.
BELL: Yes, he did say that, that`s true.
BECK: So an American research group found that 30 percent of Americans believe that we`re actually in a recession, which, I mean, wow, if this is a recession, it`s pretty sweet.
BELL: Yes.
BECK: How can it be that 30 percent of America believes that?
BELL: I think it`s because all they hear is gloom and doom from the mainstream media.
BECK: So...
BELL: They`re always focusing on the deficit numbers, which is just one tiny component of the whole thing.
BECK: Right. So what do you -- so what do you do? Let me make you the secretary of advertising.
BELL: I`ll take it.
BECK: Come up with ways to package this here.
BELL: Well, Glenn, I`ve got this like rough campaign idea since we`ve started kicking this around. And I think the way to package this is this is the new 2006 super-turbocharged economy, the American economy.
BECK: Right.
BELL: It`s the biggest, fastest growing economy in the history of the planet.
BECK: I can`t tell that you`ve never done advertising for the Porsche.
BELL: I have done advertising for Porsche.
BECK: I know you have.
BELL: Turbocharged. Turbocharged, man. All cylinders. It`s cooking on all cylinders right now.
BECK: OK.
BELL: Yes, and so I think that`s one of the things. Four million new businesses created since second quarter of `03. Four million new businesses. That`s unbelievable. You don`t hear that on the news.
BECK: This is -- what`s amazing is -- we`re talking illegal immigration -- this is the biggest period of growth for Hispanic businesses. This is the biggest period of growth for black-owned businesses. I mean, the numbers are staggering.
BELL: Yes. I think the other thing you can say is that this economy is blowing the doors off the European imports, if you want to keep that analogy going. Europe and Japan together don`t have as many as new jobs as we`ve had since 2003. Five million new jobs since the second quarter of `03.
You`re not hearing about that, but that`s the truth. And the president needs to take ownership of this booming economy.
BECK: As an ad guy, how would you do...
BELL: Former ad guy.
BECK: I know, former ad guy. I know you`re -- you write a great series, "Hawk" (ph) now, but as a former ad guy, what should the president do? What would you -- if you were in his office and you had it and you were like, "George, listen to me," what would you tell him?
BELL: You know, we`re kidding about this secretary of the advertising idea.
BECK: Yes.
BELL: But I think he needs somebody that`s just telling him on a daily basis, what`s the good news today, Mr. President? What can we say to get out there to the people to counteract all this negative media that we`re seeing?
BECK: You know, but we really are a slogan nation. Give me some slogans.
BELL: We`re a slogan nation. We`ve worked something up here, the boys, you know, in the back room here.
BECK: Yes.
BELL: This is very rough, Glenn.
BECK: Yes.
BELL: And you know, in advertising we only steal from the best.
BECK: Sure, OK.
BELL: So this is a little derivative. But I think you`re going to like it.
BECK: OK. What is it?
BELL: We`re going to just show you the slogan here, and the slogan is "America, the ultimate money machine. I kind of like it, Glenn. I don`t know how you feel.
BECK: Yes. The artwork is a little rough.
BELL: I said it was rough. I said it was rough, Glenn.
BECK: Yes. What else you got?
BELL: That`s all we`ve got.
BECK: That`s it? You are fired, sir! You are fired.
BELL: If you don`t like it, we can work something else up.
BECK: Thanks a lot. Ted Bell.
Back in a minute.
(COMMERCIAL BREAK)
(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)
BECK: Hang on just a second. I think I found John, who actually was proud of the president last night. Go ahead, John.
CALLER: Yes, I was very happy with that speech.
BECK: Good.
CALLER: I`m a little -- I can`t believe people forgot. If you go back five years ago when everybody loved the president, had high approval ratings...
BECK: Hang on just a second.
CALLER: Yes?
BECK: All right. Go ahead.
CALLER: Last night he talked about assimilating. Remember, France, that`s a good thing. That`s more -- that`s more conservative.
BECK: I`m starting to see your point of view.
(END VIDEO CLIP)
BECK: A couple more hits, and it would have made complete sense to me.
