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Paula Zahn Now
Families Overcome Obstacles To Have Children
Aired November 24, 2005 - 20:00 ET
THIS IS A RUSH TRANSCRIPT. THIS COPY MAY NOT BE IN ITS FINAL FORM AND MAY BE UPDATED.
KITTY PILGRIM, CNN ANCHOR: Now in the news on CNN, 150,000 troops marked this holiday away from home. But it was also a day of violence in Iraq. Two American soldiers were killed when their patrol was hit by a roadside bomb southwest of Baghdad.
And insurgents exploded a car bomb outside a hospital, killing 30 Iraqis.
NTSB investigators worked this Thanksgiving, trying to determine why an Illinois commuter train slammed into 15 cars, injuring 16 people. Two victims are still in serious condition. There is conflicting information as to whether or not the crossing gates were up or down at the time of the accident.
And in New Orleans, church volunteers from around the country prepared a Thanksgiving dinner for more than 1,000 people. And 600 runners took part in the annual New Orleans Turkey Day Race this year.
More news at the bottom of the hour. Up next, "PAULA ZAHN NOW."
PAULA ZAHN, CNN ANCHOR: Good evening, everyone. I'm Paula Zahn. Thanks so much for joining us.
Tonight, as you and your family enjoy your Thanksgiving holiday, I want to share with you some remarkable stories that celebrate family.
A loving couple yearning for a child against all odds.
(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)
ABBY HARTMAN, MOTHER OF QUADRUPLETS: It was really frustrating. I thought it would be so easy.
(END VIDEO CLIP)
ZAHN: A mother's dedication to a child with special needs.
(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)
UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: My son couldn't hug me, and he wasn't speaking, and he wasn't crawling, and he wasn't -- his head was like a floppy doll.
(END VIDEO CLIP)
ZAHN: A husband and father, helping the women in his life fight for theirs.
(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)
UNIDENTIFIED MALE: You're almost helpless, and that was a very difficult thing for me.
(END VIDEO CLIP)
ZAHN: And a famous mom pushed biological limits of motherhood past the age of 50.
(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)
JOAN LUNDEN, FORMER TV ANCHOR: Well, let me just say that men have been having children at 50 and older for decades.
(END VIDEO CLIP)
ZAHN: In a season of hope and thanksgiving, compelling stories about the power of family.
Family, of course, is what this day is all about. And millions have had to overcome great obstacles just to even have children. I'm talking about couples who, for one reason or another, couldn't conceive on their own.
Almost three decades of revolutionary medicine have brought them some new hope, along with some amazing new challenges.
I want to start tonight with the story of Abby and Georg Hartman, documentary filmmakers who turned the camera on themselves during their quest to create a family.
(BEGIN VIDEOTAPE)
A. HARTMAN: Somebody once asked me what I wanted to be when I grew up, and everybody had these great ideas, and doctors and lawyers. And I said, I want to be a mom. I want to be a really good mom.
ZAHN (voice-over): You know that expression, Be careful what you wish for? Abby Hartman certainly got her wish, in spades.
A. HARTMAN: Hello.
ZAHN: The odds of what happened to Abby are 1 in 25 million. She gave birth to quadruplets who are two sets of identical twins.
(on camera): I love that little tuft of hair sticking up on your head. You have a little Mohawk.
(voice-over): Meet Max.
A. HARTMAN: Oh, nice, (INAUDIBLE), good job.
ZAHN: Sid.
A. HARTMAN: She always has this little strawberry on the top of her head.
ZAHN: Emmy.
A. HARTMAN: So that's how you know Emmy from ...
ZAHN: (on camera): I haven't met Emmy yet. Hi, Emmy.
(voice-over): And the tiniest, Lucy.
A. HARTMAN: So she doesn't eat as much as everybody, but she's starting to catch up a little bit.
ZAHN: At least, that's who I think she is.
A. HARTMAN: That's Max.
Sorry, here's Sid.
ZAHN (on camera): See, there's no way I can tell them apart.
(voice-over): Three years ago, if you had asked Abby and husband Georg, they didn't even know if they could have children. You see, Abby couldn't get pregnant.
A. HARTMAN: Very, very frustrating, because I thought it would be so easy. I didn't get pregnant, and the next month, nothing happened, and it kept, like, you know, not working. So I just couldn't believe it. And I knew it was me, because I knew there was something going on in my body that wasn't quite right.
ZAHN: Abby was right. Doctors diagnosed her with blocked Fallopian tubes. Fortunately, there were a lot of treatment choices.
A. HARTMAN: That's progesterone cream.
ZAHN: But unfortunately, they didn't have a lot of money.
Abby could have surgery to unblock her tubes, then try to get pregnant, or she could have fertility treatments that bypassed the blocked tubes. Their health insurance covered neither procedure.
