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Glenn Beck
Encore Presentation: Priest Weighs in "Da Vinci" Controversy; Critics Giving "Da Vinci Code" Mixed Reviews; Albinos Angry Over "Da Vinci Code" Depiction; Sampling the Latest Technology
Aired May 29, 2006 - 19:00 ET
THIS IS A RUSH TRANSCRIPT. THIS COPY MAY NOT BE IN ITS FINAL FORM AND MAY BE UPDATED.
GLENN BECK, HOST: You don`t need me to tell you this weekend there`s a huge Hollywood blockbuster opening. You know what I`m talking about: "Oh, we should boycott it. It`s horrible." Controversy is brewing. Me, I`ve waited for a long time. I`m seeing this movie.
Hi. One for "Over the Hedge," please.
It was a good experience, too.
That other movie, "The Da Vinci Code", opens today under a cloud of controversy. It`s got, frankly, more disturbing bad reviews. Some people are saying the movie` is sacrilegious. Let me tell you something. I haven`t seen it yet, but if I get a sitter tonight, I take away my precious time with my kids, I plop down money to see this movie and it sucks? That, my friend, is sacrilegious.
Now, for the eight people here in the country that haven`t read the book, "The Da Vinci Code" raises questions about the origins of Jesus, and even suggests that he may have been married. No! And I didn`t even get him a gift. Because of this, some religious leaders are calling for a boycott of the film.
You know, what`s wrong with asking questions? It`s a freaking movie, man. I ask questions all the time, questions like, how many marshmallows will fit in my mouth before I suffocate? Answer, 12.
The great philosopher, Francis Bacon, who obviously, I always assumed was the inventor of Bacon, said that "sin is in not asking the question." or something like that. Honestly, I don`t even know if that was him; I`m just trying to sound smart here.
The point is, a few hundred years ago, people were afraid to even ask questions. I`d like to think that things have changed today, but maybe they haven`t. Everywhere, free thought is being suppressed, from college campuses to Capitol Hill. Scientists don`t want to ask religious questions; religious people don`t want to ask scientific questions. Please, can we just knock it off? Can`t we celebrate honest questioning?
Let me go see the movie, you know? I`ll go see whatever movie I want and I`ll come to my own conclusions. It`s "The Da Vinci Code." It may be a crappy movie, but I`m pretty sure, it`s not an evil one.
Father Tim Mulligan is here at Syracuse University. Father, are you going to see the movie tonight?
FATHER TIM MULLIGAN: Well, actually, Glenn, to tell you the truth, I`m not sure. I`ve read the book. And oftentimes if I really like a book, I`m not sure if I see the movie. But it really has raised a lot of stir.
BECK: I`ve got to tell you, I am not a Catholic, but I read "The Da Vinci Code." And I thought it was OK. It was disturbing to me on a couple of fronts. But one of the things, not being Catholic, I thought a Catholic would be offended by some of the things in it.
MULLIGAN: Glenn, the first thing we have to remember is that it`s fiction. This is a piece of fiction.
BECK: Right.
MULLIGAN: Now, over and above that, you know, it`s certainly meant for entertainment value. I think, you know, it`s got some historical pieces to it, but not, you know, for Catholics.
BECK: Father, let me ask you this.
MULLIGAN: Sorry.
BECK: I asked this on the radio show earlier this week. And I really don`t understand this, especially coming from conservatives. We stand behind marriage. We think marriage is sacred, et cetera, et cetera.
And so many people, and I`m not saying there is no historical fact or evidence that shows that Jesus was married, but that`s one of the premises that has people up in arms. What would be so horrible? Would it change Jesus` divinity to think that he was married?
MULLIGAN: Well, I think you`re getting at a good point, Glenn. What "The Da Vinci Code" and even "The Last Temptation of Christ" and even Mel Gibson`s "The Passion" really, really asks viewers to look at is what does it mean that Jesus was human? I think that that`s part of our faith as Christians, fully human and fully divine.
And I think that that`s something that the viewer really is troubled with oftentimes. What does it mean that Christ was human?
BECK: Right. That`s what I -- that`s what I liked about "The Last Temptation of Christ" was at the end when he`s hanging on the cross, he had a moment where he was tempted. And said, look, just get down, and you can have a family, you can have a real life.
It means more that he was tempted and he chose, "I`m not going to -- I`m not going to do that. I`m going to do what I was sent here to do." That`s -- that`s one of the lessons we`re supposed to get from him, isn`t it?
MULLIGAN: It is. And you know, I even think of the letter to the Hebrews, where it says that, you know, Christ experienced everything we experienced but sin. And I think since the early times of the church, unpacking that, what it means that Christ was fully human, has just been something that`s made people really wriggle in their seats a little bit.
BECK: Yes, I think we`re self-hating egomaniacs in many ways.
You know, one of the things that also confuses me is people are saying, "Oh, this is a horrible movie. It`s going to destroy Christianity or really hurt." First of all, how weak of a Christian are you if a Tom Hanks movie can destroy your faith?
Really, it`s seems to me that people who don`t have enough faith don`t really know what they believe in that could have their faith rocked by this movie.
But for those who do, isn`t this exactly what you`re looking for? I mean, you`re always looking for a way to talk about the lord at the office. Well, this is it, isn`t it?
MULLIGAN: Yes. You know, myself being on the university, one of the things it`s allowed me to do is to be in dialogue with some students who have come and had questions. But it`s given great rise to some opportunities to -- for them to ask those questions, those important questions.
