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Joy Behar Page
Bristol vs. Levi; Snooki`s Smackdown; Celebrities in Trouble
Aired September 10, 2010 - 21:00 ET
THIS IS A RUSH TRANSCRIPT. THIS COPY MAY NOT BE IN ITS FINAL FORM AND MAY BE UPDATED.
UNIDENTIFIED MALE: Tonight on The Joy Behar Show, the bitter battle between Bristol Palin and Levi Johnston heats up as Bristol bans her baby`s daddy from sitting in the "Dancing with the Stars" audience.
And from Mel Gibson palling around with a sheriff to Paris Hilton`s three hours behind bars. We`ll examine the recent surge of celebrity special treatment.
Plus, actor and comedian Denis Leary is on fire. He joins Joy to discuss the president`s sinking poll numbers, furor over the Ground Zero mosque and the final season of "Rescue Me".
That and more starting right now.
JOY BEHAR, HLN HOST: Bristol Palin may have done some dirty dancing with Levi Johnston, but she doesn`t want Levi or his Johnston anywhere near her when she makes her "Dancing with the Stars" appearance.
With me to discuss this and more dish for this week are Joe Levy, editor in chief Maxim magazine; Sheryl Underwood, comedienne; and Caroline Manzo, co-star of "The Real Housewives of New Jersey". Not the fake housewives of New Jersey.
CAROLINE MANZO, "REAL HOUSEWIVES OF NEW JERSEY": I`m as real as you get, so.
BEHAR: You are the real deal, baby right?
Now, why can`t these kids work this out, Joe, Levi and Bristol?
JOE LEVY, EDITOR IN CHIEF, MAXIM MAGAZINE: Well, you know, the amount of attention these two get, you would think they`re the Brad and Angelina of the whirlwind set. I don`t get it. Why are we still talking about them? Why?
BEHAR: Because of Sarah Palin, I think.
LEVY: It is. And the only thing I like about this is the more absurd it gets the more confident I become that she will not be our next president.
BEHAR: Really? You think so? What`s the connection to her being president?
LEVY: I think with this much nonsense, you know, her -- she can`t keep her kids in line. She can`t -- keep the kid off TV. I don`t think it would be good for her.
MANZO: I don`t think it`s her. I think it`s him.
BEHAR: It`s him?
MANZO: It`s definitely Levi.
LEVY: You think it`s his fault.
MANZO: Yes. She is more -- what I see, Bristol is more kind of low key, but he is just all over the map, "Playgirl", now he`s running for the mayor?
BEHAR: Mayor of Wasilla.
MANZO: Like, what are you doing?
BEHAR: He has a 6 percent approval rating.
MANZO: And he can`t control -- right?
BEHAR: Mel Gibson has a higher approval rating.
MANZO: Unbelievable. So, I think he`s the uncontrollable one. They`re just trying to do maybe a little bit of damage control. I don`t know.
LEVY: I think all I need is why turn teen pregnancy into a chance at celebrity.
MANZO: Exactly.
LEVY: It`s a strange thing that seems to be happening all over in American culture right now. You get pregnant as a teenager, boom, you`re on the cover of "Us" magazine.
(CROSSTALK)
SHERYL UNDERWOOD, COMEDIENNE: Is that how you do it?
BEHAR: That has some -- I don`t know.
She says Sheryl that she doesn`t want him to steal the spotlight. She said that in, I don`t know, Pop Eater or something.
UNDERWOOD: What little spotlight she gets, she might as well bring him on so they can get both of them. How is she going to tell somebody they can`t get on when she just got on? She needs him on the show for the controversy and the nastiness.
BEHAR: Well, she doesn`t see it that way. She doesn`t want him stealing her thunder.
UNDERWOOD: Who voted for her?
BEHAR: Well, people out there. She figures she`s going to get out there and dance up a storm and they`re going to say Levi Johnston is in the audience instead of looking at how fabulous she looks.
UNDERWOOD: And then she`ll go trip and fall and she will (INAUDIBLE) -- is that what she`s thinking?
BEHAR: That would help her.
UNDERWOOD: Absolutely.
BEHAR: You know. Everybody who has an accident on that show scores, I think. You know, they faint -- they faint --
(CROSSTALK)
UNDERWOOD: Yes. Marie Osmond.
(CROSSTALK)
LEVY: The biggest success in "Dancing with the Stars" is to trip and hurt yourself.
(CROSSTALK)
BEHAR: Resuscitated her career when she fainted.
UNDERWOOD: You know who I want to see naked -- Rick Fox -- let him be naked on "Dancing with the Stars".
BEHAR: Who?
MANZO: Naked?
BEHAR: Red Fox?
UNDERWOOD: Rick?
UNDERWOOD: You are the new Benny Hanna (ph) if we see Redd Foxx on "Dancing with the Stars".
BEHAR: All right. Let`s talk about Sarah Palin -- we brought her name up. She and Glenn Beck are doing a 9/11 rally in Alaska. And they`re charging up to $200 a ticket. What do you think of that?
LEVY: What better way to commemorate a national tragedy than to turn it into a fund-raiser?
UNDERWOOD: Where`s the money going?
BEHAR: "The Hill" newspaper, which I presume is a very reputable newspaper, they report that there`s indication as to whom or where -- they do not know where the profits will go.
UNDERWOOD: See?
MANZO: Well, that`s the big question. Where is the profits going? Ok. So we may all have egg on our face later in the day when the profits are going for a good cause, number one. Number two, you don`t like it, don`t buy a ticket. Nobody`s got a gun to your head and say buy a ticket. If nobody buys a ticket and shows up, it`s a bust.
UNDERWOOD: How much is a damn ticket?
BEHAR: Up to $225 a ticket.
UNDERWOOD: $225? Who`s going to be there?
BEHAR: The Tea Party.
UNDERWOOD: The Eagles?
BEHAR: Glenn Beck`s, you know, ditto heads.