You remember when Hillary Clinton criticized the youth of America for being slackers? Turns out -- I never, ever thought I`d hear myself say this -- she may have actually been right. According to a recent census report, 65 percent of recent college graduates will move back in with their parents.
Anyhow, Chelsea Clinton criticized her mother`s remarks by saying, "Hey, Mom, you know, my friends and I, we work really, really hard."
So, did Hillary stand by her statements? No, she apologized. No, seriously, way to stick to your guns, Hillary. Really.
Why are so many kids moving back home? I`ve got to tell you, when my kids turn 18, I`m going to go out on their birthday, they blow out the candles, and start the car they bought with their own money. Bye-bye.
I know the cost of college and daily life, crippling, but it`s also because over the past several years, parents and society have been encouraging their kids to be pretty mediocre. You know, I`m talking about the 9th place ribbons, the trophies for participation. "Everybody wins. That way nobody gets hurt feelings. Yay!"
Here`s the thing; that`s not the way the world works. If you apply for a job and someone else gets it because you`re a moron, you don`t get paid.
Parents, if you don`t want your kids moving back home after college, don`t fool them into thinking they`re good at something when they`re really not. Encourage them to be better. That way, they`ll be doing this -- instead of this -- I`m just saying.
Jean Twenge, she is the author of "Generation Me".
Jean why are kids lazier than we were? Or are they? Is that just a myth?
JEAN TWENGE, AUTHOR, "GENERATION ME": Well, it`s a complex story, because kids now, young people now are actually more ambitious than kids were just 10, 15 years ago. Eighty percent of high school sophomores say they`re going to go to a four-year college. Seventy-five percent of college students say they`re going to go to graduate school.
The problem is these are not realistic expectations. Most of those kids aren`t going to meet those. And guess where they got them? You took the words out of my mouth. Everybody getting a trophy and everybody`s self-esteem being boosted in school.
BECK: Right. And also, I mean, have you ever seen the show "Super Sweet 16"?
TWENGE: Unfortunately, yes.
BECK: My gosh, it is so offensive. There`s absolutely no judgment to that. This is really sick. It`s building people up to look like, hey, you should spend $40,000 on your sweet 16 party.
TWENGE: Yes. And the average 15 years old watching that, that`s exactly what they think. And so many of these shows on MTV, that one and many others, just all they encourage is this narcissism and this sense of entitlement...
BECK: Right.
TWENGE: ... which also is not a good thing.
BECK: Should you and can you -- I mean, I would -- you tell your kids, you really suck?
TWENGE: Well, I`m not sure you should go quite that far.
BECK: Well, I mean, I don`t say it that way. I say, "Honey, wow, you really suck at that." Just to sugar-coat it a bit.
TWENGE: To be realistic, exactly.
BECK: Right.
TWENGE: So kids are going out now, being told like you can be anything you want to be. Think about that statement. It`s just wrong. It`s just not true. So yes, if your kid can`t sing, you`ve got to tell them so they don`t end up making a fool on themselves on "American Idol".
BECK: I will tell you that I, when I tuck my son into bed, I talk to him every night and I say, "What do you want to be when you grow up? You can be president. You can be a ballplayer." At this point maybe he could. Later on in life, he may not have, you know, the brains or, you know, he may inherit some of my athletic skills, so he couldn`t be a ballplayer.
But more importantly, the last thing I say to him every night, "The most important thing you can be, you can be happy." Beyond that, man, what else is there? What should we be teaching our kids?
TWENGE: Well, I think just to have realistic expectations and to see where their true talents are. It`s not a bad thing to help a kid develop a talent that he or she actually has, and then teach them to set those practical and realistic goals, instead of saying these ridiculous things like, you can be anything you want.
BECK: How -- what is the connection between -- because we are such an -- I think we`re self-hating egomaniacs. What is the connection between high self-esteem and depression? Because our kids have both of those going on.
TWENGE: They do, they do, and there`s data to prove it. I have data on 1.3 million young people, and they have higher self-esteem and higher narcissism, but they also have more anxiety and depression.
BECK: Why?
