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Cheating a Growing Problem in America
Aired December 08, 2003 - 15:15 ET
THIS IS A RUSH TRANSCRIPT. THIS COPY MAY NOT BE IN ITS FINAL FORM AND MAY BE UPDATED.
THIS IS A RUSH TRANSCRIPT. THIS COPY MAY NOT BE IN ITS FINAL FORM AND MAY BE UPDATED.
KYRA PHILLIPS, ANCHOR: Till death do us part. Or do you have a sweetie on the side?
This week on LIVE FROM, we're looking at fidelity in America. Why are some people faithful and others on the make?
Our Kathy Slobogin begins with a look at where we stand.
(BEGIN VIDEOTAPE)
UNIDENTIFIED MALE: We better get going. I better get dressed here in a second.
UNIDENTIFIED MALE: You know what? Our shirts had to get mixed up.
Nervous. Can you tell?
UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: I love him. He's my best friend.
UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE (singing): Diamonds are a girl's best friend.
UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: He loves me. He loves me. He loves me.
We're going to spend the rest of our lives together.
KATHY SLOBOGIN, CNN CORRESPONDENT (voice-over): Brook Pittman (ph) is minutes away from marrying her college sweetheart, Chris Jeffs (ph).
They've known each other for ten years, but they're still nervous.
UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: With this ring I thee wed.
UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: I have no doubt that Chris will be faithful to me for the rest of his life.
UNIDENTIFIED MALE: You may now kiss the bride.
SLOBOGIN: But in fact, the odds are stacked against Chris and Brook. Half of all marriages that start like this...
BRAD DAHOUVER, PRIVATE INVESTIGATOR: Got a visual. Got a visual.
SLOBOGIN: ... end up like this.
UNIDENTIFIED MALE: Loving, loving, touching.
DAHOUVER: That was with my client's husband with that girl. It looks like a long night together to me.
SLOBOGIN: Private investigator Brad Dahouver is on the trail of a cheating husband.
DAHOUVER: Our client doesn't have any actual proof. They're kissing.
She has suspicions. He's become distant, as she puts it.
Are they going to do it again?
He's been staying at work late, going out with friends.
SLOBOGIN: She has proof now.
DAHOUVER: We documented blatant cheating activity tonight. We could take the video and put the video into a dictionary under "cheating."
If that was me personally, I would be at my attorney's office on Monday morning.
SLOBOGIN: And that's exactly where many scorned spouses go. Fifty percent of marriages end in divorce, and adultery is one of the top reasons.
JOHN MAYOUE, ATTORNEY: It's something that we no longer look at as the unusual part of a marriage. It's the usual part of a marriage for a lot of Americans. It's the question of when you're going to cheat.
(END VIDEOTAPE)
SLOBOGIN: As to just how usual cheating in marriage is today, the best estimates are that about 45 percent of all married men and a quarter of married women have an affair at some time during their marriage.
And the latest trend is that the women are catching up with the men -- Kyra.
PHILLIPS: Kathy, are we just more accepting of infidelity today?
SLOBOGIN: Actually, no. All the national surveys show that upwards of 90 percent of American couples don't accept infidelity. They think it's wrong. But at least half of all marriages are hit by infidelity.
So obviously there's a disconnect and some would even call it hypocrisy. We just don't practice what we preach.
PHILLIPS: So is it any worse now than it used to be?
SLOBOGIN: Well, you know, there really aren't a lot of good barometers for infidelity that have existed over time. But one large national survey did look at different age cohorts. And they found that today's middle-aged married couples are cheating at about twice the rate of the previous generation. So that suggests there is an increase.
And one of the reasons for that is probably that, with the entry of large numbers of women into the labor market, the workplace has become a fertile breeding ground for affairs. Friendships with colleagues that slip into intimacy. And that, by the way, is the subject of tomorrow's excerpt -- Kyra.
PHILLIPS: All right. We'll follow that special report. Kathy Slobogin, keeping us honest. Thank you.