You know, that was a nice quote that you gave before by Francis Bacon, a Franciscan. And you know, asking the questions are so important. And if we`re ever to grow in faith, we have to ask the questions and then find the reasonable answers.
BECK: You`re exactly right. Father, thank you so much. Appreciate it. Have a great weekend.
MULLIGAN: Thank you.
BECK: You bet.
You know, actually, Rebecca is on the staff. She said to me earlier, she`s Jewish. And she said it`s nice as a Jew to come see this movie, because it`s the first time that the Jews weren`t the bad guys at a Christian movie. Yes, it was the albinos.
Listen, I love to go see movies. I haven`t seen one in a couple of months. I -- my wife and I have been talking about this one coming out for months. We`ve saved the night. And I`ve got to tell you, if it stinks and I go to see it, I`m going to be really hacked off.
Christy Lemire, she`s a movie critic from the Associated Press, who by the way, she`s not French.
CHRISTY LEMIRE, MOVIE CRITIC, ASSOCIATED PRESS: Imagine that!
BECK: We can listen to her. Sacre bleu.
"Da Vinci Code," should I see it? I haven`t seen one in awhile. I really want to see it. How bad is it?
LEMIRE: It`s not awful and it`s not great. I think it`s disappointing, and yet you should go see it because it is a cultural phenomenon. I think you should want to be able to go talk about it on Monday.
BECK: This why -- you know, I hate that. I hate the thought, "It`s a cultural phenomenon."
LEMIRE: It is.
BECK: I hate the idea. By the way, may I just -- I`m sorry, I`m riddled with ADD. It may be that you just were -- you know, you just followed a priest, but I mean, what`s with the Catholic schoolgirl outfit there? Don`t get me wrong. It`s working for me.
LEMIRE: No, I`m the preppy film critic.
BECK: Is that what it is?
LEMIRE: Give me a set of pearls and call me Muffy, you know.
BECK: All right.
LEMIRE: To look demure and respectable here.
BECK: OK.
LEMIRE: No, I think just -- everyone could be talking about this. Sixty million copies of this book were sold. Don`t you want to be able to take part in that conversation?
BECK: Not really. I just want to go see a good movie, you know. That`s what I hate about Hollywood. Stop with the message films. Just -- if you want a film, great, call Kodak. I want a movie. You know? Just let me have a good time to escape. Will it provide that?
LEMIRE: Well, it`s beautifully shot.
BECK: Oh, the kiss of death!
LEMIRE: No, no!
BECK: Bye-bye!
LEMIRE: The cinematography is sublime. And Paul Bettany is great in it, speaking of the albino that has everybody angry. He`s probably the best thing in it in that he`s scary and yet he makes us feel sorry for him at the same time, which is sort of a hard feat to pull off.
BECK: Right.
LEMIRE: Ian McKellen, who could literally go on a sound stage and read the Bible from cover to cover, and I`d pay 10 bucks to see that, he is great in it, as the grail expert historian. So there is some good stuff in it.
And yet, it`s two and a half hours long. They`re trying to cram too much of the book into the film, and that`s a real problem.
BECK: Right. I mean, I tried to get tickets today. From 66th to 38th, you cannot get a ticket until 13:30 tonight here in New York.
LEMIRE: And it`s midnight. You`re getting home at 3 in the morning.
BECK: Is it worth seeing a movie on a Friday or a Saturday night? Is it good enough to be able to sit there and put up with the shot-nosed teenager who`s talking on the phone halfway through the movie? Is it at least that good?
LEMIRE: Maybe go early on a Sunday. Can you go to a matinee on a Sunday perhaps?
BECK: Well, no, but I could maybe on a Saturday. Thanks a lot. Christy, I appreciate it.
By the way, we`ve just appointed you, yes, our Friday movie chick.
LEMIRE: Da da da da!
BECK: Thank you very much. See you next week.
LEMIRE: Thanks.
BECK: Bye-bye. Whatever anybody says, I`m still looking forward to seeing "The Da Vinci Code." I think I`m going to roll the dice. And I`m also kind of looking forward -- it`s kind of what Christy said -- I`m looking forward to seeing if any freaks that are going to come out and protest it. I do find it hard to believe that a piece of fiction has so many people up in arms. But that`s America.
(BEGIN VIDEOTAPE)
BECK (voice-over): Meet Brooke Fox, one pissed off albino.
BROOKE FOX, WOMAN WITH ALBINISM: This "Da Vinci Code" thing it`s, like, the 67th character since 1960 to be depicted as such, an evil albino.
BECK: Actually, Brooke, it`s No. 73, by you know, who`s counting?
Albinos like Fox want you to know that they`re real and they`re here.
FOX: We want people to know that we`re real, that we`re here and we`re not serial killers.
BECK: Wait a minute, who said anything about serial killers? Hmm, but now that you brought it up, I mean, if I were to make a great slasher film, a really good one, what creepy characteristics would I need for the ideal villain?
FOX: There`s the red eyes, the pale skin, often supernatural powers, which could include shooting laser beams or lightning bolts from eyes.
BECK: OK, just remember, you said it, not me.
You know what kills me? Is people obviously don`t really believe albinos are evil. Everybody`s just getting so sensitive on anything. What albinos need to do is sit back, relax, enjoy a good movie. Watch your peers in such great films like "Powder." OK, now that I`m looking at it, that wasn`t really a good film.
There was "The Omega Man".
UNIDENTIFIED MALE: Does he have a good family?
UNIDENTIFIED MALE: No.