GEORG HARTMAN, FATHER OF QUADRUPLETS: Did it hurt?
A. HARTMAN: No, no.
ZAHN: Abby and Georg decided to go with what they thought gave them the greatest odds of getting pregnant, in vitro fertilization.
A. HARTMAN: I was pretty confident the in vitro would work, because I am young, and I knew that I just needed help to get from A to B, basically. And I knew they were planning on implanting two embryos. So we thought, best case scenario, how cool would it be if we had twins. Best case scenario, that would be so great if we have twins.
A. HARTMAN (on phone): OK, thanks. Bye. Honey, we're pregnant!
ZAHN: It was the moment they'd been waiting for. In the initial sonograms, doctors could see there were two fetuses, twins. In follow-up exams, they then saw something else.
A. HARTMAN: And I'm lying there, and I said, OK, I want a head count. And I hear, Oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, from the ultrasound woman. And what? What? What? She's like, there's another one. So I said, What do you mean? She said, There's another one down here. I said, Will they both split? And she goes, Yes. And I thought, Oh, my God, something's terribly wrong. They're going to keep multiplying...
(CROSSTALK)
A. HARTMAN: ... 40 babies
(CROSSTALK)
A. HARTMAN: And the doctor said, oh, yes, yes, another one. So, two sets of identical twins. I said, What are the chances? I mean, that's something that is so random and so statistically weird that -- and it happened to us.
ZAHN: Now, were you at the appointment when all four babies were found?
A. HARTMAN: Yes.
G. HARTMAN: Yes, yes, I was.
A. HARTMAN: I don't even remember seeing him. It was a dark room, and he's in the corner. And all I know is, I hear, like, a bang, it was like ...
G. HARTMAN: That was me, that was me hitting the wall, honey. I was holding onto the wall in the office ...
ZAHN: And was that a bang of, Oh, no, I can't do this, or, Oh, my God, it's really me?
G. HARTMAN: It was a bang of, Oh, my God, what's happening? Is this really my life? It was a really surreal moment.
A. HARTMAN (on phone): Oh, my God, I hope you're sitting.
ZAHN: The Hartmans finally got what they wanted. But this type of pregnancy is very extreme, and comes with a very high risk. Women's bodies were not built to carry four babies. Babies in multiple births are more likely to be born earlier, smaller, with lifelong disabilities.
A. HARTMAN: Honey, get it away. It's too big.
UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: Too big? We haven't even gotten there yet. A. HARTMAN: I know.
ZAHN: Abby's first four months of pregnancy went by OK. She kept on getting bigger and bigger, month after month. But then the trouble started on Thanksgiving Day 2003.
A. HARTMAN: At five months, I started contracting, dilating. And I went to the hospital, and they told me that I might have to deliver two, knowing that they won't survive, and trying to keep the other two in. So they really gave me like a, you know, 50 percent chance that all the babies would survive.
(on phone): It's just stressful. I don't want to make it worse.
ZAHN: The Hartmans had to make a life-or-death decision, risk losing babies, or undergo a circlage, where the cervix is literally stitched closed to keep the babies inside. They opted for the circlage, despite the danger that Abby's cervix could become infected, or a gestational sac could rupture and put Mom and all the babies' health in danger.
G. HARTMAN: Abby's in surgery right now. They're stitching her up and trying to keep the babies in there, because her cervix is opening up. So she won't be able to hold the babies in there long enough so that they have a chance to survive.
ZAHN (on camera): It's one thing for Abby to be going through all of this physically. It had to be absolute torture for you psychologically.
G. HARTMAN: Right. You know, the worst, on my part, was feeling so helpless. I knew that my role in this was to be the rock. I mean, I just had to hide my fears as good as I could for at least until the babies were born.
A. HARTMAN: I just wish I felt better. And I feel bad that you're doing all the work.
ZAHN (voice-over): Georg quit his job as a director of photography at MTV to stay at home.
G. HARTMAN: Here's the tea.
ZAHN: Abby had to stay in bed for the rest of her pregnancy. She gained 85 pounds.
A. HARTMAN: I know. They're all inside right now.
ZAHN: Her stomach grew so much, the doctor stopped taking measurements.
But perhaps most extreme is that, unbelievably, she had contractions every day, at least five times a day for the next two months.
A. HARTMAN: Being pregnant with them was really, really scary, because it was all on me. You know, I felt, I really want to keep these babies. I want them to be OK. And I don't know if my body can do that.
ZAHN (on camera): Because every time a contraction came...
A. HARTMAN: I felt no.
ZAHN: ... you thought they were going to go early.
