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Joy Behar Page
Sheen Rants; Oscar Recap
Aired February 28, 2011 - 22:00 ET
THIS IS A RUSH TRANSCRIPT. THIS COPY MAY NOT BE IN ITS FINAL FORM AND MAY BE UPDATED.
JOY BEHAR, HOST: One of my favorite people of all time is on the show tonight and you`ll never guess who it is.
CHARO, ACTRESS: No, no, no. Un momento. No, no, no. Bend your knee, be proud, straight your back and do it.
Precisely.
UNIDENTIFIED MALE: Coming up on THE JOY BEHAR SHOW, Charlie Sheen declares war on his employers saying he`ll sue CBS for taking away his livelihood.
Sheen claims he`s clean, so is he in denial or just delusional? And could this be the end of "Two and a Half Men"?
Then film, fashion and F-bombs; but was Hollywood`s night to remember a night to forget? Joy has all the highlights and lowlights from the Oscars.
Plus, Charo takes on Lady Gaga. The sassy sexpot tells Joy why she thinks Gaga has gone from Madonna inspiration to Madonna imitation.
That and more starting right now.
BEHAR: When he`s not drinking, drugging or carrying on with hookers, Charlie Sheen likes to make the morning talk show rounds and threaten lawsuits against CBS. You know, I don`t know how he has that kind of energy. He must be on something.
Here`s part of his interview from ABC News. Let`s watch.
(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)
ANDREA CANNING, ABC NEWS: Are you going to see?
CHARLIE SHEEN, ACTOR: Well, I mean wouldn`t you? I don`t have a job. I got a whole family to support and love and people beyond myself; people a lot more important than me are relying on that money to feel the magic.
CANNING: What are you going to sue for?
SHEEN: Tons. They`re going to ask you to put on a scale, like a little more, a little more. Add some gold, add some gold. Bingo, I`m going to collect, you know. And they`re going to lose.
(END VIDEO CLIP)
BEHAR: Here now to discuss this and some of the other magic moments of Sheen`s interview is Andrea Canning, who interviewed Sheen for ABC News.
Hey Andrea. Good to have you here.
CANNING: Hi Joy.
BEHAR: I love when he said, he`s out of a job. It`s not exactly cause for me of (INAUDIBLE).
Canning: He lives big and he said he`s trying to move his two exes, Denise Richards and Brooke Mueller into his neighborhood. So he`s trying to buy them each a house and we`re talking about a very, very nice neighborhood.
So even for someone like that who has a lot of money, when you live large, things cost a lot.
BEHAR: I wonder why do they stick with him? You know? I mean not that Denise is sticking with him but she won`t bad mouth him. And the other one, Brooke Mueller, didn`t he put a knife to her throat? She`s still hanging around. I guess everybody has her price.
CANNING: You know, first of all, he denies putting the knife to her throat, but Brooke Mueller is -- the twins are living with him, they`re twins. The boys are turning three next month.
When we were there, we asked where she was and he said he didn`t know. He seems to be the primary care giver right now. I`m sure he`s paying alimony obviously to these women.
BEHAR: Right. Right.
CANNING: You know, I don`t know if Denise Richards -- is she working right now? I don`t know. So maybe it`s a source of funds for them too.
BEHAR: I don`t know. I don`t know.
They sort of stepped into craziness, I think, those two women. But anyway, he`s rather amusing though, I have to say.
CANNING: He`s hilarious.
BEHAR: He`s very funny. I mean he`s not like Mel Gibson and his ranting which was really irritating and annoying and -- although I can`t get enough. What kind of man is that?
Anyway, let`s talk about the allegation of anti-Semitism, which is an interesting part of this whole thing. He made this comment about "Two and a Half Men`s" creator -- ok -- he says, "There`s nothing this side of deplorable that a certain Chaim Levine -- yes that`s Chuck`s real name -- mistook this rock star of his own selfish exit strategy, bro."
Ok, first of all the guy`s name is Chuck Lorre but his real name is, I guess Chaim Levine --
CANNING: It`s Charles Levine. And what happened was --
BEHAR: So what`s the Chaim, where did he come up with that one?
CANNING: Haim is the Hebrew version and Chuck Lorre likes to put messages in the closing credits of "Two and a Half Men".
BEHAR: I know -- which annoy Charlie.
CANNING: So Chuck put in the credits, Chaim Levine --
BEHAR: Oh, he did.
CANNING: And we`ve seen it. So we know it exists. Charlie said, he thought that was a joke and that was part of his joke, taking Chaim Levine to expose the real man.
BEHAR: I see.
CANNING: So that`s where he is coming from. He says he`s not, there`s no anti-Semitism here. That it`s never been in his history. He stepped into it without knowing what he was really talking about.
BEHAR: I see. So he picked up the name from something that Chuck Lorre already put out there.
CANNING: Had written himself.
BEHAR: But I mean, why would he even say that? Why not say, you know, there`s nothing this side of deplorable that a certain Chuck Lorre -- you know what I mean?
CANNING: He thought he was exposing the real man.
BEHAR: Oh, I see.
CANNING: The real -- the real man.
BEHAR: All right. Well, let`s look at how he dealt with the allegation of anti-Semitism in the interview with ABC News. Let`s watch this.
(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)
SHEEN: They were like suddenly labeling me an anti-Semite. And it`s like, people that know me -- there`s nothing about that in my history anywhere.
I`m sorry if I offended you, I didn`t know you were so sensitive. Sorry if I offended you. I just thought, you know, after you wailing on me for eight years that I could like take a few shots back. Didn`t know you were going to take your little ball and go home and punish everybody in the process.
(END VIDEO CLIP)
BEHAR: Ok. I hear that he -- Mel Gibson called him. Is that a coincidence?
CANNING: You know, what kind of advice? And he said, you know, from these actors who called him, there was no real advice. It was of love.
BEHAR: But why Mel Gibson? What, he`d take a little time off from the meeting. Were his goddesses there? The porn star and the ex-nanny marijuana model?
