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Joy Behar Page
Weekly Round-up; Lisa Oz on Relationships
Aired April 23, 2010 - 21:00 ET
THIS IS A RUSH TRANSCRIPT. THIS COPY MAY NOT BE IN ITS FINAL FORM AND MAY BE UPDATED.
JOY BEHAR, HOST: Tonight on THE JOY BEHAR SHOW, the Gosselins are making headlines again. Will Kate Gosselin`s career have legs and will she use those legs, God willing, for something other than dancing?
Then Scott Baio`s wife tweets homophobic messages, Baio tweets in defense of his wife. She tweets something else. He tweets even more. You know, tweeting is dangerous. Can we stop this people from running off with their phones?
And Sarah Silverman -- I love her -- she offends some people with her outrageous and unapologetic humor. But how can you be angry with someone that adorable? It`s like getting mad at Thumper.
All that and more, right now.
Well, my girl, Kate Gosselin, was finally voted off of "Dancing with the Stars" this week and she got a little misty-eyed about it. Well, more than a little misty-eyed; she was bereft. Check it out.
(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)
KATE GOSSELIN, REALITY STAR: I had the opportunity. I`m very, very honored to have been here. I love everyone that I met. It was a great experience and I`m sorry I`m crying. I`m a cry baby.
(END VIDEO CLIP)
BEHAR: Well, since new reports say Jon Gosselin has dumped his lawyer and wants to work things out with Kate, maybe those were tears of joy.
With me to discuss this and more in the week`s news dish is comedian and co-host of "That Metals Show" on VH1 classic Jim Florentine; comedian, Wendy Liebman; and correspondent or MSN`s "Cool Runnings" Antonio Neves.
Ok guys. She couldn`t dance and this may be the end of the Kate Gosselin conversations because she might have jumped the shark with "Dancing with the Stars". What do you think? Because she couldn`t dance. What do you think, Jim.
JIM FLORENTINE, VH1 CO-HOST, "THAT METALS SHOW": I have to be honest with you. I have a penis. I don`t watch the show.
BEHAR: Ok.
FLORENTINE: You know, it`s just not my thing.
BEHAR: Yes. Your penis is your thing.
FLORENTINE: That`s what some women say.
BEHAR: What do you think?
ANTONIO NEVES, CORRESPONDENT, "COOL RUNNINGS": I don`t think she jumped the shark at all. She actually has two brand new shows coming out pretty soon; one with her following her kids. She also has a show where she goes out and helps other families.
And beyond that, I think her evolution has been pretty remarkable. This was a woman who when she first started on the TLC show "Jon & Kate plus 8" she didn`t have glowing reviews; people did not like her. Now she`s like America`s sweetheart.
BEHAR: Yes, she`d really changed her image. She`s like Madonna. She reinvents herself with every new dumb show.
So Wendy --
WENDY LIEBMAN, COMEDIAN: And she has so much more hair now.
BEHAR: Yes.
LIEBMAN: I think there`s another kid up there.
BEHAR: You think so? In the hair? In the hair?
FLORENTINE: Maybe because the husband is such a jerk that it makes her look better, too.
BEHAR: That could be.
FLORENTINE: And the guy`s always crying. He doesn`t have any money. He says, I don`t have any money. You`re wearing Ed Hardy outfits all the time. I have no sympathy for you. Put Old Navy on, then I`ll cry with you.
BEHAR: That`s true; $2 for a T-shirt.
LIEBMAN: Yes. He should have dumped his stylist instead of his lawyer.
BEHAR: Well, why so emotional. What are the tears about?
NEVES: Maybe she`s missing her family? This woman has eight kids.
BEHAR: I doubt that, very much.
NEVES: She is never at home. She`s staying busy. You have to give this woman credit because this is a woman who has two left feet, obviously, deciding to go on "Dancing with the Stars" and lasted a lot longer than a lot of people anticipated.
I mean I think Cloris Leachman lasted longer than she did.
BEHAR: Cloris Leachman was a pretty good dancer. This one can`t dance.
He said he wants to work out things privately and amicably with Kate. Why do you suppose he changed his mind? Because originally, he was like mad at her; he had another girlfriend. He was saying he wanted sole custody. He changed that now, too. Now he`s saying they could share the custody. What happened?
FLORENTINE: Just A couple of days ago he was saying that she`s a publicity whore and she doesn`t take care of the kids because she`s doing TV. And then he says eventually I would like TV show. So what does that mean?
BEHAR: I don`t know. What does he mean?
LIEBMAN: Well, he fired his lawyer. He wants it to be just between him and Kate and "The National Enquirer" apparently.
BEHAR: Do you know who else is getting a reality show, supposedly? She`s shopping it around. Rachel Uchitel -- remember her -- one of Tiger Woods` -- what shall we call her? I get in trouble every time I mention her name.
FLORENTINE: Mistress.
BEHAR: Yes.
FLORENTINE: She was number one actually.
BEHAR: She was kind of like a woman who found other women for him, right?
NEVES: VIP host.
BEHAR: She was a VIP hostess.
FLORENTINE: He was also -- supposedly sleeping with her, too, and then eventually she just got other women for him. It`s amazing. She knew that this guy was married --
BEHAR: Right.
FLORENTINE: -- and now she`s going to get a reality show. I slept with a married woman once I got punched in the face.
(CROSSTALK)
BEHAR: Well, that`s the way it should be. So she`s getting a show. Maybe she could call it "Uchitel: I`m a Home Wrecker."
FLORENTINE: I like that.
BEHAR: Do you like that? It`s got a ring.
LIEBMAN: How about "Tiger plus 8".