TWENGE: So -- I think there`s a number of reasons. The first thing is, the self is not a great support system. If something goes wrong, it`s all your fault. And you don`t have anybody to fall back on if you`ve always put yourself first. So that`s the first problem.
The other thing is you get these just ridiculous expectations, and then you`re going to inevitably be disappointed, which can lead to a lot of anxiety and depression, too.
BECK: Do you think it has anything to do with the fact that our society is so geared around stuff? And -- and I mean, look at the -- I think the people in Hollywood have got to be miserable. Nothing is real.
From a guy who is very accomplished in, you know, in my own mind, you know, and made a lot of money in my 20s, by the time I was 30, I was a hopeless alcoholic and miserable, because I didn`t have anything that was real. I didn`t -- I didn`t base my life around my family or anything spiritual in nature.
TWENGE: Yes. So there`s the perception that money buys happiness in every ad on TV and almost every show in between those ads, that`s what it tells you, but it`s not true.
BECK: Jean, thank you so much. I appreciate it. Thanks for your time. We`d love to have you back.
TWENGE: OK.
ANNOUNCER: Later on GLENN BECK.
(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)
UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: Super star, that`s what you would like to be. That`s an outcome up.
BECK: For this, I need a life coach. Actually, I probably need a lot more than that.
(END VIDEO CLIP)
(COMMERCIAL BREAK)
BECK: All right. It`s time for today`s "Quality of Life" market update.
The stock of Venezuelan President Hugo Chavez took another nosedive after Chavez responded to a British journalist comparing him to President Bush. Watch this.
(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)
HUGO CHAVEZ, PRESIDENT OF VENEZUELA (through translator): This is the first time I`ve been offended like this in public?
BECK: Really? You should try it more often.
CHAVEZ (through translator): When being compared to the biggest genocide person that...
BECK: Boy, is this translation crappy.
CHAVEZ (through translator): ... humanity in the United States. A killer, genocide, and immoral -- that should be taken to prison.
(END VIDEO CLIP)
BECK: Pretty good. This is probably rude, isn`t it? Sorry.
The guy sounds crazy, right? But maybe while we`re just taking what he said out of context. Maybe it was just a crappy translator, which I stand by. I hate when people take what I say out of context. So, let`s review a couple of the other things that he`s said about George W. Bush.
Now, my Espanol is a little rusty, so bear with me. Here we go. He has said, "Es un Borrico." Translation, "He`s a donkey." I don`t think he is, actually.
"Eres un asesino, un genocida," which I think means, "You`re an assassin and mass murderer."
And finally, "Eres un borracho," which I believe says, "You`re a drunk."
Why all the hate, Hugo? Seriously, why?
Chavez has said that he has a strong oil card to play on the world, and you know, as Americans, how much we love that. He also apparently wants to sell his fleet of American F-16s. How did he get them in the first place? He wants to sell them to Iran or Cuba. Oh, and did I mention that he also got back into office in 2002 via coup?
I may not agree with everything that George Bush does, but I think our policy of not being friendly to foreign leaders who stage bloody coups is probably a good one.
Now news out of Colorado. It has the video gaming sector going way, way down. An Internet video game called "Super Columbine Massacre RPG" is drawing the wrath of Columbine survivors, the good people of Littleton, Colorado, and well, maybe just about everybody else with a pulse.
The game actually allows players to act out the roles of Eric Harris and Dylan Klebold as they murder their Columbine High School classmates and eventually kill themselves. And the fun ensues.
The creator of the game, who wants to remain anonymous -- gee, I wonder why -- defended himself in today`s "Rocky Mountain News." He said, quote, hey man, "if I made a film in which the main character was Adolph Hitler, I might be up for an Oscar nomination." Actually, that`s not saying much. "Conversely, if I made a videogame in which Hitler was the main character, well, I`d be buried in anti-defamation charges. I mean, honestly, I`m not sure why videogames are held to a larger degree of scrutiny."
Let`s see. Maybe it`s because video games are played by children?
And finally tonight, the U.S. government released a new video of the plane hitting the Pentagon on 9/11. That sent the stock of Charlie Sheen, Hollywood conspiracy theorist, tumbling.