LEVY: Redd Foxx is opening for the Eagles at this thing.
(CROSSTALK)
MANZO: You had to be in the green room with us for the continuation.
(CROSSTALK)
BEHAR: Who are you referring to?
UNDERWOOD: The Eagles the band. For 200 and some dollars there better be a good band. And they -- there are going to be no fool to get the black people there. You need some chicken wings and a good band.
MANZO: Maybe they`re going to have it.
BEHAR: Maybe some eagle wings.
UNDERWOOD: You`re going to eat an eagle?
BEHAR: There`s apparently going to be a wet area for drinkers and a dry area for non-drinkers. Which area would you be sitting, Sheryl?
MANZO: Oh, we know that answer Sheryl.
UNDERWOOD: I would be supporting my Republican sister Sarah Palin. It would be like, Tripp, what did you do with the other $200?
BEHAR: Are you a Republican, Sheryl?
UNDERWOOD: I`m one of the faux ones that we got.
MANZO: You mean another.
UNDERWOOD: Welcome to the club.
MANZO: I`m not a hardcore Republican, though.
UNDERWOOD: Not me.
MANZO: I kind of lean, too. I lean toward the other way.
UNDERWOOD: I support President Obama, but I know you`ll never--
BEHAR: You`re really a true Republican.
UNDERWOOD: Oh, absolutely. Absolutely. I support whoever our commander in chief is at that time.
MANZO: Well, then you`re not Republican. You`re an independent.
UNDERWOOD: No, no, no, no.
MANZO: You`re not a Republican.
UNDERWOOD: No, I`m a Republican. I am a Barry Goldwater, Ronald Reagan Republican.
BEHAR: They`re dead also. What makes you a Republican, a real Republican?
UNDERWOOD: A true commemoration.
BEHAR: I`d like to know, let`s find out what makes you a Republican.
UNDERWOOD: What makes me a Republican?
BEHAR: Yes.
UNDERWOOD: I think that the business positions that they have in the Republican Party are absolutely correct. I think limited government but necessary government is important. I believe --
BEHAR: All right. I have to move on.
UNDERWOOD: You shouldn`t ask me. You shouldn`t have asked.
BEHAR: We know the rap. You`re basically party-line Republican.
UNDERWOOD: Not for all things. I think we got a lot of nutty people speaking for us, you know.
MANZO: Really?
UNDERWOOD: And now, we`re losing a lot of cool points.
BEHAR: That is shocking.
UNDERWOOD: Some of these people, they`re making George Bush look like a good leader now, the people that are speaking for us. Come back, killer. Come back to the party.
BEHAR: Let`s move on to another leader. Snooki. She was given a verbal smack-down by this judge the other day, sentencing her to community service this week for her drunkenness. Watch.
(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)
JUDGE DAMIAN G. MURRAY, SEASIDE HEIGHTS MUNICIPAL COURT: You seem to be acting like a Lindsay Lohan wannabe in this matter. Going through life rude, profane, obnoxious, and self-indulgent is not the way you want to live your life. And hopefully this incident will impress upon you that there are consequences to your actions.
(END VIDEO CLIP)
BEHAR: Ok. Was that fair of the judge to compare her to Lindsay Lohan?
LEVY: You know, she said Lindsay wannabe, which means that she didn`t have an expletive written anywhere on her fingernails while she was in court.
BEHAR: That`s true.
LEVY: Was it fair? I think it was fair enough. I mean you know the incident. She was falling-down drunk on the beach. Now, her whole sentence has been -- is $500 fine and two days` community service. She had to clean out the cages in a zoo.
BEHAR: Yes.
LEVY: And she had to give a kiss to a camel.
BEHAR: She kissed a camel?
LEVY: She held a Graham cracker in her teeth and the guy at the zoo told her to feed it to the camel, so she will make out with anything.
BEHAR: That`s community -- she`ll make out with anything?
LEVY: She`ll make out with a camel.
BEHAR: I mean that`s community service -- that`s nothing.
LEVY: Well, she had to clean the cages in the --
BEHAR: So what? Big deal?
MANZO: It`s like we reward bad behavior.
BEHAR: Yes.
MANZO: That`s the society we live in now. Let`s reward bad behavior. To me, when he compared her to Lindsay Lohan, for what? For what? That`s cool? It`s not cool.
BEHAR: I have to say --
LEVY: He`s definitely not saying it`s cool. He wasn`t comparing her to Lindsay like awesome, way to go, be Lindsay.
(CROSSTALK)
MANZO: I understand that. But that`s what`s on television.
BEHAR: The "Real Housewives", don`t they do that sort of thing? Have bad behavior and is rewarded.
(CROSSTALK)
MANZO: I don`t defend it. I do not defend it. You know that about me. I don`t defend it.
BEHAR: Right. You break up the fight.
MANZO: The thing is in this society today we reward bad behavior. If that is -- if Snooki was my daughter, she would have done her community service, she would have cleaned some dog poop and she would have a smack in the head when she got home from me. Because that`s not the way to behave.
UNDERWOOD: Don`t be smacking --
MANZO: So don`t compare her to Lindsay Lohan. Say, how are you behaving? It`s this the way you behave as a responsible adult when you`re supposed to be -- I won`t even say it -- they`re trying to make these kids role models.
BEHAR: So you agree with Jerry Lewis, who also would have smacked Lindsay Lohan. There`s a lot of violence.
MANZO: If that was my child, is it violence? No. A smack in the head, wake up?
BEHAR: A smack in the head. It could make them stupid. Let me try this on Joe.
MANZO: I got plenty of smacks in the head and I got of plenty of wooden spoons across my butt growing up and there`s nothing wrong with that.
BEHAR: And look at how perfectly -- look at normal you are. You`re on "The Real Housewives of New Jersey".
MANZO: And you know what? And I am proud of me so, that`s ok.