FLORENTINE: I heard it was bigger than that, "Tiger plus 12".
BEHAR: Really? Well, excuse me.
Ok. Let`s change the topic. The creators of the show "South Park" got a warning this week from a Muslim Web site which claims that a recent episode about the prophet Muhammad could lead to a lot of anger among Muslims.
Watch.
(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)
UNIDENTIFIED MALE: You`ve done this town a huge favor, Muhammad.
UNIDENTIFIED MALE: Hold on a second. Stop. There are extremists threatening that if we give Muhammad to the celebrities they`re going to bomb us.
(END VIDEO CLIP)
BEHAR: Well, Matt Stone and Trey Parker didn`t back down and have since aired a follow-up episode about censorship showing an image of Muhammad with his body obscured by a black box to make the point that they`re being censored. These guys do not scare easily, I tell you. They are coming right back.
FLORENTINE: We don`t even know if that was Muhammad in that big bear outfit. That could have been Buddha.
BEHAR: Well, they called him Muhammad.
FLORENTINE: I know but who knows if their next episode it`s really take the bear costume off and it`s Buddha or Jesus or somebody else. We don`t even know.
BEHAR: Also, a lot of Arabs are called Muhammad, you know, and Muslims are called Muhammad. Why should it be The Muhammad?
NEVES: Because in the Islamic fate, it`s pretty much blasphemy to have any physical depiction or representation of the prophet Muhammad.
And as you mentioned earlier, Matt and Trey don`t back down whatsoever. They`ve had had criticism from the Catholic League, from gay advocacy organizations, from the Church of Scientology. I mean literally governments, Russia and Mexico, have banned these programs from being shown. But they`ve been aggressive, but Time Warner -- excuse me -- Comedy Central censored a large portion of that show.
BEHAR: I`ve heard about that. Let`s take a look at another clip. This one is from part deux, it aired this week.
(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)
UNIDENTIFIED MALE: Why it`s an African-American man, Kevin. Yes, what do you want?
UNIDENTIFIED MALE: Yo, man, sorry to bother you. There`s been an accident down the street, man. Can I use your telephone?
UNIDENTIFIED MALE: I`m terribly sorry, but I don`t let strangers in.
(END VIDEO CLIP)
BEHAR: See? I just have to say, I have a vagina, I never watch that show. But when I see those clips, I say these guys are really out there and what are they trying to do?
FLORENTINE: But who is taking this cartoon show serious? They used to have a main character that was a turd.
BEHAR: Yes.
FLORENTINE: Really. So are we really going to protest against it? I mean it`s silly. The show is just silly.
BEHAR: Yes, but they`re trying -- they seem to be trying to make a point, not just comedy.
NEVES: They`re looking at free speech.
(CROSSTALK)
LIEBMAN: These guys have chutzpah.
(CROSSTALK)
LIEBMAN: I think we will finally know who killed Kenny.
BEHAR: Kenny or Kennedy?
LIEBMAN: Kenny, the character. Yes, you don`t watch the show.
BEHAR: I thought that was another episode, who killed Kennedy.
NEVES: The back story with all of this is you look over at Denmark. For some reason Denmark seems to be having a lot of problems with this where a Danish cartoon that was published in 2005, this guy got death threats. A Danish filmmaker Theo Van Gogh, I believe his name was.
BEHAR: No, that`s another story. That guy was Dutch? Theo Van Gogh was Dutch and he was a documentary film maker. The cartoonist was Danish.
LIEBMAN: Then there was that teddy bear, the woman who had a teddy bear named Muhammad. That she was --
BEHAR: I mean they don`t like.
FLORENTINE: It`s a double standard though. If the Catholics got offended by something, Comedy Central goes that`s free speech. Muslims do it, all right we`ll take it off, we`ll bleep everything.
BEHAR: Why is that? They`re scared of the Muslims?
FLORENTINE: Of course they`re scared of them, absolutely. I mean say what you want, but the Catholics are conservative, they`re very narrow- minded but they don`t, you know, blow things up when they`re mad. They just fire off an angry letter.
BEHAR: No, they send a priest to your house.
Comedy Central censored 35 seconds of a conversation in the show between Jesus Christ and Santa Claus. Are they afraid of Santa, too? I mean --
FLORENTINE: No, I think they`re going to appease the Catholics now. They`re going to say, well, we censored Jesus too so, now we did the Muslims and Jesus. They threw that in.
There`s been a character of Jesus on there since, like, day one, make fun of him all the time. They had the Pope on a couple of weeks ago, making fun of molesting kids. So it`s like, come on --
BEHAR: They go for it.
NEVES: And in an episode, I think, Buddha was snorting some type of drug and Jesus was watching pornography. But we didn`t --
BEHAR: See everybody -- it`s equal opportunity.
FLORENTINE: Buddha snorting coke on there -- the Buddhists didn`t come out and go that`s ridiculous. They`re peaceful people.
BEHAR: Do you think they`re watching, the Buddhists are watching this show? I don`t think so.
FLORENTINE: Do you think the extreme Muslims are? They don`t even have TVs.
BEHAR: Somebody is watching it. They`re out there looking.
Ok. Former "Happy Days" actor Scott Baio has found himself at the center of a Twitter controversy. Apparently Scott is angry over having to pay his taxes.
This is what he wrote, "Taxes are done. That should feed, house and provide medical for a few lazy nonworking people at my expense. Have a great Monday."
He`s illiterate, but the Web site, jezebel.com reprinted the tweet generating plenty of angry feedbacks so Baio`s wife, Renee lashed out at some of the people who posted comments. And here`s what she said, "F-you, jezebel.com web rag. You bunch of far left lesbian s (blank). No wonder you`re all lesbos because what man in his right man could put up with your c--tness? Scott Baio has more class in his piss than all of you."