BECK: Yes, that one kind of seems dated, too. "Time Machine"? Wow, what a piece of crap.
Even "The Da Vinci Code" is getting ripped apart by critics. You know, actually, let me rephrase. What albinos really need to do is stop complaining and start making better albino movies. Like the new blockbuster albino flick from fledgling albino filmmaker Dennis Hurley, who by the way, happens to be an albino.
DENNIS HURLEY, FILMMAKER: Dan Brown doesn`t know jack about albinos.
UNIDENTIFIED MALE: Hey, go back to Albania, whole milk.
BECK: Hurley thinks someone named Brown shouldn`t really be writing about something so white.
HURLEY: My main problem is that he`s using an albino character to induce fear in the audience.
BECK: Point well taken.
So what is the message that we should take from Albinoville?
FOX: We just want people to know who we are. We just want people to know that we`re here and that we`re not going to shoot them with laser beams out of our eyes while we`re walking down the street.
BECK: I guess albinos just want to be judged by the content of their character and not by the color of their skin, or lack thereof.
(END VIDEOTAPE)
BECK: Just saying. So you know, albinos don`t want you to boycott the movie. They want to educate you, so don`t worry. And remember, next time you see an albino, just know they`re not entirely evil. And it`s highly unlikely -- OK, all right somewhat unlikely, that they`re going to try to kill you in your sleep tonight. Most unlikely. Pretty unlikely. I mean...
(COMMERCIAL BREAK)
(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)
BECK: Never said you didn`t have the right to boycott. I just don`t think it`s the right course of action.
Think of it from the other side. Mel Gibson started talking about "The Passion of Christ". Most media sources tried to paint him as a freak. You remember that? Comedians made fun of him. Now Mel has a few extra hundred million in the bank and enough credibility to make a movie about ancient Mayans or Aztecs or I don`t know what he`s doing down there. I know it`s in a different language.
This movie has a built-in fan base. And the -- the only star in the entire world that you wouldn`t believe ate his kids` placenta.
(END VIDEO CLIP)
BECK: Last week "The Public Viewer" was a segment that I dreaded. Brian Sack, who`s supposedly independent from the show, brings in all the viewer feedback and critiques from the previous week. This week I`m kind of looking forward to it.
Brian...
BRIAN SACK, "THE PUBLIC VIEWER": Yes.
BECK: ... we have improved a lot this week, have we not?
SACK: I`ve heard you have. People said you did.
BECK: You`re not even watching the show?
SACK: I`m watching the show. I TiVo you every night.
BECK: And you`ve seen those. You`ve watched it.
SACK: I`ve seen you more than anybody else, I think.
BECK: Really? OK.
SACK: And can I move -- I want to move on. I`ve got a lot to talk about.
BECK: OK, go ahead.
SACK: The viewers have had about two weeks to get used to your show. And they have some ideas as far as what the title should be, other than "The Glenn Beck Show".
BECK: OK.
SACK: The first would be "I Really Like `24` with Glenn Beck".
BECK: Right. I did notice that pattern there.
SACK: There is a pattern there. There`s another pattern here, and that would be "The Illegal Immigrant and `American Idol` Show".
And finally, the "Guess Which Political Ideology I Chose Today Show."
BECK: What`s that mean?
SACK: You`re not committing. You`ve not committing.
BECK: I`m totally committed.
SACK: I love this, and I love this.
BECK: I`m a conservative that doesn`t happen to be a Republican.
SACK: OK, so you`re not going to tow a particular party line.
BECK: That`s exactly right.
SACK: OK, now America knows. Moving on, this is something we didn`t get to. Ironically, I had to sign off last week before we got to it. Can we roll the tape on this?
(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)
BECK: That`s it for tonight. Enjoy the rest of your evening. Don`t catch the bird flu. Seacrest out.
See you tomorrow, you sick freak.
We`ll see you then. Bye-bye.
I`m Glenn Beck, see you tomorrow.
That`s it. We`ll see you tomorrow, you sick, twisted freak.
See you tomorrow, you sick, twisted freak.
(END VIDEO CLIP)
BECK: I don`t understand the problem.
SACK: There`s not a lot of consistency here. First, you`re stealing Ryan Seacrest`s signoff. At one point, you make a monster face. And then the other times, you know, you`re calling your fans sick, twisted freaks.
BECK: If you listened to the show, Brian, the radio show, you would know that would be a term of endearment.
SACK: Really?
BECK: Not in your case, you freak.
SACK: I sold my car to move to New York.
Moving on, OK. Let`s roll the tape on this before...
(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)
BECK: And then you should put it into perspective. Did you see "The Money Pit"? Did that harm your view of homeownership?
(END VIDEO CLIP)
SACK: Look at that. When you come up with an analogy, as good as it may be, never, ever make that face again.
BECK: What?
SACK: Did you see that face?
BECK: What was wrong with that face?
SACK: It was an "I`m so incredibly proud of myself" face.
BECK: I know -- I know that it was an ugly face, but America, get used to it. You`ve going to be able to see this face every night.
SACK: All right. And we heard you ever night. We`re going to move on.
Let`s see. The Ted Bell interview.
BECK: Yes.
SACK: OK. We`re going to see -- let`s look at some footage of the Ted Bell interview here. And I just had a question here. That is, what is Ted Bell looking at? What`s to the left that Ted Bell just keeps looking over at?
BECK: I know Ted Bell. He`s never actually ever looking at anything at the left?