CANNING: They sure were. We really got to see how these people live. These two goddesses; one is a porn star, one is a former nanny and they say they`re in love with him. He`s in love with them.
BEHAR: Oh, that`s so beautiful Andrea. That touches my heart.
CANNING: And they take care of the children.
(CROSSTALK)
BEHAR: He suggested to TMZ today that your interview clips were planted -- did you know that?
CANNING: Right. Yes. We knew that.
BEHAR: How do you respond to that?
CANNING: I think that we went very in depth with him, 90 minutes of interview. The other network was a lot shorter. And we really got into his past life. And I don`t believe for one second it was slanted. We aired his piece, the two pieces that we aired; there was almost no voice in there at all. It was uncut. This was just a back and forth between us. I don`t know how that`s planted.
BEHAR: Maybe he`s a little paranoid.
CANNING: Maybe, I don`t know.
BEHAR: I mean in a good way, paranoid.
CANNING: You know, we`re not out to spin. We`re not out to get Charlie Sheen. We just wanted to hear his side of the story. That`s why he chose us in the first place because he thought we were fair.
BEHAR: Thank you very much for sharing the whole thing with me. It was great.
Charlie Sheen was so adamant about his sobriety he volunteered to take a drug test for RadarOnline. Watch.
(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)
DYLAN HOWARD, RADARONLINE: SHEEN: You`re in a position to analyze. If we could have a little of the results here, those lines -- there are indeed lines and that means that the test has come back negative, which is as Charlie attested to me.
SHEEN: It was a little surreal because it had an epic undertone about it. I don`t think it`s ever been done before; no it hasn`t. We have done something that we can claim to be completely original, which excites me, which puts me in the zone of winning.
(END VIDEO CLIP)
BEHAR: Here with me now is the man who stood by Sheen as he was tested, Dylan Howard, senior executive editor of RadarOnline. And also joining us is Dr. Reef Karim, addiction specialist, psychiatrist and director of the Control Center in Beverly Hills.
Welcome to the show guys.
Dylan, what did you test for and were you surprised he passed?
HOWARD: Well, I think a lot of people were surprised Joy. Thanks for having us on the program. We tested for all in all, there were three tests. Let`s break this down: two urine; one was an over the counter test which would provide an instantaneous result in which he passed. He took that test on Saturday.
Then we had a court certified laboratory come in and take blood from Charlie Sheen`s left arm, three vials. We sent that off to the lab on Saturday night. The results came back in late last night. We revealed this morning. He was tested for 10 different drugs through the blood including methamphetamine, cocaine, cannabis, opiates, antidepressants, alcohol and so on, and he returned negative for all 10 of those.
The urine was also sampled and he passed all those, too.
BEHAR: Ok. So Dr. Karim, even though that test came negative, it seems like he`s still on drugs because he`s rambling and incoherent at times. How do you explain that?
DR. REEF KARIM, DIRECTOR, THE CONTROL CENTER: Well, first off, in my business, drug testing is a huge part of accountability. And the fact that somebody has a negative drug test doesn`t necessarily mean they have a negative drug test. That`s the first thing. There`s threshold screens that you have.
Like, you have to have a certain amount of drug in your system to get a test considered positive. It still means, you could have some drug in your system, just not at the level that the test is looking for.
BEHAR: I see, I see.
KARIM: Secondly -- yes and then also, the test is about, you know, for cocaine. Cocaine is metabolized about one to three days. So you could have a way, crazy party bender four days ago and then know you`re going to be tested at some point and then three days later, you test negative for a test.
And then there`s all sorts of McGyver contraptions that people will do to try to pass the test, especially I don`t know if this one was supervised --
BEHAR: McGyver?
KARIM: -- but especially -- yes.
BEHAR: What did you say?
KARIM: Remember the show "McGyver"?
BEHAR: Yes.
KARIM: All those crazy contraptions -- listen, I have patients that will set up tubes, IV bags, they`ll scotch tape them to their body, they`ll put them in all sorts of parts of their body to be able to pass a test.
BEHAR: Yes.
KARIM: I`m not saying he`s doing that but I`m saying a negative drug test doesn`t always mean a negative drug test.
BEHAR: Right.
KARIM: The great question here is that anybody who`s seen these interviews is like what is going on right now because this looks like somebody under the influence of drugs. And when you`re dealing with addiction, you`re dealing with the raw aspect of addiction. Are you using, are you not using? Are there drugs in your system, are they not? But you`re also looking at addictive behaviors.
The whole concept of addiction is not just, "Am I using a drug" -- it`s the narcissism, the denial --
BEHAR: Right.
KARIM: -- the blame --
(CROSSTALK)
BEHAR: Well, there`s a lot of egomaniacal statements that he`s made. A lot of the videos I`ve been --
He`s very, very egomaniacal also. So you know, he`s a --
KARIM: Yes.
BEHAR: But you know what? Dylan, he blasted AA and is getting sober using another -- another method. What is his beef with -- with AA, Alcoholics Anonymous?
HOWARD: He says that they have a low percentage rate of success, five percent. He doesn`t believe in their methods. I asked him whether or not he considers himself sober. He said that`s an AA phrase, he doesn`t believe it.
I asked him whether he was an addict. He said I`m not an addict. I then said, your father Martin Sheen from "West Wing" fame went on Britain Sky News last week and said, you`re an addict and he likened it to cancer.
BEHAR: I know.
HOWARD: In which he said shut it-- shut it, pops. He said, you know go and walk through a cancer ward --
(CROSS TALK)
BEHAR: Yes.
HOWARD: -- and see what happens. You won`t find me there.
BEHAR: Ok, all right. That was very interesting. Thank you very much guys.
And for more ABC -- more of ABC`s interview with Charlie Sheen, watch "GOOD MORNING AMERICA" tomorrow. We`ll be --
(COMMERCIAL BREAK)
BEHAR: Charlie Sheen has seemingly talked to everybody this weekend, but the whole media blitz kicked off when the actor went on his friend Alex Jones` radio show, listen --
(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)
CHARLIE SHEEN, ACTOR: I`m so tired of pretending like my life isn`t perfect and bitching and just winning every second. And I`m not perfect in bitching and to delivering the goods at every freaking turn because look what I`m dealing with now, I`m dealing with fools and trolls.