Oh, Charlie, what a month you`re having. First your wife accuses you of being an abusive gay child porn addict, and now the video comes out against your dumb theories. Tomorrow we are trying desperately to find somebody who actually agrees with Charlie Sheen about 9/11. Don`t miss tomorrow`s episode of the Glenn Beck program.
(COMMERCIAL BREAK)
(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)
BECK: Bill Clinton built -- get this -- a 40-mile wall. Well, 40 miles, it`s not like I could get a couple of gallons of gas and drive around that massive wall.
Do you hear me praising Bill Clinton for the 40-mile wall? No. Why? It`s a joke!
You need a 40-mile wall? I`ll tell you what the need: You need everybody in Texas holding hands in a giant "Red Rover, Red Rover" game, everybody on the border, holding hands, just shouting out, "Red rover, red rover, don`t come over!"
(END VIDEO CLIP)
BECK: I was a little fired up earlier today.
Now, during the last election, I told people: Stop reading the polls. If you really want to know what some people think, find some way to find where people are actually putting their money where their mouth is.
I did find it. It`s on a Web site that accurately predicted Saddam Hussein`s capture, the winner of every state in the last presidential election, even Harriet Miers` withdrawing her Supreme Court nomination two days before she actually did, and it was announced on my program two days before.
How? By showing people that are buying stock in these things. It`s called TradeSports.com. It is absolute proof to me that, in this case, insider trading works to your advantage.
Mike Knesevitch is with us now. Hi, Mike, how are you, sir?
MIKE KNESEVITCH, TRADESPORTS.COM: I`m good, Glenn.
BECK: Good. You`ve been on the radio program a million times. This is the first time I`ve actually seen you.
KNESEVITCH: Absolutely, I know.
BECK: So let`s start here. Let`s look at the things that are up on the big board, if you will. "American Idol," you got season two right, season three right.
KNESEVITCH: Correct.
BECK: Is it going to be Taylor?
KNESEVITCH: Fifty-seven percent probability it is Taylor.
BECK: Now, that`s not -- you tell me, isn`t it like 65 percent and then you say it`s a lock?
KNESEVITCH: Well, it`s about -- yes, you know, but remember Bo Bice was trading at 65 in "American Idol" 4, and we got that one wrong, but we do get -- out of our more than 2,000 different contracts that we trade, we have an incredible history of accuracy of these things.
BECK: Movies, "Da Vinci Code." I know the church is coming after it and saying, you know, "Don`t go see it, don`t go see it." It`s going to kill at the box office, but how high big is it going to be?
KNESEVITCH: Well, the over-under is $60 million, and we`re say it`s going to go way above that. The likelihood is first weekend, you know, you`re talking "Lord of the Rings" numbers, $100 million-plus.
BECK: Yes, you know what? It`s the first movie in a long time that I really want to see. It`s got Tom Hanks. You know, it`s a good action flick. It doesn`t have any real bad buzz on it, you know, except for the whole, you know, "Jesus really didn`t exist" kind of thing, you know, except for that.
Moving on to politics, Al Gore -- ugh -- is he going to be running again?
KNESEVITCH: Well, he is going to be running again. And the good news for you is that the Hillary Clinton contract sold off a little bit recently.
BECK: Really?
KNESEVITCH: And the interesting thing in politics is the Al Gore contract doubled in the last two weeks.
BECK: What, that he`s going to run or that he could win?
KNESEVITCH: That he`s going to be the Democratic nominee.
BECK: Shut up!
KNESEVITCH: Yes. Yes.
BECK: There`s no way that guy is going to be the...
KNESEVITCH: When you want to know what the world thinks on politics, Glenn, you got to go to TradeSports.
BECK: I will tell you, Mike -- DARPA is, you know, the people that are -- our government think tank. They`re the people that came up with the Internet and everything else. They came up with an idea where to predict and how to predict where the next terrorist activity would come from. They came up with, basically, TradeSports. They said, "Let`s trade information. Let`s have people buy stock on where it was."