(CROSSTALK)
UNDERWOOD: By the way, you look exactly like Brenda Vaccaro. Don`t you realize --
BEHAR: Is she alive.
UNDERWOOD: I don`t know. Another dead person.
BEHAR: Everyone you mentioned so far --
UNDERWOOD: Here`s what it is. "The Jersey Shore" show, I tell you people, know how they feel about "Jersey Shore" show. The "Jersey Shore" show I tell you is the way black people felt when "Flavor, Flavor" --
MANZO: Guess what? I`m Italian and I look at those kids and I say you know what, you`re a kid, you`re speaking for yourself. You`re representing yourself.
UNDERWOOD: The world don`t see that. They want to be on the beach drinking --
MANZO: Look, I`m from the same state. I`m Italian. I have children their age. Guess what? They don`t represent my children. They don`t represent me. I don`t represent New Jersey and I don`t represent Italians. I represent me.
Love me or --
UNDERWOOD: You are a good person.
(CROSSTALK)
MANZO: Fine. But some people --
BEHAR: I got to go.
UNDERWOOD: You don`t get on show, you`re not derogatory on the show.
MANZO: Sure I am at times.
UNDERWOOD: Really?
LEVY: We`ll let them continue this.
BEHAR: All right. We have to go. I`m sorry. I represent New Jersey. I just want to say that.
Thanks, everybody. Catch Sheryl Underwood at Caroline`s in New York all weekend. She`s a funny lady.
And you can see Caroline Manzo on Bravo`s "Real Housewives of New Jersey".
Up next, stars getting special treatment from law enforcement is nothing new but the latest surge of Mel, and Paris and Lindsay is starting to getting a little ridiculous. We`ll examine it next.
(COMMERCIAL BREAK)
2110
(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)
JUDGE MURRAY: Going through life rude, profane, obnoxious and self indulgent is not the way you want to live your life.
(END VIDEO CLIP)
BEHAR: So Snooki was sentenced today for drunkenness and being generally annoying. She got two days of community service. I`m guessing it`s not reading to the blind or anybody else for that matter.
But she`s not the only celebrity being annoying. No. Mel Gibson -- surprise, surprise -- is at the center of yet another lawsuit. Remember when he went on an anti-Semitic rant after being busted for DUI? Well, the officer who arrested him is suing L.A. County. He claims he`s a victim of retaliation.
Officer James Mead says he was passed over for a promotion because he was the one to report Gibson`s anti-Semitic remarks. Well, Mel just happens to be a close friend of L.A. County Sheriff, Lee Baca.
So is Officer Mead being passed over just a coincidence or is this just another example of celebrities getting away with bad behavior?
With me now to discuss this and other celebrity injustices are Debra Opri, family law attorney; Jim Moret, attorney and chief correspondent for "Inside Edition"; and Danny Bonaduce, actor and radio talk show host on 94.1 WYSP in Philadelphia.
At the time of his DUI arrest, guys, Gibson was a spokesperson for the L.A. County sheriff`s STAR program and had even filmed PSAs like this one.
Take a look at this.
(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)
MEL GIBSON, ACTOR: Actually I stopped you because I noticed your LASSO sticker. I just wanted to stop you and thank you for your support. Have a nice day, Chachi.
UNIDENTIFIED MALE: I knew you recognized me.
GIBSON: Please join me in supporting the L.A. sheriff`s STAR Organization. Your gifts provide educational opportunities for the children of our fallen deputies.
(END VIDEO CLIP)
BEHAR: Interesting, isn`t it, Jim? I mean, could Mel`s relationship with the police have benefited him following his arrest?
JIM MORET, CHIEF CORRESPONDENT, "INSIDE EDITION": Well, first of all, what a difference a couple of few years makes. And so I don`t think he would be asked to do that today.
BEHAR: I don`t think so.
MORET: Look, I mean and just to be clear, this isn`t a situation of a star being annoying in this particular instance. This is the deputy suing the sheriff`s department basically saying that he was asked to change the report that he originally wrote about Mel Gibson`s alleged anti -- anti- Semitic remarks. And that a video tape taken of Mel Gibson involved in this rant was somehow mysteriously erased.
Do celebrities get special treatment? Yes of course they do. I hate to say otherwise it is ridiculous.
However, the question is, is the treatment that Mel Gibson was given was illegal? Was there something wrong or -- or -- or was this deputy treated unfairly and passed over for promotions because he put something in a report that he was told to take out? That`s the issue here.
BEHAR: Well that`s -- that`s the thing, Danny. I mean, first of all, this officer happens to be Jewish. So he has a little bit of a stake in wanting to report anti-Semitic remarks. Even though if he wasn`t Jewish, he should -- he could do it and should do it anyway, right?
But do you think his -- his -- his claim that he`s being punished for not protecting Mel valid or is it sour grapes, at all?
DANNY BONADUCE, ACTOR: I`m going to have to lean toward sour grapes on this one because I do not believe for a moment that Sheriff Lee Baca -- I had the great pleasure of opening several boxing gyms for street kids to get kids off the street with Sheriff Baca. And he couldn`t be a finer man. And I don`t believe for one second you would get to Sheriff Baca`s position by telling street patrol cops to alter reports.
You`re going to get caught. And everybody knows you`re going to get caught in L.A. They give -- I think there are suing celebrity summer camps. There are symposiums given in Los Angeles on how to sue people. And that officer would have known in a minute. And Sheriff Baca would have known it and you`re going to get caught. I don`t believe that he was asked to alter a police report.
BEHAR: You don`t believe it. How about you Debra? What do you think?
DEBRA OPRI, FAMILY LAW ATTORNEY: Well, Joy, today is your lucky day because I`ve done employment cases, where I`ve represented individuals with the sheriff`s department and it`s a high standard to prove. You have to prove that something was erased, you have to prove that something --
BEHAR: Right.
OPRI: -- was intentionally changed.