(END VIDEO CLIP)
BEHAR: With me here right now is Alex Jones, a friend of Charlie Sheen`s and the host of "The Alex Jones Radio Show". Alex, you talked to Sheen a couple of hours ago I hear. So give me an exclusive. Come on, what did he say?
ALEX JONES, FRIEND OF CHARLIE SHEEN: Well, he said I`m at war and that he`s not going to be basically run over anymore and that he`s standing up to CBS and Chuck Lorre.
BEHAR: He`s at war with the -- with the network?
JONES: He`s at war with the people there because out of the blue a month ago, they told him, don`t criticize this decision to cut the first four of the eight and now, they`ve cut all eight episodes. And then Chuck Lorre began to put these vanity cards on "Two and a Half Men" and these other two shows saying Charlie was dead inside. He was a dead person. That he was going to live longer than him and --
(CROSS TALK)
BEHAR: So why -- why did he do that? Chuck Lorre --
JONES: Well, in most companies just have a cute animal or some logo at the end. He has these -- these vanity cards, these essays.
BEHAR: Yes.
JONES: And Charlie was asking, why is he doing this and then reportedly Chuck was leaking things in the press, putting Charlie down. And finally, I think I caught Charlie at the wrong time, because he basically blew up on my radio show.
I was going to have him on that day to talk about that I`ve been out to his house, I`d seen him be blood tested and urine tested, that he was clean. Hey that`s great Charlie, and you know it`s great to see you back because for the six plus years I`ve known him he hadn`t been on drugs and alcohol in just the last few months. And then it basically turned into something else.
BEHAR: Really? Is that true?
JONES: Absolutely no. And I`ve stayed at his house for weeks right before --
(CROSS TALK)
BEHAR: Well, maybe Chuck Lorre was just you know, had really had it with him; that he was really causing him to stop production and everything else, over at the show and it was costing them money and time.
(CROSS TALK)
JONES: Sure, but I mean, had it --
BEHAR: They didn`t like that.
JONES: -- sure had it with him. I mean, let`s face it, Chuck created the show.
BEHAR: Yes.
JONES: He hasn`t had a lot of hits before that. Now, he`s got two hits that they admit were spun off on "Two and a Half Men." Charlie is the engine pulling the train. And Charlie feels insulted by all of this, so he`s saying, I`m done with you. And he`s tired of people`s judgment that`s why he`s been a bit over the top.
BEHAR: All right, well, ABC asked him about his psychological health. Let`s watch that for a minute.
(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)
UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: Some are saying that you`re bipolar.
SHEEN: Wow, what does that mean?
UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: I guess that you know, you`re on two ends of the spectrum.
SHEEN: Wow and then what? What`s the cure, medicine? Make me like them. Not going to happen. I`m bi-winning, I win here and I win there, now what? If I`m bipolar, aren`t there moments where a guy like crashes like in the corner, oh, my God, it`s all my mom`s fault. Shut up.
(END VIDEO CLIP)
BEHAR: See now, you think he`s funny --
(CROSS TALK)
JONES: Winning.
BEHAR: -- they think he`s funny too, but a lot of people think he`s crazy. What -- what -- do you think it`s unfair when people say he`s really out of control and crazy?
JONES: I think he`s crazy alive.
BEHAR: Yes.
JONES: I mean, when you come off months of hard partying, and -- and you get completely clean. He`s working out every day. I worked out with him a few weeks ago --
(CROSS TALK)
BEHAR: Yes.
JONES: -- you get a big adrenaline rush and endorphin rush. And I think that`s what`s happening right here. But -- but look, Charlie is not perfect and I`m not perfect and you`re not perfect.
The bigger issue here is -- he`s been attacked from behind the scenes; they told him, keep your mouth shut. Then, they came out attack him and he feels like for a month he`s had his hands tied, while they`re beating him up and so now, he`s basically taking action and going 110 percent.
BEHAR: But it seems as though, the show kept going on while he was in you know, his whatever -- things that he was getting into. Hookers, what have you -- the show is still on the air because he would show up ok and do the job.
But -- but when he became insubordinate, that`s when it seems that they closed the curtains on him. Yes?
JONES: Sure. I mean, look, he went on a jag in the last few months; he`s off of that now. The -- the "Two and a Half Men" is Charlie. The Charlie I know, the many times I`ve hung out with him, is somebody where there`s no hookers, no drugs, no alcohol. I`m not into all of that.
Sure, he went through one of those periods in his life but he -- the media only pays attention to Charlie when he is in trouble. You`re talking about a 30-year career here. But these snapshots are problems; he is an extreme, intense guy.
BEHAR: I know.
JONES: I just hope that everybody can you know basically work this out and that Charlie has you know put out a quasi-apology. I hope that Chuck Lorre can put on an apology so that fans of "Two and a Half Men" and the crew can basically you know get their lives back.
BEHAR: Well, the only -- the other thing is that his publicist quit today.
(CROSS TALK)
JONES: In fact, he told me -- he told me that before I even heard it on the news.
BEHAR: So it sounds like the publicist has had it. He cannot take it anymore. So -- so -- you know, he -- Chuck Lorre is not the only one who`s up to here with Charlie Sheen. Obviously the publicist is also.
JONES: Well, Charlie feels insulted that again, vanity card after vanity card after vanity card, at the end of the show saying he`s dead inside, that Chuck Lorre is going to live longer than him, he wants the apology. And sure he`s maybe a little manic here and he`s come off a hard time. And he feels like he`s been attacked and stabbed in the back when he was down.
I`ve told Charlie you know privately, you know, I`m saying it here, de-escalate the situation. Sure, you`ve been wronged, but you`re talking about your fans and your family. You`re talking about over $100 million total in syndication and next season and the rest of it.
(CROSS TALK)
BEHAR: That`s a lot of money.