A. HARTMAN: Yes, I'm too early. I'm at 21 weeks, I'm too early. I'm at 22 weeks, I'm too early. It's Christmas, 24 weeks. Too early, you know?
G. HARTMAN: So at 28 weeks we were, like, Yay, 28 weeks!
A. HARTMAN: And my water broke.
ZAHN (voice-over): The Hartman quads were ready to arrive. But with an average weight of under just two pounds, would they all be healthy? Would there be complications?
More when we come back.
(END VIDEOTAPE)
(COMMERCIAL BREAK)
ZAHN: Tonight, we are devoting the entire hour to the power of family. Before the break, I introduced you to Georg and Abby Hartman, documentary filmmakers who turned the camera on their own struggle to have children.
Now, it's the moment of truth for the Hartmans. Their struggle to conceive hasn't been easy, and the physical and emotional strains of carrying two sets of twins is about to end as Abby faces the most exciting and uncertain of moments, the rush to the hospital.
(BEGIN VIDEOTAPE)
ZAHN (voice-over): January 16, 2004, 1:15 a.m. Abby Hartman goes into labor, about to give birth to two sets of identical twins. She carried the quads for 28 weeks, but they're still a couple of months premature.
A team of 40 doctors and nurses at Cedars Sinai Medical Center in L.A. is waiting. Twelve hours of labor, then a carefully choreographed delivery.
UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: Feel suction pressure, so it's normal to feel this, OK? Don't let it worry you.
A. HARTMAN: Ow.
UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: Baby A is out.
(CROSSTALK) UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: It's a boy.
UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: Baby B, out.
UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: Baby B's out.
UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: We have baby three.
UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: Baby three is out.
UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: Baby four (INAUDIBLE).
UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: We are done. Hallelujah!
UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: Yay!
UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: Yay!
G. HARTMAN: I heard a doctor say...
A. HARTMAN: Boys...
G. HARTMAN: ... boys had...
A. HARTMAN: ... needed to be intubated.
G. HARTMAN: ... needed to be intubated.
A. HARTMAN: I can't see them.
I got to see a girl. I don't know which girl it was.
G. HARTMAN: (INAUDIBLE).
A. HARTMAN: Oh, my God, she's so small.
ZAHN (on camera): And that was it, and then they were whisked off.
A. HARTMAN: Whisked off.
G. HARTMAN: It all happened really fast, and they were rushed to the NICU.
A. HARTMAN: Yes. And I didn't see them for another 12 hours.
ZAHN (voice-over): The babies were too fragile. Far from out of the woods, they weighed between 1 pound, 15 ounces, and 2 pounds, 11 ounces. They each had a host of complications. Sid had jaundice. Max, a collapsed lung. Emmy had a brain bleed. Lucy, a blood infection.
For the next three months, they lived in the NICU, the neonatal intensive care unit.
A. HARTMAN: It was so frightening. We really, really didn't know if we were going to get all four babies home. One day, one of our daughters was diagnosed with, you know, bleeding on the brain. The next day she had bacterial meningitis. The next day...
G. HARTMAN: Then the next day...
A. HARTMAN: The next day they had...
G. HARTMAN: ... Max's lung collapsed.
A. HARTMAN: Yes, so, I mean...
G. HARTMAN: So, I mean, it was always something.
A. HARTMAN: ... every day, for the first two months, every day was something.
ZAHN (on camera): So basically from the time these babies were born...
A. HARTMAN: Yes.
ZAHN: ... to the first three months...
A. HARTMAN: Yes.
ZAHN: ... you were thrown a curveball almost every ...
(CROSSTALK)
A. HARTMAN: Definitely. I was -- we were a wreck. I mean, it seems like a blur. It seems like it -- I just feel like it was just crazy. I mean, emotionally, so challenging. You know, and for us, for the two of us to get through that was -- it's really -- I mean, that was really difficult.
ZAHN: How much pressure did it put on your relationship?
G. HARTMAN: I think it can do a number on even, you know, the healthiest relationship to begin with. But, in a way, it just made us stronger as a unit, because we have, you know, this...
A. HARTMAN: We were doing it together.
G. HARTMAN: We were doing it together.
ZAHN (voice-over): The biggest test came when the quads were just 2 weeks old. All four needed heart surgery to repair defective valves.
G. HARTMAN: The first time, it's, like, the end of the world.
A. HARTMAN: Yes, first time we really did not know...
G. HARTMAN: The second time...
A. HARTMAN: ... if she would make it. G. HARTMAN: I mean, it's terrible. It's invasive. But it worked out the first time.
A. HARTMAN: Right.
G. HARTMAN: So why shouldn't it work out the second time?
A. HARTMAN: Yes. Third...
G. HARTMAN: The third time, you know, it keeps getting easier somehow. I mean...
A. HARTMAN: Yes, yes, somehow.
G. HARTMAN: It's really -- I mean, you really do get used to almost anything.
ZAHN: The babies survived surgery. Slowly, their tiny, underdeveloped bodies overcame the hurdles.