SACK: OK. Well, there`s something over there that`s really got his attention. And I want to know if you have any ideas what it would be.
BECK: I believe -- can you put that back on the screen for a second? Because let me see if I recognize this, because he was in Palm Beach.
SACK: There`s the answer. He`s watching "Hardball" with Chris Matthews. OK, moving onward.
The Monday opening, we had little -- you had a Bush impersonator, did we not?
BECK: Come on. Come on.
SACK: Let`s see this.
BECK: No. Let`s not see this.
SACK: Let`s watch this.
(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)
BECK: Here`s what the president should say.
UNIDENTIFIED MALE: I love immigrants. But I also love rules.
SACK: Is that Nick Nolte?
BECK: Here`s what the president should say.
UNIDENTIFIED MALE: I`m going to build a super fence with lasers because lasers are cool.
(END VIDEO CLIP)
SACK: You know, they have guilds with actors in them. You can hire people who do that for a living.
BECK: It was embarrassing. I apologize.
SACK: OK, woo! Moving on. You know, CNN hired you. They want to bring in a younger audience, obviously. They want to add to their demographic, bring in the 18- to 30-somethings.
BECK: Sure.
SACK: And you`re not going to do it when you say stuff like this.
(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)
BECK: But other times, there is nothing more beautiful than making love to your wife.
(END VIDEO CLIP)
SACK: Did you hear that? That`s the sound of 100,000 TVs turning off.
BECK: I just talked about hot sex.
SACK: You know, it`s been great. Thank you very much. I am PublicViewer@GlennBeck.com. If you have any more comments on the show. Glenn, thanks for working with me.
BECK: Seacrest out, you sick freak.
(COMMERCIAL BREAK)
BECK: All right, so some kid in Los Angeles loads his class notes into a handheld e-mail device and then uses them to cheat during a test. Woo.
And over at San Jose State University, some journalism students -- and I thought we could always trust journalists -- were using spell-check on their laptops during a spelling test.
I mean, let me ask you a question. Whatever happened to the good old days, when you wrote the answers on your arm or you took the time to copy off the smart kid sitting next to you? Technology is ruining us. I mean, what ever happened to the good old fashioned cheating days?
Let`s talk to David Pogue. He`s from "The New York Times". He`s a technology -- hello, David.
DAVID POGUE, "NEW YORK TIMES": Sorry, sorry.
BECK: Are you picking up NSA transmissions there?
POGUE: You know what it is?
BECK: Yes.
POGUE: It`s CNN Headline News. They have a satellite radio station. Is that cool?
BECK: Holy cow.
POGUE: You heard of that network?
BECK: Yes, I have heard about that network.
David, my daughter is going into college, and, you know, I`ve got to equip her with everything that she needs. What does she need? Do you have, like, the newest, smallest "I`m going to drop it and destroy it or it will be stolen so it`s got to be cheap" laptop?
POGUE: Do I ever, man? I`m like a walking Circuit City right here. This is it. First one hot off the press is the stealth laptop. This is Apple`s new lap book. It`s a beauty, jet black and $1,100 bucks. It`s ideal for people going to -- how about that, the video camera built right into the top. You need all this fancy equipment.
BECK: Wait a minute. So she could -- if she ever would call me, you know.
POGUE: Call you?
BECK: Hopefully it won`t be from jail. I can actually see her.
POGUE: Yes, you don`t have to call her. You can video chat with her. Get with the times.
BECK: I know, I know. I`m going to have to charge you for that "Times" reference there.
POGUE: OK.
BECK: What if I want to steal music?
POGUE: Stealing music? That...
BECK: I want the fastest, easiest way to steal music.
POGUE: You`ve got it right here. Check it out. Looks like an iPod. It is, brings in the mp3 files, just like an iPod. But this little puppy is an antenna. We`re talking satellite radio, XMs satellite radio, 120 stations. When you hear a song you like, you press this button, and you`ve just recorded that song for free. Straight to the device.
BECK: Whoa. Hold it just a second. I`m on XM Satellite Radio. I don`t believe you have permission from me to steal my program.
POGUE: Excuse me, I`m paying my 13 bucks a month. I can do whatever I like.
BECK: Really? Let me tell you something. You need serious psychological help if you`re stealing my program. If you`re "I`ve got to download this and save it", you`re freak.
POGUE: You`re a serious -- no, Sirius is the other.
BECK: That`s right.
POGUE: This is XM. I`ll be here till Thursday. Thank you.
BECK: Some more comedy from "The New York Times".
POGUE: But seriously, it is a little controversial, because the recording industry, that beloved station of record executives, are suing these puppies because they`re saying, wait, this amounts to stealing music.
BECK: You know what, it is true, though. It is true. I hate to defend anybody in Hollywood or the recording industry, but it`s true. I mean, that is...
POGUE: In what way is it true? I don`t get to pick what songs they air. And I`ve already paid for them. All I`m doing is time shifted. Didn`t you ever put a cassette in the stereo and record a show to listen to it later? How is it any different?
BECK: Well, no, I never did. OK.
POGUE: That explains a few things right there.
BECK: Right, OK. David, we`re out of time. David, thank you very much. I appreciate it. We`ll see you again.
POGUE: My pleasure. Bye-bye.
(COMMERCIAL BREAK)
(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)
BECK: Those who took this survey say they`d rather be blind than fat.
UNIDENTIFIED MALE: There`s a reason these people shouldn`t have children. I don`t understand. I mean, we`ve got to start having children licenses or something. If people like this can -- if they`re honestly answering this questionnaire that way, there is no reason these people should have children.