JONES: Absolutely. And listen, I`m somebody that doesn`t really even cover entertainment stuff. He`s just my friend, I was getting him on because he`s off drugs. I was excited about it. And the whole thing has basically, you know, gone crazy. I just hope that in the end, you know the show`s ok. Charlie is ok, folks should pray for Charlie. As his dad said, lift him up in prayer.
BEHAR: Ok, we`re all going to pray for him. Thank you very much, Alex.
JONES: Thank you.
BEHAR: And we`ll be right back. We`ll pray.
(COMMERCIAL BREAK)
BEHAR: Comedian/writer Bruce Vilanch has won two Emmys for writing the Oscar show. Last night at the Kodak Theater, he was at it again making sure the stars had something to say and didn`t just stand around looking pretty. Take a look.
(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)
JAMES FRANCO, ACTOR: Anne, I must say, you look so beautiful and so hip.
ANNE HATHAWAY, ACTRESS: Oh, thank you, James. You look very appealing to a younger demographic as well.
FRANCO: Thank you. Thank you very much.
HATHAWAY: It`s been a great year for lesbians.
FRANCO: That`s right.
HATHAWAY: Not just in general, but in movies.
FRANCO: "The Kids are All Right".
HATHAWAY: Lesbians.
FRANCO: "Black Swan".
HATHAWAY: Dancing lesbians.
FRANCO: "Toy Story 3".
HATHAWAY: Where`s the dad?
(END VIDEO CLIP)
BEHAR: With me now is Bruce Vilanch. Hey Bruce; how are you Bruce?
BRUCE VILANCH, COMEDIAN/WRITER: I`m great. I`m recovered. How are you doing?
BEHAR: You`re recovered. So how do you think on a scale of one to Ricky Gervais, how did they do?
VILANCH: I think you can`t compare them to that because they`re not comics. They`re not stand-ups, they don`t come out and not going to go on attack mode. I think that they were charming together. And they looked great. And they were casual and at ease and they didn`t seem too uptight.
James was James. He`s always kind of -- I want what he`s having. But he doesn`t share.
BEHAR: It could be what he`s having is marijuana. That`s a possibility because he seemed a little high. I mean, Anne is more on the amphetamines and he was on more of a downer. You know what I`m saying?
VILANCH: Well, she`s a precision instrument. Yes, I mean he does whatever he does. You know, first of all, he`s in college so didn`t we all do that in college.
BEHAR: He`s still in college?
VILANCH: You fall asleep in class. Yale. He goes back to -- he`s in a school. He flew back last night to go to courses today.
BEHAR: Yes. Well, it`s graduate school, Bruce. It`s not like --
VILANCH: He`s graduate work. He`s in communications. He`s learning.
BEHAR: He`s learning.
VILANCH: Last night was an object lesson.
BEHAR: Well, I mean a lot of people are criticizing him that he seemed to be phoning it in at times. Although one of the most interesting parts of the night was when he came out in drag.
(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)
HATHAWAY: Oh, wow. Wow. Hey, Marilyn.
FRANCO: You got to wear a tuxedo, so I wore this. The weird part is, I just got a text message from Charlie sheen.
(END VIDEO CLIP)
BEHAR: He`s kind of a butch Marilyn, isn`t he? And why is it that --
VILANCH: I know. He`s an angry drag queen.
BEHAR: Very angry.
VILANCH: Not happy, he`s not having a good tuck day.
BEHAR: Do you notice that a lot of straight guys want to wear dresses and dress up in drag? I notice they love that. Why?
VILANCH: Because it`s liberating, it`s funny. I mean if they had to do it for two years like I did in "Hairspray" and put on the panty hose, which were invented by Nazi scientists at the last day of the bunker, they wouldn`t feel that way.
But I think they like -- for once, they wanted to feel what it`s like to have their clothing move with them as they walk. He wanted to do Cher - - this is how that started. He was convinced that -- he had a great Cher impression and we thought that the song from "Burlesque" was going to be nominated and that Cher would be performing on the show.
And so we were going to have him come out as Cher and start the song and in the middle of the song, Cher would walk out. Kind of tap him on the shoulder and get rid of him and finish the song. Then the song wasn`t nominated and of course, she wouldn`t do it, you know, if the song wasn`t nominated.
But he was determined to be a woman at some point, so we had to go through a whole catalogue of people that he could be.
BEHAR: Well, I missed having Cher there frankly. I would have loved to see Cher there in some crazy outfit.
VILANCH: She doesn`t want to be there.
BEHAR: They were so boring. They always look like they were --
VILANCH: Yes.
BEHAR: Yes. I thought they were dull even though they looks gorgeous, but it was like, come on, bring out a swan, let`s see a tutu. Let`s see some nudity, some, you know, streaking, something.
VILANCH: Well, we had a streaker. We were going to do a streak but we couldn`t get the right person to do it.
BEHAR: You know what Bruce, next year --
VILANCH: And also, you can`t streak anymore. You can`t streak anymore because you have to wear a body stocking. You can`t just come out naked.
BEHAR: Well, next year, you do it.
VILANCH: It makes me ill.
BEHAR: I would like to see you --
(CROSSTALK)
VILANCH: When they do the show in Imax I will streak.
BEHAR: Ok. All right Bruce. Thanks very much. We`ll have more Oscar talk on the way.
(COMMERCIAL BREAK)
BEHAR: Last night, the Oscars were on and on and on. I don`t want to say the show was long, but Christian Bale didn`t have a beard when it started. Here to discuss all things Oscar are fashion expert Jay Manuel. Linda Stasi, TV critic for the "New York Post," and A.J. Hammer, host of "SHOWBIZ TONIGHT" right here on HLN.
So, let`s start with Jay. What did you think of the hosts, Anne Hathaway and James Franco? What did you think?
JAY MANUEL, FASHION EXPERT: I felt like Anne was definitely doing the heavy lifting.
BEHAR: Yes.
MANUEL: I mean, was I the only one who didn`t think that he looked like he was on something?
(CROSSTALK)
BEHAR: Yeah, he was on downers.