Three months later, each one weighed more than 6 pounds. The Hartman kids were ready to go home.
A. HARTMAN: As soon as they all got in the car to come home, we really -- that was probably the best day of our life.
G. HARTMAN: Say hi. Good boy.
Then a whole new stage ...
A. HARTMAN: Yes, we were, like, oh, thank God, oh.
Where are you going?
G. HARTMAN: He just puked a lot.
A. HARTMAN: It was chaos.
G. HARTMAN: Hang in there.
A. HARTMAN: We tried really, really hard to make it as calm as possible. So we just decided to take it one day at a time, one hour at a time, one minute at a time, and each day was a different day. And each day got better and better.
ZAHN: In the beginning, life in the Hartman house was a nonstop, bone-tiring marathon, 40 diaper changes a day, finish feeding one baby, then start the other, and then sleep, if you want to call it that. Mom and Dad had only an hour or two of it a night.
(on camera): Are there ever points where you get so tired...
A. HARTMAN: Yes.
ZAHN: ... where you don't think you can handle it? A. HARTMAN: And then they go to bed. Sometimes you're just, like, How am I going to wake up tomorrow and do this all over again? But as soon as you wake up in the morning, it's kind of a new day, and you see them, and they're smiling at you like nothing happened the day before, and you go on again.
Our whole philosophy of this whole thing, going into it, was, we're going to just -- everyone was like, How are you going to do it? How are you going to do it? You can't do it. How are you going to buy baby food? How are you going, you know, give them anything? How -- You know, and we just -- we have, what we have is love, and understanding of each other. And we have a great relationship. And I think that really, really helps.
UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: Happy birthday, dear Sid...
UNIDENTIFIED MALE: Happy birthday, dear Sid...
UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: Happy birthday, dear Sid...
UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: ... Max...
UNIDENTIFIED MALE: ... Max...
UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: ... Max...
UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: ... Lucy...
UNIDENTIFIED MALE: ... Lucy...
UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: ... Lucy...
UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: ... Emmy...
UNIDENTIFIED MALE: ... Emmy...
UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: ... Emmy...
ZAHN (voice-over): Abby and Georg have come a long way since those infertile years.
A. HARTMAN: Hands up.
ZAHN: Today, the quads are all healthy and thriving. There's still one hurdle that Abby and Georg are struggling with.
G. HARTMAN: It's like, you know, running a small restaurant basically, you know, already. And they're, just, like, 1.
ZAHN: The high cost of having these babies, $4.4 million in medical bills. Insurance covered most, but not all of it. And Georg estimates that it will cost nearly half a million dollars to send all four of his kids to college.
The Hartmans are tackling all of this like they have everything else, as a team. A. HARTMAN: Yay, we got it.
ZAHN: And even the babies are pitching in by acting and modeling.
A. HARTMAN: It's not something we really love doing. It's something they seem to really love, because they get one-on-one attention with us, you know, each time we bring one in. They have their own little savings accounts that they're slowly starting to build, which is good.
G. HARTMAN: Later that night, her water broke.
ZAHN: Georg, an award-winning documentary filmmaker, is hoping to turn their lives into a reality show.
But forget about the lack of money and lack of sleep. This family lacks little else. From the moment they all wake up at 6:00 a.m. ...
A. HARTMAN: Good night, Sidney...
ZAHN: ... to the moment these adorable little babies go to sleep at 7:00 p.m., the Hartman household is filled with laughter, love, and a whole lot of luck. And when Abby and Georg are really lucky...
G. HARTMAN: OK, baby, cheers.
ZAHN: ... a quiet dinner for two.
A. HARTMAN: I am so tired.
G. HARTMAN: I know.
(END VIDEOTAPE)
ZAHN: And they might not see a quiet moment like that for another year or two.
One more thing. The Hartmans tell us the quads are getting ready for their second birthday and are doing just great.
My next story focuses on a family tested, facing cancer not once, not twice, but three times. My emotional interview with former U.S. health secretary Tommy Thompson.
(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)
TOMMY THOMPSON, FORMER SECRETARY OF HEALTH AND HUMAN SERVICES: And you know so little, and you want to do so much, and you feel just like you're paralyzed, that you can't reach out and say, you know, Stop this.
ZAHN: A family's ordeal. Wife, daughter, and mother-in-law, all stricken with the disease.
And a little bit later on, Joan Lunden's story, becoming the mother of twins twice, after she turned 50.