What you don`t realize is that just because this officer filed a lawsuit it`s the start of the game. I mean, he`s -- he`s not in Oz anymore. He`s in Malibu. This is a close community. Mel Gibson is loved. He looked terrific in that uniform and while I do not support his antics --
BEHAR: Mel Gibson is loved, by whom?
OPRI: He is loved in the community of Malibu. His friends and supporters there, they haven`t changed their tune.
What Mel Gibson --
BONADUCE: Really Barbara Streisand still likes him?
BEHAR: Have they heard the tapes. Haven`t they heard the tapes in Malibu?
(CROSSTALK)
BONADUCE: I don`t know -- I don`t know Debra.
OPRI: Mel has had some bad boy conduct, but in the end, when push comes to shove, that officer is going to have to have hard evidence: memos, videotapes, witnesses to testify and that close community I can assure you they`re going to close ranks at that sheriff`s office. And if it`s true or not true, it doesn`t matter. It`s what he can prove.
BEHAR: Ok Jim you have the last word and then I`ve got to go. This is a short segment, sorry.
MORET: Look. Debra`s right. You`ve got to prove it. But that doesn`t mean there isn`t evidence to suggest that he was asked by a superior to make an additional report. That`s going to be at the heart of this particular lawsuit.
OPRI: Not necessarily.
BEHAR: Ok guys. Stay there because we`re going continue with this a little bit more on celebrity injustices. Paris Hilton, oh, we have a few more. This is just the beginning.
(COMMERCIAL BREAK)
BEHAR: I`m back with my panel. We`re talking about celebrity bad behavior and special treatment. Mel, and now Paris, ok? They all seem to get special treatment.
Here`s a photo from TMZ showing Paris being arrested in Vegas on cocaine charges. And the police -- Debra, the police admitted they processed her as quickly as possible to avoid any disruptions at the jail. Does that argument hold any weight, or are they really just -- come on.
OPRI: It does because we`re at a point in time where the bottom line is money. What does it cost law enforcement and the court system for the pleasure of their company?
Paris Hilton is expensive. Every time she goes into that police department, into a court house, they have to have extra people with the paparazzi, taking care of her. Same thing with Lindsay Lohan being in a jail cell -- it costs money. So if it takes three hours versus six to process her, God bless them. They`re doing a good job for their system.
BEHAR: But should they admit that? Shouldn`t they keep their mouths shut about that sort of thing?
OPRI: Yes.
BEHAR: About giving her special treatment?
MORET: I think they`re being honest. The fact is that having Paris Hilton in a jail will cause disruption. There`s no question about it. Look at when Lindsay Lohan was in jail and actually when Paris was in jail here in Los Angeles. They were put in solitary at additional expense because the sheriff`s department had to ensure their safety. Because they`re also looking at liability if anything happens to them.
BEHAR: Danny, doesn`t this treatment reinforce that celebrities are getting special treatment, even if it is for convenience or for the fact that they don`t want any more of a hassle than they`re going to get. I mean come on.
BONADUCE: Well, in this case -- in this case, I agree with Debra and Jim that having them in custody is expensive and is a hassle. But on this kind of special treatment, there`s a part we`re leaving out and that is you are arrested at the scene of a crime. You don`t leave the scene of the crime with the alleged evidence.
A police officer taking the purse with the cocaine in it from the scene of the crime into a public arena -- if both the counselors will agree with me -- that`s called the chain of custody. Once they`ve taken the evidence away from the scene of the crime, they`ve lost that chain of custody. So the police actually did some shoddy police work on this one.
And a really good defense attorney might get Paris off. And that -- that is unconscionable because the girl did it and the girl belongs in jail.
BEHAR: It looks also like she has a history of cocaine. Because a former "Girls Gone Wild" employee claims in a new book -- ok, she`s not the greatest person to say this but still -- she says that Paris has smuggled the drug in her vagina.
This is what she wrote. "She held the box in her" -- listen to this - - "She held the box in her right hand and then with an underhand swoop, like a lower case J, she demonstrated exactly how she intended to beat airport security. She even whistled as she did it.
You know, Danny, Paris may not have talent but her vagina sure does.
BONADUCE: I mean, I don`t even want to get into the subject matter of that woman has smuggled in there. But the fact of the matter is it just shows how stupid Paris is. She only has to walk through a metal detector. You don`t have to insert it into a cavity. You can put it in your pocket just don`t wrap it in tin foil.
The woman is -- she should be arrested and kept incarcerated just for our safety.
OPRI: Is that how it`s done, Danny?
BONADUCE: That is, in fact, how it`s done. Listen, you may both be lawyers but I`m an actual defendant.
OPRI: I`m not laughing at you, I`m laughing with you.
BEHAR: Jim, your last words there.
BONADUCE: I`m watching -- Joy, I`m watching my career flash before my eyes right now. So, I`m just --
BEHAR: And mine too and everybody else`s.
OPRI: I do it every day Jim. Don`t worry about it.
BEHAR: Stay with me. We`ll all go down together.
Ok. Thank you guys very much.
(COMMERCIAL BREAK)
BEHAR: Denis Leary began his comedy career in Boston then he moved to New York where I first met him, now he lives in Connecticut. Why he lives in the woods like Ted Kaczynski, I have no idea. But whatever, funny is funny. He is the creator and star of hit FX series "Rescue Me." Which just finished taping its final season. Hey, Denis.
DENIS LEARY, COMEDIAN: Hi.
BEHAR: Thanks for doing this.
LEARY: So you referenced the Unabomber during my intro.
BEHAR: Yes.
LEARY: That`s great, I love that. First time that happened but I like it. I like it.
BEHAR: But I mean are you living in the woods of Connecticut? No.
LEARY: I do, yes, I live in the woods which is -- you know, it`s all about my -- you know, my wife. So --
BEHAR: Why? She`s a --
LEARY: She is a horse person and when the kids were like, I guess 5 and 7, she wanted the kids to live outside the city -
BEHAR: Oh yes.