LINDA STASI, NEW YORK POST: He looked like -- he looked like he was blind. He looked like he was stoned, like (inaudible), looking on the side, it was like -- he looked like Ray Charles. What was -- I couldn`t understand what he was doing. It was upsetting.
(CROSSTALK)
BEHAR: Do you think it`s going to hurt his career? Because he was really on a roll, and he`s the renaissance man, and then he comes out and he`s like -- and what did you say about the dress -- what he was dressed as?
STASI: Then he came out in that dress like Rudy Giuliani at the Inner Circle Awards. It was such a bomb.
MANUEL: So awkward.
STASI: After she had done that -- the worst song and dance number since Rob Lowe danced with the chairs. It was just--
(CROSSTALK)
MANUEL: At the end of the day, he`s an actor. So I mean, I don`t think it hurt his --
(CROSSTALK)
MANUEL: I don`t think it`s going to hurt his career, but will he host another live gig like that? No, I don`t think so.
BEHAR: I don`t think so. A.J., was this the worst Oscar ever? People were saying it was the worst one they had seen in a long time. What do you think?
A.J. HAMMER, SHOWBIZ TONIGHT: First of all, what did you just say to Oscar writer Bruce Vilanch, Joy? He just ran screaming out of here with no clothes on. I have no idea what just happened.
(CROSSTALK)
HAMMER: Was it the worst ever? Was it the worst ever? Look, I haven`t been watching the Oscars for 83 years. It certainly felt flat to me.
BEHAR: Well, I have. OK?
(LAUGHTER)
BEHAR: I have. All right. Go ahead, sorry.
HAMMER: It took a long time to get off the ground. But I told you just before the weekend on your show that I thought the choice of James Franco and Anne Hathaway was an inspired choice. I also thought it was a big gamble. They took a risk. I don`t think it paid off. The ratings were down. They`re going to spin it in a different way, but at the end of the day, I think Anne Hathaway was really let down by James Franco, because she only signed on after finding out James was going to do the show. I think he really left her holding the bag, so to speak, and it`s too bad, because I like them both so much. I really wanted it to work.
BEHAR: Well, they`re lovely and they are very good actors, and I thought Anne Hathaway was pretty good. She was game and she tried. She was funny.
STASI: Then Billy Crystal came on. It was like, oh, right, that`s what it`s supposed to be.
MANUEL: Exactly, exactly.
BEHAR: Because he did such a great job as the host.
STASI: Right.
BEHAR: But not all the comedians did a great job.
(CROSSTALK)
BEHAR: They bombed too.
STASI: Yes. But at least you have a shot. I mean, Alec Baldwin and Steve Martin, I thought they were really funny. And when it started and they did that funny taped bit, I thought it was really -- this is really going to be good. It is really going to be good. Then it was like the youngest ever and they bring out Kirk Douglas. It was so -- I mean, it was like New Year`s Rockin` Eve with Dick Clark.
(LAUGHTER)
BEHAR: Let me ask you guys, why do you need Kirk Douglas there? He`s 94 years old. Give him a lifetime achievement award and call it a day. We don`t need him to give the award away to supporting actress, right? That`s who he gave it. But it was a big award. He was self-involved, I thought, trying to be funny, and it`s like, come on.
MANUEL: You didn`t think he was funny at all?
(CROSSTALK)
BEHAR: I didn`t think he was funny, no.
(CROSSTALK)
STASI: -- funny compared to Melissa Leo. She looked like she should be in a nursing home.
MANUEL: Poor Melissa Leo.
BEHAR: What do you mean by that?
STASI: First of all, it`s the biggest night of your life. Do you have to drop F bombs like you`re in the trailer park?
BEHAR: I know, that was (EXPLETIVE DELETED) unbelievable.
(LAUGHTER)
STASI: Good thing it`s not--
(CROSSTALK)
MANUEL: It`s interesting that you say that. I mean, people are talking about that that being a publicity stunt. She took ads out in the paper for, you know, the nomination and what have you. At the same time, I mean, I think it all started with that dress. We can -- can we start there?
BEHAR: OK, now, A.J., what did you think about Melissa? Did you think it was tacky for her to drop the F bomb? Or is -- it`s a good publicity stunt. We`re talking about her.
HAMMER: Yeah. Well, it was a great moment if it was at the Golden Globes. I don`t think she did it intentionally. I really don`t think it was a publicity stunt, but you really never know with actors when they give their acceptance speeches. However, you saw her literally grasping in the air trying to find something to say, and I don`t understand that. They prepare for weeks leading up to these awards, what to wear, what jewelry to wear. Why can`t they come up with an acceptance speech? The good ones always do.
BEHAR: Why can`t they?
STASI: The interesting thing is, they memorize like 17,000 hours of dialogue.
(CROSSTALK)
STASI: Memorize a speech, OK?
MANUEL: Come on, let`s -- do you think we`re being hard?
BEHAR: No.
MANUEL: Maybe she really thought she wasn`t going to win. I mean, it was --
(CROSSTALK)
BEHAR: I don`t know. She took out that big PR campaign in the Hollywood--
HAMMER: She was nominated, though. Be prepared for the possibility.
BEHAR: Absolutely, you should. Like, I thought that Colin Firth did have a prepared speech.
STASI: I thought he was great.
(CROSSTALK)
BEHAR: He`s a charmer.
MANUEL: He`s a class act.
BEHAR: When he`s going, I think my career peaked, that was funny.
STASI: Great, that was great.
BEHAR: It`s so British to be, you know, witty like that.
(LAUGHTER)
BEHAR: Now, you want to see Melissa`s sound bite? Let`s watch it. So much fun. Let`s watch that.
(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)
MELISSA LEO, ACTRESS: Yeah, I am kind of speechless, golly sakes, there`s people up there, too. When I watched Kate two years ago, it looked so (EXPLETIVE DELETED).
(END VIDEO CLIP)
BEHAR: You know what`s interesting is that she could say golly sakes and (EXPLETIVE DELETED) in the same sentence.