(COMMERCIAL BREAK)
PILGRIM: Now in the news on CNN, a second train crash in the Chicago area in just two days, this time involving a freight train. Three people were slightly hurt. It came one day after a commuter train crash that injured 16 people. There is conflicting information as to whether or not the crossing gates were up or down at the time.
The M&M balloon at the Macy's Thanksgiving Day parade in New York City snagged a street light, injuring an 11-year-old girl and a 26- year-old woman in a wheelchair. Both were released from the hospital after treatment.
In Iraq, more than 150,000 American troops celebrated Thanksgiving by eating turkey dinners. Army Secretary Francis Harvey visited the troops near Tikrit, northwest of Baghdad. And Harvey praised the soldiers and Marines for their discipline and their professionalism.
Up next, PAULA ZAHN NOW continues, with Paula's interview with television host Joan Lunden on trying to become a mom after 50.
ZAHN: Imagine how you would handle having cancer strike your family not once, but three times. We're focusing on the power of family tonight, and how that power is tested.
Tommy Thompson was secretary of Health and Human Services. Before that, he was a governor. But he's like so many of you men watching now. He's a husband, a father, and, like you, just as vulnerable when the women in his life were diagnosed with breast cancer.
(BEGIN VIDEOTAPE)
THOMPSON: And you immediately start crying, because it's very emotional time when you have your first meeting with your wife and the doctor that she has breast cancer.
ZAHN (voice-over): When Tommy Thompson first learned his wife, Sue Ann (ph), had breast cancer, he knew how deadly her diagnosis could be. His mother-in-law died only six months after she was diagnosed in 1982.
THOMPSON: Then immediately you think, Well, Mother died of cancer. Does this mean I only have six more months, and eight months, or is it -- is she going to survive? It's a real gut reaction, you know, of, you know, of fear and anger that takes over your emotions at that point in time.
ZAHN (on camera): Did you ever let Sue Ann know how scared you were?
THOMPSON: Oh, sure. She could tell.
ZAHN: It's hard to hold that back. But don't you think to be honest is...
THOMPSON: Well, I'm Irish, and I'm very emotional, as you can tell, and you talk about these things that are very -- they're very personal to me, and I get very teary-eyed.
ZAHN (voice-over): Sue Ann Thompson was diagnosed with breast cancer after a routine mammogram in 1994. Tommy Thompson was then governor of Wisconsin.
THOMPSON: And you know so little, and you want to do so much, and you feel just like you're paralyzed, that you can't reach out and say, you know, Stop this. I'm the governor of the state of Wisconsin. You should not be able to do this. You know, but you can't. You're almost helpless. And that was a very difficult thing for me.
ZAHN (on camera): Your reaction was fairly typical to other men I've spoken with who've had wives diagnosed with cancer. It was a bit of a selfish reaction first, and then they go through the stage where they say they get angry, and then they do everything in their power to make sure their wife lives. Is that sort of the arc you went through?
THOMPSON: There's no question about it. It's a very difficult and trying time. Because your wife needs so much support, and then you, of course want to support her. But you are also wondering, what about all these other things that she's been doing and how are you going to be able to fill the void and take care of it. So it has a somewhat of a selfish motive at first but then it turns into something that brings, I believe, in most cases the family closer together and a better family unit.
ZAHN (voice-over): It was an experience that prompted Sue Ann Thompson to create the Wisconsin Women's Health Foundation in 1997. A place for women who need support and information about their own health. It became a family mission when the Thompsons' youngest daughter Tommi started working there in 1999. But little did the Thompsons realize that just five years later, Tommi would face her own health care crisis. At just 33 years old, she also was diagnosed with breast cancer. Tommy Thompson, the father and seasoned politician, was rocked to his core.
THOMPSON: You always believe, you know, your children, you know, are going to be healthy and are going to be able to carry on and why should a child, you know, that's early 30s, come down with breast cancer. First I was governor when my wife came down and now I'm secretary of health and human services, the head of all of the doctors and medical care, and I can't do anything about it.
Why am I failing my daughter in this regard? Why have we been able to find a cure? It was one of not madness or being angry. It was just being upset and frustrated that we haven't been able to come full circle to find a cure for breast cancer.
ZAHN (on camera): Did you ever share your anger with your daughter, Tommi?
THOMPSON: Well, not really because, you know, your wife was there, and you thought, sure, you've won it all. You've been able to defeat this disease and she's been now cancer-free for 11 years. And then get hit, almost in the stomach, by the knowledge that your daughter is coming down with breast cancer. It was very difficult.
ZAHN: Were you afraid of losing your daughter?
THOMPSON: Oh, yes.
ZAHN (voice-over): Perhaps the most difficult thing for Tommy Thompson, the father, was helping his daughter deal with having her breast removed.