LEARY: And have that experience with the access to New York so we did that.
BEHAR: Uh-huh.
LEARY: So my father left Ireland because he did not want to muck horse manure for the rest of his life and he wanted to come to New York.
BEHAR: Good idea.
LEARY: So he did. He left Ireland then came to the big city. And I have ended up mucking horse manure. So I`m sure wherever he is, he is laughing his Irish ass off.
BEHAR: We both come from simple backgrounds, you know, simple people.
LEARY: Especially in my case.
BEHAR: No. All of us.
LEARY: And you know simple doesn`t just mean the financial background, yes.
BEHAR: One time I heard these two waspy girls talking while I was working at "GOOD MORNING AMERICA" and I said did you -- are you going back to South Hampton? Well she said, no, mommy closed the house. I said, the last time the family closed the house they left Italy.
LEARY: Yes, actually, my parent`s houses -- are you telling me to push back because I look bad leaning in like that? Someone said to push back. Should I sit on my jacket? No. I know. Mommy. By the way --
BEHAR: Mommy, who says mommy?
LEARY: Who the hell is mummy. Mummy -
BEHAR: That`s very waspy.
LEARY: Mummy is Abbott and Costello movie -
BEHAR: Exactly.
LEARY: At my house it was ma! You know, it`s still that. So -
BEHAR: Right.
LEARY: I lived in a basement -- I started in an attic. My parents lived in a three decker apartment and my brother --
BEHAR: In a what?
LEARY: In an attic, a three decker.
BEHAR: A three decker, a three stories?
LEARY: Three decker is like wooden buildings and -- well, they have them in queens but we used to have them in Boston where I`m from so they`re like apartment buildings next door to each other. They are built out of wood.
BEHAR: I see.
LEARY: So we lived on the third floor. And my brother and I lived in the attic which was great because --
BEHAR: So we can smoke pot up there.
LEARY: We could do anything. They literally didn`t want to come up the stairs. They would scream up the stairs, stop that noise! They would never come up, right. And then they moved to the house my mother still lives in. And my brother and I were in the basement like rats next to the water heater and literally a room the size of this desk. And we had access to the alley and our own refrigerator. So you can imagine how much -- well, you know, not very good stuff went on there. There were kids that would literally escape their parents and stay at our house for like a month. And like my parents didn`t even know they were in the basement. I`m sorry. I`m sitting the wrong way.
BEHAR: You`re doing great. Now you know, let`s talk about a couple of things going on in the news.
LEARY: OK.
BEHAR: I mean I want to talk to you about your show because I watched the finale this weekend, which was very, very good.
LEARY: You did? What did you think?
BEHAR: I thought it was very compelling, very compelling. And your character is great. Everybody`s fantastic. Very profound, the show.
LEARY: Wow, thanks.
BEHAR: It`s good.
LEARY: Thanks. Profound.
BEHAR: Yes. But I want to ask you. There`s a crazy story coming out of Florida --
LEARY: Oh, yes I saw this guy.
BEHAR: He`s trying to mark 9/11 by burning these various Korans, copies of the original Koran. Let`s listen to this.
(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)
PASTOR TERRY JONES, DOVE OUTREACH WORLD CENTER: We first declared September the 11th international burn a Koran day. Actually, for two reasons. Number one, we wanted to remember those who were brutally murdered on September the 11th and actually wanted to send a very clear message to the radical element Of Islam, we wanted to send a very clear message to them that we are not interested in their Sharia law.
(END VIDEO CLIP)
BEHAR: The Sharia Law is the -- you know, the beheadings and the --
LEARY: Oh, OK.
BEHAR: That part of Islam --
LEARY: Right. First of all, the guy -- I`m a -- I was raised catholic.
BEHAR: Yes, as was I.
LEARY: I`m lapse Catholic now.
BEHAR: We all are.
(LAUGHTER)
LEARY: I hate organized religion. I`m sure you have touched on this subject during the course of the last two weeks. But so, anyways, I think I`m tweeted about this guy like a week and a half ago. He looks like the pastor on "SONS of ANARCHY." That show. The motorcycle show.
BEHAR: Really.
LEARY: Doesn`t he look like he runs like a motorcycle gang church. But this is the stuff where you start to get into -- I don`t know. It`s such a nebulous area. Like I believe in freedom, I believe in separation of church and brain. First of all -
BEHAR: Right.
LEARY: That`s due to Sarah Palin primarily.
BEHAR: Oh, yes.
LEARY: But I really believe the reason the founding fathers separated the church and the state so that we would have this argument, you know, sort of separated by law. And people have the right, of course; to say whatever they want and to believe in whatever they want.
BEHAR: Right.
LEARY: There`s that and as the president the wisdom or I like to call the common sense of, yes, you have the right to do something but does it make sense? So in the case of the 9/11 situation with the mosque, I look at it like --
BEHAR: Oh the mosque and burning the Koran. Those are two separate topics.
LEARY: He has the right to do whatever he wants.
BEHAR: Right.
LEARLY: Then there`s the common sense aspect of which is the week of, you know, the ninth anniversary of this thing, you know, he`s turning it into his own issue.
BEHAR: Well Petraeus is saying, you know, General Petraeus --
LEARY: Yes, well that`s true -
BEHAR: That it puts the troops in harm`s way type of thing.
LEARY: True.
BEHAR: That he was saying that those Wiki leaks put the troops in harm`s way and now his too.
LEARY: I agree with that as well.
BEHAR: I - too.
LEARY: But I`m more interested and appalled by the xenophobic aspect of it, which is a big word. Big word.
BEHAR: But you are sitting correctly. So it`s not -
LEARY: I`m sitting correctly and I`m saying xenophobia. Which by the way I know the meaning of. But my parents were immigrants, Irish immigrants. And they were illegal aliens for awhile -
BEHAR: Sure.