Now that is a classy girl.
Ok, first of all guys, isn`t that more letters than you`re allowed in tweets?
NEVES: Only 140 characters.
BEHAR: That was like 150 characters. And it still didn`t make any sense.
FLORENTINE: What does that mean? He has more class in his pee?
BEHAR: I don`t know.
FLORENTINE: I never heard that before. Does that mean his pee opens doors for ladies when they come through or something? What does that mean?
BEHAR: I guess that`s what it means. Since when is she qualified, whoever she is, to lecture -- Scott Baio`s wife qualified to lecture on class?
Do you think Renee Baio did more harm than good by answering the thing or what?
NEVES: Absolutely. I think Twitter and --
BEHAR: Baio?
NEVES: -- Facebook, people talk way too much. You don`t have a filter anymore. I think the funny byproduct of this is now there`s a hash tag on Twitter that people kind of follow this and it`s called Scott Baio ruins everything, which I think is pretty hilarious.
BEHAR: He`s trying to get back in the public eye.
NEVES: He actually wrote I`m retired.
BEHAR: -- Chachi --
NEVES: And he wrote the -- I`m retired stop making me relevant. But he`s pretty active on there.
BEHAR: He`s a Hollywood Republican, you know. And a lot of times I hear that oh, they`re very upset because you can`t be a Republican in Hollywood. Kelsey Grammar has a thing on some right-wing channel now. He`s writing this stuff. They`re all yelling.
FLORENTINE: Mel Gibson.
BEHAR: Mel Gibson, yes, exactly.
LIEBMAN: I think the fact that she wrote about him and said that Charles was no longer in charge.
BEHAR: That really said it. She is in charge now. Ok.
Thank you very much, guys.
And if you`re in New York, you can see Wendy performing at Comics Friday night and Saturday.
We`ll be right back in a minute.
(COMMERCIAL BREAK)
BEHAR: She`s a housewife and mother of four, living in New Jersey who moonlights as a writer, producer and entrepreneur. In her new book "Us: Transforming ourselves in the relationships that matter most" she gives the readers an inside look in her own relationships, including the one with her husband, Dr. Mehmet Oz.
Welcome to the show, Liza Oz.
Now, you say in the book you have to work on three different levels of a relationship. What are the three?
LIZA OZ, AUTHOR, "US": Well, what I talk about living in relationship because I think our relationships define who we are and set the quality of our life. So we live in three areas of relationship. The first is with ourselves and that sets the tone of every other relationship because that`s the one you can work on.
BEHAR: How do you work on that?
OZ: Oh, my gosh. Starting with complete honesty and self observation.
BEHAR: Right.
OZ: So, just -- just really watching yourself, trying to separate from the emotion and observing without judgment, without labeling and seeing where you are and then going -- you know, I`m mad at Joy for flirting with that one.
BEHAR: For flirting with Mehmet?
OZ: But what am I really mad about?
BEHAR: Yes.
OZ: What is really going on?
BEHAR: Right.
OZ: And getting to that place of honesty and connecting with a place that`s deeper than all the superficial identifications.
BEHAR: Yes.
OZ: And then being less attached to all of those superficial identifications --
BEHAR: Ok.
OZ: -- so you can connect on a deeper level.
BEHAR: And the second one?
OZ: With other people.
BEHAR: Yes.
OZ: And that includes your spouse --
BEHAR: Your spousal equivalent.
OZ: The children, the -- your co-workers, your boss, the people on the street. Every person you come in contact with because I think we really do have a tremendous influence, one that we don`t even know about.
BEHAR: Yes.
OZ: So to approach this consciously.
BEHAR: Do you that if you don`t have the first one down where you don`t know yourself or you don`t observe yourself objectively that you can have the second one?
OZ: You can have it, but it won`t be optimal because you`re coming into that relationship with less awareness and less real presence.
BEHAR: I mean, most people I know, who I work with, generally speaking --
OZ: Yes.
BEHAR: -- I don`t know that they observe themselves that easily.
OZ: Well, I think we go through life very unaware on many levels.
BEHAR: Yes.
OZ: And it`s never like you get it, like I know me. It`s a process.
BEHAR: Yes.
OZ: And it`s constant, it`s ongoing and hopefully tomorrow you`ll have gotten a little better than you were today.
BEHAR: I see and the third one?
OZ: With the divine or whatever you term the divine, something higher than yourself that gives your life significance and purpose.
BEHAR: Oh, what if you don`t believe in that?
OZ: Well, you know, I think that if it`s just you, if you`re the bottom line, if there`s nothing bigger, ethics --
BEHAR: Oh, I see.
OZ: It doesn`t have to be personified God but something that`s more important than what you want.
BEHAR: Morality.
OZ: Morality --
BEHAR: Doing the right thing in life.
OZ: -- there`s the planets -- anything that gives your life real meaning other than you know, what do I want this morning?
BEHAR: I see. Ok.
Now, you`re married to Dr. Mehmet Oz.
OZ: Yes, I am.
BEHAR: And listen, he`s not here. So let`s talk about him.
OZ: Ok, we could arm wrestle for him.
BEHAR: He`s a character, you know, I mean, he is a character but he`s very good at what he does.
OZ: Yes.
BEHAR: But he is -- tell me what`s wrong with him? He`s got to have a couple of things wrong because he seems perfect.
OZ: Well, he is pretty perfect.
BEHAR: He is.
OZ: He is and -- but I can -- I can think of one thing in particular that drives me crazy. You know what? I`ll give you another secret that I haven`t actually told people, and it`s not in the book.