(LAUGHTER)
STASI: The golly sakes part was the part that wasn`t rehearsed.
BEHAR: That`s right, that`s true.
MANUEL: I thought it was really endearing, her speech. I mean, it woke up the room. I mean, please, that room was so dull.
STASI: I know, but why do you have to do that on -- with the biggest night of your life? Could you just say a different word? It`s just so cheesy.
(CROSSTALK)
BEHAR: A lot of people think that she wasn`t acting in "The Fighter" now because that was the same--
(CROSSTALK)
BEHAR: No, but she was. She was acting. She was great.
STASI: It was great.
BEHAR: I loved her in that.
STASI: My friend cast that movie, and I called her up and I said, Sheila (ph), this is the most brilliant casting ever. I didn`t know it was actually the same person.
BEHAR: One movie I really liked this year that didn`t get nominated was "Blue Valentine."
STASI: Loved it.
BEHAR: It was so good. And it wasn`t nominated.
(CROSSTALK)
STASI: Oh my God.
BEHAR: Yes, A.J., go ahead. What do you want to tell me?
HAMMER: No, no, I just wanted to know as I prepare for my show if they`ve lifted some kind of language restriction on our network all of a sudden.
BEHAR: Well, they`ll bleep me. They bleep. We live to bleep at HLN.
HAMMER: Oh, they`ll bleep you all right.
BEHAR: Yeah, they`ll bleep me.
OK, let`s talk -- now, let`s just go back to Kirk Douglas for a second. Do you think there should be an age cutoff for presenters? I must know.
MANUEL: You`re so bad to have--
(CROSSTALK)
STASI: 104.
(LAUGHTER)
BEHAR: I mean, Kirk Douglas is a legend. He is. He was a great actor in his day, one of a kind and an original.
STASI: "Spartacus."
BEHAR: And why go out like this? I mean, what`s her name -- Marlena Dietrich was brilliant. She stayed in the hotel and never went out after 50.
(LAUGHTER)
BEHAR: That was it. Like, OK, try to remember me as I was when I was -- not defending Hitler. Remember?
(CROSSTALK)
STASI: You know what I loved best about her, Madonna tried and tried and tried and finally went to see her. And she said, I would love to play you in a movie, and she said to Madonna, "I played the trash, you are the trash."
BEHAR: Oh, that is a line, I love that.
(CROSSTALK)
BEHAR: To her face?
STASI: Yeah.
BEHAR: Wow, what a bitch.
STASI: I mean, that`s what I heard. I wasn`t there, I don`t know.
BEHAR: OK, now let`s go to outfits for a second. Pay attention, A.J., because we`re talking--
(CROSSTALK)
HAMMER: Yeah, I`m on it.
BEHAR: OK, now, Anne Hathaway changed eight times throughout the ceremony. Here are some of her looks. I just want to show you. Why does she need all those outfits, may I ask?
MANUEL: You know, here`s the thing. We all know that the Academy Awards, any red carpet dealing with celebrities is now really the runway for designers, and I`m sure every designer came to her and said, oh, wear my dress, wear my dress, wear my dress, and guess what? You`re hosting the Academy Awards. She`s probably not going to do it again. She`s going to change eight times. I don`t think it`s a huge feat, by the way. Everyone is going, oh, she changed. You step in and out of a gown. Someone zips it up. Is it that hard?
(CROSSTALK)
BEHAR: When you`re that skinny, it`s easy, I guess.
STASI: She actually said she asked Whoopi what was her advice for hosting the Oscars and Whoopi said "change your clothes all the time."
BEHAR: Oh, really?
STASI: Yeah.
BEHAR: I didn`t know that.
MANUEL: I think she looked great.
BEHAR: OK, now what about Mila Kunis? I like her.
(CROSSTALK)
STASI: I was so nervous that she`d turn the wrong way and the glue would come off.
MANUEL: It did look a little bit like a negligee, but I mean I was--
BEHAR: So what? It`s beautiful.
MANUEL: I love the fact that she was wearing Elie Saab. I mean, I had called her to wear Elie Saab, you know, for the Golden Globes. I wasn`t, you know, and I like the fact that it was lavender as well. It wasn`t that blush tone.
BEHAR: Is that your favorite color, lavender?
MANUEL: Not really. Why? Am I wearing lavender? No, not today. No, OK, I don`t have lavender.
BEHAR: It was Laurence Olivier`s favorite color.
MANUEL: Oh, OK.
(CROSSTALK)
MANUEL: I love that little subtlety there, Joy.
BEHAR: How about Gwyneth?
MANUEL: OK, Gwyneth Paltrow, first of all, she looked absolutely stunning.
BEHAR: What did she weigh, 100 pounds?
(CROSSTALK)
MANUEL: It looks like liquid gold. You can`t really tell, but there`s a ton of beading all over this dress. It was Calvin Klein. I mean, I love the modern neckline. It was cut out. She looked so classic and modern. And very Hollywood.
(CROSSTALK)
STASI: But then when she started singing, she had the goth makeup on, and she was singing country. It was very psychotic all together.
MANUEL: I don`t know why people feel like they have to do this big change in an awards show. You walked on the carpet with the right choice, stick with it. You know?
(CROSSTALK)
BEHAR: OK, A.J., what was up with Scarlett Johansson and Nicole Kidman? They didn`t look that up to snuff, right?
HAMMER: I don`t know -- look, I`m not going to start trying to criticize fashion. I`m absolutely the wrong guy to ask. I actually thought that Scarlett looked lovely. But I think she`s just this beautiful woman. But Jay, you loved that outfit, didn`t you?
MANUEL: No, you`re killing me. I love Scarlett and I love Dolce and Gabbana. The two of them collided on this carpet.
BEHAR: You know what? I love Dolce, hate Gabbana.
All right, what about -- what about Ms. Cate Blanchett? This outfit was--
(CROSSTALK)
MANUEL: Oh my God, I got the best tweet about Cate Blanchett.
BEHAR: Look at this dress, do we have it?
MANUEL: It was Givenchy Couture, and somebody tweeted me--
BEHAR: Oh, it was Givenchy.