LEARY: Before they became actual citizens so the whole idea about the immigrants and just all sort of relates into the same sort of, you know, crazy patriotic ball that they have going of, you know, nobody else should come to this country. No other religions besides the one I believe in and --
BEHAR: But when someone says something like that, why do they not have to pay taxes? These kinds of people should not be tax exempt. Because they`re not a religion.
LEARY: Oh this guy in particular you mean?
BEHAR: Yes. I mean he has been getting partial tax exemption because of the things he`s been saying only partial, but even partial, I don`t get it.
LEARY: I think he should be because of the mustache. I mean that`s a lot of upkeep.
BEHAR: Exactly.
LEARY: You know, listen, the Catholic Church actually stepped in on this mosque situation.
BEHAR: They should really stay out.
LEARY: But when the Catholic Church is coming in to help you decide on something -
BEHAR: Yes.
LEARY: You know you`re in trouble. I don`t care which side of the argument you are on. Get the hell away.
BEHAR: I know.
LEARY: The Catholic Church is coming in and they`re actually trying to make sense out of it. You`re in trouble, you know.
BEHAR: I mean really, with their track record, the past few years, forget about it.
LEARY: Yes, I, just -- you know.
BEHAR: But you know, last time I spoke to you -- you were really obsessed with Obama and now the polls are showing that he`s getting -- people don`t want him to be president as much as they used to.
LEARY: You know what he needs to do, he needs to turn white. That`s what he really needs to do. Yes.
BEHAR: Why? Do you think it`s about race?
LEARY: White republican.
BEHAR: Do you think it`s about race?
LEARY: I think part about race.
BEHAR: Really?
LEARY: Really. The real problem is this.
BEHAR: I don`t know.
LEARY: This country has a -- well, I guess the world has a gigantic case of A.D.D. going on.
BEHAR: Right and amnesia.
LEARY: I mean it`s amazing, how long he`s been in office?
BEHAR: Uh, 18 months, 19 months, something like that. Almost two years.
LEARY: Not even two years. And this economic situation, the official falling apart was like in the election which was October of 2008. Right?
BEHAR: Yes, yes.
LEARY: So this -- who else was going to fix it? John McCain would fix it?
BEHAR: That`s the thing. When you say that to people, what if it were McCain and Palin now? What kind of deep doodie --
LEARY: Oh my god, can you imagine, Sarah Palin.
BEHAR: But nobody cares about what could have been and only care with what is and they don`t care with what happened either.
LEARY: There`s a lot of people financially hurting. And I understand that aspect of it like -- in terms of getting a job or fixing their financial situation.
BEHAR: Right.
LEARY: Whatever it might be. Getting - paying for the kids in college but you have to have a little bit of patience. Nobody`s going to fix this thing. Remember the Ronald Reagan trickle down economics.
BEHAR: Yes, trickle this.
LEARY: Yes, once he started. It didn`t trickle down to me until like `94.
BEHAR: No, me either.
LEARY: The guy was doddering at a park bench -
BEHAR: Exactly.
LEARY: You get Alzheimer`s. And I just got my first credit card. I was like 34 years old. So, you know, I mean --
BEHAR: It is true.
LEARY: So I mean, you really have to give it sometime. It took 14 years for Reagan to reach me.
BEHAR: Yes, what about the canonization of Reagan now? Whenever a republican speaks it is saint Ronald Reagan, I mean, come on.
LEARY: I know, I know, listen I`m so happy to have a president who can actually, still, no matter what you say express himself and smart.
BEHAR: And articulate.
LEARY: And articulate OK?
BEHAR: Yes.
LEARY: George Bush, whatever you think of George Bush, last week he did a charity golf event for a great cause for vets and their children.
BEHAR: Yes.
LEARY: And it`s the first time he`s really been on television in a while.
BEHAR: Yes.
LEARY: And they showed him --
BEHAR: Did you miss him?
LEARY: Yes I miss him a lot, comedy wise I do.
BEHAR: Oh my god.
LEARY: I really miss him. I really miss him.
BEHAR: You know I stopped doing stand-up when he got out of office.
LEARY: Did you really.
BEHAR: Because it wasn`t fun anymore. All you had to do is quote him. I`m happy to shake the hand of a soldier whose hand was cut off by Saddam Hussein? I mean come on, you can`t write it.
LEARY: It`s pretty unbelievable.
BEHAR: Yes.
LEARY: It`s pretty unbelievable. It`s pretty endless, too. How about the time he went to open the door? That was one of my favorites of all time. The guy was great. As a comedy president.
BEHAR: Oh I know.
LEARY: He was fantastic.
BEHAR: All right Denis, we are just getting started again.
LEARY: Don`t be fooled again. That was one of my favorite moments --
BEHAR: How does it go?
LEARY: It goes, fool me once, shame on you. I can`t say it.
BEHAR: He couldn`t well, he couldn`t either.
LEARY: Yes.
BEHAR: We`ll be right back more -- with more - from Denis Leary.
LEARY: What happened? Commercial?
BEHAR: Don`t go anywhere, commercial, commercial, baby.
(COMMERCIAL BREAK)
(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)
UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: Every time I try to call you to talk about booze or an urge to drink or something about recovery, you not only don`t pick you don`t call me back or text.
LEARY: I can`t text. My fingers are too big. You know I tried typing in what`s going on, and it sent out a text saying -- I can`t do it.
(END VIDEO CLIP)
BEHAR: That`s a clip from the hit FX show "RESCUE ME." finale of last week and the next season will be its last.
LEARY: The finale which was called "profound and compelling" by Joy Behar.
BEHAR: It is. And if you want to catch up, season five available now.
LEARY: Yes, it is. Can I say one thing though, there`s a show on after us this year which is also done by another comedian friend of ours, Louis C.K.
BEHAR: Oh yes.
LEARY: Oh my god, what a great show.
BEHAR: It`s funny.
LEARY: It`s a hilarious show.
BEHAR: That one with that Brit? What is his name?