BECK: You know what? Let me tell you something: You`re exactly right. And that`s why -- I`ve said it for years. You have to have a license, you know, to use that body part. You should have a license. It should be regulated. It`s a dangerous, dangerous weapon, you know, in the wrong hands, Ms. Spears.
(END VIDEO CLIP)
BECK: That was earlier today on my radio show. It`s a Yale University study that show that people are willing to sacrifice just to stay thin. And I`ve got to tell you: Sacrifice will make your head explode when you hear what they`re talking about.
More than 4,000 people in sample size. Three out of 10 say they`d be willing to die 10 years earlier for a thinner waistline. A decade out of your life to look like Nicole Ritchie? I don`t think so.
Four percent said they`d rather go blind; 5 percent say they`d rather lose a limb than be fat. I mean, you could lose my spleen. I don`t think it does anything, but a limb?
And god forbid you ever become really, really fat. Something like one in five are willing to give up their marriage or have any chance of ever having kids. They`d rather be depressed or an alcoholic rather than be obese.
Now, let me tell you something: I`m a recovering alcoholic, and I`ve been doughy on and off my whole life. But given the choice of becoming a whale or a drunk and getting, you know, my wife and my four beautiful kids bye-bye, I think I`ll take Hurley from "Lost" as my role model any time.
Dr. Susan Bartell, she`s a psychologist with two daughters. She`s written a weight loss guide for girls.
Let me ask you something, Doctor, how is it we get our daughters to have a sandwich from time to time?
DR. SUSAN BARTELL, AUTHOR, "GIRLS-ONLY WEIGHT LOSS GUIDE": Well, Glenn, I`ve got to tell you, it`s really incredible, those statistics that you`re saying. And the way we do it is by modeling it, not by telling our kids that the most important thing they can do is be thin. That`s ridiculous.
BECK: What does this survey -- have you seen this survey?
BARTELL: I have, yes
BECK: What does this survey say about us as a people? I think it`s frightening.
BARTELL: It is frightening. It says that all we care about is how we look. It tells us that the media is brainwashing us to be thin. It tells us that the food companies are confusing us by serving us fast food all the time and then expecting us to look like models while we`re eating it.
BECK: I will tell you that, you know, when I first starting doing -- I mean, believe it or not, America, I`m actually 65 pounds. When I first started doing television, I`d bump into people in the hallway, and they`re frightening. They are so thin. They`re rail thin. It`s like Skeletor walking around the hallways. You see them on TV, and they`re normal- looking, which is thin, compared to, you know, what you see in real life. It`s unrealistic for people to look like this.
BARTELL: But that`s what our kids are seeing. That`s what they`re seeing every day in magazines. It`s what they`re seeing on television. We have to not allow those, you know, skinny-model cover magazines into our houses. We have to monitor the TV and the movies that they see. We cannot let our kids walk around feeling that the only way they can be happy is to be skinny.
BECK: But you know what? That`s what this survey does. I mean, you look at -- I was so offended by the people who answered in this survey they would rather have their child have a learning disability than to be fat. I would rather have my children raised by Susan Sarandon and Tim Robbins than by these freaks that are saying that.
BARTELL: Well, you`re absolutely right, but unfortunately those people were probably raised by people who made them feel that way. And so now they`re passing it down to their kids, and they have to stop the cycle. And you know what? The schools have to stop the cycle; the media has to take some responsibility for stopping the cycle. We cannot let it keep going.
BECK: How did we get here? Have you ever been to a museum?
BARTELL: Yes.
BECK: You go to a museum, you know, when you were dragged there, and you see these old paintings of these big, fat people hanging out on couches, and you`re, like, "Whoa! Slow down on the"...
BARTELL: And that was sexy back then, yes. Now, that`s the way we were supposed to look.
BECK: How did we flip? How did we go from thinking fat was cool? And can we ever get back, please?
BARTELL: Can we ever -- you know, I`m not sure that we want to get back to that, exactly.
BECK: Oh, yes, no, no, we do.
BARTELL: No, I don`t know that we want to get back to -- it`s OK to stuff your face and be as unhealthy as possible, and that`s OK, too.
BECK: No, I`m OK with that.
BARTELL: Well, I think that something in the middle would be good, as well. I think it would be OK to be...
BECK: Not so much.
BARTELL: Not so much?
BECK: Not for me. Everybody else. I want to be able to have my milkshakes. I`ve got one of the fat guys from "The Sopranos" coming up in just a second, and he says: Live your life, brother.
And, you know, on Monday`s show, we have supermodel Molly Simms, and I want to talk to her about this. What is your life like?
BARTELL: Well, her life must be, you know, one starvation diet to the next.
BECK: Oh, it has to be.
BARTELL: Oh, absolutely. Absolutely.
BECK: So how do we -- I`ve got three daughters now.
BARTELL: Oh, how old are your daughters?
BECK: I have an 18, 15 today -- happy birthday, Hannah -- 15 today, and two-week-old.
BARTELL: Oh, congratulations.
BECK: Yes. How do you raise your kids to be normal?
BARTELL: Well, the first and most important thing is for you and their mom not to talk about how much you hate your bodies in front of them, not to stand in front of the mirror and say, "Oh, look at this fat. Look at my thighs. I can`t wear these clothes anymore, because they look so awful," not to do that in front of your daughters.
BECK: OK, so I`ll do it -- I`ll close myself in the closet and just say...