THOMPSON: You are the father and you've raised this wonderful child and now she is going to go through this surgery and she's going to lose her breast, and it's very traumatic for her because she was a single girl at the time. Subsequently, she got married. So she was going through all kinds of pangs of anguish and depression. And all you can do is reassure her that she's going to be just as beautiful as ever.
ZAHN (on camera): It was really hard for you, isn't it?
THOMPSON: It is. Very hard.
ZAHN: But there has to be a certain degree of honesty in that conversation, too, right? And an acknowledgment that physically you are changed.
THOMPSON: Yes.
ZAHN (voice-over): Thompson's daughter decided to have the mastectomy that was followed by three months of chemotherapy. Today, she's almost two years cancer-free, and works with her mother to educate women about taking responsibility for their own health.
Thompson's personal experience motivated the then secretary of health and human services to change the national guidelines for mammogram screening. As a result, women are now encouraged to go for their first mammogram when they turn 40, not 50. And despite having stepped down as the secretary a year ago, Thompson is still an outspoken advocate for the cause. Especially the role men must play in fighting the disease.
In his own way, he's a survivor, a survivor of horrible experiences that he says have made him a better man, a better husband, a better father.
THOMPSON: You have to focus on the person that has the cancer and reassure them. By reassuring them, or that person, you strengthen yourself and you strengthen the whole family. So you just got to put aside all your inner thoughts and concerns, your anger and your fears, and really resolve yourself to doing everything you can for the wife, the daughter, the husband, or the son.
(END VIDEOTAPE) ZAHN (on camera): And Tommy Thompson's heartfelt mission goes on. He still pleads for women to get mammograms and regular tests. One study says if women began annual mammogram screening at the age of 40, instead of waiting until they are 50, breast cancer death rates could be cut by 34 percent.
Still ahead tonight -- their numbers are growing. Women over the age of 50 who are starting families or adding to them. How one famous woman made it happen.
(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)
LUNDEN: The only thing that disappointed me about turning to surrogacy was that my husband wouldn't go through the process, that experience of me with the big belly and all of that.
(END VIDEO CLIP)
ZAHN: My interview with Joan Lunden after the birth of her second set of twins.
And a little bit later on, half a million kids in the United States are autistic. I want you to see how one family is not just coping, but overcoming this baffling and challenging disorder.
(COMMERCIAL BREAK)
ZAHN: Welcome back. Tonight, we're focusing in on the power of family. Medicine, of course is helping some families push the age of motherhood to the extreme. The numbers speak for themselves. Births to women between 40 and 44 went up 71 percent in the 1990s. And births to women between 45 and 49 went up 15 percent. TV host Joan Lunden went way beyond those numbers. She's 55 and at that age, many women are looking ahead to retirement. But Joan Lunden is dealing with diapers and lots of them as the mother of four children under the age of three.
(BEGIN VIDEOTAPE)
LUNDEN: Hi, I'm Joan Lunden from Fair Oaks, California. And this is my daughter Jamie. Good morning, America.
ZAHN (voice-over): For 17 years while Joan Lunden was co-host of "Good Morning America," the world watch her raise three daughters. Along the way, she became a role model for working mothers. And then after her well publicized divorce, for single mothers. Now at age 55, she's a role model once again. But this time for a whole new set of moms.
LUNDEN: Now let me just say that men have been having children at 50 and older for decades. But because now medical science has made it possible for women to all of a sudden enter that arena and start having children in their late 40s and early 50s, now it's news.
ZAHN: Joan Lunden would be one of those women trying to have babies in her late 40s with her second husband, Jeff Koningsberg. But getting pregnant wasn't easy.
LUNDEN: It's disappointing every time you hear that it didn't take that time. I mean, it's a real emotional roller coaster.
ZAHN: After five failed in vitro attempts, Lunden's husband suggested surrogacy, but Joan was hesitant.
UNIDENTIFIED MALE: How is she?
ZAHN: Seared in her memory, are the 1980s Baby M custody battle. Surrogate mother Mary Beth Whitehead fought to have custody of the baby she carried for William and Elizabeth Stern.
LUNDEN: I'm one of the people that always reported on the horror stories of surrogacy. And that's all you hear about.
ZAHN: What does it take for a mother of three biological children to surrender to the process of surrogacy?
LUNDEN: To think that you are going to give something so important, so big in your life over to someone else, what if she smokes? What if she didn't take her vitamins? What if she didn't eat the right things? You just can't control any of that. And, I mean, that's when it comes to making sure that you do surrogacy in the right way and that you get matched up with the person that you can sit and look them in the eyes and just say, I have confidence in this person.