LEARY: Ricky Gervais.
BEHAR: Gervais. Don`t tag me on the floor.
LEARY: Yes, it`s a great show.
BEHAR: Very funny.
LEARY: It`s a great show. So I`m pushing another guy`s show now.
BEHAR: That`s all right.
LEARY: OK. I`m calling George Bush an idiot. I`m here instead of pushing my show, I`m pushing Louis C.K.`s show.
BEHAR: Oh well let`s talk about your show. OK?
LEARY: Yes.
BEHAR: Louis was on talking about his show.
LEARY: He was?
BEHAR: How come you aren`t going to past the next year?
LEARY: Well, because -- you know, I don`t know. This is the first time I`ve done a successful television series. The first one I did lasted 19 --
BEHAR: What was it?
LEARY: "THE JOB." But it was my same creative partner, which is Peter Tolan. Peter did "LARRY SANDERS SHOW," and he also worked on "MURPHY BROWN." So Peter`s whole thing was, listen, I feel like five to seven years is the amount of time that you should have a television show and then get out. Always leave the audience wanting more and goes back to the comedy days and he was an ex-stand-up comic.
BEHAR: Uh huh, right.
LEARY: And once he said that about four years ago I said, you know what, I think it`s true. I think we`ll get out when we feel like we`re ready and also before the audience hopefully feels like we`re ready and the tenth anniversary of 9/11. The show`s connected to that.
BEHAR: And your season finale next year is going to be shown on 9/11?
LEARY: No it`s like the week before.
BEHAR: No, the week before.
LEARY: So it just kind of felt right, and creatively, we are still editing that last season now which will air next summer so I feel like it`s right thing --
BEHAR: You mean it is in the can already?
LEARY: So we`ve shot it already, yes.
BEHAR: So what will you do with your time then?
LEARY: Well I`m doing --
BEHAR: Stand-up?
LEARY: "Ace Age 4" tomorrow.
BEHAR: I`m in that.
LEARY: Are you really?
BEHAR: I`m playing John Leguizamo`s mother.
LEARY: Are you really?
BEHAR: I`m serious.
LEARY: Welcome to the cast.
BEHAR: Thank you.
LEARY: And we`re in 3d.
BEHAR: OK. I don`t know what animal I am. I`m not sure yet.
LEARY: Oh really.
BEHAR: Yes, I have to see the script. Anyway, that`s another story. Do you want to hear from actual firefighters?
LEARY: Yes. They work on the show.
BEHAR: And what do they say about the show?
LEARY: Well there`s a lot of firefighters in New York, especially some of the older guys who don`t - who feel like we`ve released some secrets into the world. And --
BEHAR: Like what?
LEARY: Well, you know, we do a very complicated show.
BEHAR: I do watch.
LEARY: I`m sure you`re aware of it, you know, it`s a story about men and the thing that we wanted to write about is what -- how difficult it is to be a supposed hero in what you do and deal with life and death every second of every day.
BEHAR: That`s right.
LEARY: And then that you are on the job and try to deal with real life. So, we`re not interested in the third watch or, you know, that all show emergency -like just pure hero worship.
BEHAR: Right.
LEARY: We were interested in --
BEHAR: The real.
LEARY: Yes.
BEHAR: The real.
LEARY: The dark side of it. You know? And what goes on. Most fire houses I know that are very busy, in any city, it`s what they do for a living and very black humor which is how they deal with the emotions and what they see on the job.
BEHAR: Yes.
LEARY: So, there`s a lot of firefighters who don`t necessarily like us showing that but you know what? We were -- we were true and most of our stories by the way came from actual firefighters who are the technical advisers on the show.
BEHAR: Nobody ever likes it when you know that. I mean nurse Jackie gets flack from nurses.
LEARY: I know -
BEHAR: It`s a satire.
LEARY: And I did that cop show. You know what I find, it is really funny. The only -- I did a couple of gangster films in my movie career and one called "Monument Ave" it was about Irish gangster stuff that I did with Ted Demme. Gangsters are the only guys who are really happy if you show it, you know, show them in a bad light, then they come up to you like --
BEHAR: Yes, yes, that`s true.
LEARY: Hey that was pretty good showing me shooting that guy. Not me but you know what I`m talking about. Like they`re the only ones who are proud, everybody else is like what are you showing that for? You know - so, and my mother. My mother who just that can`t believe I`m doing any of this or saying this. I love her approach to my whole career.
BEHAR: Why what is it?
LEARY: It`s "Ice Age" and nothing else. That`s like -
BEHAR: You only did that.
LEARY: She doesn`t watch anything I do. And she constantly - whenever -- I just did another comedy tour and whenever I do that, I don`t know where you learned that language. Yes, I wonder where. My father could swear in Gaelic and English, by the way, ladies and gentlemen.
BEHAR: Now let me start something for you, OK,
LEARY: Yes.
BEHAR: The Leary Firefighters Foundation --
LEARY: Yes.
BEHAR: No there`s a Comedy Central benefit coming up?
LEARY: Yes. We went on tour. The last few years, I think I deal it next year. I took Lenny Clark and Adam Ferrer who are in the cast of "RESCUE ME."
BEHAR: Yes, I saw that.
LEARY: Yes so instead of doing a press tour we toured the country and do live stand-up and we publicize the show`s arrival back on television every year that way. And it benefits, part of the proceeds to the foundation. So this year, we filmed it at the end here in New York at town hall and I think it is in January on Comedy Central.
BEHAR: That is great.
LEARY: I don`t think I can say the title here.
BEHAR: Why not? Say it, we`ll bleep it.
LEARY: It`s called "DOUCHE BAGS AND DOUGHNUTS." Denis Leary --
BEHAR: Oh we can - we are not even going to bleep that, I don`t think.
LEARY: Oh OK, Denis Leary and friends for the Leary -
BEHAR: The language you get away with on "RESCUE ME" is really incredible. Because it is FX, it`s not HBO. The language is out there.