BEHAR: Ok.
OZ: He`s not a great singer.
BEHAR: He doesn`t sing?
OZ: Oh, he does. But he`s not very good at it.
BEHAR: Oh I see, does he know that -- has he self observed that he`s a lousy singer?
OZ: Yes, he -- but he loves it is so much that it doesn`t really matter.
BEHAR: Yes, yes, yes.
OZ: And he has such a good time. It`s not terrible; he`s just not -- he`s not a crooner.
BEHAR: You say in the book that people -- women should stop trying to change their men. I think that is very good advice. How did you work that out with your husband?
OZ: Well, one of the things -- the other thing he does that drives me crazy is that he is never on time for anything.
BEHAR: How about his TV show? How about when he`s operating on a person? He`s a heart surgeon. I`ll be there in half an hour? The guy`s dead.
OZ: Well, I don`t know how he manages with that, but you know what, the thing is he has to come to his TV show three hours before they start taping so I guess there`s a little wiggle room there.
BEHAR: I see.
OZ: But with dinner, how much wiggle room can you have for dinner? We`re going to eat at 7:00 and then it`s 10:30.
BEHAR: Really?
OZ: So yes, that`s where --
BEHAR: That must have aggravated you.
OZ: It drove me crazy. Still I`m not -- I`m still not totally cool with him walking through the door at 10:30 and everything is burnt and the kids are exhausted.
BEHAR: Yes.
OZ: But it`s -- you know I realized that my frustration has more to do with me than to do with him.
BEHAR: So how did you handle that?
OZ: For the longest time, I cried. I screamed. I bribed, I cajoled, I manipulated, I tried everything I could to get him to a place where he understood that it was important to have dinner at home. And now I realize that it`s not going to happen. Unless he wants to do it, I`m not going to make him do it.
BEHAR: So why do you cook for him?
OZ: I don`t. That`s part of the solution.
BEHAR: Oh yes, right, yes.
OZ: But I cook for the kids and we do what they want to do, we`d have our life and then, when he gets home, I`m not -- I`m not resenting him, because I haven`t expected him.
BEHAR: Right.
OZ: You know, there`s no thwarted expectation.
BEHAR: But does he come in the door and say, "Lisa where is my dinner?"
OZ: He doesn`t do that anymore either.
BEHAR: He used to do that?
OZ: Oh yes, oh yes.
BEHAR: So you trained him don`t do that and I won`t bother you about coming in late.
OZ: Well, it wasn`t -- but it wasn`t that kind of overt agreement but that`s sort of what happened. I stopped -- I stopped making dinner for him and he stopped expecting dinner and I stopped being angry and he stopped being upset when I was angry. So --
BEHAR: So you worked that out?
OZ: It took a long time.
BEHAR: You`ve been together 25 years.
OZ: I know, it took a really long time.
BEHAR: And you have four children and you seem like you have a great relationship with him. So --
OZ: It`s good. It`s just like everyone else`s relationship. It`s work. You`ve to work on it. If you have good days, bad days --
BEHAR: But not too much work, what, am I collecting tolls on the Jersey turnpike?
OZ: Yes, it`s fun --
BEHAR: Life could be so much work. I want it to be fun.
OZ: This is work and this is fun, right? So it`s like a job that you love --
BEHAR: I guess.
OZ: --= because it`s fun.
BEHAR: Well, I`m not married. Thanks Lisa.
The book is called "Us: Transforming ourselves and the relationships that matter most".
We`ll be back in a minute.
(COMMERCIAL BREAK)
BEHAR: When Angelique Naylor married her lesbian partner in Massachusetts where same-sex marriage is legal, little did she know she would have so much trouble trying to get a divorce in Texas, the state that banned gay marriage. Apparently Texas wants to preserve the sanctity of divorce.
Joining me now is Angelique Naylor. Hello Angelique, how are you?
ANGELIQUE NAYLOR, GAY SPOUSE DENIED DIVORCE: Hi, Joy. Doing great.
BEHAR: It`s ironic that a state that bans gay marriage is trying so hard to keep two lesbians married isn`t it? It warms my heart.
NAYLOR: It`s a little shocking, yes. And I actually wrote a letter to Greg Abbott before I filed for divorce when he went against the Dallas couple and told him he could be the champion for abolishing gay marriage if he would just support gay divorce not knowing I was going to file.
BEHAR: Well, what`s the latest on your legal battle exactly?
NAYLOR: My divorce is final. It was ruled on by the judge February 10th. The final decree got into my hands on March 31st. And now just a few days ago the attorney general has filed a notice of appeal in my case, which is actually kind of strange because there`s another case very similar to mine going to a hearing tomorrow in Dallas in the Appeals Court.
BEHAR: So -- but what`s his problem? Why is he -- why won`t he let you get divorced in Texas? You already got it. I mean he`s overturning the ruling, right?
NAYLOR: Absolutely. He`s appealing a final decree divorce, I believe, for political posturing. It is an election year; he wants to look really strong for the conservative vote.
There was no reason to appeal my case with an almost identical case already going to an appeals hearing in just a few days. It just seemed quite absurd to me, actually.
BEHAR: Well, he said that, quote, "It`s an attack on Texas constitution. If they recognize gay divorce they`ll have to recognize gay marriage." He has a point in a way, doesn`t he?
NAYLOR: I slightly disagree because same-sex marriage is constitutionally banned. It is not possible for two people of the same gender to get married in Texas unless the people voted again and overturned the law. So I do disagree and he can recognize the marriage for the sole purpose of granting the divorce and extend full faith and credit to the state of Massachusetts by granting the divorce.