MANUEL: It was Givenchy, and somebody tweeted me saying it looked like she was wearing my grandmother`s rocking chair. I mean, it was -- it`s kind of very--
(CROSSTALK)
BEHAR: It`s kind of very Star Treky, isn`t it?
MANUEL: But you know what, it`s art. I mean, I think she can pull it off. I mean, but people were saying they want risk from--
(CROSSTALK)
BEHAR: I don`t want to run around wearing Guernica, OK? It`s a dress. It`s not a painting.
MANUEL: Yeah, but people expect -- people say that they want the Chers and the Bjorks back, but then they want to criticize poor Cate Blanchett.
BEHAR: Because she didn`t mean it. She meant to look chic and she didn`t.
MANUEL: It was chic. Imagine it in the pages of "Vogue." You want to get Anna Wintour on the phone?
BEHAR: When a girl comes out as a swan, she knows what she`s doing. Cate Blanchett thinks that she`s in a Givenchy, you see what I`m saying?
(CROSSTALK)
STASI: She`s so beautiful that she can come out in the Scarlett Johansson dress and look great. I mean, I just think--
(CROSSTALK)
BEHAR: But they`re all beautiful. Let`s face it, even -- Helena Bonham Carter looked fabulous, I love her.
MANUEL: Was that sarcasm?
BEHAR: No, I love her.
(CROSSTALK)
STASI: Did you see her when she came up at the end for best movie? She was so angry.
(CROSSTALK)
BEHAR: OK. You can catch Jay Manuel on "America`s Top Model" Wednesday nights on the CW network, and of course A.J. Hammer will have more Oscar dish on "SHOWBIZ TONIGHT" immediately following this show. We`ll be right back.
(COMMERCIAL BREAK)
BEHAR: She was here with us a while back and the crew was still talking about her cuchi-cuchi`ing. Her hot dance single is called what else, "Sexy Sexy," but she`s also hot under the collar about a certain Lady Gaga.
Welcome back, the one, the only, Charo. All right.
CHARO: Thank you for inviting me.
BEHAR: I know. And you`re so underdressed and so beautifully understated.
CHARO: I dressed for you.
BEHAR: I know. It`s beautiful. Where did you get that?
CHARO: My sister.
BEHAR: Your sister made it?
CHARO: She designed it.
BEHAR: It`s beautiful.
CHARO: Make everybody look very feminine, very exciting. As a matter of fact, did you see the Oscars last night?
BEHAR: Yes, you said that would have been a good dress to wear?
CHARO: It would have been the best.
BEHAR: What did you think of it?
CHARO: I think that the lady looked beautiful. Too much lipstick.
(CROSSTALK)
CHARO: They looked like they had chorisos (ph) on the mouth, everyone, when they were talking. They can suck an orange (inaudible) sometimes. I don`t know why they have so much lipstick.
BEHAR: I don`t know, it must be the new trend.
CHARO: Anyway, it was glamour.
(CROSSTALK)
BEHAR: What did you think about Cate Blanchett`s dress?
CHARO: Oh my God!
(CROSSTALK)
CHARO: The most stupid thing -- what are these (inaudible) -- they showed the two hunky (ph) maraca (ph) flat there, and then that little thing -- I mean, they should hang the designer.
BEHAR: Can we see the dress?
(CROSSTALK)
CHARO: She`s beautiful.
BEHAR: She is beautiful.
CHARO: But look at that!
BEHAR: Yes.
CHARO: Look at when they go to there -- look--
BEHAR: In the middle there, it`s like a tray. Like you can have dinner on it.
(CROSSTALK)
CHARO: (SPEAKING SPANISH).
BEHAR: Yeah, yeah.
CHARO: The designer (inaudible) need vacation.
BEHAR: All right. Now, let me ask you about Lady Gaga. You have a little issue with her. This is what you said, you said, "I see Lady Gaga like Madonna with diarrhea." What do you mean by that, exactly?
CHARO: Well, it`s perfect English.
BEHAR: That`s true. It is perfect English.
(LAUGHTER)
CHARO: I don`t believe it needs any translation.
BEHAR: Well, explain it a little bit too me.
CHARO: OK. What happened is that I respect seriously impersonators. They are honest. You have a too good impersonator (inaudible).
BEHAR: Oh, really?
CHARO: And I have one called (inaudible), that if I (inaudible) play guitar, I`d be in Hawaii singing aloha. They are honest. But when somebody walking in, tikki, tikki, tikki, tee, and like in a style that was created by Madonna, and they`re stealing (ph) set by set, move by move, they`ve always thought (ph) they`re very beautiful. Please don`t misconstrue me. But--
BEHAR: I would never, you know.
(LAUGHTER)
(CROSSTALK)
CHARO: Honest, so yes, I say (inaudible). Lady Gaga is Madonna with diarrhea.
BEHAR: She`s so -- why the diarrhea, though? If you say she`s copying her step by step.
CHARO: Because she doesn`t copy exactly. It`s like when you have got perfection, there will be another Madonna. But when something is missing, is when you`ve got diarrhea. You got it?
BEHAR: Oh, I see. I sort of get it. Yeah. Now, do you think Lady Gaga will be around in 20 years?
CHARO: I, with her voice, yes. Is she (inaudible) -- let me tell you what happened--
BEHAR: She has to reinvent. Madonna kept reinventing herself.
(CROSSTALK)
BEHAR: Maybe she`ll reinvent herself into Liza Minnelli.
(LAUGHTER)
CHARO: That will be--
(LAUGHTER)
(CROSSTALK)
CHARO: Anyway, you know what I mean.
BEHAR: What?
CHARO: When I make a lot of money with cuchi-cuchi, one day looked in a mirror and I said, you bitch, you sold out. You`re so dumb.
BEHAR: You really think so?
CHARO: I was talking to the mirror. I said, what the hell are you doing? Money, money --
BEHAR: Because you`re a great classical guitarist. I know.