KNESEVITCH: Absolutely.
BECK: It was deemed too crazy. You`re doing it all the time.
KNESEVITCH: We`re doing it very well. You know, we have over 65,000 members around the world trading these things. Can you imagine -- you`re going to be able to trade Taylor Hicks while he`s singing.
BECK: Let me just hit you with a couple here quickly. Bird flu, ever going to hit the U.S.?
KNESEVITCH: You know, the interesting thing about it was, three months ago, it was trading at 65, meaning a 65 percent probability that it would.
BECK: Right.
KNESEVITCH: It`s now down to about 30.
BECK: Yes, I feel the same thing, really, and I`m not paranoid about it. Iran air strikes, yes or no?
KNESEVITCH: Fifteen percent probability by year end. I think that`s incredibly high.
BECK: OK. You have anything on the GLENN BECK TV show?
KNESEVITCH: You know, we`re buyers.
BECK: Are you, you`re buyers? Right, let me see the screen. Let me see the screen. What are people actually doing? Do we have it? OK.
KNESEVITCH: There you go.
BECK: I don`t think that`s really that good. Mike, thanks a lot. I appreciate it.
KNESEVITCH: You`re welcome, Glenn.
BECK: OK. Let`s go "Straight to the Hill" now. Erica Hill, she is the anchor of "PRIME NEWS" on Headline News.
It`s your second week on the air, as well, all by your lonesome.
ERICA HILL, CNN HEADLINE NEWS ANCHOR: Yes, I lost my TV hubby. He moved to the mornings.
BECK: I know. Did you -- is this the first time you`ve ever done it all by yourself?
HILL: No, I did some all by myself when I was in California at Tech TV.
BECK: How much does it kill you that you, like, actually have worked at your career and then you`re followed by me?
HILL: And then some joker like Glenn Beck comes in and gets his own show? What?
BECK: I know. Life is just not fair. All right. What`s happening with the news?
HILL: All right, this one -- I`ve heard through the grapevine that you think maybe it`s time for the penny to bow out of circulation.
BECK: Yes. I think that when it costs us 1.4 cents to make a one- cent coin, yes, I think so.
HILL: Maybe it`s not worth it.
BECK: Yes.
HILL: Well, you may have some other people jumping on that wagon with you, including one woman in Michigan. She actually had her power turned off because she was a penny short on her bill.
BECK: That`s right!
HILL: A penny.
BECK: Another scuttle of coal, Mr. Cratchit.
HILL: She went to the office. She paid with a penny, got a receipt. The power came back on. It had been out for a total of seven hours.
Now, a spokesman for the energy company said they really had no choice here, but he hadn`t actually heard of stopping service for a penny before.
BECK: Sure. Well, they have no choice, all right?
HILL: They did point out -- to be fair here, they did point out that they do offer some services to help people if they`re having trouble paying their bills.
BECK: Right. I don`t know if that one would count.
HILL: OK. Some good news for New England tonight -- and they need it -- the rain winding down, according to the National Weather Service. That, of course, is after five straight days of rain which have led to the worst flooding in nearly 70 years in some areas. Between Boston and the New Hampshire state line -- get this -- the National Weather Service estimating between 12 to 17 inches fell in just three days.
BECK: Amazing. Amazing.
HILL: It`s insane.
BECK: I mean, I`ve got to tell you, there`s no place to live where you can get away from Mother Nature.
HILL: You can`t escape it.
BECK: I swear to you, I want to live on Mars, and a lot of people would probably help send me there. I want to live, like, on Mars with a dome and to keep it perfectly air-conditioned, like, 75 degrees year round.
HILL: You can just go to the Biosphere. Where was that, Arizona or something? Remember years ago, the Biosphere?
BECK: I`m OK with that. I really am OK with that.
HILL: OK, so there we go. We`ll just address your fan mail to Glenn Beck, Biosphere.
BECK: OK, good.
HILL: Meantime in Florida, which gets hit with a lot of weather every year, right, right now the focus is on alligators. Gator hunting season there being extended to help thin out the alligator population. As you know, three deaths in less than a week blamed on gator attacks there.