BEHAR: Right. You`re saying one thing does not necessarily have to do with the other anyway? He`s just posturing.
NAYLOR: He`s just posturing. I believe them to be separate issues, yes.
BEHAR: Ok. Why not get divorced in Massachusetts now?
NAYLOR: There`s a one-year residency requirement and my spouse and I -- my former spouse and I have a 4-year-old boy, businesses, our parents all live here. Our parents are elderly. It just didn`t make economic or financial sense to move to the state of Massachusetts for an entire year when all Texas had to do was extend full faith and credit and go ahead and grant the divorce.
BEHAR: I see. So what are you going to do? What`s your next step?
NAYLOR: Waiting to hear what the Dallas ruling will be and I believe that that hearing is tomorrow and from there deciding what our stance will be with the attorney general. My case is slightly different in that the attorney general is trying to intervene after the fact. However, in the Dallas case he got to those guys before their divorce was final.
So my case, while similar, is slightly different and I think our constitutional arguments will be a little bit different as well.
BEHAR: Ok. Well, Angelique, thank you very much for joining us tonight. And good luck with your situation. Ok.
NAYLOR: Thank you, Joy.
BEHAR: All right.
Sandra Bullock was spotted without her wedding ring. I`ll have details next.
(COMMERCIAL BREAK)
BEHAR: First Sandra Bullock moved out of the house and now she`s being seen out in public again. Thank goodness, I was starting to feel a little gray gardensy there. According to new photos exclusives from "Entertainment Tonight" she`s no longer wearing her wedding ring. Is this a symbolic move to telegraph that she`s done with Jesse James and ready to move on with her life. With me to discuss this and much more is John Fugelsang. It`s really not that easy to say your name.
JOHN FUGELSANG, COMEDIAN: You are telling me.
BEHAR: Actor and comedian, Nancy Giles social commentator and contributor to CBS early morning. And Jon Robin Baitz playwright and the creator of "BROTHERS AND SISTERS," a great show. Unfortunately he`s no longer with them. But still it was great when you were with them.
JON ROBIN BAITZ, PLAYWRIGHT: Thanks, very much. It still has it`s --
BEHAR: But he created the show. I love it.
FUGELSANG: Yes - orphans.
BEHAR: OK.
NANCY GILES, SOCIAL COMMENTATOR: You`re it.
BAITZ: That`s for off the air, actually. But no.
BEHAR: So now let`s talk about Sandra, which is on the air. She had to come out eventually, right?
GILES: Right.
BEHAR: So she`s out now. She had to come out of the house. What does it mean? Why is she making a big sort of like a to-do about not wearing the ring?
GILES: Well is she making the big to-do, or I mean were cameras following her around to try to get the left hand picture. You know what I mean?
BEHAR: Well come on, let`s be real, she knows.
BAITZ: Would you wear the ring if, you know, had been lied to kind of from dawn to dusk? You wouldn`t wear the ring either would you.
BEHAR: No.
GILES: And if your significant other were dancing around with white supremacist sympathizers, would you still wear the ring?
BEHAR: Well I think that, look how pretty she is. What - doesn`t it do -- the fact remains that part of the conversations we`ve had over the months about this or weeks is that she was married to this guy with his Nazi memorabilia. And everybody is like, hello, the girl next door doesn`t know that`s what he`s into?
FUGELSANG: Well first of all, I got to say, he among you who hasn`t cheated on his Oscar winning wife with a white power tattoo model can cast the first stone.
(LAUGHTER)
FUGELSANG: But with that said.
BEHAR: OK.
FUGELSANG: If she had chosen to stay with him and support it and try to make the marriage work, I would have been behind it. No one is going to fault her especially in Hollywood for breaking up with a guy to makes Nazi sex tapes. The Nazi`s didn`t make Nazi sex tapes but I think that by going out with a bare fingered, no ring that`s a lot cheaper than hiring a publicist to announce it for her.
BEHAR: Right well she has a publicist, I`m sure. Let`s move on. Let`s talk about Oscar winning actress, another Oscar winning actress in the news today. The brother of Oscar winner Mo`nique went on Oprah yesterday to apologize for molesting her had they were children. It was easier I guess for him to get booked on Oprah than to just pick up and call his sister directly, you know? Listen to this.
(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)
GERALD IMES, MO`NIQUE`S BROTHER: I abused and betrayed the trust of another sibling, my sister. My blood sister. I`m sorry, Mo`nique. I`m sorry baby, I`m sorry.
(END VIDEO CLIP)
BEHAR: What is this about? I mean, I have Mo`nique`s phone number in case he wants to call her. You know, it`s like, why does he have to go on television and do this? Robby?
BAITZ: I really - I don`t understand when private life became public and public became entirely, ah, public. I don`t know. In my family you were taught to lie, quietly lie until someone got cancer and not to share these things, you know? I don`t understand why it`s sort of -- it`s the end of the world really.
GILES: Well I just feel like I have to say that I want to represent the black women in this country who haven`t been molested by their brothers and haven`t been incested by their fathers. And I know that because I come from a very funny family that when I do write book -- I`m working on a book -- it won`t be part of Oprah`s book club because it`s too happy.
(CROSSTALK)
BEHAR: It`s too happy, what - Nancy.
GILES: Not in her world. But I`m not trying to make fun of that. That has happened to people, but it`s getting so tiresome that every story about a black women that`s beaten, raped, you know, drawn and quartered and stuff like that, I just can`t handle it.
FUGELSANG: Did he wait until after the Oscars to do this?
BEHAR: Right, she`s got cash now, too.