ZAHN: That person was Deborah Bolig, a 41-year-old married mother of three. Joan found her through a very experienced surrogacy center in California. A deliberate decision. Unlike most states, California favors the intendant (ph) parents if there's a custody dispute. Something Joan believes is crucial. Deborah had already given birth to twins for a British couple. She'd do that again for Joan and Jeff, becoming their gestational surrogate.
Jeff's sperm fertilized an egg from someone other than Deborah and that egg was implanted in her uterus.
LUNDEN: When you use a gestational carrier, who is not biologically related, she doesn't have any rights to the baby. So that becomes a non-issue and that, to me, took a big load off Jeff's and my shoulders.
ZAHN: Joan won't discuss whether they used her eggs or a donor's. For her that's simply too private to share. But she is candid about everything else. Especially the sense of loss she felt having another woman carry their baby.
LUNDEN: The only thing, the only thing that disappointed me about turning to surrogacy was that my husband wouldn't go through the process that experience of me with the big belly and all of that. So the fact that Deborah was as giving of herself and sharing of herself, that helped that. Because I was worried about him missing out on that.
ZAHN: Despite missing out on those kinds of moments, there are so many other special times that Joan and Jeff experienced. Like when Kate and Max were born in June of 2003.
LUNDEN: I'll never forget when they finally delivered Max, and Pete, Deborah's husband, looked at Jeff and said, when I look at my wife's face, as those babies are handed to you guys, I fall in love with her all over again.
ZAHN (on camera): Oh, wow. That's beautiful.
LUNDEN: Because he's so proud of her. It makes me cry when I say it. It was such an amazing thing to say. That's why I say it's the whole family that does it, not just the mom.
ZAHN (voice-over): A life-long friendship and bond was formed between these two families. Amazingly, less than two years after Max and Kate's birth, Deborah Bolig gave birth to Jeff and Joan's second set of twins. Kimberly and Jack.
UNIDENTIFIED MALE: Wave hi, babies.
UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: Can you wave hi?
ZAHN: Midway through her 50s, Joan Lunden is the mother of two infants, two toddlers and three adult daughters. Perhaps now the ultimate mother, supported by perhaps one of the most devoted husbands.
LUNDEN: We just have an amazingly joyful, full life. As Jeff says, you only go around once on this earth so you might as well make it as great as you can be.
ZAHN (on camera): How many more babies are in your future, Joan?
LUNDEN: None.
ZAHN: That's it. Seven is it.
LUNDEN: Deborah said as we left the hospital, Jeff if you want any more, you need another surrogate. I said, if he wants anymore, he's going to have to get another wife. No, this is it. We have a really great crew.
(END VIDEOTAPE)
ZAHN: But we also need to keep in mind that hiring a surrogate is not for everyone. The costs can run well over $60,000.
Still ahead tonight, I want you to meet a remarkable mom with lessons for all of us.
(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)
UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: You raise the bar. You shoot for the stars. You never, ever let your kids get too comfortable because that's where they live. You need to challenge them.
(END VIDEO CLIP) ZAHN: How one family is overcoming autism. Yes, it can be done. Stay with us.
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ZAHN: About half a million children in this country are autistic. Imagine the challenges their families face handling this very mysterious disorder of the mind. Where the children often feel frightened and isolated and sometimes even unreachable. But I want you to meet one autistic young man and his mother who whose struggle led to an unexpected journey towards achieving a dream.
(BEGIN VIDEOTAPE)
UNIDENTIFIED MALE: A challenge for me, it has to be the challenge of life.
UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: It's like putting a label on somebody and calling them that.
UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: I have been teased.
ZAHN (voice-over): They are the honest candid emotions of autistic teenagers, captured by this 16-year-old documentary filmmaker.
TAYLOR CROSS, AUTISTIC FILMMAKER: My dream is to be a filmmaker and this will look good on my resume.
ZAHN: For Taylor Cross to even consider that dream was a long shot. You see, Taylor, too, is autistic.
CROSS: Back then, I was in my own little world. When I was younger than that, I was also told that I may never be able to walk and talk and other stuff like that. But I did sure show them, didn't I?
ZAHN (on camera): What do you want people to know about what the hardest thing is about being autistic?
CROSS: Is that you know you're not everyone else. And like you are striving to be everyone else, but you just can't get to that level.
ZAHN: So chasing a dream that's not even realistic basically?
CROSS: Yes.
ZAHN (voice-over): Taylor and his mother Keri Bowers, have been chasing that dream for years. Since the day Taylor was born, life has been a challenge. Those first years usually filled with excitement and wonder were filled with frustration and heartache. Taylor missed every major milestone. He didn't make sounds, crawl, or smile. And he couldn't give his mother the one thing that all new parents yearn for. KERI BOWERS, MOTHER OF AUTISTIC TEEN: My son couldn't hug me, and he wasn't speaking, and he wasn't crawling and he wasn't -- his head was like a floppy doll, and he had no muscle tone, very low muscle tone.