BECK: Wait. Wait, there`s a time when it`s not OK to hunt alligators?
HILL: Well, hey, here`s the thing. Wildlife officials, we should point out, had already expanded the number of gators that each hunter is allowed to kill during hunting season before these attacks because of a growing population, but there`s a lot of talk, too, that humans might be getting a little too comfortable with alligators, so officials are reminding...
(CROSSTALK)
BECK: Yes. No, I lived in Florida...
HILL: ... them to keep their distance, don`t feed them.
BECK: Yes, I know. I lived in Florida for a while. There`s actually people that, like, you know, feed them chicken.
HILL: Oh, yes.
BECK: And I`m thinking: You deserve to be eaten. You do. You really do.
HILL: Yes.
BECK: But let me ask you this: What is the purpose of an alligator? And I think God designed that thing incorrectly. I mean, it`s got little, teeny short legs. You can outrun it by running in zigzags.
HILL: No, you can`t. No, you can`t.
BECK: In zigzags, you can.
HILL: No, you cannot. I talked to Tim Williams from Gatorland yesterday on our show...
BECK: Yes?
HILL: ... they actually can go up -- I think they can go up to 30 miles an hour almost. They can lunge like five feet, and they can get you if you go zigzag.
BECK: Holy cow. It`s a good thing I was never eaten. Thanks.
HILL: See you tomorrow.
(COMMERCIAL BREAK)
BECK: Do you need guidance in your life? Forget about your therapist. Forget about your personal trainer. Forget Kabbalah. Today what you need is a life coach.
A trade group called -- and I`m not making this up -- the International Coach Federation says that nearly 10,000 people today pay coaches to guide them through their personal and business lives. Uh-huh. It`s one of the fastest growing professions in America.
So that got me thinking. I mean, maybe I could find myself one of these life coaches and take her for a test drive.
(BEGIN VIDEOTAPE)
BECK (voice-over): For my initial consultation, my life coach, Penelope Brackett, suggested I set aside 30 minutes out of my busy schedule so she could have my undivided attention. Oh, Penelope, just 30 minutes? No problem.
Just for the love of Pete, do what you know is right.
ANNOUNCER: This is the GLENN BECK program.
PENELOPE BRACKETT, LIFE COACH: What`s the impact of the show? What do you want this -- let`s start with a TV show, since that`s -- we don`t have a lot of time, and that`s the one coming up. How is that impact different from what you`re doing here on radio?
BECK (on camera): OK, hang on, I`ve got to take -- I`ve got to answer that in a second.
Let`s go to Matt. Hello, Matt. You`re on the GLENN BECK program. However, everybody else seems to be, and they said, "Is it true?" We can get set up so they can come right in.
OK, where were we?
BRACKETT: We were talking about making decisions in some of the sort of structure, the foundation to help you make decisions. And one of the things that we talked about was a purpose statement.
BECK: OK, good. Can we -- I`ve got to break, and we`ll do it again here in just a few minutes. OK, thanks.
I want to know what`s going to happen to the -- I`m interested to see now -- 888-727-BECK.
ANNOUNCER: This is the GLENN BECK program.
BRACKETT: Are you feeling good? I heard you`re not feeling.
BECK: Yes. No, I`m feeling sick and, you know...
BRACKETT: It`s amazing. You`re doing really well.
BECK: Thanks.
BRACKETT: How did you do that?
(CROSSTALK)
BECK (voice-over): Luckily for me, Penelope has written a book, a short book, 111 pages, which I might someday have time to look at if it`s ever turned into a movie.
BRACKETT: I would say one of the major keys to success is the first one, is the first key that I have in the book, and that is to declare a goal.
BECK (on camera): Superstar?
BRACKETT: Superstar, if that`s what you would like to be, that`s an outcome you want.
BECK: Sure.
BRACKETT: Everybody needs work. You know, most clients, I talk to them a half-hour a week. I could definitely -- I mean, definitely think (INAUDIBLE)
BECK: When we adopted my Raphe, my son, you know, it was, you know, a big deal for having three, kind of getting used to the three, and now we have four. And, you know, and I don`t know -- it might be too late for me to return him.