FUGELSANG: Well she`s had cash for a while. You know Mo`nique. She know she look good. And I love Mo`nique. She`s a wonderful person and she deserved the Oscar. But she`s married sort of.
(CROSSTALK)
GILES: OK, right, sort of.
FUGELSANG: Here`s the thing. By this guy doing this, apologizing is not the same as taking responsibility for your actions. And he may have done that privately and he may choose to. Whether this was a self-serving thing like the parents there with collateral damage. All I can say is every time someone goes public about this -
BEHAR: Yes.
FUGELSANG: It makes it harder for someone to interfere with a child. Say what you want about this guy yesterday, by his doing this he`s more or less damned himself for the rest of the life. But he has made it tougher for someone to get away with interfering with a child.
BEHAR: You really think so?
FUGELSANG: The moral -- our grandmothers had no recourse that this was happening to them. Now the more people talk about it, the more victims, and in this case, an abuser comes forward and takes responsibility, the tougher it is going to be for someone else to get away with it.
BAITZ: I think it teaches them that they can get booked on Oprah on Wednesday night. And just come --
BEHAR: That`s what I think. Yes.
FUGELSANG: Where is he going to be booked after this? Now he`s got - he`s going to have the mark of a molester.
(CROSSTALK)
GILES: No, he`ll get a he reality show here.
FUGELSANG: No he won`t.
BAITZ: We are talking about an immoral universe. Like there is -
(CROSSTALK)
FUGELSANG: Listen I can think of a few popes that can come forward and they can mea culpa like that more than this guy.
GILES: And that would be just.
BEHAR: A few popes?
FUGELSANG: Oh yes, a few popes, actually -
GILES: So it is actually past and present.
FUGELSANG: Several hundreds years of popes.
BEHAR: OK, here`s another, speaking of Europe, let`s move on to something else.
(LAUGHTER)
BEHAR: Roman Polanski, how`s that for a segue?
FUGELSANG: -- stories.
GILES: Oh dear.
BEHAR: Roman Polanski wrote a letter to President Obama asking for leniency. We all know what he did. He molested and attacked a 13- year-old girl.
GILES: That`s right.
FUGELSANG: And drugged her.
BEHAR: Years and years ago, he`s old now.
GILES: And drugged her.
BEHAR: Guess who delivered it, guess who delivered the letter? French president Nicolas Sarkozy. OK, now, how cool is it to have the president -- have the president of France be your personal mailman?
GILES: Courier.
BEHAR: Come on.
FUGELSANG: That`s like Art Kelly give a letter from Obama to the president of Jamaica. It is fantastic. You know and this is interesting because it will only help Obama to reject this. And I mean there`s no way he can even consider the offer. I don`t really understand.
BEHAR: It`s gross. Can you imagine what the GOP would do to him if he delivered that letter, did something with that letter?
GILES: Plenty of women would do the same thing. You go and I`ll go.
BAITZ: You go.
GILES: All I was going to say is, I love how the hoi palloi try to manipulate, you know, law and things like that. I mean, I was so surprised to hear he`s going to deliver the letter.
BAITZ: Because it`s France, you know, and in France this is their lingua francas, it is sort of sexually, you know --
BEHAR: Lingua Franca I think that`s a very interesting technique.
GILES: That`s Spanish actually.
BAITZ: It`s Latin for the language of -- they`ve been doing this -- did anybody see it?
BEHAR: Or is that an airline. Air linga -
BAITZ: They deliver letters for other people, the perfumed letters I`m sure.
GILES: You are right. Or jewels even.
BAITZ: I`m sure.
GILES: I just think it`s - I still think that --
BAITZ: I mean who can blame him for writing to Obama. I mean, it`s not like Obama is busy.
(LAUGHTER)
FUGELSANG: I think he should be kept out of the country for that Oliver Twist remake alone. So you shouldn`t let him in just for that.
(CROSSTALK)
BEHAR: You know I just saw Roman Polanski, did you see "Ghostwriter." It`s really good. "Ghostwriter" yes, really terrific film. You know, now, you`re an artist in the same sort of category, Robby. You know you are a great play write. I don`t know if people realize how great a play write you are. And Polanski is a great artist and a lot of people in Hollywood and Europe have rallied around Polanski because he`s a great artist. Do you think a great artist should get a pass since this happened many, many years ago and the girl he molested doesn`t want to press charges?
BAITZ: This is what I think about this. It`s become a way for people to sort of impose their own interesting morality on something that has absolutely nothing with them. And so we get to feel better about ourselves when we talk about Polanski one way or the other. I actually think it`s sort of between Roman Polanski and the law, and everything else seems to be like the pinning of badges on people`s chests. I approve, I disapprove. In fact it has actually nothing to do with anybody, and I`ve been really -- I`ve been really struck by that the entire time. It`s a litmus test for people of who and what they seem to be.
BEHAR: OK. We can do one more story if we really go fast. OK, last night at a fund-raiser for Barbara Boxer President Obama took a break from being screamed at by extremists on the Right to get heckled by Gay Rights supporters on the Left. Let`s watch.
(BEGIN VIDE CLIP)
PRESIDENT BARACK OBAMA, UNITED STATES: She`s passionate about fighting for jobs, jobs with good wages, jobs with good benefits. She`s passionate about fighting for California`s families. She is -- we are going to do that. Hey, hold on a second. Hold on a second. We are going to do that.
(END VIDEO CLIP)
BEHAR: What Jon, you got a headache?
FUGELSANG: Well they`re not protesting the war. They`re protesting they can`t enlist, which they wouldn`t do anyway? You want to protest, go to Bill Clinton`s house. He`s the one who signed it.
GILES: Exactly, that`s exactly what I was going to say.