BARTELL: Close yourself in the closet or the bathroom if you`re going to hate your body.
BECK: OK.
BARTELL: But under no circumstances do it in front of your kids. That`s the first thing.
BECK: OK.
BARTELL: You`ve got to make sure that you`ve got a lot of good, healthy food around, and that you don`t monitor what they eat, and that you don`t watch every bite they put in their mouth, and that it`s OK to eat some junk food, but you don`t them to live on junk food, because you want them to love their body.
You know, those people who are willing to give up a limb don`t love themselves very much. So they`ve got to love their body enough to take care of it, not to let it be super skinny, and not to let it get really fat.
BECK: Susan, I appreciate it. Thank you very much.
BARTELL: You`re welcome.
BECK: Best of luck.
All right. Let`s go "Straight to the Hill." Actually, I`m getting complaints from viewers. It`s not "Straight to the Hill," Glenn, it`s "straight to Hill."
ERICA HILL, CNN HEADLINE NEWS ANCHOR: Well, yes, that`s what the graphic says.
BECK: I know, but graphics shmaphics.
HILL: But, you know, I mean, it`s your show, so...
BECK: Yes. Erica Hill, anchor of "PRIME NEWS" on Headline News. How are you, Erica?
HILL: I`m doing well, yourself? It`s Friday.
BECK: It is. Are you going to see "The Da Vinci Code" this weekend?
HILL: Yes, I am.
BECK: Are you really?
HILL: I hope so.
BECK: Even with the really...
HILL: Well, it depends how long the line is.
BECK: Yes, really, even with the bad reviews, you`re still willing to go?
HILL: You know, I don`t usually go off movie reviews.
BECK: You don`t have kids, do you?
HILL: Well, it`s not really a movie for kids.
BECK: No, no, no, I`m saying you don`t have kids. See, when you -- I hate reviewers. I never have gone off reviews. Until you have kids, now it`s like such a big deal. I`ve got two hours I can get away and see something. I need -- it`s like an insurance policy, you know? Help me know which movie I could go to.
HILL: Can`t you just go with the letter "G" for that?
BECK: Yes, no, no, no. All right, what`s happening in the news?
HILL: OK, here we go. This kind of involves kids in a way, too. Summer driving. The season officially kicks off next weekend. Before you hit the road, though, we got a little gas update for you.
BECK: OK, good.
HILL: The good news for you today: gas prices might drop by about 10 cents a gallon in the next month.
BECK: Oh, let`s celebrate! Still higher than it was before. Oh, freak out!
HILL: Before you start the party, Glenn, with that extra dime, the bad news is they`re probably not going to go any lower than that this summer, because experts say inventory is still tight...
BECK: I`m shocked.
HILL: ... but demand is still reasonably high. And get this: They also say a growing economy suggests we`re all willing to pay $3 bucks a gallon.
BECK: They know this about us. They know we celebrate over 10 cents. Here`s my solution to the gas prices...
HILL: Walking?
BECK: No, build refineries, get a uniform blend, and, oh, yes, build more refineries! There`s your solution.
HILL: Have you heard back from the gas companies on that proposal?
BECK: No, they`re not taking my calls any more.
HILL: Interesting. Well, don`t give up, buddy. Don`t give up.
This next one is basically from the "Huh?" file. It`s one of the wackier stories we`ve seen in a while. An Arkansas mayor is free on bond tonight after he was arrested for allegedly seeking sex in exchange for not shutting off people`s water off. Yes, you heard that correctly.
According to court filings, there are two women who claim they had sex with -- whoops, my IFB just dropped.
BECK: I hate when that happens.
HILL: Oh, I can still hear you, though, so we`re fine.
BECK: Yes, OK.
HILL: Anyway, so the women claimed that they had sex with the mayor, Troy Anderson, in exchange for money or favors. One woman says the mayor took care of her $60 late water deposit, then changed the name on her water bill to keep the water running. Authorities say both women wore recording devices. The mayor has been charged with abusing public trust and patronizing a prostitute. Interestingly, no comment from the mayor yet.
BECK: No, I`ve got to tell you, it better have been good sex for $65.
HILL: Again, no comment from the mayor.
BECK: Can I ask you a question?
(CROSSTALK)
BECK: No, two questions -- have you ever had sex for money? No, two questions.
HILL: No!
BECK: The stairway behind you, where does that go?
HILL: Oh, that`s a Headline News secret. I can`t divulge that.
BECK: Really? It goes nowhere, does it?
HILL: That`s not true. It does actually lead up to something, but I can`t stand on it because I`d break it.
BECK: OK. Oh, you don`t have a bad body image, do you?
HILL: No, no, I`m not talking about being stupidly skinny or any of that stuff. No, just because really, you know, my cat might break it, and she weighs, like, eight pounds.
BECK: Really? OK. Second question is: Do you think this set makes me look fat?
HILL: Glenn, darling, no.
BECK: Oh...
HILL: I think the lighting is very flattering on your. You`re looking svelte.
BECK: Really? If I could just get lighting to get take this chin away, I`d be great.
HILL: Talk to the girls in makeup. Trust me. They can do wonders.
BECK: Erica, thank you so much. Have a great weekend. We`ll see you Monday.
HILL: You too. See you Monday.
BECK: Oh, wait, wait. Erica, is she gone already? There`s one more thing I wanted to show you. Speaking of self-image, did you see the photos of President Bush yesterday? He was zooming along the Arizona-Mexico border. There he is.