TO ORDER A VIDEO OF THIS TRANSCRIPT, PLEASE CALL 800-CNN-NEWS OR USE OUR SECURE ONLINE ORDER FORM LOCATED AT www.fdch.com
Aired December 8, 2003 - 15:15 ET
THIS IS A RUSH TRANSCRIPT. THIS COPY MAY NOT BE IN ITS FINAL FORM AND MAY BE UPDATED.
KYRA PHILLIPS, ANCHOR: Till death do us part. Or do you have a sweetie on the side?
This week on LIVE FROM, we're looking at fidelity in America. Why are some people faithful and others on the make?
Our Kathy Slobogin begins with a look at where we stand.
(BEGIN VIDEOTAPE)
UNIDENTIFIED MALE: We better get going. I better get dressed here in a second.
UNIDENTIFIED MALE: You know what? Our shirts had to get mixed up.
Nervous. Can you tell?
UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: I love him. He's my best friend.
UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE (singing): Diamonds are a girl's best friend.
UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: He loves me. He loves me. He loves me.
We're going to spend the rest of our lives together.
KATHY SLOBOGIN, CNN CORRESPONDENT (voice-over): Brook Pittman (ph) is minutes away from marrying her college sweetheart, Chris Jeffs (ph).
They've known each other for ten years, but they're still nervous.
UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: With this ring I thee wed.
UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: I have no doubt that Chris will be faithful to me for the rest of his life.
UNIDENTIFIED MALE: You may now kiss the bride.
SLOBOGIN: But in fact, the odds are stacked against Chris and Brook. Half of all marriages that start like this...
BRAD DAHOUVER, PRIVATE INVESTIGATOR: Got a visual. Got a visual.
SLOBOGIN: ... end up like this.
UNIDENTIFIED MALE: Loving, loving, touching.
DAHOUVER: That was with my client's husband with that girl. It looks like a long night together to me.
SLOBOGIN: Private investigator Brad Dahouver is on the trail of a cheating husband.
DAHOUVER: Our client doesn't have any actual proof. They're kissing.
She has suspicions. He's become distant, as she puts it.
Are they going to do it again?
He's been staying at work late, going out with friends.
SLOBOGIN: She has proof now.
DAHOUVER: We documented blatant cheating activity tonight. We could take the video and put the video into a dictionary under "cheating."
If that was me personally, I would be at my attorney's office on Monday morning.
SLOBOGIN: And that's exactly where many scorned spouses go. Fifty percent of marriages end in divorce, and adultery is one of the top reasons.
JOHN MAYOUE, ATTORNEY: It's something that we no longer look at as the unusual part of a marriage. It's the usual part of a marriage for a lot of Americans. It's the question of when you're going to cheat.
(END VIDEOTAPE)
SLOBOGIN: As to just how usual cheating in marriage is today, the best estimates are that about 45 percent of all married men and a quarter of married women have an affair at some time during their marriage.
And the latest trend is that the women are catching up with the men -- Kyra.
PHILLIPS: Kathy, are we just more accepting of infidelity today?
SLOBOGIN: Actually, no. All the national surveys show that upwards of 90 percent of American couples don't accept infidelity. They think it's wrong. But at least half of all marriages are hit by infidelity.
So obviously there's a disconnect and some would even call it hypocrisy. We just don't practice what we preach.
PHILLIPS: So is it any worse now than it used to be?
SLOBOGIN: Well, you know, there really aren't a lot of good barometers for infidelity that have existed over time. But one large national survey did look at different age cohorts. And they found that today's middle-aged married couples are cheating at about twice the rate of the previous generation. So that suggests there is an increase.
And one of the reasons for that is probably that, with the entry of large numbers of women into the labor market, the workplace has become a fertile breeding ground for affairs. Friendships with colleagues that slip into intimacy. And that, by the way, is the subject of tomorrow's excerpt -- Kyra.
PHILLIPS: All right. We'll follow that special report. Kathy Slobogin, keeping us honest. Thank you.
TO ORDER A VIDEO OF THIS TRANSCRIPT, PLEASE CALL 800-CNN-NEWS OR USE OUR SECURE ONLINE ORDER FORM LOCATED AT www.fdch.com