CHARO: That`s my answer for Lady Gaga. Is she really out to make the name instead of finding who is she (inaudible). When the money was there, I picked up my guitar and I blessed (ph) Segovia, my teacher.
BEHAR: Andres Segovia was your teacher?
CHARO: For seven years.
(CROSSTALK)
BEHAR: Was it Andres or the -- which Segovia?
CHARO: Andres Segovia.
BEHAR: The real one.
CHARO: The real one. He have an institution for children that got no money, and he wanted (ph) (inaudible) technique. I passed the audition. He teach me for seven years, we sell 80 percent (ph) that was the Spanish (inaudible)--
(CROSSTALK)
CHARO: And now I`m going to do that. If you ever invite me again, God willing, to announcing that I`m going to have my Web site teaching children, because education is getting so bad for these (inaudible) children, that I wanted to pass what--
(CROSSTALK)
CHARO: -- Segovia gave to me.
BEHAR: -- you`re talking about that?
CHARO: Yes.
BEHAR: Is that what you`re talking about? Because I missed a few words in there.
CHARO: (EXPLETIVE DELETED). I`m talking English, you don`t got it?
BEHAR: Well, I`m trying to -- how long have you been in this country?
CHARO: Before you were born. I came here with Christopher Columbus.
BEHAR: I don`t think so.
(LAUGHTER)
BEHAR: But did you ever try to make the accent a little less? I mean, I don`t see why you would.
CHARO: What accent, Joy? I`m trying to do my best.
BEHAR: I know, I know you`re trying to do your best.
CHARO: No, that really pissed me off. I`m talking serious now. The rain in Spain falls mainly on the plain.
BEHAR: Very good.
CHARO: But tell me yes, the White Party, be serious.
BEHAR: The White Party. OK.
CHARO: The White Party.
BEHAR: Well, we have to take a break. When we come back.
CHARO: We`ll be right back.
BEHAR: We`ll be right back with more from Charo in a minute.
(CROSSTALK)
(COMMERCIAL BREAK)
(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)
CHARO: Those of you that don`t know what the hell cuchi-cuchi means, cuchi-cuchi (inaudible), my weight (ph) (inaudible), she copy from me. So this is the right way, to the right, to the left, to the front, cuchi-cuchi mean bump or sex or whatever you want to do. It is life and I express cuchi-cuchi when I am very happy and when I am very horny.
(END VIDEO CLIP)
BEHAR: It is an interesting philosophy. That was Charo`s last appearance on this explaining cuchi-cuchi, which needs no explanation. Really.
CHARO: No, no, it means money.
BEHAR: It means money, that`s right.
(LAUGHTER)
BEHAR: OK. I mean, the cuchi-cuchi has got what you got here -- what got you here.
CHARO: Cuchi-cuchi was my survival. When I came to this country, stranded (ph) and graduate with honor again by the great guitarist Andres Segovia, I went to "The Tonight Show," Joy. I went to the producer, probably you remember, you know, de Cordova (ph), and I said, Freddy de Cordova (ph), can I play flamenco? And I`m holding my guitar in my hand. He said, Charo, we don`t have flamenco band for you to play here with. Then I said, OK, I want to survive, I got to make money, I want to make it in this beautiful country, I want to do whatever, and (inaudible).
BEHAR: And you did it, and you did it, and it worked.
CHARO: Now "Sexy Sexy."
BEHAR: Oh, yeah, "Sexy Sexy." That`s your new CD.
CHARO: When you hold it, hold it this way not because -- (inaudible). This is the new remix, I play the guitar. The DJ, when they are training the discotheque, they called and said why don`t you have a version where also you play the (inaudible) also guitar. And it`s unbelievable. What she is doing right now is a hell of a favor, because she has a good (ph) like (ph) for me. Thank you for holding it. "Sexy Sexy," in a week, available in iTunes.
BEHAR: OK. I have a couple of questions. You know what Twitter is?
CHARO: Yes! I cannot Twitter because I Twitter with an accent.
(LAUGHTER)
BEHAR: I mean, Twitter is what they are doing in Libya, what they did in Egypt, what`s causing revolutions all around the world.
CHARO: OK.
BEHAR: But when people Twitter here, they ask questions like, "you look great, what kind of plastic surgery have you had?"
CHARO: Not yet. But I`m going to have it. And I`m going to have it -- I`m going to call Joy Behar show. When I think it`s hanging down. But you know what? I admire Joan Rivers with passion, because--
BEHAR: Joan Rivers. I`m translating a little bit.
CHARO: No, no, no, they got it. Joan Rivers is a survivor. She`s a hard worker. She`s a genius. She was very cute before the plastic surgery. Now she look more beautiful, but she used to be Jewish. Now she looks Chinese.
(LAUGHTER)
CHARO: No, I love her.
(CROSSTALK)
BEHAR: She doesn`t (ph) look Chinese.
CHARO: A little bit like this. You don`t think so?
BEHAR: I don`t think so. Now wait, before you go, because I only have a minute --
(CROSSTALK)
BEHAR: White Party in the Palm Springs, the largest gay dance music festival in New York -- in America.
CHARO: In the world. It`s going to be in Palm Springs, and they debut "Sexy Sexy," the party mix, and I love to be there. It`s an honor.
BEHAR: The gays love you.
CHARO: Let me tell you why.
BEHAR: In Palm Springs.
CHARO: Let me tell you why. I believe in no discrimination. And I believe that white people have to be (inaudible). They are human like you, like me, like everyone else, genius to begin with. Hollywood owes a lot to gays, and it`s an honor to be there and debut "Sexy Sexy." Thank you for letting me say it.
BEHAR: On "The View?" This is not "The View."
UNIDENTIFIED MALE: No, the debut.
BEHAR: Oh, debut.
(LAUGHTER)
(CROSSTALK)
BEHAR: (SPEAKING SPANISH)
CHARO: (SPEAKING SPANISH)
(CROSSTALK)
BEHAR: -- at the White Party. Go to jeffreysanger.com (ph). Buenos noches.
CHARO: Hasta la vista!
(LAUGHTER)
END