Have some self-respect. You`re the frickin` president of the United States! What is this? He`s like in a monster truck show. This is embarrassing. This does not help your poll numbers, Mr. President. I`m a supporter, and I look at you and I -- stop it! Get back to the White House and do something, will you?
Back in a second.
(COMMERCIAL BREAK)
BECK: All right. Season finale of "The Sopranos" is coming up. That can only mean one thing: Somebody big is about to be whacked. It`s going to be Vito. Last week, close call for Tony`s brother-in-law. Steve Schirripa is Bobby Bacala, and he was whacked in the eye, wearing a bandage. He`s also the author of "The Goomba Diet: Living Large and Loving It."
Welcome to the program, Steve, how are you?
STEVEN R. SCHIRRIPA, BOBBY BACCALIERI, "THE SOPRANOS": Good to see you, man. How`s everything?
BECK: Very good. Very good.
SCHIRRIPA: All right.
BECK: We just had somebody on -- there was a new survey about, you know, people who would rather lose a limb than be fat. You`re kind of the opposite.
SCHIRRIPA: Well, first of all, obviously my book is a joke book. It`s a joke. I would give anything to lose 40 pounds myself, but it`s a joke book. And it`s about...
BECK: Don`t say this to me. No, I don`t want to know.
SCHIRRIPA: It`s about all the things in life.
BECK: No, I want somebody who`s fat that says, "I`m OK with being fat."
SCHIRRIPA: It`s about all the things in life which are important to me: food, love, work, family. Have a good time. Enjoy yourself. Forget macrobiotics. Forget yoga. You`re going to go outside, god forbid, and get hit by a car. Enjoy yourself.
BECK: Atkins should have had the banana split. He fell down the stairs and died.
SCHIRRIPA: Let me tell you something.
BECK: I know.
SCHIRRIPA: On the Goomba diet, OK, you feel like you`re putting on a few pounds? You find fatter friends, right? You need motivation to run? You don`t pay your bookie for three weeks. You know, the doctor says your too fat? Get another doctor.
Enjoy yourself. Have fun. Obviously, it is a joke book. Am I OK fat? I`m all right. There`s a lot of skinny actors out of work, you know what I mean? I`m doing all right.
BECK: I know.
SCHIRRIPA: TV needs fat guys. Jim Gandolfini and me, we`re doing OK.
BECK: Yes, but I mean -- you know, and the amazing thing is, I saw Gandolfini on "The Sopranos," I don`t know, a couple of weeks ago, and I thought he`s gained a lot of weight, hasn`t he, since the series began?
SCHIRRIPA: You know...
BECK: Come on.
SCHIRRIPA: I guess. But you don`t remember the series began in 1997.
BECK: Yes, but it`s the only TV show in America where you can...
SCHIRRIPA: You just lost weight.
BECK: Yes, I did.
SCHIRRIPA: You`re a fat man in a skinny man body.
(CROSSTALK)
BECK: There`s a fat man screaming to get out.
SCHIRRIPA: Come on out. Come with me. Glenn, come with me, brother. You can do it!
BECK: Right.
SCHIRRIPA: But, you know, I mean, we talk about the book and all things that are good things to eat, and there`s a lot of junk and a lot of crap. And, I mean, I`m talking this real good Italian food, and fun, and conversation, and wine. You can`t watch every minute of your life. You can`t. You could over do it, you know. Look, if I actually watch what I eat, if I didn`t watch, I would be like one of those guys you got to need a forklift to get out of the apartment, you know?
BECK: Right. I watch it as it`s shoveled into my mouth, man. I married into an Italian family. Holy mother of everything that`s good and sacred. You never stop eating in an Italian family.
SCHIRRIPA: And there`s no bad time. Like, you never hear like Italian say, "How could you eat at a time like this?" Because we could eat at any time.
(LAUGHTER)
A funeral, give me the food.
BECK: The first time I was at a holiday, it was -- I think it was Christmas or Easter, and we sat down at the table to have dinner, and it was 1:00 in the afternoon. My brother-in-law, who married in -- he`s not Italian, either -- I loaded up my plate. And he nudged me at the table and he said, "Slow down, brother, you have no idea." We didn`t get off the table until 7:30.
SCHIRRIPA: You know what happens is, you know, usually you eat, and then it`s like 3:00, 4:00, and then take a little rest, and then 6:00 or 7:00, here it comes again.
BECK: No, but then grandma comes in, "Who wants chicken?"
SCHIRRIPA: Well, what`s wrong with that? What`s wrong with that?
BECK: I can`t eat that much, man.
(CROSSTALK)
SCHIRRIPA: ... so you take your time. You know, you take small bites. On the show, we eat a lot. I mean, you know, and I`ll tell you what -- you know, it`s, like, 6:00 in the morning. You go, "Wow, chicken cacciatore." You know, we`re going to do this scene. And I go, "I`ve got a license to eat chicken cacciatore for the next"...
BECK: Right.
SCHIRRIPA: ... but now it`s six hours later.
BECK: I didn`t feel good about that. Could we take it one more time, please?
SCHIRRIPA: You know what I mean? What do you do?
BECK: I know.
(CROSSTALK)
BECK: No, I mean, that`s what I mean.
SCHIRRIPA: Where are we going?
BECK: No, you`re feeding me lasagna. I don`t get a good take.
SCHIRRIPA: But until it`s, you know, six hours later. Now you`re going, "I mean, I can`t eat the chicken no more." I think Gandolfini was clucking in one scene, you know what I mean?
BECK: You married?