BRACKETT: Yes, yes, probably. Many, many people I believe can have their dreams if they`re really willing to go for them.
BECK: The ideal work thing would be for me to come to the office ever 10 days, pick up a check, and go home.
BRACKETT: Any business is about relationships, but life is also about relationships.
BECK: We got a lot of people that are working, and, you know, right now are kind of...
(CROSSTALK)
BRACKETT: ... who has your voice.
BECK: Yes. You know, we`re kind of...
BRACKETT: Looking.
BECK: Yes. We`ve hired them, but they`re not going to be around.
BRACKETT: Right. You`re helping them visualize what it is they want and move toward it.
BECK: I`m thinking about taking up racquetball.
BRACKETT: If somebody says a question that`s just out there, I go, "Come on." I never know. You know that`s not a question that`s important to you.
BECK: I was thinking about growing a beard. And then people are like, "No, don`t grow a beard." Other people are like, "Yes, grow a beard." You know, and I don`t know.
BRACKETT: Whether you want to grow a beard?
BECK: Yes.
BRACKETT: I have to be aware not to hurt people`s feelings.
BECK: What about mutton chops?
BRACKETT: Does coaching enable a narcissist? You know what? I actually find that I help people to be free to use their strengths and gifts to make an impact in the world.
BECK: Do you think this microphone makes me look fat?
BRACKETT: Do I think that picture makes you look fat? No, it`s got nothing to do with you.
BECK: Is it my fat that makes me look fat?
I have like five more minutes. Can we just walk and talk?
BRACKETT: Good. Excellent. Absolutely, I`d love to do that.
BECK: How do you make a decision or do you have to know the answer like...
BRACKETT: I think you have to decide.
BECK: The issues that we talk about every day are these huge issues, and, you know, there are times like -- I mean, for an example, illegal immigration. If you were working for me, I could call up and just say, "Illegal immigration, should I be for it or against it?"
BRACKETT: I`m not going to be your political adviser, no.
BECK: Good to see you. Bye-bye. Thanks.
BRACKETT: Yes, bye-bye. Take care.
BECK: Should I get the lobster bisque or the clam chowder?
BRACKETT: Trust yourself.
BECK: So the chowder?
BRACKETT: It sounds like that`s what you want.
BECK: Or the lobster?
(END VIDEOTAPE)
BECK: OK. I mean, clearly I`m a guy who needs help, mainly on what tie to even wear. And, by the way, thank you so much for all of the feedback on my wardrobe. No, no, it was great, and this didn`t come from Filene`s Basement. TJ Maxx.
Anyway, after spending the morning with Penelope over at the radio show, I wanted to ask her just a few more questions about the whole life coach thing.
(BEGIN VIDEOTAPE)
BECK: You were a good sport. Let me ask you, I mean, because, honestly, you hear "life coach," and you`re like, "Come on, who does this?"
BRACKETT: So you`re asking...
BECK: Really, I mean, who does this?
BRACKETT: Well, anybody who feels like there`s a gap between what they want and where they are right now.
BECK: So who are you -- I mean, what hole are you filling? Because you`re not a psychotherapist. And you`re not -- you know, I mean, who are you filling? Who`s looking for you?
BRACKETT: Well, as I said, I think if people want to get somewhere, it`s not -- what a therapist does is really look at what`s happened in the past and try to make people bring them into the future.
BECK: Right.
BRACKETT: What we`re doing is we`re taking exactly where you are, we`re saying, "What do you want?" And right now in this country, we`re lucky enough not to be only considered with -- concerned with our survival, so we can really think about our choices, we can really think about, what do we want?
So I can help people to look at, this is what I want. What are some strategies to get me there? What are some ways to motivate myself to move forward?
BECK: So, like, what`s the craziest thing anybody has ever asked you?
BRACKETT: What they wanted for lunch?
BECK: Really?
BRACKETT: Yes, yes.
BECK: That wasn`t me, was it?
BRACKETT: Yes, yes.