ZAHN (on camera): How devastating was that for you?
BOWERS: I was angry. How dare you not love me? I just thought that I was somehow a bad mother.
ZAHN (voice-over): A frustrating journey of misdiagnoses and confusion began. Some called it mentally retarded. Others called it developmentally delayed. Whatever words they used, the prognosis was grim. It would take six years and dozens of hospital visits before Taylor was correctly diagnosed. High functioning autism. A mysterious brain disorder that leads to a variety of developmental problems.
BOWERS: I decided, we're in this together, and we'll do it. I'm sorry. I'm so surprised I'm this emotional. We'll do whatever we need to do together, except we'll never ask why God, why me, again.
I started work with Taylor very young and did some things people consider controversial or questionable.
ZAHN (on camera): And aggressive.
BOWERS: Very aggressive.
ZAHN: You made him use language when he was inclined not to talk.
BOWERS: He had a few words. So I knew he could say a few words. He'd point up to the cupboard and say eat. And I would look at him and say, if you are hungry, say two words. I'm hungry, want eat, food please, something and then I would leave the room. And eventually. I didn't starve him, so don't get me wrong.
ZAHN: It doesn't look like it, mom. At 6'7", I think he's just doing fine.
BOWERS: It was a way for him to begin to reach higher.
ZAHN (voice-over): Taylor never stopped growing. Every day, overcoming the challenges that face many autistics. Like feeling bombarded, and overwhelmed by the fast paced world.
BOWERS: The world doesn't slow down for these children, and they process on a very different level. When he has a very stressful situation, socially he'll come home and sleep for hours.
ZAHN: Socially, life can be especially difficult for autistic teenagers. Especially as they navigate the turbulent waters of high school.
(on camera): Have they picked on you because they think you are different?
CROSS: Yeah, that's true.
ZAHN: And how do you deal with that?
CROSS: Normally, I'm angry about it, but I don't get too emotional about it. And I'll have problems with telling it to an adult or something.
BOWERS: Taylor has been physically assaulted twice by two different boys in the last six months.
ZAHN: At his school?
BOWERS: At his school. Now he's 6'7". He's a big kid. These kids, I think they sense a certain sweetness, a certain weakness if you will, a certain naivete. And he was assaulted, hit in the face and didn't tell a soul he had been harassed for months.
ZAHN (voice-over): A painful time for any teen. But Taylor is learning to deal with the bullies and others who look at him as different. How? Well, that brings us back to his documentary.
UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: I work with a lot of students with severe disabilities.
ZAHN: Taylor hopes it will break down the barriers between his autistic community and the outside, quote, "normal" world. The documentary is being shown at film festivals, as well as in local schools. Taylor has won awards. And has decided to transform his 10- minute documentary into a feature film so more people will see it.
(on camera): What do you dream about doing some day, Taylor. Do you think much about that?
CROSS: I've got it all planned out. I want to do this, want to do this, want to do that. Like for now, I just want to be a filmmaker. I'm hoping to go to college here at NYU. There's a whole bunch of other stuff I want to do, too.
ZAHN: So you are a pretty happy guy aren't you?
CROSS: I guess you could say so.
ZAHN: What is it that you want other parents to know about what their life might be like, once they get a diagnosis of autism?
BOWERS: I want parents to know that you raise the bar. You shoot for the stars. You never, ever let your kids get too comfortable because that's where they live. You need to challenge them. You need to push them.
CROSS: Challenge, entice and educate.
ZAHN: I like that. He sounds like you have learned that lesson.
BOWERS: He's come with me ...
ZAHN: Or he is sick of hearing it from mom, one of the two?
BOWERS: A little of both, probably.
CROSS: A little of both.
ZAHN (voice-over): A path this mother and son started down 16 years ago. An unexpected journey this mother has learned to love and to cherish.
BOWERS: He'll just be one of those creative, wonderful individuals who is a little quirky. That's all. So to touch, move and inspire people. That's finally, ultimately, our goal.
CROSS: Yes. That is.
(END VIDEOTAPE)
ZAHN (on camera): And you'll be happy to hear this. Taylor has been working with a producer, Joey Travolta, John Travolta brother, to turn his documentary into a feature film. It debuts in January of 2006.
And Taylor's mother Keri has started a non-profit group called Artists for Autism to train people with autism to work in the arts. You can find out more about that at artistsforautism.com.
I want to thank you for spending this holiday with me. I hope you have been inspired by the fathers, mothers and children you've met tonight. Their stories certainly show us how the power of family can help us meet some of life's toughest challenges and they all remind us of how thankful we should be. We wish you and your family a very Happy Thanksgiving. Good night.
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