BEHAR: Well he`s not the president anymore, so what`s the point of going to Bill Clinton`s house?
GILES: To jump in on what John said, I`ll tell you what gets me, people are angrier for President Obama for trying to undo the actual law that President Clinton enabled. I mean, and look, the don`t tell part is built-in shame about who you are. I don`t feel like some of the professional people really understand how politics work and how it takes time to undo these things.
BAITZ: They`re not supposed to. They`re not suppose to. They`re supposed to fight for this thing in a way that actually makes sense. They`re not like the tea party guys ranting and raving. You know these are people who put their faith in Obama and the president and who have been asked again and again and again to take a back seat.
GILES: But look at what he`s done.
FUGELSANG: The Democratic Party will throw gays under the bus -
BAITZ: Absolutely.
FUGELSANG: Just the way the Republican Party throws pro-lifers under the bus. It`s not a Harry Truman thing where you can sign an executive order and lift this like you --
GILES: But I have to interrupt, guys. He`s actually having hearings, he`s got military people who are saying they are supporting it. Get mad at John McCain.
FUGELSANG: I understand -
GILES: And he`s only been in office for a year.
BEHAR: All right, we got to go - very interesting, thank you.
BAITZ: What? That`s it.
BEHAR: All so much, I know, it goes so fast. Up next, she`s hilarious and she`s cute and she`s a bed wetter. Cover the furniture. Sarah Silverman stops by next.
(COMMERCIAL BREAK)
BEHAR: She`s a comedian, actress, a musician -- musician? And now an author, of a new book entitled "The Bedwetter," also the original title of Karl Rove`s memoir, I believe, her edgy, unapologetic comedy takes on social taboos and controversial topics like racism, sexism, and religion. I`m happy to welcome back to my show the lovely and talented Ms. Sarah Silverman.
SARAH SILVERMAN, AUTHOR "BEDWETTER": Musician? I mean like I`m a super crappy guitarist. But I guess that counts.
BEHAR: So this, "The Bedwetter," quite a title for the book, I think.
SILVERMAN: What were you doing to the cover?
BEHAR: Oh, I was doodling.
SILVERMAN: How dare you.
BEHAR: What do you mean? You always put mustaches on yourself so I was doodling.
SILVERMAN: I do, actually.
BEHAR: I put it on.
SILVERMAN: Look what she did. This is the kind of respect that I get. That`s the respect I get.
BEHAR: So you`re a Bedwetter until high school and depressed. At one point you were taking, according to your book, 16 Xanax a day.
SILVERMAN: It`s true.
BEHAR: Weren`t you comatose with 16 Xanax a day?
SILVERMAN: I must have been a little dead inside. This was prescribed to me by a doctor. She just kept upping it and upping it. This is in the `80s, until I was taking four Xanax four times a day. I remember I kept the pill bottles in a shoe box because I thought to myself, this has -- this has to be wrong.
BEHAR: Now another thing about your history that was interesting to me -- I mean, it`s not funny. It sounds like a joke almost, that your shrink killed himself. Before your appointment. That really annoyed me. Couldn`t he wait until after the appointment?
SILVERMAN: Not only that. I remember, he was a grown-up, obviously, but he had like braces. And I remember thinking, I can`t believe he doesn`t even wait to see how life changes with straight teeth, you know. Not to make light of it. I`m making light of it but --
BEHAR: I see your point.
SILVERMAN: It was New Hampshire in the winter. Pitch black at 4:00 pm. My mom drops me off for my second appointment and I`m waiting and waiting and waiting and waiting, and waiting and waiting. And then the -- it`s like this Victorian house that he shares with a hypnotist on the second floor, who I also went to for bedwetting, to no avail, and the bedwetting hypnotist came down with like crazy, teary, bloodshot eyes and went, Dr. Riley hung himself! And I`m just sitting on the couch like -- this is before cell phones or anything. I don`t know what to do with this information other than I had to just wait for the rest of the hour to be over, for my mom to pick me up.
BEHAR: Now your book came out on Hitler`s birthday. Any coincidence there?
SILVERMAN: No, not at all. It was a lot of research was done and they find people buy books on Hitler`s birthday. It`s a weird -- 4-20 is also like stoner`s holiday. I don`t know why.
BEHAR: OK, we`ll be back with more of Sarah Silverman in a bit.
Some people say breakfast is the most important meal of the day. Of course, those are people who say it`s wonderful to greet the morning with a smile. Needless to say, I`m not one of those people. If you are, there are some unique breakfast foods for you. With me now to tell me all about it is Dana Cowin, editor in chief for "Food And Wine" magazine. OK, Dana, tell me.
DANA COWIN, EDITOR IN CHIEF, FOOD & WINE MAGAZINE: You got breakfast food but you are going to eat it at night. So this might appeal to you. We`re starting with a bagel. It looks like a bagel but it`s actually ice cream. WD50`s Serves this as the first course in his tasting menu. And if you taste it, it looks like a bagel but tastes like the lower east side on a fork.
BEHAR: What do you mean?
COWIN: It`s a little bagel, a little smoked salmon, a little smear of cream cheese and pickled onion. The next thing we have --
BEHAR: Wait a second. It has a fishy taste, like lox.
COWIN: That`s because the lox is alongside. You got the whole idea. It`s a whole breakfast. Then we`ve got cereal milk. Now, I don`t know if you`re the type of kid who you didn`t really want the cereal, but you drank from the bottom of your bowl. Mama Fukoo Milk Bar has made it easier for you.
BEHAR: Mama who? COWIN: Mama Fukoo Milk Bar, makes cereal milk, now this is a sweet milk at the bottom of the bowl. And you`ll try that and you`ll be beezing (ph) around while I tell you about the compost cookie that has cornflakes in it. Do you like that?