BECK: Yes, but, like, have you ever thought to yourself -- I mean, you wouldn`t say this out loud, but you`ve thought to yourself, "Oh, I mean, grow a set, man, make a decision yourself"?
BRACKETT: No, I haven`t, really.
BECK: Never?
BRACKETT: No, I think that...
BECK: You`ve never thought -- nobody`s ever asked you, and you thought, "Oh"...
BRACKETT: OK, I just had the lunch question that, you know, I thought, you know, or "Is this microphone making my fat?"
BECK: I wasn`t the first one to ask you that. Yes, I wasn`t the first one. How long have you doing this?
BRACKETT: Fifteen years.
BECK: Holy cow. And this is like -- I mean, you must have been a pioneer at the time.
BRACKETT: Well, actually, you know, I was at the very beginning of coaching. It really got to be a clear profession around 15 years ago, with Thomas Leonard, who was the founder of Coach University, an international organization for coaches, and I was right at the beginning of that.
BECK: Let me ask you this. I`m getting a lot of heat. Just named my daughter Cheyenne. Mistake?
BRACKETT: Do you think so?
BECK: No, I like it. Of course, my first choice actually was Prairie.
BRACKETT: You know, I`ll tell you a story. I named my oldest Kazdem, K-A-Z-D-E-M.
BECK: Really?
BRACKETT: And my mother, as we`re leaving the hospital, says to my husband, "Please, try to convince her. He`s going to be saddled with this horrible name."
BECK: Yes, well, let me ask -- and I don`t mean to be rude here, but I don`t see you as a Penelope?
BRACKETT: You don`t?
BECK: No, I see you more as a Margaret.
BRACKETT: A Margaret.
BECK: Just try it. Just try it for a while, live with it, see what happens. My advice to you.
BRACKETT: All right.
(END VIDEOTAPE)
BECK: I want you to know hate is wrong, unless, of course, you exploit it for entertainment. Then everything`s OK.
Here`s the first piece of hate. "Glenn Beck`s show is on Headline News and it`s akin to eating circus peanuts. Tastes horrible, and it`s not good for you, either. Twinkies would be better. Signed, Mr. T."
Oh, thanks Mr. T. By the way, loved you in "Rocky 3." And Mr. T cereal was pretty good, kind of like Captain Crunch, except in a "t" shape. Clever.
But on a serious note, let me tell you something about circus peanuts. Plain and simple, underrated. I love them. They`ve been around since the 1800s, and they will outlive both of us, my friend, and I`m not talking about the invention. I mean the actual circus peanuts that were produced in the 1800s. They`re still being sold in bags today. They`ll never go bad, and I love their stale chewyness.
So to equate this show to circus peanuts, I mean, I take that as a welcome compliment. Honestly, I think you`re probably overselling the show just a little bit. But, hey, whatever.
Pat sends one of the most disturbing and flattering e-mails I think I`ve ever received. He writes, "Wow! Not only is he offensive to listen to, he`s offensive to watch, also. He came out with a pair of jeans on. It looked like he had a sock stuck in his pants. Signed, Pat."
Pat, I really don`t even know how to respond to that, so let`s move on.
"Hey, Glenn. You want to build a fence? What scientific proof do you have that a fence would work? Stan, Houston."
Well, Stan, I think a big fence is just part of the solution. Actually taking the problem seriously would be a nice little addition to the equation, as well.
But you intrigued me, my friend, when you asked what scientific proof I had that a fence would work. Honestly, zip. So I gathered all of our scientific minds on staff, and we did what us scientists do. We answer questions.
Stan, here is our scientific proof that fences do work. Oh, yes. Oh, yes, boom! Looks like it worked to me. Thanks to the Philadelphia Phillies and Aaron Rowand for helping us inject a little science into this debate.
By the way, you can send your hate mail to glennbeck@CNN.com. That`s two N`s in Glenn and two N in CNN. And you can make sure that you write me, too, if you like me. I`ll go ahead and take that, sure. I`m open.
See you tomorrow, you sick, twisted freak. Bye-bye.
END