SCHIRRIPA: I`m married.
BECK: Children?
SCHIRRIPA: Skinny, my wife`s skinny.
BECK: I wasn`t going to ask you that.
(CROSSTALK)
SCHIRRIPA: You figure fat guy, fat wife.
BECK: No, no, no, no.
(CROSSTALK)
BECK: I think "Sopranos" star, hot wife.
SCHIRRIPA: I`ve been married for 17 years before I was on "The Sopranos."
(CROSSTALK)
SCHIRRIPA: That`s when you know you`ve got a good one.
BECK: What`s the secret?
SCHIRRIPA: You know what?
BECK: No, no, let me ask you: What`s the secret of being married for a long time to a beautiful woman and you being fat?
(LAUGHTER)
SCHIRRIPA: Being nice, being nice. I`m a nice guy. I remember the anniversary. I remember the thing. What`s so hard? Is it so hard? Flowers here and there, take her out. What`s the big deal?
BECK: All right, let me change gears here.
SCHIRRIPA: She`s got 85 pairs of shoes. That`s the thing.
BECK: I came into the studio -- I do a radio show -- came into the studio on Monday, and the guys that produced the radio show are all talking. And they all watch "The Sopranos." And they came in, and I said, "What the hell, were you watching gay porn this weekend?" Just based on their conversation. What the heck is happening with the gay sex between fat mobsters?
SCHIRRIPA: You know, Vito told me to give you a kiss, but I`m not going to do it, because he`s got his eye on you. He`s got his eye on you.
BECK: He`s hot. You know, I mean every...
(CROSSTALK)
BECK: Just not gay men, it is straight men, gay women, everybody in America wants to see him having sex.
SCHIRRIPA: Yes, he would be, like, way on the bottom of my list. I don`t know who`s on the top. But you know what?
BECK: That`s Hell. That`s my definition of Hell.
SCHIRRIPA: What, to go to bed with Vito?
BECK: For eternity. I come down, there`s -- you know, he`s got horns...
SCHIRRIPA: But he`s a good cook.
BECK: ... and he`s like, "You`re having sex with him for all time."
SCHIRRIPA: But he`s a good cook. He`s going to feed you before. See, he was making something nice, you see that?
BECK: Really, something really good?
SCHIRRIPA: Let me tell you. I think Joe Gannascoli, who`s the actor who`s playing Vito, did a great job. I commend him. Not easy to do. He`s straight, you know.
BECK: Listen to you.
SCHIRRIPA: Wait, wait, wait, David Chase, to do this, I mean, I give him a lot of credit. I mean, of course there`s gay characters on shows, but, you know, gay mobsters, a gay, waddling mobster, no less.
BECK: Steve Schirripa, thank you so much for being on the program.
SCHIRRIPA: Pleasure, man.
BECK: Pleasure, sir. Best of luck to you.
SCHIRRIPA: Good luck to you.
BECK: Bye-bye.
(COMMERCIAL BREAK)
(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)
ANNOUNCER: Hey, fatty, is that you? No, I mean, literally, is that you on the screen? If so, good god, are you fat! And I don`t mean the kind with a "ph." I mean the kind like this, where they put you on the TV with your face not shown, you know, for legal reasons. Man, you are so fat!
AUDIENCE: How fat are you?
ANNOUNCER: Well, you`re so fat that when you -- sorry, not appropriate. I was saying, if you are one of these people, listen up, because we`re about to whip you into shape. It`s time for the Glenn Beck Diet Revolution. It`s time to be scared skinny.
(END VIDEO CLIP)
BECK: OK, hold on just a second. Roll that back. Roll the video back for a second, will you? What are the ethics of this kind of stock footage? Why is it OK to show all of their fatness, but not their head? I`m just wondering. I think there`s like 12 people that specialize in this type of shot, you know?
They just waddle down the street. Look at that. Wouldn`t you be horrified if you got home and you were like, "Holy cow, that`s a nice, tight shot on my gut." You know, look at some of these shots. There are people walking towards the camera whose faces you can see clear as a day.
You`re allowed to apparently show thin peoples` faces as they walk down the street, but if you`re fat I`m only allowed to show you -- legally only allowed to show your butt.
What we`d like to do is to make sure that you`re never appearing on cable news stock footage, help you get thin. I`ve actually had a lot of e- mail from people who asked me, you know, "Glenn, you say on the radio that you`re fat," that`s because I`m a recovering fat person. I lost about 40 pounds in the last year or so.
And, really, the way I`ve done is just scared -- before I knew I was going to have a TV show, this was not white, OK? Just scare the living crap out of you that, you know, you`re going to look like the biggest fat tub of lard ever on television.
If you want to lose weight, I need to get you on TV. Go to GlennBeck.com and see "Scared Skinny." There`s a Web form there that we want you to fill out, if you`re really committed to dropping weight.
Here`s the outline in a nutshell. You set a goal for how much weight you want to lose in the amount of time, and then you send me a picture of you in a Speedo or something low cut and lacy. If you don`t make your weight loss goal, I show the picture of you on TV. I also put you up at GlennBeck.com and I publish it in our magazine, "Fusion."
Now, there`s more to it, and I`m sure there`s a huge legal disclaimer there, but you can get all the details at GlennBeck.com.
By the way, Steve Schirripa of "The Sopranos" going to be on the radio show on Monday. And another Steve, one of our fantastic camera guys, is leaving us for a little bit. Want to wish him the best of luck.
Have a great weekend. See you then, you sick, twisted freak.
END