BEHAR: It`s pretty good.
COWIN: OK.
BEHAR: Sort of like breast milk with a kick.
COWIN: Yes, I`ll have that for dinner. Now if you want the breast milk with the kick, you have it with the Humphreys Ice Cream right here. They make in San Francisco, it is the secret breakfast ice cream. And you tell me what the secret is when you taste it.
BEHAR: This one here?
COWIN: Yes.
BEHAR: Alcohol.
COWIN: Correct.
BEHAR: What is it?
COWIN: Bourbon.
BEHAR: In the morning?
COWIN: No, you`re supposed to eat this later but get the flavors of breakfast.
BEHAR: Why are you calling it breakfast food if you eat it at night?
COWIN: It`s the flavors. Like we love breakfast the flavors, we want to eat them all day long.
BEHAR: OK, let`s get to this one because this one I have my eye on, what is this.
COWIN: OK, so that -- it`s a compost cookie, which means sort of everything at the kitchen sink -
BEHAR: Yes.
COWIN: One of those things that`s not the sink is a cornflake. It`s sort of like chocolate chip cookies but it`s got a lot of other things thrown in.
BEHAR: Like what?
COWIN: It`s got marshmallows, you`ve got chocolate, you`ve got cornflakes, it`s pretty delicious huh?
BEHAR: Yes, taste good. You could throw it in your pocket. Take it with you everywhere you go.
COWIN: Would this make you want to have breakfast every day?
BEHAR: This whole thing is a little bit like -- I think I would be jumping out of my brazier.
COWIN: That might entice some people.
BEHAR: OK Dana, stick around, we`ll be back in a bit.
(COMMERCIAL BREAK)
BEHAR: I`m back with the very funny Sarah Silverman.
SILVERMAN: Let me tell you something, Joy.
BEHAR: Yes?
BEHAR: Last time I was here I did, like, every show, LETTERMAN, THE VIEW, everything. And this show -- everyone -- like every -- everyone saw me on your show.
BEHAR: Oh, really?
SILVERMAN: Like more than any other show people saw me on this show.
BEHAR: Wow! So we`re more important than LETTERMAN, you`re saying?
SILVERMAN: I guess I am. I mean, I just -- I was, like, wow! Everyone watches your show. I don`t get it. But good for you.
BEHAR: Yes, they do. It`s a very hot show. OK. Yao, like you, Conan O`Brien was a "SATURDAY NIGHT LIVE" alum. Did you know that, I didn`t realize that.
SILVERMAN: Yes.
BEHAR: A long time ago.
SILVERMAN: That`s how he became - that`s how we became, I mean, he, Lorne Michaels knew him from being like this hilarious writer on the show.
BEHAR: Yes you worked there too right? Was Lorne Michaels good to you? Were the guys good to you or was it a guys club?
SILVERMAN: It was still kind of a boys club. It hadn`t been such an incredible, like, woman`s movement, it seems. But it was an incredible experience. I was there with legendary people.
BEHAR: Who were you there with? Who was there at your time?
SILVERMAN: I mean, my time, I was just there one year. I was very peripheral, but it was incredible. It was almost like -- like my favorite year. Where I really got to see so much, you know. I mean, it was Adam Sandler, Chris Farley, Phil Hartman, David Spade, Mike Myers, Julia Sweeney. It was, like --
BEHAR: Two of them are dead.
SILVERMAN: I know.
BEHAR: Chris Farley and Hartman are both dead from that year.
SILVERMAN: Yes, I know.
BEHAR: That`s weird, isn`t it, that they`re both dead? Very strange.
SILVERMAN: Yes. That`s not where I was going with the story, but yes, OK.
BEHAR: After the suicidal shrink. You put me in a deaf head. You know, the other day --
SILVERMAN: Everyone I touch dies.
BEHAR: Now one more thing about "SNL." You write in the book about stabbing Al Franken in the head while at a "SNL." Would you please explain yourself?
SILVERMAN: This is -- OK. I don`t know if you can relate to that kind of, like, when we`re all sitting around a table. They keep very, very sharpened pencils at the ready, you know.
BEHAR: Yes.
SILVERMAN: And I`ve got a pencil in my hand. And I`m like I use to always kind of be leaning back with my feet under here. And I always sat next to Al Franken. And he was kind of like my home base for whatever reason. And it was winter so he had a big Jew-fro grown out. Because that`s what they do, they grow them out in the winter.
BEHAR: Sure.
SILVERMAN: And in my head, I don`t think I thought of this consciously, but almost like the way dogs think in pictures. You know like I just thought, like, I`m going to stab this pencil through his hair.
BEHAR: Uh-huh.
SILVERMAN: But what I did and what people saw was me just go -- and stab him in the temple. Like I misjudged where his hair started and his head stopped or something.
BEHAR: Yes.
SILVERMAN: So you just see me stab a man with a pencil in the temple and him scream and go, like, "what are you --" and I wanted to explain, but one, I didn`t have a good explanation. I mean, it was crazy. And two, I was laughing too hard to talk.
BEHAR: And that man is a senator of the United States.
SILVERMAN: I know. I`m glad I did it then and not now.
BEHAR: Well Sarah thanks for coming on again. Anytime you want to come back you can call me.
SILVERMAN: Thank you.
BEHAR: The book is called "The Bed Wetter: Stories of Courage, Resentment and Pee."
SILVERMAN: You can`t show the front.
BEHAR: I can`t show you because she wrote a word on it.
SILVERMAN: She can`t show you.
BEHAR: But I`ll do it like this.
END