LEARY: No, well the behavior, too. That`s the thing --
BEHAR: Behavior, too. But the language. I mean I was surprised. You don`t have a seven-second delay or anything. It`s in the script.
LEARY: Yes, I love that network. I got to say that --
BEHAR: They treat you good, huh?
LEARY: Those guys are great.
BEHAR: Now your kid, your daughter -- now, in the show -- your daughter is an alcoholic in the show and you are an alcoholic and you`re her sponsor. You don`t show up when you`re supposed to. You are like a bad father in the movie, in the play or the show.
LEARY: Well, he is terrible.
BEHAR: He`s not good.
LEARY: He is complicated. Yes, but he has not been a great dad which is part of -- hopefully part of what`s exciting for the audience is to figure out in the final season whether or not he can regain his standing with his family.
BEHAR: Who did you draw for that? On what?
LEARY: He`s based on two guys who I know. One guy who doesn`t have a drinking problem and another guy who did. And, and all the elements of the marital problems and all those things are sort of drawn from that.
BEHAR: So it is the drinking problem that makes him kind of a screw- up?
LEARY: Well I don`t know if it`s that. I guess that`s the external expression of it but the real problem, of course, was 9/11 and the loss.
BEHAR: The trauma.
LEARY: And the trauma and not dealing with it. You know? So for firefighters, you know, for anybody with soldiers same thing. It`s that thing of if they`re going into battle, it is difficult to come to terms with --
BEHAR: Right.
LEARY: -- what they have seen, may see again and keep doing the job. You know?
BEHAR: OK, stay with me.
LEARY: I`m not going anywhere. I`m not leaving you.
BEHAR: We`ll be right back with Denis Leary.
(COMMERCIAL BREAK)
BEHAR: I`m back with Denis Leary. You know, Denis, a friend of ours, comedian Robert Schimmel -
LEARY: Yes.
BEHAR: died over the weekend from injuries suffered in a car wreck. And he had - this guy had more severs than Job.
LEARY: His life -- unbelievable. You know, his, oh, god. His battles alone with cancer and by the way if you saw him do the stand-up based on --
BEHAR: I know but let`s show a clip of him on the show. He was on this show. Let`s show it to remember him. He was a great guy.
(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)
ROBERT SCHIMMEL, COMEDIAN: You know, when you are in the hospital and your family and your -- your friends come to see you, they don`t know what to think. And I`ll tell you what they think. They open the door and they`re facing their own mortality. You represent exactly the thing that scares them the most.
BEHAR: That`s right.
SCHIMMEL: And I think if you find humor in it, then you let them off the hook emotionally and they can be themselves around you instead of walking on egg shells.
(END VIDEO CLIP)
BEHAR: He found humor -- I mean, this guy, his son died a child.
LEARY: Yes he did, yes.
BEHAR: I mean the worst thing that could happen to you.
LEARY: I remember that.
BEHAR: He had a heart attack. He had cancer. He had hepatitis C. His parents survived the holocaust. He put all of that aggravation and tragedy into his comedy act which I admire so much. I mean it makes you feel as a comedian you are doing something that`s -- I don`t know. I don`t even know how to explain it.
LEARY: Well I think he was one of the confessional guys like -- he had that Richard Pryor thing. He did a show with us we do every year called "Comics Come Home to Boston," which benefits the Cam Neely`s foundation. Now that obviously was the cause. He was the first guy that came to that show, like 8,000 people. That had that came out with a ten- minute set about having cancer.
BEHAR: Yes.
LEARY: And it was -- I`m telling you fall as I`m sure -- you`re crying the end of it and talking about how he almost died and he opens with it and the entire set`s about it and closes with it. So like Richard Pryor he had that ability to take whatever happened to him and bring it right on stage.
BEHAR: But I mean to talk about your dead child I think is unbelievable.
LEARY: Amazing comedian.
BEHAR: Amazing that he was able to do that.
LEARY: I was really kind of -- kind of shocked. I know it sounds strange because of everything he`s been through. I really didn`t think that Robert Schimmel was going to die. I didn`t think anything was going to kill him.
BEHAR: Well he was ill anyway.
LEARY: I know but I mean he had overcome it so much.
BEHAR: He was going to go anyway. Since --
LEARY: Terrible.
BEHAR: OK let`s do some twitter questions of you. A couple of them. I can`t believe someone wrote this. I didn`t -- I have no control over these. How has being an a-hole made your life better? I swear someone tweeted that.
LEARY: I have to say that the -- that the (EXPLICATIVE DELETED) song -- I mean, we wrote it to be the opening of "No Cure For Cancer." if I don`t play that song in a live appearance, people are very angry.
BEHAR: They want it.
LEARY: I have to play it. Either at the beginning of the set or end of the set, 20 years later -- when I say it will say writer of the a-hole song.
BEHAR: OK 30 seconds. Does your wife watch your sex scenes on "RESCUE ME"? Yes or no?
LEARY: My wife does not watch the show because -- I don`t know why.
BEHAR: OK, did you ever think your career would last this long?
LEARY: No, I didn`t think I would still be alive.
BEHAR: Do you color your hair?
LEARY: Do I color my hair, no, I don`t. This is kind of in the summertime.
BEHAR: He`s a blond. Where do you stand with god? In five seconds.
LEARY: In five seconds, god is a huge fan of the a-hole song. It is my own opinion.
BEHAR: OK thanks, Denis. Thank you Denis.
LEARY: It`s my own opinion.
(LAUGHTER)
BEHAR: Always a pleasure to see you.
LEARY: Is that it.
BEHAR: Make sure to get season five of "RESCUE ME" out now on DVD and catch the upcoming Comedy Central special "DOUCHE BAGS AND DOUGHNUTS." Benefiting the Leary Fire Fighter`s Foundation. Good night everybody.
LEARY: I just love that title.
(LAUGHTER)
END
